A/N: Okay. This is a one shot in impulse. Did it for like, 45 minutes(?). Right after updating my info, I decided to do this one shot. Review, please. I need constructives. Thanks. Italics signify the flashbacks and ironic words, by the way. - Marian
"You never listened! You just keep on insisting on what you want!" Those encouraging words from my mother rang in my mind. That was all she told me when I told her what a great time I am having with the WWE. I ran to the locker room and locked myself in there. I took a deep breath and rage was running in my system.
"It's just one additional cut." I told myself as I reached for my kit in my bag. "What the hell could go wrong?"
I positioned the blade on my arm, being careful not to hit my pulse. I slowly cut it right through my skin and blood was gushing. Thank God it was not much blood or else it'll spell trouble. I decided to do another one. Well, that's two for today. Those cuts made my day like each one of my cuts made a few other days. I remember how this started just like it was yesterday.
"You're no good!" my mother shouted at me. Tears were forming in my eyes but I held them back. There is no way I'm gonna let these out, not in front of my mother. "All you did was write all of these senseless things about…wrestling! Let me ask you, will these bring you somewhere good? No, they won't! So, follow my advice! I don't want to see you writing ever again! You hear me?"
I just stood in front of her. I glared at her and ran upstairs to my room. I immediately slammed the door shut and the tears already flowed. I buried my head on the pillow and cried for like, two hours.
I got out of the locker room wearing a sweatshirt to cover the cuts and decided to walk around the arena. I want to take my mind out off of these things.
"Hey!" a male voice called out. I didn't turn around. "Hey! Alexis!"
I finally turned around and saw John Cena run towards me with a smile. The only person (the only guy at that) who really understood me and listened to me. I just faked one so he wouldn't be asking anything. I won't spill just in case he does.
"What're you doing here all alone?" he asked.
"Nothing, really." I lied. His eyes looked like they were searching for a hint of lies in my face but I made my face look like there was nothing wrong.
"Ya sure?"
"Yeah."
"Let's go to catering." he took hold of my arm, causing me to wince. I took hold of that arm and let out an "Ow."
"What's wrong?" he asked as he let go of my arm.
"Nothing." I lied again. "I'm okay."
His eyes darted to my arm and pointed at my jacket sleeve. "There's blood on your jacket."
My eyes widened and I immediately looked at the sleeve. "Shit." I mumbled to myself.
"Roll it up." he ordered.
I shook my head. "Please." he said as he took hold of my shoulder. I still refused.
"You're not my father!" I snapped out. "Just leave me alone, okay! I'm not in the mood to spill!"
I ran away from him but judging from the sound of footsteps, he followed me. I turned around and gave him a glare. His eyes locked with mine. "What?" I shot.
"You didn't have to lie." he said. "Remember what I told you before?"
"Yeah. You told me you're always gonna be there." I replied, taking my eyes off his stare. That made me realize that I really had to open up now. We sat on the bench and as we did that, I slowly rolled up my sleeves. He looked surprised. Well, he was.
"What the fuck are you doing?" he exclaimed with a hint of concern.
"I hurt myself." I replied with a smirk. "What does it look like? I mean, my mother hates me. All of those words just cut right through me. I couldn't take it anymore. That feeling sucks! Those words remain etched in my mind to this day. No one really loves me or cares about me or whatever."
"Well, you have me." he said as he held my hand. "I'm your friend. What are friends for?"
"How sure am I you're not gonna leave me?" I rolled my eyes as I asked this question.
"You can count on me. I promise." he pulled me in a hug and I wrapped my arms around me.
That was the first time I felt really good. Tears came out of my eyes and I hope he doesn't care about me getting his shirt wet. John Cena remained true to his word. He was there for me. I did some cuts on other days but I made sure he didn't know. I didn't want him to get mad at me for this. He was my only shield. The only one who basically cared about my issues.
Two years later…
I got really comfortable with myself now. The confidence that I lost two years ago came back to me and it made me energized everyday. I get to wear sleeveless wrestling gear already! Thank goodness!
"Well, hello." John greeted me as I approached him backstage.
"Hey you." I said with a smile.
He looked at me and said "You look nice today compared to the last time." with a smile.
"I know." I smiled back at him. "That cream worked. I swear to myself I'll never do it again. Ever."
He chuckled and said "Good. Wanna go with me after the show, have something to eat?"
I nodded with a bright smile. The brightest one I had ever flashed ever since. I gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek and ran off to the locker room to prepare for my match. That smile remained plastered on my face. I hope this goes on forever.
