"No! No! Please don't do this!" I was trapped, helpless. I could feel his hot breath on my neck, and heard his quiet laughter. I was his. There was nothing I could do about it. I could never get away. What was even worse, the louder I screamed, the quieter my voice seemed. I felt as though I had to be screaming at the top of my lungs but nothing was coming out. "Please just let me die," I thought pitifully to myself. I didn't know how much longer I could take this. All of a sudden he opened his mouth, I waited to hear what he could possibly have to say.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!
My alarm was going off. I opened my eyes in relief and realized I was covered in sweat. Everything was fine. I was in Forks, in the home I had lived in for such a short time, and had now come to stay. I shook off the dream and turned off my alarm. Today would be my first day at a new school. All I wanted was to blend in and go unnoticed. That was all I could ask of the world.
I showered quickly and put on a pair of jeans and a plain t-shirt and sweatshirt. I just prayed this would help me blend into the crowd. I don't think I could handle attention right now. I slowly gathered my things and made my way out to my truck. I climbed in and sighed, laying my head on the steering wheel, "Ok. You can do this Bella. Come on." I felt pitiful having to tell myself it was going to be ok. I felt weak. Determined to be stronger, I sat up rigidly, and started the drive to school. It was raining, but this was to be expected. After all, Forks was the absence of light. I had to learn to accept that the rain would be there every day. I pulled up to the school and quickly shut off my truck; the engine was loud, no need to draw attention to. I noted that many of the cars in the parking lot didn't look much better than mine, that was good. It wouldn't stick out.
I reached into my bag and pulled out my class schedule, and a map of the school. I studied them both meticulously so I wouldn't have to pull them out again. I walked with my head down, towards my first class and took a seat in the back. The bell rang for class to start, and I noticed to my dismay, half the class must have been turned around looking at me. I could feel my cheeks turning red, "My god, they all know," I thought in a panic. Then I realized that was impossible and relaxed ever so slightly. All of a sudden, to my horror, the teacher was calling out my name, "Bella? Bella Swan?" I looked up and he was staring at me. I realized in a town this small he would obviously know who I was. That must be the reason all the students were staring at me. I was new. An anomaly. No one willingly moved to Forks. My arrival must have made people talk. I realized the teacher was asking me to get up and introduce myself to the class. I slowly stood and walked to the front of the class, debating running out the door, but I realized that would only create more mystery, causing people to ask even more questions. I stumbled at the front, and mumbled out my name, and that I had just moved from Arizona. I shut my mouth after that and quickly made my way back to my seat. The teacher and students looked surprised. I guess they had thought I would have more to say. Tough luck guys. The rest of the day passed in a blur. Many students tried to throw me a life line by speaking to me, or making a joke. Whenever this happened, I just ignored the culprit, praying they would just let me be. They soon gave up and went back to talking to other, more willing participants. I wasn't here to make friends. I was here to finish school and move somewhere far away from the west coast and never come back. Lunch finally came and I was grateful. I could go sit somewhere quietly by myself. I reached the cafeteria and grabbed only a water. I scanned the cafeteria and saw several people with friendly expressions, as though inviting me to sit with them. I ignored them all in favor of an empty table in the back of the cafeteria. I quickly put my headphones in and pulled out a book, Jane Austin. I loved the classics. It seemed I could always lose myself in them. All of a sudden several heavy books were dropped on the table in front of me. I jumped and felt my whole face go white. I looked up to see an angry face scowling at me. I slowly pulled my headphones out, it was obvious he had already said something to me.
"You're in my seat," he said angrily.
"Oh. I'm. . .sorry. Is it ok if I sit here?" I said all this in a very small voice. I was terrified and didn't want to antagonize him any further. He seemed to study me in a calculating way, before finally shrugging and sitting down across from me. I wasn't sure whether or not he would say anything, but I turned off my ipod and put my headphones away just in case. I continued to read my book but I was distracted; I could feel his eyes glaring at me. I was still afraid. I wasn't sure what to make of this angry stranger, or why he was so upset with me. I finally looked up to see if he was still looking at me. He had only a salad and was staring at me while chewing it thoughtfully. He seemed less upset than before, but by no means happy. I felt my cheeks turn red and quickly turned back to my book.
"What's your name?" He finally asked.
"Bella."
"I'm Edward."
"It's nice to meet you," I mumbled quietly and looked back down to my book. I hadn't made an effort to talk to anyone in so long I had forgotten how. I didn't know what else to say. I couldn't think of a socially acceptable question to ask, and I was nervous enough just introducing myself. I could feel his frustration radiating off of him. Perhaps he wasn't used to people being so rude. After what seemed only minutes of peace, the bell rang and he quickly gathered his things to leave. I panicked, for some reason, I couldn't stand him leaving thinking I was rude, "Bye," I called out quietly.
He stopped in his tracks, and turned slowly around. I forced myself to meet his gaze, and to not be the first to look away. He didn't look angry anymore, just curious, and maybe frustrated still, "Bye," he managed before he turned and walked quickly away. I sighed. I felt drained. I wasn't used to being around people who expected me to speak and acknowledge their presence. I hadn't felt bad about being ignoring anyone, why did I feel bad for not saying more to him? I didn't know.
