So I had a few ideas for some Bellarke one-shots but when I went to write them it was just too much so I decided to blend them together for a multi chapter. Hopefully it turns out as awesome as it is in my head. I should add that the shaving scene that will be in this was an idea I got from Tumblr. I had the name or the person saved but it is now gone so I am sooooo sorry about that…I wanted to give you credit for that.
I stood there by Bellamy's side looking at the new planet in awe. I promised myself that I would honor Monty's wishes and do better. I was going to miss him and Harper but it was nice to have Jordan with us…it was like we got to keep a small piece of each of them with us.
"I guess we should decide who we are waking up first." I finally said. I glanced over at him, everytime I looked at him my mind wondered to a dark place. I almost lost him and I had no one to blame but myself.
"In a minute." Bellamy finally answered still staring out at the planet. Bellamy had spent six years with Harpor and Monty they were closer than I had ever been he lost two members of his family and I knew he was hurting. I squeezed him in closer to me for a few seconds before letting go and turning to look at Jordan, but he was no where around.
"Bellamy what is that?" I said looking at the large wet stain on his shirt sleeve.
Bellamy rolled up his sleeve and the huge gash on his arm became visible. "This? Just a war wound." He said staring at the gash. He tried to play it off like it was nothing but I could tell he was just trying to cover it up.
I sighed. "It's from the pit isn't it?" I walked closer and took his arm gently in my hands to examine the cut more closely.
"Doesn't matter." He said quietly.
"Bellamy…"
"It doesn't even hurt."
"Well hurting or not you need some stitches. Come on…guess they will get to nap a bit longer while I fix you up."
Bellamy sat on the exam table while I gathered up everything I needed.
"Why don't you lay down…it will probably make it easy to stich you up." Once he was lying down I gently took his arm in my hands and laid it in a position so I could work on it. "There is nothing to numb it so you are going to feel everything." I looked up at him and he gave me a nod and a tight smile.
I made it to the halfway point when my eyes began to fill with tears. He was so lucky to come out of that pit with only this huge gash on his arm. What if whoever did this was a few feet over…it could have been his throat.
"Hey what's the matter?" Bellamy sat up and had a look of concern on his face.
"Don't move." I said wiping a tear away with the back of my hand.
"Clarke…stop for a minute. What is going on?"
I shook my head and continued to stare at his long red gash. "I am so sorry Bellamy."
"Clarke it's…"
"No." I said shaking my head and standing up. I grabbed the tissue from the counter and wiped my eyes. "Don't tell me it is okay. I have had so many nightmares of you dying in that pit. I should have sent Maddi away and stayed to help you." I shook my head again. "I should have saved you." I whispered.
Bellamy slid off of the exam table and walked over to me. "Listen to me." He said as he gently placed his hands on my arms. "Hey listen to me." He repeated as he moved his head around until he locked eyes with me. "You did what you had to do to protect your daughter, that's who you are."
"Bellamy…"I started as I shook my head again. I honestly didn't know why he was forgiving me so easily but I was convinced I didn't deserve it.
"Stop, blaming yourself. I don't. I am here. I'm okay." He paused. "Monty and Harper sacrificed their lives to find us a new home…for us to start over." I nodded. "You just need to forgive yourself…because I forgave you a while ago."
I gave him a small weak smile and nodded. "I just…I just don't want you to think that I don't care about you…because I do…so much."
Bellamy gently squeezed my arms and smiled. "I know you do. And I care about you too." He paused. "And Madi."
I gently took his arm in my hands again. "Come on lets finish stitching you up." Just as I was finishing up I looked up at him. "So I was thinking we should wake up family first. Unless you want some time with Echo before things get crazy again." I started to clean up. I didn't want to really look at him while talking about Echo, I hated to admit it even to myself but I was jealous of her.
"Actually…" I saw Bellamy sit up from the corner of my eye. "Echo and I broke up just before she went into cryo."
I froze then turned to look at him. "Oh, I'm sorry." I paused and turned back around. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"No, it's okay…I'm okay. Things changed when we got to the ground. Echo and I made sense on the ring but on the ground…"
After washing and putting everything away I turned to look at Bellamy. Part of me wanted to ask what changed, how were things different, but I didn't. We stared at eachother for a few moments until I finally brought myself to break to heavy silence.
"How about if we wake Raven and Shaw first?"
Bellamy smiled and nodded. "Yeah, that sounds good."
Hope you enjoyed Chapter 1! Leave a review and let me know what you thought!
