If you weren't me, you probably wouldn't know how I felt. There's only one word to describe it... Worthless. Do you believe in soul mates? How about a person without one? It's a strange feeling but then again... you wouldn't know.
"Why do I live on this planet? What is my purpose? Sometimes I feel like the last of my kind, as though no one understands. Will I live my whole life like this??" I thought as I lifted my head from my pillow. I looked to the clock on my desk. It was early, 2 AM to be exact. Not having eaten all day, I slowly made my way down the stairs. My legs felt a million tons each... My heart even heavier.
I walked slowly to the kitchen, and, opening the refrigerator, noticed that there was not much to eat. So, I turned to the pantry and pulled out a bag of chips. By now I had tears in my eyes.
Suddenly I heard a voice. I turned quickly and saw my sister standing in the door way. I clenched the bag, almost squishing all the chips.
"What's your problem? And why weren't you in skool today?" Gaz asked. I just shrugged. "What's your problem?" She repeated. "You took my Game Slave, didn't you?" She asked angrily.
"No. What are you doing up?" I replied.
"I could ask you the same question..." She stated. I then noticed the phone off of the receiver.
"Who are you talking to?" I asked.
"What's it to you?" She asked, picking up the phone from where she had set it down for a moment. "Zim? You still there? I gotta go."
"Zim? You were talking to ZIM?!!"
"So? Gaz, you're weirder than I am."
"No one else seems to think so."
"Hmm... Yeah, you're right." I said, sinking back into my depression. There was a slight pause, then Gaz spoke again.
"You're going to do it, aren't you?" She said, sounding strangely worried.
"Do it?" I asked, puzzled.
"Don't act like you don't know... I've read your letters to Madelyn."
"I..." Was all I said before being interrupted by my father who was rarely home. He emerged from his lab suddenly.
"Gaz, Dib... You should be getting some sleep. It's 2 AM. Sleep is good for you..."
"I HATE YOU DAD!" I suddenly burst out. "I hate you all!! You don't understand anything!!!" I ran up to my room and slammed the door shut. I took my glasses and flung them across the room, knocking over the only picture of my mother I had, shattering the glass. I fell to my knees in complete dispair. Crying hard I picked up the picture, a small piece of glass falling into my hand. "Mom... You were the only one who ever cared for me. Why did you do it? Did you feel like I do?" I wondered out loud. I dropped the picture of my mother, holding the glass tightly. I then lifted it to my wrist. I was about to do what so many before me had done... I knew their pain well now. I was having second thoughts but I couldn't stop now.
I cut hard into my right wrist, watching as so much blood spilled out. I ignored the pain as I kept cutting. By the time I started on my left wrist, the blood was all over my clothes and started pooling around my feet.
Gaz walked in with a sandwich for me, hopping to maybe make me feel better, but she screamed as she saw the blood and saw me falling over. She dropped the sandwich and rushed to my side.
"DIB!! Dib, can you hear me???" She screamed, crying.
"Y-yes..." I said, barely hearing her words. Then my dad ran in.
"What's all the... DIB!!" He yelled, picking me up in shock. "It'll be OK Son... Gaz, call 911."
"I never knew you... c-cared." I whispered, as that was all I could do.
"Of course I care," he cried, "you're my Son..."
All I remembered from that point until waking up in the hospital was flashing lights, whirring sirens, my dad holding my hand and telling the doctors about my allergies, being wheeled into a large white room, my sister constantly telling me that it would be okay... Then blacking out...
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Oooooo..... betchya can't wait 'till the next chapter. It may take me a while to get it up here, but.... see ya then...
