Untitled [DGM]

Summary: Allen and Lavi decide that Kanda acts too much like a girl. Fem! Kanda (maybe) although they have yet to find out.

I don't own DGM.

Warnings: Potential OOC, crackiness in general. Not beta'd

Note: This is in no way a sexist fic.

Now, before you start reading, go and get a cup of that trusty ol' Brain Bleach that should be in the second drawer to your right. Ingest it somehow and forget every shirtless scene of Kanda you've ever seen. Still with me? Haven't passed out yet? Okay, you can read now.


Allen sighed and ate another bite of his ice cream. Then he sighed again. Lavi, just passing by, saw him sigh and immediately knew: The Black Order was in trouble. Allen was bored with eating. And when Allen was bored, he started to think.

Lavi, sensing this, walked over and sat next to Allen - It wasn't as if he had anything planned, anyway - in an attempt to lessen the inevitable damage.

"Hey Allen, what's up?" Trying to break Allen out of his daze, he began to speak. Luckily, he was successful. Allen blinked and turned to face Lavi. Out of his mouth came four ominous words:

"Lavi, I've been thinking," The redhead gulped. This was not a good sign.

"Isn't Kanda a little too...Girly?"


Lavi blinked.

"Girly?" Allen nodded.

"Yeah! He's always refusing to cut that long hair of his, and he makes sure never to attend the baths with us. I think...," Allen leaned in conspiratorially towards Lavi. Lavi stiffened in worry. "... We need to help him man up!" The redhead slumped in relief.

Well, that wasn't too bad.

"Sure," Lavi replied. "But how do you want to do that?" Allen smiled.

"Well...," he drawled, "I think that we should -" There was that ominous word again. Think, Lavi rushed to interrupt Allen.

"We'll see how well he can handle spicy food!" Allen heard his idea and pouted.

"How is that supposed to be manly?" Lavi smirked.

"Well, even you have some trouble eating spicy things. Don't you both need some help 'manning up' then?" Allen glared.

"Fine then! An eating contest it is! Whoever can take the spiciest food wins!" With that he stomped off. "I'm gonna go get Kanda! You take care of the food!" Lavi maintained his smile until Allen disappeared. Then he sighed and relaxed.

Whew. Disaster thwarted.

Then he turned to go warn Jerry about his role in stopping the potential disaster.


...IDK.

Written on a whim, tell me if you want to see more :) No pairing as of yet, but...I need help in deciding whether Allen or Lavi falls for Kanda.

Please tell me whether you want Kanda to end up as a girl or a guy(I won't be continuing until I get at least five votes on this), and if there are any ideas/challenges you want to see.

Review? :)

P.S. Allen's idea was to go bungee-jumping and see how high-pitched Kanda screams. He's such a genius, isn't he?