Disclaimers: I don't own the characters, but that doesn't mean that I won't try my best to persuade them to stay…
A/N: It's a bit disturbing, but I heard the song "Damaged" by Plumb (on the cd candycoatedwaterdrops) and this had to be written. It was as though the last two lines brought an entire story into my mind with eighteen words. I'm debating about adding more, but I've basically got that feeling that there's no better way to write this.
Dedication: To those out there that have lived in this world and were surprised that I had not save in my imagination for the sake of writing. And to my "sister" who I found because of this story and how much it meant to her.
Maria DeLuca sat at the counter at the Crashdown with a book open in front of her. She really wasn't paying attention to the words. She didn't need the book anyway. She could recite Romeo and Juliet at command. But now, her mind was on other things, or rather, another person. Which is why, when she felt him sit beside her, she didn't need to look up for conformation. There was something about Michael Guerin that could almost make her forget. But that same part often times made her remember.
She wasn't quite sure what it was that she felt for him. It was…complicated. For anyone else, it might be defined as love. But for Maria, love was only a fairy tale word. There was no such thing as true love. Or was there?
Could she be in love? Could he possibly love her back? She shook the thoughts from her head. After all, if he knew, he would never love her. No one would.
Dreaming comes so easily
'Cause it's all that I've known
True love is a fairy tale
I'm damaged, so how would I know
Michael silently waited for Maria to look up at him. When she did, her green eyes had a haunted look to them and her smile was fake. "Hey." She said.
Michael frowned, "Are you alright, Maria?" Something must be wrong. No jokes about his hair or clothes, no witty remarks, no silly conversation. Just a tired "Hey."
She stretched her arms in front of her, "I'm okay. You?"
Michael almost did a double take. Not only was she not playing around, she was actually asking how he was. "I'm good...I guess. Maria, can I talk to you? Alone?"
She sighed as she closed her book and they rose from the counter. She led him into the back room and sat on the couch.
Michael pulled a chair in front of her and sat in it backwards. He stared at her for a full minute before speaking. "I wanted to say I'm sorry."
"For what?" She looked a little confused.
Michael took a deep breath and almost quit right there. But this had been on his mind for some time and he really needed to talk to her before he lost his nerve again. "For everything. Mostly the way I've been acting. I haven't been exactly honest with you."
Maria leaned forward a little and waited for him to continue. When he didn't, she pressed, "What do you mean you haven't been exactly honest with me?"
He looked down at his shoes and his forehead creased, "I wasn't being honest…when I told you that I needed to be alone. I…" he trailed off.
Maria just sat in shocked silence. "Oh?" she finally managed to squeak.
Michael nodded and looked her in the eye, "I need you. I've never needed anyone. I didn't want to ever need anyone…to depend on anyone. I've been let down too many times." He looked ready to bolt if she gave him any negative signals. "I love you Maria. I need you."
Her expression softened and before she knew it, she was swept into a passionate kiss. It wasn't like the ones they had shared during the heat wave. It was tender and raw at the same time. She knew he was finally being honest. Not just with her, with himself. All of her previous thoughts flew out of her mind as she returned his kiss and slid her arms around his neck. She had missed the sensations that she felt whenever their lips met. She had told Liz once that it was as though every molecule in her body were on fire. She was right.
He eased her lips apart and pulled her a little closer. His hands roamed across her back and down to her waist.
Maria let out a small sigh of pleasure as his fingers crept up under her sweater and rubbed against her back. That was when it hit her.
She froze and pulled away quickly, causing Michael to be temporarily stunned.
As the nightmares crept back into her mind, she ran out the back entrance and across the parking lot to her car.
Michael watched, confused and a little hurt, as she drove off.
Later that night, Michael stood in the alley beside the Crashdown looking up. "Liz!" he hissed.
A moment later, a surprised looking Liz Parker peered over the edge of the roof. "Michael? What are you doing here?"
"I need to talk to you."
Liz nodded, "Come on up." Michael made quick work of the climb and was soon standing in front of her. "What is it? Is something wrong?"
Michael looked around, "I'm not sure. It's about Maria…" he paused and looked at her to see her reaction. He still didn't know why he was here. It seemed he was just full of surprises today. First his confession to Maria, now going to Liz for help.
A worried look came over Liz's face. "What is it?"
"I…I'm not sure. We were talking earlier…and…" he mentally kicked himself for being embarrassed, "I told her how much she meant to me…and I kissed her."
Liz smiled a bit, "I still don't see the problem. What'd she say?"
Michael shifted a bit, "She didn't say anything. We were kissing…"
Liz waited patiently, knowing how hard this was for Michael to talk about to anyone, much less her.
Michael cleared his throat, "And I had my hand on her back…and when I touched her skin…" he shook his head, "she froze. And the next thing I knew, she was in her car and driving off." He ran a hand through his hair exasperated. He didn't notice Liz's face go white as she sank down onto her lawn chair. He did however hear her whispered comment.
"Oh God…"
