Bella walked into Edward's kitchen that smelled of lemons and old socks I used to wipe myself up with. She looked through the cabinets for some food. She found a box of instant mashed potatoes and put it in the microwave. DING! It was done and she pulled it out. Then Edward walked in with his bright shiny hair.

"What are you eating?" Edward asked

Bella got a big spoonful of mashed potatoes and placed it sexily into her mouth, "Some smashed potatoes, mmmm"

Just then Edward got a massive erection, "Oh God! What's happening? That's so hot!" The mashed potatoes reminded him so much of Bella he couldn't control it. Edward unzipped his pants and pulled out his massive 12 inch cock and began to work the shaft. He went back and forth repeatedly, faster and faster. "Oh fu…oh yeah…"

Then Jacob walked in and said, "Hey,"

"Hey," Edward said, still jacking off as hard as he could.

"What's going on?" Jacob asked, gesturing to Edward's enormous man sausage.

"Look over there," Edward said, motioning to Bella who was still eating massive amounts of instant mashed potatoes. Just then Jacob got an erection, "Whoa! Oh man, that's so fucking hot," "I know, right?!" Edward replied. Then Jacob whipped out his own 3 foot dick and asked, "Think you could help me out?" Edward smirked, "Of course, if you can help me out with mine," Jacob smiled back and gave thumbs up. Edward grabbed Jacob's cock and began jerking it off and so did Jacob, to Edwards cock. Bella continued to eat potatoes.

All of the sudden Abraham Lincoln burst through the door and was all like "WTF?! Whats going on?!"

"I'm jerking off Jacob!" Edward said, "And he's jerking me off!"

"Well I want in!" Lincoln exclaimed and pulled down his pants and started jerking off.

"Wait a minute," Jacob said, "Why don't we all have sex with each other?"

"That's a good idea" Said Edward, "I call Lincoln's ass,"

"I call his mouth!" shouted Jacob

Then Edward shoved his throbbing cock into Lincoln's tight asshole and rammed it home while Jacob slid his manhood into Lincoln's quivering mouth. They ran a super hot train on him. Bella continued to eat potatoes.

Then Robocop walked through the hole Lincoln left and said, "Dead or Alive, you're cumming with me!" and didn't even wait to ask but pulled out his hydraulic penis he created from some wires, a hard pvc tube, and a screw driver and began jerking off. "mmmmffffhh!!!" Lincoln said, because he had a 3 foot cock in his mouth. Robocop looked to the kitchen and saw a sexy male toaster and said, "You're move creep!" The toaster popped down its lever and said, "Father!" "Nooooooooooooooooooo!" Robocop yelled. Then Robocop grabbed the toaster and began to fuck it. The toaster looked to Robocop and said, "I've always loved you, please fuck me harder," so Robocop did. "Oh yeah, that's right," Bella continued to eat potatoes.

Then there was a knock at the door and it was The Phantom in his super awesome purple suit, "Mind if I join?" Everyone looked to see how awesome he was.

"We're kinda full dude," Edward said.

"Yeah," Jacob said.

"Mmmmmfeeakkall," Lincoln said

Robocop said nothing.

"I'm a toaster," said the toaster.

Bella ate more potatoes cause she's not as cool as the Phantom.

The Phantom raised an eyebrow and said, "No one refuses the Phantom," then he pulled out his mile long cock and raped everyone except Bella who continued to eat potatoes.