A Gleeky Tribute To Rent
Rachel's P.O.V
It's just like any other day I'm sitting and chatting with Kurt, Mercedes and Blaine.
"I have a genius idea for your assignment this week!" Mr. Shuester announced rushing into the choir room.
He then wrote Rent on the dry erase board.
"Um Mr. Shuester are you having trouble paying your rent?" Finn asked confused.
"No Finn he means the classic Musical rent that defined a generation remember the one that I forced everyone to watch at the glee sleepover." I stated.
"Oh the one with the hot stripper and lesbians." Noah recalled.
"Well back to the point we are doing a tribute to Rent this week!" Mr. Shuester announced.
Everyone clapped, well mostly the girls and Kurt and Blaine.
"What's the time?" Kurt sang as a joke.
"Well it's gotta be close to midnight." I giggled giving him a wink.
"Rachel and Puck can you demonstrate?" Mr. Shuester handed us lyrics to 'I should tell you.'
"Sure!" We both agreed moving to the front of the room.
We stood facing each other and as the music started we were circling each other.
Puck:
I Should Tell You I'm Disaster
I Forget How To Begin It
Rachel:
Let's Just Make This Part Go Faster
I Have Yet - To Be In It
I Should Tell You
Puck:
I Should Tell You
Rachel:
I Should Tell You
Puck:
I Should Tell You
Rachel:
I Should Tell I Blew The Candle Out
Just To Get Back In
Puck:
I'd Forgotten How to Smile
Until Your Candle Burned My Skin
Rachel:
I Should Tell You
Puck:
I Should Tell You
Rachel:
I Should Tell You
BOTH:
I Should Tell
Well, Here We Go
Now We-
Rachel:
Oh No
Puck:
I Know-This Something Is
Here Goes-
Rachel:
Here Goes
Puck:
Guess So
It's Starting To
-Who Knows-
Rachel:
Who Knows
Both:
Who Knows Where
Who Goes There
Who Knows
Here Goes
Trusting Desire - Starting To Learn
Walking Through Fire Without A Burn
Clinging - A Shoulder, A Leap Begins
Stinging And Older, Asleep On Pins
So Here We Go
Now We-
Puck:
Oh No
Rachel:
I Know
Puck:
Oh No
BOTH:
Who Knows Where - Who Goes There
Here Goes - Here Goes
Here Goes - Here Goes
Here Goes - Here Goes
Noah and I ended the song in an intense look.
"Wanna come to Breadstix with all of us tonight?" Noah asked.
"Sure!" I smiled.
At Breadstix
"Oh god St. Jackass is here!" Noah told the rest of us.
Jesse
Rachel- I'm surprised
A bright and charming girl like you
Hangs out with these slackers
(Who don't adhere to deals)
They make fun -Yet I am the one
Attempting to do some good
Or do you really want a neighborhood
Where people piss on your stoop every night?
Bohemia, Bohemia
Is a fallacy in your head
This is Calcutta
Bohemia is dead
(Noah stood on a table while the girls faked cry
PUCK
Dearly beloved, we gather here to say
our goodbyes
Glee
Dies Irae - Dies Illa
Kyrie Eleison
Yitgadal V' Yitkadash (etc.)
Puck
Here she lies
No one knew her worth
The late great daughter of Mother Earth
On these nights when we celebrate the birth
In that little town of Bethlehem
We raise our glass- You bet your ass to-
La Vie Boheme
(Santana and Brittany flipped the bottom of their skirts up.)
ALL
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
Puck
To days of inspiration,
Playing hookey, making something
Out of nothing, the need
To express-
To communicate,
To going against the grain,
Going insane,
Going mad
To loving tension, no pension
To more than one dimension,
To starving for attention,
Hating convention, hating pretension,
Not to mention of course,
Hating dear old mom and dad
To riding your bike
Midday past the three piece suits-
To fruits- (Noah pointed to Kurt) To no absolutes-
To Absolut- To choice-
To the Village Voice-
To any passing fad
To being an us- For once-
Instead of a them-
ALL
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
(Brittany and Santana were holding each other)
Jesse
AHHEM
Santana
Hey Mister- She's my sister
Waiter
So that's five miso soup,
Four seaweed salad
Three soy burger dinner,
Two tofu dog platter
And one pasta with meatless balls
Finn
Eww
Kurt
It tastes the same
Mercedes
If you close your eyes
Waiter
And thirteen orders of fries
Is that it here?
ALL
Wine and beer!
Rachel & Kurt
To hand-crafted beers made in local breweries
To yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese
To leather, to dildos, To curry Vindaloo
To Huevos Rancheros and Maya Angelou
Finn & Tina
Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion,
Creation, Vacation
Puck
Mucho masturbation
Mercedes & Brittany
Compassion, to fashion, to passion
When it's new
Mike
To Sontag
Artie
To Sondheim
Quinn Blaine Tina Santana
To anything taboo
Sam & Artie
Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham and Cage
Finn
Lenny Bruce
Blaine
Langston Hughes
Rachel
To the stage!
Kurt
To Uta
Mike
To Buddha
Santana
Pablo Neruda, too
Artie & Rachel
Why Dorothy and Toto went over the rainbow
To blow off Auntie Em
ALL
La Vie Boheme
(Santana & Brittany make out)
Jesse
Sisters?
Santana
We're close
(Blaine and kurt kiss)
Blaine & Kurt
Brothers!
All
Bisexuals, trisexuals, Homo Sapiens,
Carcinogens, hallucinogens, men,
Pee Wee Herman
German wine, turpentine, Gertrude Stein
Antonioni, Bertolucci, Kurosawa
Carmina Burana
ALL
To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstasy
Vaclav Havel- The Sex Pistols, 8BC
To no shame- Never playing the fame game
Puck
To marijuana
ALL
To sodomy
It's between God and me
To S & M
Jesse
Waiter...Waiter...Waiter
ALL
La Vie Boheme
Sam
In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromtu salon will commence immediately following dinner...
Brittany S. Priece, clad only in bubble wrap, will perform her famous lawn chair-handcuff dance to the sounds of iced tea being
stirred. (Brittany is dancing)
Puck
And Finn Hudson will preview his new documentary about his inability to hold an erection on high holy days.
Artie
And Rachel Berry, back from her spectacular one-night engagement at the eleventh street lot, will sing Native American
tribal chants backwards through her vocoder, while accompanying herself on the electric cello- Which she has never never studied.
Quinn
And Puck will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song
(Puck picks up a guiter and plays)
Quinn
That doesn't remind us of 'Musetta's
Waltz'
Blaine
Kurt Elizabeth Hummel will model the latest fall fashions from Paris while accompanying himself on the 10-gallon plastic
pickle tub.
Kurt
And Blaine will recount his exploits
as an Anarchist- Including the tale of
his successful reprogramming of the
MIT virtual reality equipment to self-destruct as it broadcasts the words:
ALL
'Actual Reality - Act Up - Fight AIDS!'
Rachel
Excuse me, did I do something wrong?
I get invited, then ignored all night long
Puck
I've been trying, I'm not lying
No one's perfect, I've got baggage
Rachel
Life's too short, babe time is flying
I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine
Puck
I should tell you
Rachel I've got baggage too
Puck I should tell you
Both Baggage
After that we kissed. And we broke apart after hearing the cat calls of our friends.
"Rachel will you be my girl?" Noah whispered to me.
"Yes!" I squealed.
