Key: (For the entire story unless noted otherwise)
Print- regular story line
Italics- Tsubomi's current thoughts
Chapter 1: Keeping Promises (Part 1 of 2)
I woke up uncomfortably as the bittersweet thoughts began to flash through my mind like broken pieces of shredded glass piercing against my skin. The word disappointment was stitched luminously all over my face and the lying in my eyes was inflamed from being struck by the hand of truth. My body felt numb and weak and my breathing became difficult to control, but lamentably it didn't matter now despite my discomfort from the freshly given wounds. Painfully as I started to recollect myself, I couldn't hear the blessed angels that used to sing lovingly above me, but why should they? I had already accepted my incoming fate dismally with wide open arms.
Regrettably, the façade I still held on to proudly was becoming weak. For almost a year, I have kept myself hidden within the shadows for my protection and wasn't honest for the sake of my weak composure. The idea of playing with my inner demons as I let my true colors show was the biggest fear I have been carrying in silence. For the act of love and war, I am torn between right and wrong, is it right to follow the conscience or is it wrong to follow the heart? Indulging myself in a moment of silence, I felt my heart breaking and I could have never imagined it to be the loudest I would ever hear.
I shook away all adverse thoughts and sluggishly started to dress myself into the Spica uniform. After I finished tying up my silver white converse, I walked into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror with a calm smile, I am such a pulchritudinous mess…Not once have I ever liked my reflection, mockingly looking back at me with those eyes showing me the undeniable truth no matter how I was approaching it. Staring sharply at my reflection, I asked myself, "Who are you trying to fool?"
Annoyed by the ongoing emotions and the given obvious silence, I knew the answer. Oh god, I'm a beautiful lie dressed in see through spades, I chuckled at the thought. Suddenly, I felt a profound tear growing inside of my heart as I closed my eyes and replied softly, "Myself…"
It was universally understood that actions speak louder than words, however, it did not guarantee by doing so will one's successes always be blithesome, perhaps to the overall accepting blinded fool. I have been taught by my ryoushin to always follow the conscience and never allow my emotions to falter in with my decisions nor actions. If I allowed my emotions to take control, then my only weakness would be showing my vulnerability against what was considered acceptable and proper as a future potential successor. Even so, I was doing this for her with my heart half empty and there was truly no need for such arduous emotions anyway.
Briskly, I left my dorm room without another moment to spare. I walked up the hall towards the stairs located next to the hallway at the center and climbed up to the third floor. I was rather intrigued by how the pain could have sometimes motivated me into doing things I couldn't have thought possible, if the pain didn't break me first that is. However, as long as I was able to act and not crumble, I could do anything.
Arriving at my destination, I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. Remember who you are doing this for, remember the reason for your actions…Do not get yourself emotionally involved, do what is best and succeed… I will succeed! Failing is not an option... I snapped back from my thoughts as the door opened lazily.
"Good morning Yaya-senpai," I greeted calmly. "Did you sleep well?"
"Good morning Tsubomi-chan," Yaya-senpai greeted back sleepily, stretching her arms above her head and allowing a soft yawn to escape her lips. "I've slept better, but not as if it's going to happen anytime soon by waking up at this ungodly hour thanks to you, you little brat. I don't suppose you didn't already know how wonderful sleep is. Honestly, there must be something wrong with you."
"It's called going to school Yaya-senpai and I don't suppose you didn't already know what THAT is," I laughed, taking a step into Yaya-senpai's dorm room and then taking a seat on her bed. "Besides, if I don't, then who will? You NEVER wake up on time, and I might act like a brat to you, but we both know you're the irresponsible one between us two. If only you weren't so irresponsible, then I wouldn't be here."
"Yeah, yeah as you always say," Yaya-senpai said, rolling her eyes and picking up her Spica uniform from the tail end of her bed. "Anyway, thanks for coming over Tsubomi-chan, I mean, you are a brat, but you can be tolerable when you want to be. Ha, even if I was responsible, I am positive you would still be around me because I am that beautifully hard to resist, and besides, you wouldn't be able to stay away from me if you wanted to in the first place anyway. Accept it Tsubomi-chan, I'm simply irresistible."
"I should have thought of that before," I said sarcastically.
As Yaya-senpai excused herself to the bathroom, I thought about last night when I held her close as she struggled to fall asleep. I was not a bit surprised that the strong and confident senpai could have a heart so fragile like mine, but to be honest, I was surprised at myself for being so gentle and attentive towards her. We are different and yet the same, it seems we both have such prideful personalities we have been using as a shield against our flaws from those around us. We have been taught to never lie and to always be honest, but is honesty truly the best policy? Unless you knew what you were going to lose then I highly doubt it, but in the end we have all gambled somehow. Slowly, I started to recall the events of yesterday's etoile election and the proposition I made to Hikari-senpai...
Author Note: Tsubomi is my main concentration. In the anime, manga, and light novels, she was never a prominent character. With that in mind, I wanted to bring this character towards the light and let her become known. Since I am focusing on her mainly, you will be traveling with her through her struggles and achievements of each obstacle and as well as whom she speaks to (keep in mind readers that anything that happens around our Tsubomi would be possibly unexpected and surprising considering her prior knowledge to those events). This is her story written in 1st person. I will throw in some Yaya p.o.v.'s for understanding, but other than that it's Tsubomi's story. :)
