"What do you mean?" he asked looking up at her, his brows furrowed. Cress took in a deep breath.
"I don't know who I am or where I belong.." she told him. She sat down next to him.
"I feel like I'm still floating around in space in that stupid satellite," a tear fell from her eye as she explained. He wiped the tear away from her cheek with his palm, she leaned her head against his hand.
"Oh stars," Thorne looked up at the ceiling of the rampion, and blinked rapidly so the tears that were building up wouldn't fall. He slid his hand away from her face, but she grasped his hand and took it and held it in her delicate hands.
"Are you breaking up with me Cress?" Thorne asked looking into her eyes intently.
"I love you," Cress stopped and took a sharp inhale.
"I just need to figure some things out," she exhaled.
"I love you," he told her.
"You all seem to have it figured out.. You, Cinder, Kai, Scarlet, Wolf, Jacin, Iko and even Winter. How can you be so sure of everything when you're so young? I don't understand. I feel like there's something I'm missing out on. Something I'm supposed to know that I don't. And I don't understand!" she sobbed.
"Why don't I understand? Is it because I was stuck in that stupid satellite for so long? Is that why?" Cress speculated before continuing.
"Which is why I'm asking you to wait for me. Wait for me until I've figured it out. Will you do that for me? Wait until I know what you know? When I understand what you understand?" she asked urgently.
"Please don't go. Stay," he pleaded, his vision blurry with tears.
"I can help you figure it out whatever it is," Thorne whispered. In response Cress wound her arms around him, he returned her hug. She rested her wet cheek against his shoulder.
"I have to go. This is the kind of thing a person needs to do by themselves. Something just doesn't feel right, and I need to figure things out," her voice choked on the words. She was silent before she finally managed to tell him through her tears:
"Please wait for me Thorne, don't move on."
"I'll wait for you," tears were falling from his eyes rapidly. They let go of each other slowly. Cress stood up, Thorne stood up with her. His body heavy with sorrow.
"You'll come back, right?" he asked her.
"I don't know, I just need to explore the world on my own, explore myself," Cress sniffled.
"I just feel so out of place everywhere I go, so disconnected from the world. I have to land. In order to land, I need to fly, fly on my own."
Cress leaned forward and kissed him on the lips softly, he kissed her back. He stroked her back with his left hand, and brushed her hair with the fingers of the right hand. They broke of the kiss hesitantly.
"Goodbye," Cress whispered against his lips. Thorne sat back down and watched her walk away.
When Cress had left Thorne to go on her big adventure to understand something. She had left somewhere in Asia. Thorne did not know what she was looking for and Cress hadn't seemed to know for sure herself. But she had been very certain that she had to go. The only thing Cress had taken with her was her portscreen. Thorne had tried calling her, however she wasn't answering. What was he supposed to do? Sit around and wait? What else could he do when his heart had been crushed. How would he know if she would come back or if she had left and would never come back. He missed the smell of her and the taste of her lips; he missed her presence. They had had bumps in their relationship before, but this wasn't really a disagreement. He wasn't sure what it was, a break? Probably a break.
"Hello," said Cress's voice from the other side of the portscreen.
"Can you pick me up?" she asked before he had the chance to say anything.
"Of course," Thorne responded. Cress sent him the address and then she hung up.
She had been gone for a month, she hadn't said anything to him in that month. A month wasn't really that long, but it felt like forever. Now he would finally see her again.
She stood in front of him.
"I missed you," she whispered.
"I missed you too," he told her and closed the space between them with a hug.
"Where were you?" he asked. Cress broke of the hug and sat down. She gestured for him to sit down next to her, so he did.
"I went to Luna," she avoided eye contact with him when he asked why.
"I thought that maybe if I found my mom, I would feel connected to the world again somehow. I thought that she loved me just as much as dad. Well turns out she's still alive and she hates me," Cress's voice chocked on the last three words.
"I'm so sorry Cress," Thorne put an arm around her to soothe her. Cress wiped away her tears quickly.
"I know now what I was looking for, I understand now. I was looking for a home. A physical place to call home. However I realized something. Home isn't a place, home is a feeling."
"I belong with you Thorne, when I'm with you I'm ho-" he interrupted her with a kiss. She kissed him back.
"Thank you for waiting," she said against his lips.
Author's note: I don't know how I feel about this.. I don't know I'm just being my usual self and doubting my writing or if this fic is just not that great.. I feel like it's the latter. I also feel like Cress would probably go on some kind of adventure to find herself since she has been trapped in a satellite her whole life and she's only sixteen... Idk please give me some constructive criticism. I'd appreciate positive too, if you have anything positive to say about this.
