Story: KoF: The King Of Fighters News At Five Remastered
Author: Master Jin Sonata
Written: July 2007
Remastered: July 22nd, 2016
Genre: Humor
Rating: T (Language and Goofy Violence)
Disclaimer: I do not own SNK, or its kooky cast of characters.
The scene opens with two anchors sitting behind the counter in the newsroom of Geese Tower. The program was about to begin.
"Live at Geese Tower, the only reliable news program in South Town, this is The King Of Fighters News At Five!"
"Hello and welcome to The King Of Fighters News At Five. I'm lead anchor Rugal Bernstein."
"And I'm his co-anchor, King."
"Tonight we bring you breaking news on top of this very tower. Geese Howard, the rich and powerful businessman and so-called owner of this city, is currently in a violent conflict with his arch rival, Terry Bogard," Rugal says.
"Let's now go to action reporter May Lee, who's on the rooftop with live footage on this incident," King says.
On The Rooftop of Geese Tower
The camera then shows May Lee standing in the foreground of the roof, while a raging battle between Geese and Terry ensues behind her.
"Thank you, King. As you can see, these two men are in a heated battle with one another. No one knew for sure how this incident started, until I asked a local bystander," May Lee says, walking over to Billy who wasn't too far from her. "So tell us again, sir, how did this fight get started in the first place?"
"Well, Geese killed Terry's father, and Terry wants to get revenge by killing Geese. Pretty simple concept if you ask me," Billy responds, looking into the camera.
"Interesting. But isn't this a dangerous place to be fighting? I mean, those two are awfully close to the edge of this fifty-story building," May Lee says to Billy.
"Don't ask me, ask them!" Billy responds.
"You heard the bystander, folks. So now I will go up to one of the men and try to warn them of the dangerous area they are fighting at," May Lee says, as she and the camera man walks over to Geese, who had just been pushed toward the edge of the building by Terry's Power Wave.
Geese looks over at May Lee who stopped in front of him.
"What the hell are you doing here? Can't you see that I'm in the middle of an epic ba-" Geese says angrily to May Lee, but was cut off when Terry performed his famous Buster Wolf move on him, sending Geese flying off of the tower. May Lee and the camera man look over the edge of the building to see Geese hit the ground with a crash, only to get up unharmed and walk away from the scene in a huff.
"Uh…this has been action news reporter May Lee reporting, back to you." May Lee says, trailing off as she witnessed the event that just happened.
Back In The Newsroom
"Thank you, May Lee. Next on tonight's news, we bring you two reports coming from South Town's county Hospital," Rugal says.
"Here's what we know about the first incident: The police are on the lookout for a deadbeat boyfriend who ran from the city hospital screaming when he received news that his girlfriend was pregnant. The woman, a resident Shiranui Ninja, wants the citizens of South Town to keep their eyes peeled for this man," King says, showing a photo of Andy Bogard.
"The second incident takes place inside the hospital's Operating Room. We now take you there live as health reporter Benimaru Nikaido has the latest updates. Benimaru?" Rugal says.
Inside South Town Hospital's Operating Room
The camera shows Benimaru flirting with Nurse Angel about the patient, K9999, who just undergone surgery.
"Psst you're on!" the camera man whispered to Benimaru.
"Oh?…Oh! Whoops, heheh…ahem. Here in the Operating Room, this man lying in here on the bed has just undergone intensive surgery to seal a rare condition in his arm called 'Sudden Arm Mutation Syndrome'. Nurse Angel has told me that the patient will be fine after some rest," Benimaru says.
"That's right! It wasn't easy, but doctors were able to get it all under control," Nurse Angel says. "Oh look, the patient is waking up from his drug induced comma. It took 47 doses of our strongest pills to put him out, and I m shocked that it didn't kill him."
The camera pans over to K9999, who woke up yawning and looking around wondering what the hell was going on.
"Who are these people?" K9999 asks Nurse Angel.
"These are just the nice reporters filming part of your remarkable recovery," Nurse Angel replied. "Oh, by the way, here's your bill for the operation," she added, handing K9999 a slip of paper.
K9999 reads the bill, and immediately turns beet red from looking at the price he'd have to pay.
"FORTY THOUSAND FRICKEN DOLLARS!" K9999 yells in anger, his operated arm shaking and bulging violently.
"Uh oh…uh sir, you shouldn't get so angry like that…your arm needs to time recover…" Angel tried to say, but it was too late.
K9999's operated arm explodes to an enormous size as the hideously mutated arm waves around the room, knocking over everything as K9999 curses out in anger about the bill.
"Um…this was Benimaru Nikaido reporting. Back to you guys…" Benimaru says to the camera, before K9999 knocks that over as well, the signal breaking up before going completely black.
Back In The Newsroom
"Thank you Benimaru…I think…" Rugal says, both he and King with sweat drops on their foreheads.
"Right…before we go to a commercial, let's have a quick look at the weather with our Meteorologist: Kyo Kusanagi. Kyo, how's the weather look for this week?" King asks.
"It's going to be hot. Feel the burn?" Kyo says as he points to the map of South Town, showing it will by ninety degrees tomorrow.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Shingo bursts into the newsroom and runs up to Kyo, hugging him around the waist.
"KYO-SAN! YOU'RE MY IDOL! COME HOME AND HAVE DINNER WITH ME!" Shingo whines to Kyo.
"Ugh! Shingo! Get off of me! Can't you see I'm busy?!" Kyo says angrily to Shingo, trying to pry him off from around him, only to stumbled backwards and fall down to the ground, ripping the weather map off the wall in the process.
Rugal and King looked at each other, before facing the camera.
"We'll be right back after this short commercial break…" Rugal says, embarrassed at what just happened.
Continue on to the next chapter!
