I only have eyes for you

She sat, alone in their house, contemplating his cruel departure from the world, her world. Cradling her beer in one hand and a photo frame in the other she silently let the tears fall. She remembered, smiling grimly, the subject of the photo. Their seventh wedding anniversary. Placing the bottle on the coffee table in front of her, she fiddled with the two delicate rings on her left hand. Taking a trip down memory lane, recalling the moment, nine and a half years ago, when he had finally decided he didn't want to be too late.


"What do you want, Grissom?" Sara said, opening her apartment door to be greeted by Gil Grissom, dressed in a tuxedo and wielding a bouquet of ten red roses behind his back. She herself was dressed in jeans and a tank top.

"Can I come in? Please. There are things that need to be said." He said. She was never able to say no to him. She turned back to her kitchen and he shut the door behind him.

"Well?" she said, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. "What do you want? You look like you've just come from a dinner party or something."

A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he spoke. "I haven't. First of all, I would like to apologise to you for being a complete ass all these years." He noted the stunned look on her face and it gave him confidence to continue. "I've pushed you away far too many times and I thank the Gods that you've stayed in Vegas as long as you have." She smiled slightly and Grissom stepped forwards. "Secondly," he pulled the bouquet from behind his back and extended it to her. "I want to give you these. As I sign of apology."

Sara took the roses from him and smiled wider. "They're beautiful, Griss. Thank you."

"I'm not done yet. I want to confess something to you, Sara, before it's too late." He looked into her eyes and she understood his meaning. "There are ten roses." He pointed to the bouquet. "Nine real and one made of silk." He stepped forwards so they were barely inches apart. "Sara," she was staring at the roses but he lifted her chin with his finger so she was looking at him. "I love you." Her eyes grew wide and he cupped her cheek. "I've loved you since we first met. I will love you until the last rose loses it's petals, I love you with all my heart and soul and I will love you with my last breath. Please Sara, tell me it's not too late." He rested his forehead on hers and breathed in the smell that was Sara.


She had moved into his townhouse three months later and they were engaged within a year. She remembered the looks on everyone's faces when they had told them they were dating, had moved in together and expected them all to be at the wedding in two months. Classic. She remembered the wedding, it had been beautiful. It had not been a big ceremony, just close friends. They had read their own vows and the moment she was pronounced Mrs. Gilbert Grissom was, without doubt, the happiest moment of her life. The reception afterwards had been excellent. Grissom had been taking dancing lessons so he wouldn't embarrass Sara. They had picked a song each for their first dance. Grissom had picked 'Heaven' by Brian Adams and Sara had picked 'Every time we touch' by Cascada (A/N: the slow version, it's a wedding not a disco!). Grissom had surprised her even further with what he did next.


"Gil, where are we?" Sara asked as their wedding car pulled up outside a large house, away from the strip. "I thought we were booked in The Bellagio?" he just smiled. The chauffeur opened the door and helped Sara out. Grissom got out behind her and hugged her from behind.

"We were never booked in The Bellagio. I just said that to throw you off the scent." He kissed her neck and whispered. "Welcome home Mrs. Grissom." He said and pulled her towards the door.

"A house! Our house? This is ours?" she smiled and yelped as he picked her up once the door was open.

"


She smiled and picked up the silk rose that rested on a shelf of their book case. She hugged it to her chest and more tears fell. He had died last Saturday morning. It had been both their days off but he had been called in because of…


"…bugs honey, I'm sorry. Brass called me. I know it's our day off…"

"Our first day off in weeks I might add." She said, sulking from her seat on the couch. Grissom smiled and sat down beside her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling Sara onto his lap.

"I know sweetheart." He kissed her neck. "I can't help being an extremely smart and talented can I?" he trailed kisses along her neck and her collar bone.

"And sexy." She mumbled and jumped off his lap leaving him pouting. "What? You think I'd let you start something you wouldn't finish? Dream on hubby!" she giggled and tapped his arm. "Now go, work that voodoo that you do so well and maybe, just maybe, we can continue this later on. If you bring me food that is."

He got up and grabbed her waist, kissed her one long, hard last time and smiled. "I'll see you later." He walked to the door and stepped outside, but turned back to her before he closed it. "Sara?" he called her. "I love you."

She smiled widely at him. "We love you too." He returned her smile, and walked away for the last time.

"Did you bring me some food?" she asked, opening the door and expecting to see Grissom standing on the porch. Instead, she met a distraught Nick. Tears were running down his face and it shocked Sara. "Nick! Oh my God, what's wrong? Are you ok?"

Nick just stood there, staring at her, before he pulled her into a bone crushing hug. "Nick! Hey!" she pushed away from him and stared. "What's going on? Talk to me Nick! Now! You're scaring me."

"I think you should sit down." Nick managed to say.

"Nick!"

"Please Sara. You should really sit down." He wiped away more tears from his eyes as she let him in and they sat down on the couch.

"Ok, we're sat down, now tell me what's going on before I wail on you!" she smirked at him, trying to lighten the mood. A hint of a smile flashed over Nick's face before vanishing again.

"Sara, something happened today, at the scene."

"What happened? Is everyone alright?"

"Sara." Nick placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her rambling. "It was just Greg and Grissom at the scene. He was bent over examining the body, the cop was a rookie and hadn't cleared the scene. The owner of the house had killed the guy, he came out of a room and met Greg in the hallway. He had a gun. Aimed it a Greg. Grissom walked out to talk to him about the case and…" Nick fell silent.

"And what Nick?" Sara said, not noticing her own tears and banishing the thoughts that had flooded her brain that she knew could not be true. "And what Nick!?" she shouted.

Nick turned to her and took her hand. "I'm sorry, darlin', he's gone." He sobbed.

"No." Sara gasped, her hand flew to her mouth. "No, he can't be. He's only going to be a little while, it's our day off, he's bringing dinner. NO!" she broke down and grasped Nick as he hugged her.

"


Sara and Nick met the rest of the team at the hospital as they were waiting for Greg to come out from getting stitches. The bullet that had tore through Grissom's heart had gone through Greg's shoulder before he shot the suspect, emptying his magazine into him.

Catherine, Warrick and Brass saw Sara and Nick approach and greeted them. Everyone, including Brass, was crying.

"Sara, I'm sorry I didn't get there in time." Brass said as he pulled her into his arms. "I'm so sorry Sara." He repeated it.

"It's not your fault Brass." She said. "You couldn't have known the perp would still be in the house or what would happen." She smiled grimly and addressed the group. "How's Greg?"

"He's getting stitches." Warrick said. "He wants to see you." He pointed to the door Greg was behind and she walked through it.

"Sara." Greg jumped off the bed.

"Greg, are you ok?" she asked, embracing him.

"You shouldn't be worried about me." Greg let go of her and sat back down on the bed. "It's my fault he's gone."

"No it's not Greg. You didn't shoot him."

"I practically did!" he said hysterically. "I called him to come look at something just before that guy came out of hiding. He pulled the trigger just as Grissom walked out of the kitchen. I tried to stop the bleeding but I couldn't. I watched him die."

"It's still not your fault Greg." She said, sitting next to him and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Please, don't blame yourself, it'll eat you up inside." They sat there for a few minutes before Sara got off the bed and walked away.

"Sara?" she turned to face him again. "He said something, before he…he wanted me to tell you something, but I don't understand. He said 'until the last petal falls'. Does that mean anything to you?"


It had been a beautiful funeral, she thought. Everyone from the crime lab had been there, even Ecklie, and some people from colleges and universities he had taught at over the years, but no family. It seemed his family at the lab really was his family. She had begun to show her pregnancy by this time and everyone had consoled her. Sara had read a poem she remembered from when she was young, but couldn't remember where from.


"I thought of you with love today but that is nothing new
I thought about you yesterday and days before that too,
I think of you in silence I often speak your name
All I have are memories and your picture in a frame
Your memory is my keepsake with which I'll never part
God has you in His keeping I have you in my heart."

Everyone from the nightshift had talked about Grissom, praising his work, speaking of the great things he had done. It had been his wish to be cremated should the worst happen and as he disappeared through the curtain, 'If I saw you in heaven' by Eric Clapton played.

Rejecting many offers of company, she went home to an empty house, taking him with her. She had sat on the sofa and that is where she had stayed, replaying memories of a happier time and mourning her loss.

"Why did you leave me Gil?" she whispered into the darkness. "We were so happy, why did you have to go?"

"I'm sorry Sara." His voice was soft beside her and she spun around. He was there, sat next to her.

"Gil?" he looked so solid, but there was an eerie kind of glow surrounding him. "Are you real?"

He lifted a hand and placed it on her cheek. He was still warm. "I'm trapped, Sara. In limbo. I had to say goodbye."

"I miss you." She sobbed, hugging him.

"I know honey." He stroked her hair and kissed her cheek. "But you need to stay strong, for the baby. I know it's hard, it was so hard leaving you, but don't mourn me. Just think about the times we were together, not the time we are apart."

Sara nodded and kissed him. "I love you Gil. I will always love you. I'll love you with my last breath."

Grissom picked up the silk rose and handed it to her. "Until the last petal falls sweetheart. Goodbye." He stood up and walked to the door. "I love you." And he disappeared.


Seven months later, Michael Gil Grissom was brought into the world. He was the spitting image of his father. Baby blue eyes and curly brown hair, but with Sara's smile. Nick, Warrick and Brass had all become proud uncle's while Catherine and Greg were godparents. Sara stood out on the balcony of the house, cradling her son in her arms and starring at the stars.

"Gil, this is your son, Michael. He looks like you so much. If this is what you looked like as a baby I'm surprised you weren't eaten up." She smiled. "He's going to be a great man, just like you. He's going to know who his daddy is and how much he would have loved him. We both love you, Gil, and we miss you, but I have thousands of memories to share with Michael." The baby stirred and Sara wrapped the blanket around him tighter. "I only have eyes for you and now I'm happy again. Goodbye my love." She turned and walked into the house, closing the balcony doors behind her.

Far above the world, Gil Grissom smiled down on his family.

"Until the last petal falls."

The End


This story was inspired by watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer at 4 in the morning (insomnia rules!). If you are familiar with the programme, the title is an actual episode, it's the one where the ghost of a high school student from 1955 is haunting the school, replaying the moment when he killed his teacher and lover, then killed himself. Obviously, I changed it slightly, but that's what inspired it. Did ya love it or hate it? Either way, thanks for reading!