She lay in front of him motionless. He found himself standing and staring all the knowledge he spent so long amassing seemed to count for nothing, he couldn't move he just stared down at her. She was covered in blood, she'd tried to stop them tried to stand between them and the transported but they'd over powered her. She'd fought she was a fighter she'd taken out almost twenty before she'd been rushed, there were just to many of them they'd made him listen to her screams.

'Nelia.' Her name escaped his lips as he slipped down onto his knees. He was numb it wasn't real it couldn't be real. Tentatively he reached out brushing his hand across the fabric of her shoulder she was still warm.

'Nelia, Nelia!' He pulled her limp body into his arms onto his lap.

He'd seen his fair share of bodies over his time in command but something struck him about her she was different, almost as if...

'Nelia, Nelia listen to me you can't go you can't go like this not like this.' He lifted up her head he face was spattered with blood her thick curly auburn hair was darker and matted down. Her last words not the one in his arms the other one her Mother her last words they were ringing in his ears, she was special there was something different about her.

His hands moved across her body and then he found it the twisted piece of metal it was buried deep in the back of her neck, it must have cut her spinal cord.

'Nelia this is your Captain I am ordering you,' The metal twisted loose in his hand, he lifted her up his mouth meeting her ear.

'...I am ordering you to live Nelia Hunter.' It only took a matter of moments as soon as the metal was dislodged she seemed to burst back into life her chest heaving as she fought for breath.

They had made a concious effort never to talk about what had happened on that day again, she had received her commendation for bravery and her promotion and they'd both moved on, but it wasn't as easy as that. He couldn't forget it and he had the distinct feeling that neither could she, something had changed between them forever.

'So you've finally decided to wake up then?' He grinned he'd been watching her sleep for what seemed like hours. Her green eyes fluttered open as she raised her slender arms above her head stretching a lazy grin of contentment gracing her features.

'I'm just following the example set by my superiors.' She giggled playfully pulling him into a warm kiss, he pulled away from her with a chuckle.

'Huh I can't remember the last time I had a lie in.' He mused to himself idly as he slipped the old grey t-shirt he always slept in back over his head. She moved behind him her arms suddenly slipping around his waist.

'So lay in.' She giggled as her warm mouth enclosed on the edge of his ear. She would never know how hard it was for him to pull away from her.

'Come back to bed.' She pleaded as he turned around to face her cupping his hand under her chin he placed a kiss on the tip of her nose.

'Don't give me that look Wesley Crusher.' She pouted playfully stealing a quick kiss from his open mouth.

'I just need to check in besides you should have some news coming your way today I can check your inbox at the same time.' Slipping out of his touch she rolled onto her slim stomach kicking her legs up behind her crossing them.

'Don't use me as an excuse for your obsessive behaviour. You know you're actually meant to leave the ship on shore leave.' She frowned struggling to hide her resentment.

'Don't start this don't spoil things your to old for tantrums.' Wes teased defusing the situation slapping her on the behind.

'Hey, that really hurt!' An indignant cry escaped her lips, he couldn't help but grin as he left their bedroom.

Nelia rolled from her front onto her back with a sigh she played with a stray tendril of hair pushing it and pulling it between her long slender fingers as her mind wandered. He'd never said anything he must have known, must have guessed but maybe he just never had it was probably the last thought that would ever cross his mind...she never wanted him to know. If he knew things would change he'd look at her differently he might even...hate her. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut at the thought she could bare anything else but not that, she couldn't stand the thought of him ever hatting her. Her eyes opened again she glanced down at her hand the diamond on it glinting back at her taunting her she could never forget as long as that sat on her finger they were on a clock. Now that they were engaged the days and hours were ticking by she couldn't marry him with a lie on her lips. She found herself torn between sublime happiness and desperate misery at the thought of his reaction. In her heart she already knew the outcome she knew she'd lose him forever if she ever told him she was a...

'Nelia it's here, it came early!' His voice rocked her out of her dreaming, twisting her body she stared up at him.

'Were you asleep again?' Nelia shook her head.

'No I was just thinking.' She breathed her just suddenly heavy.

'Well you can stop thinking because it's here you can finally know.' Wes pushed the PAD excitedly into her face. She frowned at it for a few seconds.

'Your terrified right I know how you feel but trust me I have a good feeling about this.' He sat down on the bed next to her smiling enthusiastically, this was the first time she'd even thought about which ship she would be assigned to everything she'd hoped for in the past seemed to be blown out of the water in front of her when he'd asked her to marry him, there was only one thing she wanted now.

'Nelia you can't brush this off the suspense is killing me.' Absent-mindedly she scrolled down the screen only half taking on-board the information as she read it. Sitting on the bed studying her face for the smallest of changes Wes' heart began to sink he'd never prepared for the eventuality that the news might have been bad, he built it up so much that he had no contingency plan if the worst happened. She sat up suddenly animated.

'Is it bad?' He frowned, she didn't answer him.

'Nelia if it's not your first choice you know that's okay you're young, the youngest Captain ever to be sworn in this is just a jumping off point.' Wes frowned he couldn't reach her she still wasn't listening she was just staring.

'You did get a ship right it's not a space station is it?' The snob in him suddenly slipped out it seemed to snap her out of her trance, she glanced at him and frowned.

'There must be some kind of mistake, they've made a mistake Wes.'

'Is it that bad?' Part of him wanted to just snatch the PAD away from her and read it himself but he knew he had to wait she had to tell him the news herself.

'They don't make mistakes on these things generally but if you really think somethings gone wrong somewhere down the line I can speak to Admiral Picard I'm sure he'd pull some strings for us. How far down your list is it?'

'It's not even on my list there's no way this can be right, it just can't.' The PAD slipped out of her hand and Wes caught it scrolling down the screen it was his turn to be shocked.

'The Enterprise.' He swallowed the breath almost leaving his body.

The Enterprise.