Go On

Summary: Sometimes Nobu, when I think of you, of us it makes my heart swell, but other times it hurts too much to go on. HachixNobu

Disclaimer: I do not own Nana or any of its characters.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here I am, in the house on shirogane lane. It's three months after the little girl inside of me was due. Now we'll never know, Nobu, whether it was yours… or his. I can imagine your expression now. It's a tortured one, full of pain, but also it seems vaguely wistful. If I had had that baby and it was his but I had stayed with you, would you have loved her just the same? I suppose. And as I sit in the comfortable home your rival has provided, and write this letter I wonder if it'll do any good. I have a burning question inside that only you can answer, Nobu.

Is it as hard for you?

Can you find the strength to go on?

I suppose that life's composed of many 'What If's'.

What if you had been the one to reassure me?

What If you were still by my side?

What If you still loved me?

What If I still had the baby?

What If he never happened?

What If she was gone?

I tried so hard to have a healthy baby Nobu, I really did, and the miscarriage still happened. Was it the demon King? Or was it fate?

Tonight I'm leaving this home I made for the baby, and returning to room 707, the closest thing I have to a home now. Maybe I'll see you at the festival of lights. Or maybe you slip away once again.

The divorce papers have already gone through. Now you're the only man in my heart.

I don't have much more to say. I'll move on, carry on, go on, for now, but only because of the lingering image of your smile.

And of a summer so perfect.

And of Strawberry glasses

And of the man that I will always love. ( That's the role you play. )

Love from and for always,

Nana Komatsu