Chapter 1: Chapter 1
Disclaimer: I do not own SNK or the characters involved.
A/N: Hope you enjoy, this is my first attempt at writing a fanfic.
Everything seemed slow to Mikasa. When she would walk her whole body felt weightless, her surroundings were non-existent, and if it weren't for Eren pulling her towards the wagon she more than likely would have stood the whole night staring at her home . . . well what use to be home.
Eren had graciously offered Mikasa their home and while the offer was attractive she could not help but still feel hollow inside. As they were riding back to Shiganshina Mikasa sat across from Eren and since they have got on the wagon neither of them have said a word.
She could not help it, given any other circumstance she would have politely introduced herself and been overly courteous. But it wouldn't be like that anymore.
Within a few hours Mikasa had lost her family, due to the high demand for a female oriental in human trafficking, and all she could do was pity herself. But as she recalled the memories of earlier that day, she could not help but feel a small ray of happiness.
When all seemed to be lost she was rescued by Dr. Jaeger's son. Granted, anyone would prefer not to be put under the grave circumstances she was in but Mikasa could not help but feel happy to be rescued.
However, immediately after the thought of never being able to see her parents again, she nuzzled her face in the thick confines of Eren's red scarf.
"Mikasa?"
Hesitating, barley looking up, she responded, "y-yes . . ."
"Everything is going to be okay now, we'll take care of you", Eren told her as sweetly as he could.
She looked away, "I know".
Doing his best to be optimistic he retorted, "You'll really learn to like Shiganshina. I'll introduce you to Armin too!"
"Who is Armin?" she asked still not giving eye contact to the boy.
"He's my best friend, and I'm sure he'll be really excited to get to know you."
Mikasa nodded still observing the floor doing her best not to give direct eye contact to either of the Jaegers'. She just wasn't in the mood to have a light conversation about future plans with meeting new people. As being an only child living in a secluded house she understood the troubles of not having anyone her age to communicate with.
She should feel happy, right? A new adventure, where she will now become a part of civilization and begin new friendships, she might never have a time where she would feel lonely.
No.
This was not the future she wanted. She couldn't help but wish that she would wake up any moment now in her own room, smelling a warm breakfast being prepared by her mom, and her dad telling stories about his small shop. Slowly, she closed her eyes as hard as possible.
This is a dream, it has to be, the moment I open my eyes, I'll wake up.
She opened them, and of course she didn't wake up. This was reality; the days where she was in a loving warm family were gone. She had no family, no friends, and her dreams: growing up with her family, finding a husband who loves her, and creating a family of her own would never happen.
She was now alone, and more than likely, she would be unable to fill the empty void that was in her heart. She couldn't breath because there was too much pressure developing in her chest; she felt nauseous, her stomach twisted, and her vision began to get hazy.
Mikasa attempted to hold back her tears, but it was going to come out completely involuntary. She made a slight whimper and shed a tear.
"Mikasa, everything will be ok-"
A firm, deep voice cut him off, "Eren."
Eren turned to his father and once they held eye contact Mr. Jaeger slowly moved lower to face Eren and told him in secret "I know you want to cheer her up, but let her vent. She lost her family Eren. Give her time and patience right now."
He could not believe what he just heard his father say. Leave Mikasa alone? How could he say that? Eren grumped and faced the other way. All he wanted to do was comfort her.
Isn't that what anyone would want when they have experienced a tragedy? Someone who would comfort them and let them know everything will be okay? Eren was not going to have any of that nonsense.
He was going to continue to talk to Mikasa. His head shot up ready to start a conversation. Then he noticed it, how she was looking at the floor with no expression, eyes empty, and her pale complexion seemingly even paler. That's it. Everything is not okay.
How could he expect her to be happy? How could he have not put into consideration that everything held dear to her has vanished?
From that moment, Eren decided his father was right in this case. Let Mikasa have her privacy; he will let her "vent" . . . but only for now. He will make sure she has a friend, someone who understands her, cares for her; to make sure she is living. Yeah, everything is not okay but after this- I will be there for you, Mikasa.
"He did what?"
She stood up abruptly pushing back the chair with such a force it made a screeching noise from the friction. In the next second she was gripping Grisha's shoulders with a sheer force that left her knuckles white.
Grisha responded immediately to her sudden outburst, "Sh . . . not so loud. Mikasa is in Eren's room."
"But Eren is just a boy! What was he thinking? He could have got himself killed!" She pushed Grisha away roughly; her whole body was stiff from anger.
"I know, I told him the same thing once I found out . . ."Mr. Jaeger looked subconsciously away from Carla. He couldn't believe it himself. His son without any regard to his own safety just brutally murdered two men. Granted, it was to save a little girl but nonetheless, as a father, it was rather unsettling.
"That boy, he just doesn't get it! He is always fighting with others. Never listening to anything we tell him, only thinking about himself and never considering the consequences. "
"Carla. . .", he said in a defeated tone.
But she wasn't having any of it, "No, you're always defending him!"
"But-"
Her voice became unsteady and high pitched, "I said no! Don't you care about your son's life! Don't you get it? He could have die-"
"He wanted to save her," he countered back.
"What?" Her body felt numb and she herself was taken back by her husband's words.
"I told him you know? How he could have got himself seriously hurt, and how reckless his actions were. I was mad, just like you are now. Until he told me "I wanted to save her as soon as I could".
Carla sat back down in the kitchen chair prompting her elbows on the table so her hands could support her head.
This was both mentally and physically exhausting. How can a regular doctor's visit end up becoming a disaster? What was going to happen now that Eren has given up on his innocence so easily? Her little boy single handedly murdered two people.
She sighed, "What's the girls name again?"
Both of them have regained their composure, which then he answered, "Mikasa Ackerman."
Leaning her chin on her right hand she exhaled, "I feel horrible. All I could think about was Eren and his own life. I forgot about her. Poor girl, she lost her parents and all I could think about are my own feelings."
"It's natural Carla, he is our son. I probably should have asked before I offered her our home, but from my knowledge the Ackerman's have no other relatives." Grisha observed his wife with the utmost care.
Withdrawing her hand from her face and regaining her posture she confidently told Grisha, "My answer would have been yes anyways. Of course she can stay, we will do our best to make her feel welcomed."
Both of them sat in silence for the next few minutes digesting all of the events that happened throughout the day. Finally coming to terms that all of their lives have taken a dramatic turn and how it won't be the same anymore.
Carla and Grisha will now have to see that their son has grown up too fast, seeing the cruelty in the world and having to become a monster in order to save someone. Mikasa, a little girl who has lost everything now has to start her life with complete strangers.
"I think Eren is very fond of Mikasa", Grisha said at an attempt to lighten the mood.
"Huh", she was a bit lost.
With a light smile he clarified, "He wouldn't take his eyes off her the whole ride back. Like he was analyzing her . . . it was odd considering he doesn't care for anyone his own age, besides Armin."
Keeping eye contact she answered, "He probably feels sorry for her, I know I do, she is living a horrible nightmare."
"You're probably right. I just can't help but feel, even though all the odds are against them, that this is the start of new friendship."
Carla couldn't help but smile.
Eren and Mikasa turned to his bedroom door after hearing a loud skidding noise.
Then the noise was accompanied by familiar mumbling noises. Of course, it was his parents probably arguing over him like they tend to after he has "misbehaved".
Usually this wouldn't startle him as such but considering the events from earlier today he still felt on edge. Mikasa on the other hand looked terrified as she was clutching on the end of the bed like she was holding on to dear life.
Eren calmly told her, "Those are just my parents. After I do something without really thinking they get mad at me."
"You do this often?" She asked while gradually softening her grip on the bed.
Scratching the top of his head and looking towards the ceiling he responded, "Um, well probably more than I should but mom is usually the one who gets mad".
"Thank you" . . . for not really thinking.
"For what?"
Her head shifted towards the floor and said in a whimper, "Eren . . ."
Dammit. Eren has done his best to talk with Mikasa at her own pace and not to mention anything that could cloud her thoughts by painful memories. He couldn't help but crease his eyebrows.
After all his attempts most of them seem to be futile. He didn't know what to do. Sternly, he responded "You don't have to thank me anymore, once was enough."
Mikasa nodded with an actual feeling of endearment. At first sight, she thought he was someone who was composed all the time and serious.
But spending time listening to the boy speak; she noticed he has a lot of heart, enthusiastic about almost everything, and can be a little silly or dense? No, has to be silly.
Eren jumped off the bed and headed towards the closet. After rummaging around, he pulled out a few blankets and brightly said "Alright, so I'll sleep on the floor tonight and you can have the bed".
Mikasa's eyes popped wide open, "I couldn't! I'm the guest. I'll sleep on the floor".
Rolling his eyes at her he countered, "Mikasa, I'm sleeping on the floor. It's okay, I really don't mind".
"I'm sleeping on the floor". She jumped off the bed and snatched the blankets from Eren and was about to lay one on the ground until she felt Eren's hand pull her shoulder until they were face to face.
He couldn't believe it. Why couldn't she just take the nice gesture and sleep on the bed? "Just sleep on the bed! I want you to be comfortable."
"I'm not going to be comfortable with you sleeping on the floor when you could be on the bed. If you sleep on the floor; I will sleep there with you too!" He couldn't believe it before but now he was in shock.
Mikasa was barley even talking and here she is being assertive and showing how humble she is, or stubborn! Whichever it was he hadn't decided yet. But one thing was for sure, Eren Jaeger never backed down from a challenge.
Boldly, he asked, "So, if I sleep on the bed will you sleep there too?"
In that instant, Mikasa could feel all the blood rushing to her face and her whole body felt slightly warm.
In the instant after, Eren felt a slight blush rising on his cheeks too. His previous words barley registering.
Finally, in a barley audible whisper she finally said "yeah".
I really need to start thinking before I do something. Eren wasn't going to back down now, he was not going to be defeated that just wasn't his role in life. And he definitely is going to show Mikasa he is a person of his word.
With all the courage he could muster he said, "Alright then, lets go to sleep then".
He grabbed the sheets from Mikasa and spread them out in the bed before settling underneath the covers. Mikasa was still in shock. I'm going to sleep next to a boy. But Eren interrupted her thoughts, "Well?"
Mikasa nodded and settled underneath the sheets a few inches away from him. He then used a candlesnuffer to extinguish the candlelight and everything went pitch black.
Maybe it was because she couldn't see Eren anymore, or the dark setting that reminded her how grim this day really was but all she could do was remember everything vividly.
Mikasa couldn't hold it any longer and she began to cry. It was like all those feelings she was suppressing were all coming back to life. The pain was unbearable; it was all in her head, yet it was affecting her whole body.
She could feel herself uncontrollably shake. Her body felt cold and she just felt so sad.
Eren couldn't handle it. Hearing her soft mumbled pain echo throughout his room was unbearable. But he didn't know what to do! His dad told him to let her "vent" to giver her patience and time. But why is it so hard? Why does it feel so wrong to just hear her and not do anything? How does his dad expect him to just ignore her?
Dammit all to hell.
Suddenly, Mikasa felt an arm wrapping around her waist. She gasped not expecting the sudden contact and her body tensed. Eren, trying his best not to make her angry slowly moved toward her so he could be comfortable.
He felt Mikasa's body loosen to his touch and knew it was a silent permission for the small contact. Her whimpers eventually died down and she finally felt her exhaustion from the day weigh on her. She closed her eyes and fell to a deep sleep; one she desperately needed.
Eren was still awake but could somehow feel when Mikasa fell to unconscious sleep. He was glad he was able to help. He didn't know what to tell her considering he didn't understand her pain.
All he could think at the moment was how to make her happy without making her uncomfortable or being insensitive towards her feelings. He acted on impulse, like he usually does, and hugged her.
He had to admit it felt nice to be able to comfort and help her. Eventually, he would make sure things are okay for her; he will be there for her.
Maybe not really thinking isn't that bad after all.
She didn't really know what to say. What was there to say?
From all the things she expected to see, she didn't expect to see this. But here it was with sunlight shining into Eren's room. Bright and clear was Mikasa, the new girl of the house, tucked in between Eren's arms, as they were both deeply asleep.
Carla had to admit, the sight was beautiful, and both of them experienced quite a traumatic scene the day before, yet they seemed so calm in their sleep. She closed the door.
I'll let them wake up on their own. As she swiftly walked towards the kitchen she couldn't stop the smile from escaping from her lips.
Grisha couldn't help but notice the difference in his wife's appearance in which he asked, "What's so interesting?"
Carla didn't respond to Grisha's comment because she was still in complete thought over the duo. And quiet impatient he announced in a higher voice "Carla?"
Immediately she turned, "What is it?"
He asked with a larger curiosity than before, "You didn't answer me earlier, what is so interesting that has you so deep in thought?"
Rushing over to his side with such enthusiasm she whispered in a knowingly tone, "When I went to wake the kids up, I found Eren and Mikasa huddled in the bed together".
"They slept together?" he questioned astonished.
Clapping her hands together she responded in a giggle, "They did."
Shaking his head he couldn't believe what he was hearing, "Ah . . . leave it to Eren. He probably didn't want to sleep on the floor. It would have been more gentlemen like if he offered to let her sleep on the bed and him on the floor."
Carla playfully pushed his shoulder, "Let them be Grisha, they're just kids. Let them live carefree for now."
He sighed and nodded. True, they deserve to be happy.
Mikasa had no idea how she ended up between Eren's arms. She honestly didn't mean to, it was an accident! Doing her best to remember the night before she tracked her thoughts: I was facing away from him and he moved closer and wrapped one arm around my waist then . . . ugh!
Everything else was a blur- she just remembers feeling incredibly depressed with a pain in her chest and Eren then surprised her with a light hug. Mikasa blushed at the thought, not only did she sleep next to a boy- she woke up in his arms!
How disorientating were things becoming for her and she honestly didn't want this to be how she came to know Eren. All she wanted was to be there, but not really there. She didn't want to be an inconvenience for any of the Jaeger's and here she was bothering them.
Three knocks at the door then it slightly opened revealing Eren in a heavy-eyed state, "Hey, Mikasa, you ready to go to the kitchen? I'm sure there is breakfast ready by now".
She had lost track of time it seemed like only a minute ago Eren went off to the restroom but here he was within the instant making her blush again at the thought of last night.
As they both set off to the kitchen Mikasa couldn't help but glance around the house. It was simple there seemed to have little to no decorations and appeared to be much smaller than her house.
A pleasant, feminine voice echoed in the kitchen, "Good morning children! Did you sleep well?"
Mrs. Jaeger seemed to be as bright as ever while she was preparing breakfast for the kids. She had a certain air to her that made her seem weightless almost even untouchable; she looked at both her and Eren almost like she had something planned. Or maybe Mikasa was overlooking it too much, she did look like a nice woman and very pretty.
Eren pulled out a seat for Mikasa and she nodded- accepting the gesture but taking her out her own seat- she couldn't help but feel saddened by all this. It was only yesterday where she woke up to her own mother's cooking.
Eren got a little disgruntled at seeing Mikasa not take the chair but he tried not to dwell in it. She probably doesn't want to be a "bother". Thinking back to earlier this morning:
"Mikasa you don-"
She anxiously jumped off his bed, "I'm sorry! I don't remember moving towards you. I didn't do it on purpose."
He sighed and slowly pushed the blanket away from him to follow her, "Even if you did. I. Don't. Care. You're making this a big deal. It really doesn't bother me"
Mikasa looked at him with a tortured face- almost like she was back in the cabin when he first saw her, "I don't want to be a burden . . ."
"Mikasa, you're not a burden and you never will be." He told her with much conviction.
She looked up at him almost ready to cry and Eren was prepared to hold her if that was what she needed. Instead, she just took a deep breath and exhaled her whole body following her actions.
Then her face changed expression until the tiniest smile was made and she said "Thank you . . ."
He had to admit she looked nice smiling, even if it was just a little, and didn't like that she was back to her usual stoic face expression.
In this world, there was no guarantee that any of us wouldn't die from disease, titans, and unfortunately being killed by your own people. Eventually, he would work on making her smile more often and appreciate being alive.
After they both sat down in the table, Carla had started to set the plates already prepared with food for each of them. Mikasa eyed the food rather oddly. She was not hungry and in all honesty it didn't feel right eating food that was not made by her own mother.
Immediately, she could feel her stomach turning but she had to eat the food. It would be disrespectful to Eren's mother if she didn't eat any of it. Before picking up the utensil Mikasa turned to Carla and said "Thank you Mrs. Jaeger".
With a warm smile and nod of appreciation she responded, "Anytime Mikasa let me know if you like it."
Silence soon followed and Carla couldn't help but feel it was impossible to avoid. She didn't know the girl in any personal level and she couldn't just start questioning her with trivial questions.
She needed time to make herself feel comfortable with all of them but she had to try to make her feel comfortable, at least with Eren. With a plan in mind she cheerfully announced, "Eren, after breakfast, why don't you and Mikasa go to the market and pick up some groceries?"
He groaned, "Ugh, mom do we have to? It gets so crowded and it smells like shit."
"Eren! Watch your language in front of Mikasa. Besides, if you go, you and Mikasa could meet up with Armin after."
Eren's eyes lit up and excitedly responded, "Really?"
Carla nodded at the boy's enthusiasm. She was glad to know that Eren had at least one friend. He always did struggle getting along with people.
He probably got that from his father's side because she never understood how he could easily disregard people's company. Just like Grisha always keeping to himself with books.
Eren turning towards Mikasa asked, "Mikasa! Do you want to go see Armin?"
"Huh?" Mikasa was lost at the moment; she had been focusing on not regurgitating Mrs. Jaeger's food. Not that it tasted bad, on the contrary, it was delicious but her stomach did not want to hold any of it.
"I said if you want to meet Armin today?" Eren paused; he should have thought more of what she wanted to do. Maybe she wasn't in the mood to meet people.
"Sure, sounds nice" Mikasa replied.
"Hey, if you don't want to go we don't have to. No hard feelings I promise!"
"No, I want to go." Mikasa replied with no hesitation.
It was enough to convince Eren and he quickly turned to his mom and with much happiness filling in him he impatiently asked, "Can we go now?"
Carla couldn't help but reply yes, she hasn't seen him in a while this excited to run some of her errands, even when they involved the possibility of seeing Armin after. It was probably because he wants to show off Mikasa to Armin, her son had the habit of proudly showing off. That he probably got from me.
Shortly after, Mikasa and Eren headed towards the market with the list of groceries and money given from his mom. The list didn't consist of much and it wasn't as much of a hassle as Eren thought it would be but he still hated it.
Throughout the whole trip people were staring at them and whispering most likely nonsense. Word around Shiganshina spreads like wildfire and of course they probably couldn't believe what Eren had done and how different Mikasa looked from the rest of them. Eren is used to being stared at or looked down upon but Mikasa didn't deserve the questioning stares.
Then his mom wonders why he doesn't get along with people but how could he when most of them are so unbelievably judgmental. After shaking off the negative energy from the market and once they returned with the groceries to his mom they finally went off to see Armin.
Mikasa and Armin were on the porch still waiting for Armin to come out. Apparently, he couldn't come out until he finished cleaning or at least that's what his mom insisted on.
Eren always felt she didn't like him- probably because he had the habit of starting fights, which would leave Armin and him with bruises. It wasn't like he intentionally started them it's just that all the people his age considered them to be heretics since they would talk about leaving the walls.
Eren had to shake these thoughts off and decided to start small talk with Mikasa, "So how do you like the village by far?"
She slightly shrugged her shoulders, "It's not that bad. I've never seen so many people in one place."
"Yeah, it's crowded around here. Too many people living in a small area." He looked towards the floor as he made that realization.
"Do you not like it?" Mikasa could not help but hear the contempt hidden behind his voice.
Once again going back to his previous thoughts he sighed, "It just gets me so mad that we live like this. Behind these walls, in fear of the titans, waiting for the end . . . like were caged animals . . ."
"But we are alive."
Eren couldn't help but feel a little ungrateful here he was talking about how he wants more than this limited lifestyle but he forgot whom he was talking to. Mikasa didn't have a family anymore and would probably do anything just for her family to be alive. He was about to apologize when Armin came out.
Disrupting both of them out of their train of thoughts, "Eren!"
The blonde came out rushing out of the door and he hadn't expected a visit from Eren, especially considering the last time they were together things got out of hand. Suddenly, Armin then realized that Eren wasn't alone.
There was a girl next to him with a pale complexion, raven black hair, and her eyes appeared to be slightly slanted. He didn't realize he was staring at her until Eren waved his hand in front of his face.
"Armin!" Eren was surprised to see Armin look so lost he usually was more aware of his surroundings.
Feeling quite embarrassed, he tried to regain a calm composure, "U- um, I-I'm sorry. I just didn't think you would have company."
"Ah, that's right! Mikasa, this is my best friend Armin." Mikasa nodded at Armin.
"Armin this is Mikasa!" Armin was still staring at her, probably not being able to understand what was so special about this girl that Eren actually met and liked this girl.
He soon remembered his manners and moved towards her with his right hand to give a greeting with a handshake. Mikasa took his hand and he couldn't help but notice how soft her hand was.
He stepped back once the handshake was over and decided to find out how she came about. "Did you just move in recently? I've never seen you around before." She looked down and apathetically responded, "You could say that".
Armin looked at her questioningly but noted from his peripheral vision that Eren's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his sockets and his head was forcefully moving side to side.
In the following moment, he realized how Mikasa's shoulders slumped when he asked the question regarding why she was here. How her whole demeanor changed and she seemed lost in a tragic thought. Tragic. Armin concluded something dreadful must have happen and his question only triggered her emotions.
He had to do something quick.
With a bright smile he told her, "Well it doesn't matter where we come from, where all the same. Right, Eren?"
"Right! Hey, I was wondering if you could show us one of your books?"
Armin was a bit taken back. Eren knew the books he had were banned in the walls and to reveal such a delicate matter to someone they just met was a little dangerous.
But he went along, "Sure, which one though. My Grandpa only let's me borrow a few of them."
"I'll go with you to pick it out. Mikasa, is it okay if you stay here?" He leaned in closer to her so only she could hear, "It's so his family doesn't try to bother you."
After she replied yes both Eren and Armin went to his room to find a book. Once they entered the room Eren quickly rampaged Armin to the side of his room.
In a hurried yet silent tone Eren immediately took this opportunity to tell Armin the rules.
"Look don't ask Mikasa about her parents, why she moved here, and why she looks sad. She has had a very hard time and it would be best just to try to keep her mind off those things."
What? He couldn't believe Eren would have such an odd request. Eren was never invested so much in peoples' lives.
But while noticing the desperation in his tone, the lifeless girl, and the rumors from the day before in an instant Armin finally put all the pieces together "She's the girl. So that means . . . you".
He didn't need to finish his sentence Eren's eyes answered for him. So the rumors were true. Armin had heard of a child who had supposedly killed 3 men in order to save a little girl in the outskirts of the village.
He assumed it was a lie, towns like these would blow everything out of proportion just to spread gossip but that's why he hadn't pursued any more information. Unfortunately, this time around the rumors were true.
His best friend had murdered and he was here right in front of him. He wanted to ask so many questions, but realized this wasn't the time. As the minute pressed on Armin finally spoke legibly.
"Eren, I understand why you did it. You're really brave to have saved her like that." And Armin was happy with that response because it was the truth. Not many would have risked their life to save someone- especially a stranger.
Looking away not really wanting to talk about it he responded, "Thanks . . . but that doesn't matter right now. Let's just try to make her happy."
"You're right. Here I'll get 2 books and we'll let her decide what she wants to hear." As Armin began to shuffle through his belongings Eren couldn't help but to remember the question he had from the encounter between Armin and Mikasa.
Finally he spoke, "Hey, Armin?"
Still rummaging through his things Armin answered, "Yes?"
"When you were talking to Mikasa I was trying to stop you before you even asked her when she moved in and you're usually really good at catching my signs. But you didn't this time. What happened back there?"
As Armin finally stood up straight with both books wrapped around his arms pressed to his chest Eren noticed a faint tint on his cheeks and lack of eye contact. "I guess I got distracted, sorry about that it was my fault."
Eren became confused, "Distracted? By what?"
"Um by . . .Mikasa." Armin could feel the blood pumping in his ears.
Eren was becoming impatient. "Mikasa?
"Well, I don't know, she looks different."
"There is nothing wrong with that!" Eren defended her immediately.
Waving one arm frantically he tried to calm Eren down, "No, not like that. I-I meant to say she-"
"What? That's she's weird because she is different. I never thought you out of all people would judge her." Looking at Armin with rage filling his eyes.
"Eren it's not like that!"
"Then what is it Armin because you're not making any sense!" Eren was mad by this point, maybe bringing Mikasa to meet Armin was a bad idea. If he wasn't going to accept Mikasa for who she was then maybe Armin's not the kind of friend he thought he was.
"I just thought she was cute." Armin responded in a light grumble feeling incredibly defeated and embarrassed. However, Eren didn't know what to say- he didn't think Armin was going to say that.
But Armin pursued his case, "I don't think she's weird and I'm sorry if I made it seem like that. She just looks . . . nice and I didn't know how to react. And her hand was so soft."
Eren furrowed his eyebrows and coldly responded, "Don't talk about her like that."
He felt ashamed of himself, "You're right, the incident. I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have said that considering what she went through and would have gone through if you didn't save her."
Eren sighed, "I guess it's been hard on all of us. But it's been the hardest on her so lets just try to cheer her up, we've been here for too long." And in response Armin nodded, "You're right. And um Eren?"
"Yeah?" he was drained out of energy but still did his best to listen. Armin had to ask, "Can you please not tell her what I said?" He looked at him with a pleading expression.
He grumbled, "I won't." You don't have to worry about that; I wasn't going to.
It was odd to see Eren so quiet. Even though, Mikasa had only known him for a short amount of time it felt wrong not to see him his natural rattled self. She decided to break the silence in his room, "You were right."
"On what?" He responded without looking up.
She did her best to sound cheerful, though deep down she knew she wasn't, "Armin is nice."
"Yeah, he is." He replied with a dispassionate taste.
Everything did go as planned. Eren and Armin took Mikasa by an old tree they always play by and read her stories from myths to the wonders from outside the walls.
Mikasa did seem to be entertained and was an active part of the conversation. On her own accord, she even shared a story her mother once told her. It was going great but Eren couldn't help but feel a little disgruntled by how close Armin was with Mikasa the whole day.
The way he was always looking at her, smiling, laughing, and being too nice it all bothered him to no end.
What happened to him? She wanted to know. "Eren?"
He didn't look her direction. "What?"
In a soft tone she asked, "Are you okay? You look . . . mad?"
"I'm not mad."
Mikasa had a hard time believing him but she didn't want to start an argument, "Well, then is everything okay?"
He had enough of the small chat and decided to clear his mind "What else do you think of Armin?"
"Huh?" Her eyes slightly widened in confusion. How does what I think of Armin have anything to do with this?
Clenching his fists at his side he pursued the answer. "Well? What do you think of Armin?"
She responded slightly baffled, "I told you. I think he is nice."
"What else?" He looked at her with a stern facial expression.
Unmoved by his demeanor she nonchalantly responded, "He seems smart."
He began to feel lighter, "Anything else?"
"No, not really? Why?" Mikasa did not understand what was going on and as much as she wanted to continue to talk her body felt tired. She wanted to get to the bottom of this, but she felt she was going to fall asleep soon.
Eren couldn't help but feel much better; it was like his headache finally went was now happy to know that all three of them could be friends and get along. It would have been complicated if things would have gone a different route.
Mikasa and Armin? No, she wouldn't. Armin is a good guy and all but he doesn't deserve someone like Mikasa. She deserves happiness and Armin wouldn't know how to give it to her. He wasn't there to see what she saw he wouldn't understand her- no their- struggle.
Eren had spaced out after Mikasa had asked him the question. He seemed to be lost in thought but still bothered and she didn't know what was wrong. The whole day was nice even though Eren talked less and less as the day progressed. What happened?
She couldn't pinpoint the issue and she didn't want to ask in risk of Eren getting angry- like he tends to a lot. So she decided to comfort him like he comforted her last night. She sat against the wall next to Eren and leaned her head on his shoulder.
He didn't realize he had spaced out until he felt Mikasa's body press against his side. Looking down he could see Mikasa from the moonlight shining through the window with her eyes shut, breathing evenly, and looking so delicate.
Wait, what?
Did he just think Mikasa looked soft? What the hell does that even mean? Armin was stupid that's what he is for getting those ideas in his head now. What if Mikasa looked soft and possibly even smelled nice?
It shouldn't matter just because she is a girl; it doesn't mean they have to think those things even if they do think those things. Everything was getting so confusing and it shouldn't be.
He shouldn't be thinking about things like this. It wasn't right; Mikasa just lost her family to disgusting people who tried to sell her so she can be abused. And here he was thinking about how soft her face looked.
Eren felt disgusted with himself. He shouldn't be thinking about Mikasa like that, especially Armin.
"Eren" Mikasa whimpered as she nuzzled her head on Eren's shoulder.
Startled he responded, "Yes?" but she didn't respond. Eren figured she probably fell asleep it had been a long day. But he couldn't deny the fact that Mikasa looks at peace and she smells . . .nice.
It's not the end of the world just because he thinks Mikasa is nice to look at, or whatever. He wasn't going to treat her any different because of it and he certainly was no monster like the men from the day before.
Overall, the day was much better compared to yesterday. Mikasa looked sick yesterday and she barley talked and coming to think of it the most she spoke a lot more than he had expected her to.
Today, even though she didn't initiate conversations she nodded and seemed to be paying attention to his and Armin's conversations. Eren figured what Mikasa needed for now to help her get through this was a distraction.
He was willing to be her distraction as long as she needed it and he would be there to protect her too.
Life wasn't supposed to be like this. Mikasa should have been able to live with her parents and found her happiness. Now she will always be scarred by the memory of seeing her parents die in front of her.
He took one last look at the girl on his side and couldn't help but smile at seeing her. As of now, reality has been her nightmare and sleep is the only place where she can escape. Things will get better Mikasa; they have to.
With that last thought, and as he closed his eyes, he could almost imagine the adventures he will have with his new friend, Mikasa.
-Any review and or suggestion would be greatly appreciated!
