A/N: Big thanks to Winnie ( NoonansBartista) for the incredible prompt. I hope I did it justice! This is a one shot that will maybe turn into more... maybe.
Maggie heard about it over the police comms. A voice crackled through the line, a person she didn't know was talking about a person she did know, a person she knew, so well.
"Supergirl down, quickly losing ground in a fight. Feds are spotted en route to the scene. Patrol units needed for crowd control and traffic management."
Maggie's hand tightened around the steering wheel of her car, parked in the dark alley downtown at the scene of her most recent case—where she was supposed to be, not with Supergirl who was Kara, not with the Feds who weren't Feds, the Feds who were Alex, dressed in tactical gear and yielding weaponry Maggie could only dream of.
Not with Alex, her Danvers, whose watery wide eyes were etched in Maggie's mind, whose shaking worried voice was echoing in her ear like it always did when Kara got hurt.
"Holy shit, Supergirl's really looking bad," a rookie came over on a different line and Maggie's hand jutted forward, slamming off the police radio.
Once the car was swathed in silence she dug her phone out of her pocket, tore through her text conversations until Alex's contact photo was beaming up at her. Maggie's thumb lurched forward to open the conversation, then hovered.
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. Two opposite magnetic forces attracted and repelled her simultaneously. The space between her thumb and the screen decreased then expanded.
A knock thumped twice against the car window and she swiped the page away, dropping her thumb and turning off her cell.
She stared at the blackened screen, running her hand over it when another knock drew her gaze up to the window. The reflection of her partner stared back at her and he raised his hands up, inquiring what'd been taking her so long to get out.
"All right, all right, Fisher," she called, tugging on her windbreaker. "I'm getting out in a second, back off."
She tossed a glare out of the tinted window and Fisher only grinned. Grabbing her flashlight and pocketing her phone, Maggie got out of the car, shivering in the night air.
/
Alex slammed the van door closed behind her, sprinted in the front of the pack of DEO agents. Kara was falling, backlit by moonlight and the golden glow of the city skyline. Kara was falling and people were screaming and then people were hushed and Alex's heart thundered a staccato beat and Kara was closer to the ground and Alex darted around a crowd, feet shuffling and scraping concrete, and Alex wasn't quick enough. Wasn't strong enough or smart enough to stop it.
"Supergirl!" The guttural cry was ripped from her throat and swallowed by the boom of Kara crashing, colliding, cracking into the street and the earth yielded, just slightly, just marginally—not enough, not enough, never enough—to the force.
Alex's legs were numb with the speed of her movement and she knelt on shaking limbs, amongst the rubble and dust and ash. Smoke and tears choked her throat. "Supergirl," she murmured, stretched out a hand to the limp frame and this time her voice was drowned out by sirens and gasps before a shrieking silence tore breath away from DEO agents and civilians.
Then, on legs she couldn't feel and a heart she felt too much, Alex stood and shattered the silence. "Get back! I need everyone to get back! We need to make room, she needs help."
The DEO med van parted the crowd and the stars were too bright and the air too crisp as Kara's body was lifted and her limbs flopped and she was breathless. Supergirl was wheeled into the vehicle, Alex's hands guiding the stretcher, gripping the metal. Medics swarmed around the body as the car jolted into motion, applied the oxygen mask, an IV, took vitals.
Then, there was stillness, then there was waiting. Alex brushed back Kara's hair, ran a hand down her shoulder, placed warm palms on Supergirl's stomach at her sides, pulled them away slowly, brought the shaking hands level with her face. Brows knit together; her hands were saturated in blood.
She lowered them, eyes now trained on Kara. As she squinted at the bleed, Alex's grip sought out her ring finger, moved to feel the metal there. But only flesh drenched in crimson was beneath her quivering touch because Maggie was gone and now Kara was going.
Latex gloves were shoved toward Alex, she snapped them on and covered the mess and someone was saying her name.
Alex blinked and looked at their coordinates on the screen. "We're almost at the DEO, let's prep to move her again."
/
"Supergirl may be deceased," the static words carried over the radio, Maggie's fingers froze on the volume dial as she slumped back into the driver's seat.
The door was still open, a chilled wind funneled down the alley and swirled through the car. Maggie shivered but she didn't move, Maggie's lungs stuttered but she couldn't breathe.
"Feds took her away, unconscious and bleeding badly."
Maggie's hair bunched against her seat as she tilted the back of her head into it, pushing and squeezing her eyes shut. She tightened her hands into fists.
"No more units are required."
Maggie's fingers pattered against her thigh. She wrenched the door closed and shoved her keys into the ignition, tires squealing against the pavement and dust rising as she pulled away from the curb and merged into the street.
The lanes were deserted, the road spanning long before her headlights. Her foot pressed hard and heavy on the gas and she willed the car faster through green light after green light before screeching to a stop.
She parallel parked in the street outside the DEO and then, she waited.
She pulled her knees up to her chest and let her head fall against the seat as she turned toward the building, watched silhouettes cross through its hundred windows, watched agents mill outside, watched cars roll up the ramp of the parking garage and check into work. She watched as cars meandered out, went home to families and warm apartments.
She watched and she waited and she pictured Alex and Kara inside and she wished she were there. Wished she could be there, kissing Alex's forehead and wiping away her tears and whispering away her fears and holding her so, so close. And she wished she could be there, holding Kara's hand and telling her gently, firmly, wholly to hang on, hang on, hang on. To fight.
Because Alex and Little Danvers weren't hers anymore but they were still her family, even from afar.
Maggie's fingers roamed upward, twisted around the collar of her shirt and her thumb frayed at the fabric. She closed her eyes and Alex was there. Alex was there, just a few meters away, a few floors above her. Alex was there, trying to save a life, trying to save her sister's life and Maggie just needed to be there, too.
Maggie needed to be there so that Alex could save her own life. So that there would be someone to hold Alex, to help her stay standing so she didn't have to bear the weight of this alone.
Maggie pulled her phone from the center counsel and opened up the messages page. Alex's name reflected in Maggie's brown eyes and the light from the screen spilled out into the dark car. Their last exchange was time-stamped three weeks ago and the curt responses sent Maggie's gaze back toward the building before she threw the phone into the passenger seat. It bounced off the cushion and clattered to the ground, opening Alex's contact page and Alex's smile was so bright in her picture.
Kara was dying and Alex was alone.
Here, in the street across from the DEO, Maggie was both too far and too close.
Frustration rattled up from her core and she slammed her palms against the steering wheel, again and again and again until her hands were tingling and a sob was in her throat and a whimper of a scream mauled its way out.
Then she took her car out of park and pulled back into the night.
/
"Alex, you need to step out," J'onn walked into the room where the medics had been working for the past three hours. "Everyone else has switched with the night shift, you need a break. You've been going since six this morning."
Alex shook her head. "I'm not going to take a break, Kara is dying, J'onn. She's—she's unconscious and… and her vitals are all over the place and she's… she's got some really, some really bad internal bleeding." Alex's eyes darted from Kara on the bed, past J'onn to the door behind him where she saw James and Winn lingering in the hallway, to the floor and back to her sister then down at her boots where the smear of soot and blood was hidden by the dark color.
She stumbled forward, losing traction on the bottom of her soiled shoe. J'onn reached forward, steadied her with a hand on her shoulder and Alex jerked away.
"Alex, you need to rest, you need to clean yourself up."
The medical staff in the room kept their heads down, focused on treating the wounds they could, trying to delay the impending inevitability of surgery.
"Agent Danvers, I'm ordering you to leave this room. Let people with more objectivity handle this. There's no way you're in the right headspace to do this."
She raised her eyes, locking onto his and clearing her own of the torture ravaging her head. "I'm fine and I'm not leaving."
"Agent Danvers—"
"You and I both know that Kara is going to need surgery. Soon." Alex wiped her sleeve at the sweat on her hairline, then curled her fingers behind her back to hide their shaking. "I know more about her physiology than anyone else here. I need to help prep her, so I need you to leave me alone so that I can focus because I need to do this. Kara needs me to do this for her."
"Alex, you're not—"
She shook her head, took one breath to stop the room from spinning; another to suppress the simmering nausea that'd been sloshing in her stomach since Kara's crashed into the street; took a last one, to steady her words and her hands. "I'm doing this. I'm okay. I'm clearheaded and I'm helping."
"Fine," he conceded with a sigh. "But you're not going into surgery with her. Let the specialists handle that."
Alex nodded and turned away and she found her fingers drifting back, looking for that ring on her left hand. She found her heart racing for Kara and aching for Maggie to be close, to come back. She shut her eyes for a moment, found Maggie's voice in her head and sought out its words—its warmth and strength—oh god, she really just needed to hear her voice or smell her shampoo or feel her touch. She opened her eyes and let her gaze flit toward her phone, discarded on a table by the door.
"Danvers."
She paused.
"We're running low on time, we need to finish now if we want to get control of this bleed."
Alex turned back to the med team.
/
An hour.
She lasted an hour.
After shoving away a bottle of scotch and putting the untouched cup back in the cabinet, Maggie laid in bed for an hour. She stared up at the ceiling until dampened colors spotted in her vision and her eyes burned. She blinked and she saw Kara, bloodied and bruised. She blinked and she saw Alex, all brave-faced and burying things so that her hands shook in her pockets and her heart was bursting in her chest.
She'd seen the news reports. She'd seen Kara, seen Alex; seen all the hurt and anxiousness.
She lasted an hour in her bedroom before she turned over and snatched her phone from the nightstand. With a quick swipe, she got off Alex's contact page and looked at the row of messages, most conversations old and unused now.
She clicked on James' name and sucked in a quivering breath. Her gaze was bleary but her fingers were precise as they ran across the letters.
Maggie Sawyer
2:08 : How is she?
2:09 : both of them… Danvers and Kara?
And Maggie couldn't close her eyes, couldn't stop looking at the screen. A typing box appeared in the bottom left corner and a second later Maggie's phone vibrated in her fingers.
James
2:11 : Both in bad shape
2:11 : She really needs you right now
Maggie tossed off the sheets and pulled her jeans from the floor where she'd discarded them just an hour earlier, changed and threw a few things into a bag and grabbed her keys.
Maggie Sawyer
2:13 : I'm on my way
/
Alex watched as they wheeled Kara out of the prep room, followed behind as they took her into the OR and stood, outside, as the doors swung shut and the hall was empty and the air silent. Florescent lights bounced off the white walls and burned Alex's eyes as she squinted and her head reeled.
She twisted her fingers together, tried to get a glimpse into the room from the little window on the door. All she could see were lab coats, the backs of doctors who were trained for this, who were more equipped to handle surgery than she.
Alex couldn't see Kara though, not when she pressed on wobbly toes and especially not when the threat of tears blurred her vision.
A slimy feeling curdled in her stomach.
She couldn't see Kara's face or her hands—her hands that always ran hot, warmed up Alex's on freezing snowy days; the hands that overflowed with potstickers and grasped mugs of coco; hands that painted and squeezed Alex's shoulder when they hugged.
Alex couldn't even see Kara's vitals or the IV or the breathing tube or the monitors.
Alex turned away from the OR, walked down to the west wing doors, then to the doors on the east wing. Then back. Then one more time. Then again.
She bit her lip.
"Oh god," she whispered, tapping her fingers against her thighs as she paced. "Oh god, oh god, oh god."
Her weak and shaking legs moved faster, up and down the length of the corridor. The sound of her footsteps echoed, was joined by the increasing heaviness of her breathing, clashed with ringing in her ear and the rush of blood and her heart thundering.
"Please no," she whimpered and tried to hold her breath to stop the hyperventilating that burst forward.
Her lungs screamed. She needed something. She needed someone.
"No, no, no, no, no."
She murmured again and again and sunk to the floor with her fingers trailing in front, balanced on the balls of her feet and tilting forward.
"Kara," she cried, grasping against the wall. "Maggie."
She needed to hear her voice.
Alex wrestled her phone from her pocket, pulled up Maggie's name and pressed 'call.' It took a moment to find connection and Alex's fingers jerked again, hanging up as she let her head fall forward, hitting the wall.
/
Maggie tapped her foot in the elevator. She'd gotten here on James' directions, a left turn and then a right one and then the west elevator up to the fifth floor and a switch to the second elevator where she stood now, twisting her fingers around the strap of her bag and coaching her breathing.
The doors parted with a ding and Maggie darted out. Just a single turn remained, one to the left, then a long stretch of corridor and a set of double doors.
Her shoes squeaked as she quickened her pace.
/
Alex brought a hand up to her chest and another pressing hard against her forehead, still covered in the same stupid blue latex gloves from hours before. Her phone clattered against the tile.
A short breath rattled out of her lungs and another and another. Too fast, too fast, too fast; when she'd been too slow, too slow, too slow for Kara.
She squeezed her eyes shut and white spots sparked in the darkness, from dizziness or lack of breath, or pressure.
She whimpered and dropped her head and the double doors eased open.
In the long, lone hallway, Alex's cowering frame stood out in black against the fluorescent bulbs and white walls.
Soft, light footsteps shuffled for a moment, grew faster, grew closer.
The footsteps stopped.
Maggie's hands hovered, near Alex's hair, near her back and her shoulders. Around this body, this beautiful, broken, familiar figure, her hands felt foreign. A lump formed in Maggie's throat and only Alex's breathing filled the air of the large hallway.
Maggie's own shaking inhale joined Alex's.
The agent raised her head, blinked, and launched herself upward, slipping and shaking, from her crouched position and into Maggie's arms.
And then her hands knew where to go—knew too much, almost, in a struggle to decide where to touch first—as she rubbed Alex' back, smoothed her hair, caressed her arm, squeezed the shoulders she knew were aching with tension and guilt and self-deprecation.
"Oh, Alex." Her name was a revered whisper, an inevitability.
Alex twisted her hold loosely around Maggie's neck. With their bodies pressed together a gasp for air sputtered out of Alex's lung and she inhaled—breath jagged and all wrong; but all right. All right, warm in the crook of Maggie's neck.
"Oh, Al. All right, okay. Let's get ahold of this breathing, together, okay?" Maggie asked, pulling back from Alex just slightly, and cupping her face. Beneath Maggie's touch, Alex's posture sagged and the gaze that'd been shooting around the hallway locked onto Maggie's face.
"Nice and easy."
Alex whimpered and dropped her gaze as her slowing breath hitched again.
"Oh hey, hey, I know it's hard, I know." Maggie tapped Alex's chin gently with two fingers. "But I believe in you."
The detective gave a soft smile, smoothed back Alex's hair and the agent closed her eyes. "Follow my breathing, we'll do it together… There we go, you're getting there."
"All right, you're good, you're okay," Maggie whispered, rubbing Alex's back as she stood, looking distantly down the empty hall.
It was like talking past her when Maggie spoke. "Hey, Alex, how about we get you cleaned up? I bet you'll feel a little better."
Alex didn't respond, but she didn't resist either as Maggie put an arm around her shoulder, took some weight off Alex's legs as she guided them down the hall. Alex's gaze lingered on the OR behind them, kept flickering back until Maggie took Alex out through the double doors.
She leaned closer into Maggie's touch, shrinking as the halls grew busier, as agents averted their gaze as they passed. Alex's ribcage fluttered under the arm Maggie had wrapped around her back. Maggie blinked hard, burying her own tears at the battered and broken state of Alex—of Alex, who wasn't her fiancée anymore but didn't feel like her ex either, not now when they were fitted together.
It was just Alex: her something, her someone, her somebody.
Her everything.
"All right, come on. Here we go," Maggie said as they entered the locker room and Maggie breathed out a sigh of relief at finding it empty.
"Get started on washing your hands, I'll grab us a few things."
Alex stumbled toward one of the sinks, elbows locking as she leaned heavily on the porcelain, shoulders raised tightly. Maggie ran a hand over Alex's shoulder blade, turned away to grab some towels from the other side of the room where the showers were located.
Alex looked down. Dried riverets of crimson ran from beneath the latex gloves. Alex furrowed her brows, felt nausea surge as images of her hands soaked in Kara's blood pressed up against her memory.
A suctioned sound of resistance filled the silence as Alex peeled off the gloves and coagulated clumps of blood came with them, deep red etched out the lines of her palm and the dried liquid painted her skin, gathered under her nails.
The gloves dropped into the trashcan and when Maggie turned back around, Alex was leaned over it. A strangled choking noise and whimper passed Alex's lips and before Maggie could get to her, Alex was heaving, losing the long battle against her stomach as bile burned up her throat and she vomited.
"Shit," Maggie whispered, dropping the towels on a bench and rushing to Alex's side. "It's okay, you're okay, Al." Maggie rubbed Alex's shuddering back as she hunched further over, gagging and spitting. "You're okay, you're okay. Just let it out."
Alex threw up one more time before she raised her head, gripping the edge of the trashcan.
"Think you're done?" Maggie asked, keeping one hand on Alex's back as she fished through her bag with the other, producing a water bottle. She broke the seal and pressed it into Alex's shaky hands. "Here, swish and spit."
Alex's fingers curled around the bottle and stayed still. Maggie's gaze lifted from Alex's hands up to her lips to see them murmuring. "Sorry, I'm sorry." Her lips were moving but no sound was coming out and her eyes were watery and red-rimmed.
Maggie shook her head and the water bottle sloshed in Alex's hand as Maggie pulled Alex into a hug. "There's no need to be sorry, okay? I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all of this."
Her closeness, her steadiness and warmth, relaxed Alex's muscles, soothed the queasiness in her stomach, and silenced the residual roaring of sirens and screaming in her ear.
Maggie felt Alex shaking her head against her shoulder, held her for a moment as Alex nestled close.
"Here, sit down, babe," Maggie said without thinking, without feeling anything but worry and desperation for Alex, for making her feel better. She moved to the double benches with Alex still pressed against her, eased the trembling brunette down until she was sitting.
"Can I um… Is it—is it okay if I clean you up?"
Alex nodded, eyes flitting toward the door, toward the direction of the OR housing Kara. A ghost of a murmur on Alex's lips had them trembling in voiceless quiver of "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
Maggie's heart clenched in her chest and she squeezed Alex's hand, still bloody. She ran a hand over Alex's hair, stilled mused with sweat and soot. She waited until the tap water was hot, soaked the end of a towel in it over and over as she started with Alex's face, wiped across her cheeks bones, her nose, and her aching forehead. She went again and again until Alex's skin was soft and tinted pink with flushness and warmth.
Alex's eyes searched out Maggie's then flitted away each time the detective raised her gaze to meet them.
The towel was darkened and Maggie switched to another, had to scrub at Alex's palms and under her nails to erase the red there. The white fabric was dyed pink when Maggie pulled away, saw Alex looking in the direction of the showers.
"Want to shower real quick?"
Alex gave a small nod.
Maggie smiled at her and checked the water, made sure it was warm enough before walking Alex over to the stall. "I'll be right out here, okay?" she said softly as Alex slipped behind the curtain. "I'm just going to clean up and grab you some clean clothes, I'll slip them onto the little bench in here, so call me if you need anything… You can, um, you can talk to me, you know." She swallowed and tucked hair behind her ear, staring at the closed door. "When you—when you, feel ready of course. There's no rush. I'll just… I'll just be out here, a call away."
Maggie's words hung in the air and Alex's clothes gave a soft thump as they dropped to the floor and the pattern of water splattering the shower tiles changed as Alex slipped into the heat.
Maggie moved the dirty towels away and wiped up spilled water. She pulled the clothes out of her canvas bag and refolded them, stacking the layers into a neat pile before laying it behind the curtain and slipping out, sitting back on the long bench and dropping her head into her hands, a headache throbbing behind her eyes.
Alex was… a mess, and Kara… Maggie hadn't even seen her yet. Her phone vibrated against the bench and Maggie's posture shot up, heart racing at the sudden noise. Water splashed as Alex flinched in the shower.
Maggie looked down to see a pair of texts, one from James and one from Winn, asking if Maggie had reached Alex, asking if she knew where she was.
As she was typing a reply, James flung open the door to the locker room. Maggie spun around, shushing them as she rushed over, urged them back across the threshold.
"What?" she whispered, splitting her glare between James and Winn beside him.
"Hey, easy Maggie. We were just looking for Alex. We got worried when she wasn't in the hallway anymore and we hadn't heard from either of you."
"She's with me, just getting cleaned up in the shower. She's-" Maggie glanced over her shoulder and stepped out of the locker room, keeping the door slightly ajar with her hand. "Listen, I'm—I'm trying, okay?" Her chest was hot and her cheeks burned as her breath hitched. "I'm doing every—everything I can. She just… she isn't talking and she's having trouble focusing and I'm just… I'm just trying to be there for her but I—" she raised her shoulders and shrugged, swiped at the tears that spilled over. "I don't know," she sighed, high and breathless, planting her gaze on the scuffed toe of her boot.
Then James wrapped her up in a hug, arms engulfing her entire frame as Winn patted her back, a little awkwardly and a lot more comfortingly than she would have expected.
"Sorry," she murmured, with a watery excuse of a laugh as she pushed away the last of her tears with shaking fingertips. "Thanks," she said to Winn, shooting him a small smile.
James pulled back. "She kept looking at her phone, kept reaching for her ring finger… she needed you then when Kara got hurt and she needs you now while we wait, Maggie. She needs you, okay? None of us could get her to do anything. We took turns, trying for hours to get her to rest, to slow down or eat something or clean up, but she didn't budge until you got here. You showing up is probably the best thing that could have happened to her right now, second only to Kara miraculously healing."
Maggie swallowed, rubbed at the second wave of tears dripping forward. She sniffled. "You really think so?"
"Definitely, Sawyer."
"Me too," Winn nodded.
"Just keep doing what you're doing. We're both going to head home, but J'onn's staying if you need anything. And Maggie?" James continued as he pulled the door open the door and Maggie turned to go in with a soft thanks. She paused and looked back at him. "We're all glad that you're here."
Maggie gave a soft smile as she stepped inside. "Me too."
Her lone footsteps pattered against the ground and she dropped back onto the bench, fidgeting with the hem of her sweater.
Her brows furrowed a moment later at a loud, rattling sigh and rasping fragment of a voice.
She straightened up, head tilting toward the shower.
Alex coughed and her voice barely reached over the sound of water. "Maggie?"
"Yeah, hey," Maggie said softly and stood up, relief swelling inside her as hope tingled in her limbs. "I'm here."
"Okay. Okay good." The water cut off.
A moment passed and Alex stepped out, tugging the worn crewneck sweater over her head. There was still a sliver of shiny conditioner in her hair, still a spot of soapy bubbles around her left ankle. She toweled off her hair quickly, features falling.
"You're here," Alex murmured, fingers twisting in front of her, body tight with hesitation.
"Of course I'm here," Maggie whispered, voice breaking and tears brimming. "I'm always going to look out for my Danvers girls. I should have gotten here sooner, I'm sorry."
Alex shook her head and water droplets splattered onto the tile floor. " 'S okay. I missed you."
"I missed you, too."
A sob crushed Alex's ribs and she brought a hand upward to cover her mouth, shoulders slumping as she hung her head.
Maggie's arms enveloped Alex's bent, trembling frame and Alex melted into the touch.
"Kara… She's really banged up and she's b-bleeding a lot. It's not good… it's not good at all… she…" Alex groaned and pressed her face against Maggie's collarbone, squeezed her hands into fists and opened them as Maggie stroked her back, slow and steady.
"She's in surgery, she could… she—Kara's not good she could die, Maggie, I wasn't…" Alex hiccupped and tightened a fist around the back of Maggie's sweater. "I wasn't enough, I couldn't save her."
"You don't know that Alex." Maggie's breath was warm on Alex's hair as she tucked her chin down by the agent's ear. "You did everything you could. You always do."
Alex sobbed and Maggie's hands were waiting, cupping her cheeks and catching her tears.
Maggie let her own cries fall silently into Alex's already damp hair.
"What am I… What am I gonna do? What happens next?" Alex asked, chest rising and falling against Maggie's as their deep breaths synced, tearss slowing.
Exhaustion permeated their frames, sent them slumping deeper into the embrace, clinging to soft fabric and warm skin.
"We wait," Maggie whispered and Alex pulled away, looking at her with glistening eyes.
The hopeful lilt in Alex's voice sent Maggie crumbling. "We? Together?"
Maggie slid her hand into Alex's, felt her pulse beating softly.
"Together."
