Dear Readers…ENJOY and leave me feedback. This is hopefully my first of many fics :D

SPOILERS WARNING: This does have spoilers for episode Dirty Loyal.

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Betrayal

The word is screaming through her head and echoing with a vengeance. She can't think straight, her mind is a jumbled mess. Her body is buzzing with suppressed emotions.

She quakes so violently that her cup sloshes its sugary contents onto her unsteady hand. She wants to scream and beat her hands against her desk but she holds knowing such actions would be useless and childish.

"Gillian?"

Gillian jerks and the drink Cal had sent to her through his "deaf annoyance" splashes violently across the floor splattering her bare legs. Gil...laughs… a strangled sound.

Emily darts forward to kneel in front of the mess trying to sop it up with Kleenex, "I'm so sorry! I thought you saw me, you were looking right at me."

Gillian searches her memory and realizes that, yes, some part of her had registered Cal's daughter's presence shadowing her doorway.

"It's alright, Emily. Leave it."

Emily whips her up to stare at Gillian, "Are you sure?" The response was…un-Gillian, not the kindness but the casual disregard to the mess seeping into the carpet.

Gillian smiles, "We do have one janitorial personage left on staff." It was all they could afford.

Emily's piercing gaze is too much to handle, too much like her father's but Gillian doesn't look away, to do so would alarm the girl, inform her that all was not right in the Lightman Group World.

"Gillian?" Emily's voice is hesitant and she looks down and away from Gillian, breaking their staring match.

Gillian shakes her clouding emotions to focus on the young girl kneeling on the floor before her sensing the gravity in that single phrase.

"Don't leave, please" her voice trembles.

Gillian's brows furrow and she searches her mind trying to decipher the beseeching words.

"I know… I know dad's being an ass. Everything…everything he's been doing to you is wrong. Some of it misguided, I'm sure of it. He thinks he's always right even when he knows he's wrong. I know he doesn't apologize, not properly anyways. I know he apologizes to other people but you're different." She takes a shaky breath, "He does everything differently with you. He's different with you. Good different mostly, even though you might not see it. Just please don't leave him, don't leave us. I know he deserves it but please don't go" Emily sobs, turning red rimmed eyes to the shocked woman sitting tightly wound in an office chair.

Loyal to a fault. Echoes through her mind over and over and over and she can't shake the words. She can't shake his voice and his tone. None of it will leave her.

Gillian's vision flashes red, and later she'll be appalled at her disregard for the young woman crouching on her office floor but right now, right now she lusts for blood. The dam that staunched the flow of her emotions has ruptured violently and she's hard pressed to patch the rupture.

She's angry for Emily. She's angry for herself.

She flies from the chair and isn't fazed by the squelching of her heel as it steps directly in the wet sticky carpet. She's storming from her office the buzzing in her ears drowning out the surprised voice of Emily Lightman.

She's angry at herself.

That thought reins in her rage and she changes the direction of her violent heels that crack sharply on the linoleum. She veers from the object of her rage as it heads towards her and pulls herself together as she heads towards the lobby. Surprisingly or perhaps unsurprisingly he doesn't follow.

~.

Emily stands paralyzed in Gillian's office doorway orange slushie staining the knees of her jeans.

"What? What did you say to her?" Cal Lightman spits at his daughter.

"I didn't, I didn't…"she replies wildly unable to voice much more.

Cal calms taking in his daughter's frightened and frazzled appearance.

"Never mind, luv. I'm sure it wasn't you" he says giving her a squeeze about the shoulders.

~.

Gillian strides through the lobby trying desperately to catch her spinning thoughts.

She feels betrayed and used,

Oh you wanted me to lie? I see now.

Abused,

You can choose Wallowski or your partner 'cause I will bring down this whole circus act if I have to. Understand? Do you need that in writing?

Well, she's saying Wallowski is clean. Aren'ch you Doctor Fostah?

Underappreciated,

Hey! What you walkin' away for? That's not right, don't do that.

Never mind!

I'm not going anywhere, Gil! So let's have it.

What do you see in her Cal?

I'd have done the same for my partner. It's called loyalty.

That's kind of ironic, from where I'm standing

Defiled,

she's not lying. She didn't know a thing about Swariz or the rest of it.

and….tired….so tired….

Her progress through the lobby is halted as she tries to catch her breath along with her whirling emotions and she's only successful at making things worse. It's as if she's physically spinning. She thinks she hears Heidi calling her name but she can't be sure as her world turns silent then black.

~.

Alarmed shouting reaches the father and daughter and Cal immediately tenses.

"Stay here." He commands, his tone brooking no argument. He rushes towards the commotion and finds a large group of people gathered around something in the lobby.

"Oy! Move it!" He shouts and is surprised to see the sea of people open at his command. What he finds at the center of the crowd has him paling and lurching forward.

Heidi kneels in front of a prone figure. Cal can't see the face of figure but he doesn't have to see. He'd recognize that jacket and shirt anywhere, he's memorized those ass enhancing pants, and hell, he'd even committed those heels to memory.

Torres stands over her body talking quick but concise into her cell.

"What happened?" Cal demands as Torres hangs up.

Torres shrugs but her widened nostrils tell him that whatever did happen she blames him.

"Can any-bloody-one tell me what the bloody hell happened?"

"She was standing there, she started swaying, and then she collapsed," snapped Heidi.

It appeared Torres wasn't the only one that thought he was the guilty party for Foster's current condition.

Heidi gently rolled Gillian's head from side to side.

"What are you doin'?" He asks with worry.

"Searching for blood. Her head hit pretty hard when she went down" snipped Heidi.

"None of you dolts thought to catch her when she went down?" He rages

Thankfully the insulting replies of those present were cut off by the arrival of the paramedics, Gillian's faint groan, and Emily's frantic exclamations.

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Well I have another chapter in mind…so if you want it…let's get going on those reviews!