This is gonna be a short little story from Axel's point of view, maybe only a few more chapters. Dedicated to all those out there who have ever felt, for one reason or another, that they didn't belong, they shouldn't exist, they weren't loved, etc. I don't own kingdom hearts or anything by square enix. Let me know what you think.
I always thought that college was going to be some of the best times of my life. I wasn't the most active kid out there; I hung out with a bunch of nerds and played tennis on some days, but that was about it. And I thought that I'd be happy with all of that.
The truth was that everything these days seemed so mundane and even painful. Just the slow cycle of wake up, go for a morning walk, eat, go to class, come home, and sleep with few alterations in between. It was like being on a dusty road in the middle of the desert, and not even the rain could really break the ground anymore.
And then he came along. It was sophomore year for me. I was moving into my first apartment off campus, mostly because the damn housing office fucked up the contracts and gave me the short end of the stick. So here I was; getting a shitty little place maybe 10 minutes from all my classes. There were cracks in the wall I'd probably end up paying for, and the bathroom was a nightmare I was too tired to deal with for the first week or so of moving in.
Surprisingly enough, though, it was homey; and the fact that it was all mine meant something to me.
Well, not completely mine. The place was a two bedroom apartment with one bathroom and a nice little common area. I'd gone the random route and was apparently getting some little transfer kid for the room next door. I hadn't thought much about it at the time though...
I saw him once or twice on move-in day. He seemed like a nice enough kid; a little too quiet for me though. I'm pretty extroverted by nature, so my mouth is usually running a mile a minute. Whether or not that's a good thing, I never stop to think about it much. I think that was my problem for a while, never stopping to notice the little things. Anyway...where was I?
Oh yeah. Moving in. Roxas seemed like a sweet enough kid to me, but again, the quiet thing was a bit of a turn off. He kept to himself a lot, but that was better than a partying roommate, I guess. He had the cutest face, but he's thin and short and never looked me in the eye much when I asked him stuff. His eyes were gorgeous, but they always seemed a little sad to me...
We talked about stuff every now and then. Sometimes I'd come home and find him making pasta or something and ask him how his day went. He always said "Fine," or "Good," and asked me back, and of course, I'd ramble on for a bit about it. It wasn't uber exciting shit, but hey, I like to talk things out. Especially when I've got issues. And Roxy always listened well enough. Sometimes he even gave me advice, which was cool, but we never delved very far into his personal life. I remember hearing about his brother once, I think; he's a twin, apparently. That's cool. Reno and me, we're sort of like twins, except he's got big brother syndrome something awful and smothers me to death since my mom's too busy these days!
Sorry. Does it seem like I'm going on a tangent too much? I think I might have a bit of ADD or something, but I never bothered to check it out. Anyways, back to the story.
So we sort of talked, but mostly kept to ourselves. I figured he had his own life and his own friends to deal with, and we were just different guys. It was a snap judgement on my part, but hey, if there were signs, I sure as hell didn't see them! He was a quiet kid, but I never figured something was up or anything!
And this all came to a head one day. I came home from a late evening tennis match with Demyx. I swear, the guy sweats rivers and couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with his racket! But I come in, flip the tv on, put an easy lean cuisine in the microwave and plop down on the couch for a while. I flip to comedy central and watch both Stewart and Colbert. Since I don't watch the news much, I gotta get my daily dose of politics somewhere, as awful as that sounds. And I figure watching both of them gives me a decent balance of the political spectrum.
Before you get on me about that, yes, okay? I know it's satire! I'd probably find it funnier if I knew what the hell they were referencing in the first place, but right then I was just too tired to care...
The shitty old couch was way too comfy for its own good. The next thing I know, it's been 15 minutes and my food is already starting to cool down in the microwave. I pull it out and set it on the cheap table quickly, not caring if I spill any, and go to grab a ginger ale from the fridge.
"Hey Rox, you home?" I shouted, just wondering if he'd gotten the mail or if Id have to go and get it myself at some point.
The place was silent, except for the the roar of the tv and the little buzz you always hear when you stand close to the ice maker and listen hard. That was odd. Usually, Roxas was home by now, buried in his room doing whatever the heck he does at night. I shrugged, not really caring either way, and took a large gulp of the cold beverage in my hand. I sighed and was about to move back to the couch, when all of the sudden I felt nature calling.
Damn. And we were just getting back from commercial too...
I grumbled and wandered back down the hall, only to find the bathroom door partially shut. There was a little crack, so it wasn't completely shut or locked, but that was weird. I had thought Roxy and I had worked out a strict open door policy when it came to the bathroom.
"Rox?" I asked hesitantly, knocking on the door. Unless he was going in there in the dark, there shouldn't be a reason for the door being closed like that. And I couldn't imagine any guy pissing in the dark who wasn't drunk or half asleep, and it was too early, even at night, for Roxas to be either one of those. Besides, as far as I knew, the kid didn't drink.
"Rox? You in there?" I asked again, getting a little more desperate now. I started to push the door open and reached to flip on the light.
"I'm coming in, so you better...be..."
And that's when I finally figured out there was something wrong with the kid. It's not a sin to be quiet or a little bit introverted, but even I knew that finding your roommate passed out on the floor of the bathroom, surrounded by little pools of blood was hardly normal.
