Dear reader, before you start reading, I'd like to explain the reason why I wrote this story. I got an assignment for school, which stated that I had to make a timeline of art, in whichever form we pleased. It had to be educational for others, for example: students in a classroom. I thought to myself: 'A classroom? Nah, too small. I want to teach the whole world! Haha!'
So that's what I did. Most Hetalians are already interested in history and I thought this was the perfect chance to teach you guys something about art as well. If you learned something new, a review would be greatly appreciated. Have fun reading!
To my teachers: Hetalia is a series in which each character represents a country. They were also given human names. Roderich represents Austria (a country that greatly appreciates art and therefore has a lot of knowledge about it) and Gilbert represents Prussia (a country that was seen as a hooligan that did nothing but fight). I thought the two would make an interesting combo.
Since this is a fanfiction, there are some Hetalia jokes you may not get, or names that are unfamiliar to you. My apologies for this. I hope you'll enjoy reading my story nonetheless.
On my profile you'll find a link to a Google Document, in which you'll find a handy overview of all the things Gilbert and Roderich have investigated, with pictures!
Disclaimer: Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya, not to me.
Chapter 1
''Well, let's get to it, then,'' Roderich sighed as he ushered for Gilbert to follow him. He had set the time on the MTTD {Multidimensional Time Travel Device} to approximately 15OOO BC. This device allowed them to take a look around at any place and time in the past, but they wouldn't be visible to anyone living there. They would be like ghosts from the future.
He fumbled with the controls for a bit and before they knew it, they were looking at the entrance of a cave. Not just a cave, but the very cave that would be called 'The Lascaux Cave' in the far future.
''Why are we doing this again?'' Gilbert asked as they stepped inside.
''Ludwig assigned us the task of writing the report on art throughout the centuries. Well, the report will write itself, as the MTTD collects the information automatically. He wants us to check everything in the original time to make sure that the information in history books is correct. That's what our whole organization was founded on, you idiot.''
''Hey, no need to get snappy at me, Specs,'' Gilbert retorted. ''I know that. I was just wondering, why art of all things? It's boring! Couldn't we investigate wars or something?''
''He probably knows that you're in desperate need of education on culture,'' Roderich said, a smirk appearing on his face. This smirk was soon replaced with a frown, however, as they reached the center of the cave. The sight was breathtaking. Their flashlights illuminated the ceiling and walls, which were full of painted animals: equines, stags, felines, bisons and even a human.
But something wasn't right. A lot of animals simply weren't there. There should have been over 2OOO figures, but not nearly all animals were visible, although there were a few human figures on some of the walls.
''I suppose they haven't drawn all of the animals yet,'' he declared. ''It must've taken them years to get all of the walls and ceiling covered. Did you know that the concept 'art' was nonexistent at the time? These figures might have been drawn with charcoal and colored minerals, but we still haven't figured out for what exact reason they were made. Researchers theorize that these paintings could be an account of past hunting successes, or they could represent a ritual in order to improve further hunting endeavors. Although, some people say that these symbols, here, represent the stars,'' he added, while pointing to a couple of dots. ''That could mean that the people that lived in this era knew something about astronomy.''
''So, this is the original one? Impressive,'' Gilbert said as he walked along the cave, completely ignoring the Austrian's monologue.
Roderich's eyebrows shot up. ''Original one?''
The Prussian stopped and turned to face him. ''Yeah, they build a replica of the whole cave because the original one was being threatened by some sort of mold or fungus. The town still needed the tourism, though, so they just build another cave.''
''And how do you know all this?'' Roderich asked, dumbfounded.
''Oh, I visited this place with Francis once,'' Gilbert said with a wave of his hand, his interest in the conversation already lost. ''Is this also where they found that super old statue of a fat woman?''
Roderich's newfound respect for the man's knowledge disappeared immediately.
''We're in France, you fool!'' he fumed. ''You're talking about the Venus of Willendorf, which was found in Austria. It's one of the oldest artifacts ever found and dates between 24OOO and 22OOO BC, making it one of the most famous surviving works of art. It's exactly 11,1 cm high and researchers think it resembles a pregnant woman, that had a function related to fertility. Also–''
''I wish I could be that passionate about an old stone in the shape of a fat woman,'' Gilbert interrupted him, grinning.
''Well, it was found in my homeland, after all,'' Roderich mumbled, already regretting his outburst. He straightened himself and looked at his watch. ''If we're done here, I'd like to move on. We have a whole list of art to go through and only so little time.''
Gilbert sighed, but agreed and took the MTTD out of Roderich's hands. He fumbled with the buttons for a bit and his eyes bulged when he saw their next destination. ''Stonehenge? That's in England, right? Who knows, we might run into Arthur!''
''He wasn't born yet,'' Roderich said, wondering how a man could be so stupid. ''We're traveling to 15OO BC, although they've been building Stonehenge since 3OOO BC.''
''Right,'' Gilbert said, absentmindedly. He pressed the touchscreen and suddenly they were standing on a windy plain in Wiltshire. Before them, they could see what would become one of the most famous monuments of their time. It was an impressive sight: the massive stones set up in circles and in the shape of a horseshoe, all balanced on top of one another; the circular patterns further down the landscape; the shrines that were scattered around the plains…
''Seems like we're not alone,'' Gilbert pointed out. A lot of people could be seen working and talking with each other. Some even seemed to be doing rituals.
Roderich nodded. ''Yes, I can see. Pity we need to hold our distance.''
''What? Can't we go and see what they're all doing? This could be our chance to solve this mystery once and for all!''
''As much as I want to agree with you, that simply isn't our job. We were given the art department, the department of mysteries hasn't been organized yet. Not in this universe, anyway,'' he added under his breath.
Gilbert sighed and took a few steps back. ''Those stones are massive, though.''
''Quite,'' the Austrian agreed. ''Did you know that the bigger ones are called sarsens, while the smaller ones are called bluestones?''
''But they're not even blue!''
''Not at the moment, no. They get a blue hue to them when they're wet. Also, do you see those walls of earth? Those are barely visible in our time, completely eroded by nature.''
Both men walked a little along the plain, but stopped when Gilbert saw something that piqued his interest.
''This looks like a grave,'' Gilbert said enthusiastically, pointing at a patch of earth that seemed to be smoothed out a little more than the surrounding area.
''It very well could be. Up until five hundred years ago, this place was a burial ground,'' Roderich commented.
''Awesome.''
''In our time, a forensic reconstruction was made, based on the bones of a man that was found here. Who knows, maybe it's this man. If you're interested, maybe we could visit the ruins someday.''
Gilbert looked up, smirking. ''Us? Together? Ah, I knew you had a soft spot for me, Specs.''
''Y-you know that's not how I meant it!'' Roderich snapped. ''It was just a suggestion! Just because you don't–''
''Roddy,'' Gilbert interrupted. ''I'm kidding. It's fine.'' He had his back turned to the other man, so he wouldn't be able to see him blush.
Roderich thought it would be best if he changed the subject, so he started babbling about the possible theories surrounding Stonehenge. ''And did you know that the stones are positioned in such a way that they face the midsummer rise and midwinter sunset? All this land was considered sacred in the Neolithic culture.''
''Nope.''
Roderich turned around. ''What do you mean, 'nope'?''
Gilbert looked at him like it was obvious. ''Nope, as in, 'Nope, I didn't know that.' What did you expect?''
Roderich's shoulders sagged a bit further as he sighed in exasperation. ''Nothing. Let's move on.''
''Already?''
''We have a tight schedule, Gilbert.''
''We have all the time in the world! Literally!''
Roderich decided to ignore the man and was already busy finding their new destination on the MTTD. Gilbert looked over his shoulder. ''Egypt?''
''Apparently, yes. Let's go.''
He tapped the device and the next moment they were surrounded by sand. In front of them, they saw the pyramids of Giza, together with the Great Sphinx, its nose still intact. It was the year 255O BC and people were still building the pyramid, which would be finished in about ten years.
''Cool,'' Gilbert said. ''I've never been in the desert before.''
''Well,'' Roderich began, ''We're only about nine kilometers into the Libyan Desert, but the cultivated Nile valley is nearby. As we see, the pyramids are build close to Cairo, the biggest city at the moment. These pyramids belong to the Seven Wonders of the world and is, by far, the oldest.''
Gilbert was already looking at a worker, who was smoothing out the surface of a stone to make it fit perfectly.
''Hey,'' he started, although he knew that the man wouldn't be able to hear him. Gilbert looked up at Roderich instead. ''That's not how the stones look in our time.''
The Austrian nodded. ''In our time, the stones have eroded. This man is making sure that everything stays symmetrical by modifying the stone in a way that its height and width are the same. During construction, which is what we're witnessing right now, the outer surface of the stone was smooth, white limestone.''
''Interesting,'' Gilbert murmured as he moved on to another worker. ''And what's this guy doing?''
''He seems to be making paint.''
''But why?''
''To color the Sphinx, probably. It might look finished as it is, but in our time we found out that it was once colored in very bright colors. Traces were found on the statue, which is one of the oldest and largest statues still intact, by the way.''
Gilbert laughed. ''And Napoleon's soldiers shot his nose off, right?''
Roderich crossed his arms. ''Contrary to popular belief, no, I'm afraid that's not the case. Sketches of the Sphinx by the Dane Frederic Louis Norden, made in 1738, show that the Sphinx is already missing its nose there. Napoleon was born in 1769. Sorry to disappoint you.''
The Prussian shrugged and took another look at the pyramids. ''They're graves, right?''
''Yes,'' Roderich confirmed, pointing to the biggest pyramid of the complex. ''This particular pyramid is being built for the pharaoh Khufu, I believe. It will take them another ten years to finish it, though. They're building at least three different chambers inside the pyramid and a lot of surrounding buildings, including two mortuary temples in honor of Khufu and three smaller pyramids for his wives.''
''He had three wives?''
''The royal family was quite large, actually. He might have had even more, I'm not sure. I do know, however, that he had a lot of brothers, sisters, children and even grandchildren, although we don't know if they're also buried here.''
Gilbert hummed and walked along. They could see the workers carrying out their tasks, such as sculpting and moving stones, but there were also people that provided food and carried water. Just outside the wall surrounding the complex, there appeared to be a town where the workers were housed.
''Hey, I've read about this!'' Gilbert beamed, glad he could finally share some of his knowledge. ''In our time, archaeologists dug all of this up and it turns out the whole layout for the town was planned from the start! They found sleeping quarters, bakeries, breweries, kitchens and even a hospital where–''
He got interrupted by a loud crack to his right and he jumped away as one of the workers crashed through a platform that was raised high above the ground. He hit the ground with a loud thump and continued to lay still as he got surrounded by other workers.
Gilbert visibly swallowed. ''Er… Good thing they've also discovered a cemetery.''
They hurried away from the site and all but ran back to the pyramids, although there was no need for them to run: they were invisible to the workers, after all.
After they'd caught their breath, Gilbert asked, quite suddenly: ''But should this even be considered art?''
''What do you mean?''
''You just told me that these pyramids were built to bury kings and all that–''
''Pharaohs.''
''Yeah, whatever. But what I mean to say is, these things had a purpose and were built solely for that purpose. The shape, size, function… All calculated. I thought art was about beauty and yes, we can think they're pretty, but that doesn't mean it's art, right?''
Roderich adjusted his glasses and considered this for a moment. ''I suppose. I've never really thought about it that way. Most of the 'art' that was made in this time was a symbol or representation for their beliefs, although some art served for people's social or economic status.''
''Some food for thought, then,'' Gilbert mumbled.
''Certainly.'' Roderich looked around once more. ''I think the MTTD has gathered enough information right about now. How about we go on to… Oh!'' He perked up a bit. ''Ancient Greece.''
''Nice,'' Gilbert said, sarcastically. ''Bearded guys talking about philosophical and governmental stuff. Not to mention, too many gods to remember and–''
''Striving economy, language and development in politics,'' Roderich finished sternly. ''Come on, off we go.''
He fumbled with the MTTD for a moment and soon the sounds of chisels were replaced by the sound of someone singing.
''It seems,'' Roderich said as they took in the scene before them, ''That we've landed ourselves in the middle of a theater performance.''
They were standing at the top of an amphitheater, filled to the brim with an enthusiastic audience. In the distance, they could see some other activities, although the streets were almost deserted: everyone was attending the performance.
''When are we?'' Gilbert asked.
''Athens, which– Oh, when? 534 BC,'' Roderich answered. ''They're having a festival to honor the God Dyonisius. And that man,'' he said, pointing at the man on stage, ''Is going to win the competition for tragedy.''
''Really?'' The Prussian frowned. ''I've seen better performances. Who is he?''
''Thespis, who was reputedly the first actor to perform in Greek theater as an individual character instead of as part of a chorus. He introduced the style of theater known as tragedy and was also the first actor to travel from city to city on theatrical tours. As we see, he's singing about Greek mythology. Instead of remaining with the chorus, he'll step out and perform all the individual roles by himself.''
''That's some multitasking, man. But won't the audience recognize him?''
''He'll differentiate between characters by wearing masks,'' Roderich said, looking at Thespis, who was doing just that. ''He's not only the hero of the story, but plays many different characters.''
Gilbert snickered. ''The hero? Don't let Alfred hear you or we'll get another speech.''
''It's funny because it's true,'' Roderich commented dryly, taking out the MTTD again and pressing a few buttons. The scene around them changed and Gilbert jumped in surprise, earning a sigh from Roderich. ''I just fast-forwarded a few years,'' he said. ''It's currently the year 432 BC.''
He turned to look at the silhouette of a building in the distance. ''Now, Gilbert, tell me you recognize that building. If you don't, I'll throw you from the top of the amphitheater.''
''Er…'' Gilbert began, nervously. He squinted at the building that was placed on a higher point, looming over the city. Suddenly his face brightened. ''The Pantheon!'' he declared, his voice full of confidence and triumph.
Roderich stared, not amused. Gilbert's smile didn't waver.
''Close enough,'' the Austrian sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. ''It's the Parthenon.''
''What's the difference?'' Gilbert asked with a little wave of his hand.
''Nothing,'' Roderich grumbled, eyebrow twitching. ''Only 312 years and a whole different culture, city, and… Oh, never mind.''
Gilbert had already moved to take a closer look at the temple and Roderich followed close behind. After a little hike, they had reached their destination.
''So, get on with it, Roddy,'' the Prussian said, grimacing. ''Say what you have to say.''
''Fine,'' Roderich huffed. ''As I said earlier, this is the Parthenon. It's a temple dedicated to the goddess Athena. It took over ten years to build, although people kept adding decorations until 432 BC, which is this year. The style is Doric, although it does have some Ionic architectural features. The decorative sculptures are considered some of the high points of Greek art. From afar, the pillars look straight, due to a slight swelling in the center of the columns. This optical illusion was legendary,'' he explained.
''Whatever,'' Gilbert mumbled. ''I wanna go inside.''
He stormed off and before Roderich knew, he was being pulled along with the other man, entering the temple. They were now standing in one of the two rooms of the Cella, which contained a statue of a beautiful woman. A reflecting pool was placed in front of her.
''Gilbert! Let go off me!''
''Don't shout in a temple, Roddy. Show some respect,'' Gilbert whispered, a big smirk appearing on his face.
Roderich blushed and shook Gilbert's hand off of his arm. ''Idiot,'' he snapped back, his voice a little more quiet this time. He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. ''This is a statue of Athena. It's a sculpture in what I believe to be the classical style, but I could be wrong. Before the classical period came the Archaic one, which was much more simplistic, and after the classical period came one where most art was Hellenistic. During this period, art became much more realistic and expressive. A good example is 'Laocoön and His Sons'. I'm sure you've seen it.''
''Is that the one with that muscular guy strangling a snake or something?''
''Exactly! Very good,'' Roderich replied, pleasantly surprised. ''But let's get back to Athena. Did you know that the gold from this particular statue will be removed in 296 BC, because the tyrant Lachares needed it to pay his army?''
Gilbert flashed a grin at that last statement. ''Ah, this story is finally getting interesting.''
''You wish,'' Roderich said. ''We're talking about art and culture here, not war.'' He ignored Gilbert's protests and went on with his story. ''We're standing in what's called the Hekatompedon – I hope I pronounced that correctly – and what we're seeing in front of Athena here is not just for decoration, although most uncultured people, like you, think it is. The water in the pool is there to add humidity to air and prevent splitting of the ivory elements of the statue. Most temples have a pool for that particular purpose.''
''Alright. But hey, I thought there would be more people in here, but there's not that many. Why?'' Gilbert asked.
Roderich had to think about that for a moment. ''Well, it is a very busy society,'' he pondered. ''The Greek culture was a rich one, and although the term 'culture' didn't exist yet, they did have what they called 'paideia', which means something like 'education'. They mainly focused on education in society, of course. If people were educated properly, they would be an ideal member of the polis, 'polis' meaning 'city'. The aristocratic order of the polis would get schooled in liberal arts, like rhetorics, grammar and philosophy–''
''Sounds like you'd fit right in, Specs!''
''–as well as scientific disciplines like arithmetic and medicine,'' Roderich continued, glaring at the other man. ''An ideal member of the polis would possess intellectual, moral and physical refinement.''
''Oh, never mind, then. They can count you out.''
''Thank you very much for your input, Gilbert,'' Roderich mocked, eyebrows furrowed in irritation. He turned on his heel and started striding towards the exit, when he heard the man apologize quietly from somewhere behind him. He stopped to looked at the Prussian. ''Did I hear that correctly or are my ears deceiving me?''
Gilbert shot him a glare. ''I can still take it back.''
Roderich walked along, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. ''You know, that reminds me of something. The Allegory of the Cave, also called Plato's Cave. Plato's mentor, Socrates, was the one who said that there are three types of beauty: ideal, spiritual and functional beauty. You must have heard of him, right?''
''What if I have?'' Gilbert grumbled, trudging after him.
''Well, Plato describes a group of people who have lived chained to a wall of a cave all of their lives, facing a blank wall. They watch shadows projected on the wall from objects passing in front of a fire behind them. These shadows are the prisoners' reality. According to Socrates, a philosopher is like a prisoner who's freed from the cave and comes to understand that the shadows on the wall are not reality at all, for he can perceive the true form of reality, rather than the 'reality' that is seen by the prisoners. Still following?''
''I think so. But how do I remind you of… that?''
Roderich smiled. ''I think you just showed me a piece of the true you.''
Gilbert immediately flushed and took the MTTD out of the Austrian's hands. ''I-I think we're done here.''
Roderich chuckled. ''Sure. What's our next stop?''
Both men looked at the screen, which said: 'Rome'. Roderich cursed quietly, which earned him a surprised look from the other man. ''What? Not that fond of Italy?''
''It's not that. Italy is a great country… but I'm afraid I don't know that much about the Roman Empire.''
''Well,'' Gilbert said, proudly. ''Good thing I do. Let's see then…'' He pressed the button and off they went. Suddenly, the sun disappeared: they were standing in a huge shadow, casted by none other than the Colosseum.
''Ah,'' Roderich said, relieved that he recognized the building. ''The Colosseum, or as they said around this time: Amphitheatrum Flavium, because it was built in the Flavian dynasty. It's the largest amphitheater ever built and it took them quite some time: from the year 72 to 8O.''
Gilbert shot him an annoyed look. ''I thought you said you didn't knew jack sh–''
''Everyone knows the Colosseum,'' Roderich interrupted. ''Did you know that it could hold between and spectators?''
''Yes, I did,'' Gilbert shot back. ''Did you know that it was used not only for gladiatorial contests, but also for public spectacles such as mock sea battles, executions, re-enactments of famous battles and– ''
''Dramas based on classical mythology? Why, yes, I did,'' Roderich said arrogantly. ''How about the fact that the arcades are framed by half-columns of the Doric, Ionic and Corinthian orders, and that the attic is decorated with Corinthian pilasters?''
''Er… well…''
''And that it is called the Colosseum because of a colossal statue of Nero, nearby? Although, his head was replaced several times with that of other emperors. I wonder why…''
Gilbert straightened himself and put his hands on his sides. ''Yes, Roddy, I wonder why,'' he mocked. ''You're lucky to have me, and not just because I'm awesome, but also because I can answer your question.''
The Austrian rolled his eyes. ''Fine. Spit it out.''
''Alright! Here we go. Nero once ruled over the Roman Empire and that's why they made a statue of him. They always made statues of the emperors, so everyone in the Empire would know who they were. They were almost seen like gods. Of course, Rome was the center of it all, so it had one of the biggest statues. There was a time when a Roman guy said some Latin stuff–''
''Oh, did he now?''
''And it translates to something like ''When Rome falls, so falls the world','' Gilbert said. ''But to answer your question: they replaced the head because they were lazy.''
''I'm fairly certain that wasn't the case,'' Roderich scolded.
''Nah, I'm just messing around. Those statues were just super expensive. Simple as that. They were all colored as well, you know? When we think of sculptures from ancient times, we probably think of white marble, but in our time, they've found traces of paint and gold on them, so we can say for sure that they were colored a long time ago.''
Although Roderich knew this already, he was still astonished at the man's knowledge. Just moments ago, he'd thought the man knew next to nothing about culture or art. ''How do you know all this, Gilbert?''
''Because I'm old and wise,'' he shrugged, as if that explained everything. He started walking towards the city's center.
Roderich, not following the man's logic in the slightest, decided to drop the subject and focused on Gilbert instead, as to not lose him in the crowd. ''Gil! Where are you going?''
''Well, you know what they say,'' Gilbert shouted back. ''When in Rome, do as the Romans do!''
Since Rome was a cosmopolitan city with Greek, Spaniards, Britons and a lot of other nationalities, a lot of languages could be heard while they roamed the streets. They could see men working at various trades, for example bakers, carpenters and fishmongers. A few women were seen working as hairdressers or dressmakers. Not everyone looked that happy with their job, though. A lot of the menial jobs were performed by slaves, as well as many of the professions such as doctors, teachers and architects.
''The majority of Roman citizens lived in these apartment buildings,'' Gilbert explained, pointing animatedly at everything around him, almost poking Roderich's eye out. ''They were also called 'insulae' and most of them were over-crowded and extremely dangerous. There was always a chance of fire or collapse, which caused the people to live in fear. Help couldn't be given easily, and the government couldn't care less about that. Designing straight or wide streets? Nope! These unpaved streets are really narrow. They changed that after the great fire under Emperor Nero, because only after the fire, the streets were widened. They also built balconies, so people could escape more easily.''
''I didn't know that. I've read somewhere that they had a sewer system, correct?'' Roderich asked.
''Yep, although it only first appeared in the sixth century BC. Also, the upper floors of these apartments couldn't use it. Only the lower floors, where the rich people lived, had running water and indoor toilets. Let's just say that the poorest citizens had the best view of the city,'' Gilbert said, laughing.
Roderich nodded and looked up at one of the buildings. ''The architecture was certainly exquisite. You often came across semi-circular arches and small paired windows. Most of the buildings had a robust appearance and in later eras this style would change to Gothic.''
Gilbert kept up his smile. ''I don't care.''
Roderich swatted at the man's arm, who tried to avoid him by jumping away, doing a little dance in the progress. Roderich shook his head and said. ''Cultura animi.''
''What? Cultured anime?'' Gilbert blurted out, confused by the sudden Latin.
''It means 'Cultivation of the soul' and it's part of a quote from Cicero. You should read his work some time, would be good for you. The quote perfectly describes how Romans thought about Greek culture and education, which they respected greatly. You can see it in their theater, sculptures and paintings, but mostly in their architecture, of course.''
''Sounds incredibly boring.''
Roderich threw his hands up in the air, decided to give up on trying to educate the Prussian and stopped for a moment to look around. It seemed to be late in the afternoon and the sky was colored with orange and pink streaks. This part of the city was a little more quiet, and gave the men a nice break from the busy life within the city.
''You know, this is actually pretty fun,'' Gilbert said suddenly. ''Seeing all this old stuff… I mean, we know so many stories from the past, but so little were written down. Well, they're written down now, in our time, but you know what I mean.''
''Not exactly. Please, elaborate,'' Roderich said, frowning.
''How to explain this… Er, you know the Alexander Sarcophagus?''
Roderich was taken aback. ''Yes. I'm kind of surprised that you do, to be honest.''
Gilbert looked at him triumphantly. ''Don't underestimate me, Roddy. But to get back to topic, that sarcophagus had these relief carvings of Alexander the Great. Er, when was it made, again?'' He looked questioningly at Roderich.
''I believe it was somewhere in the 4th century BC,'' the man replied. ''In the Hellenistic style.''
''Okay. Well, we know a lot about this Alexander guy, right? It was such a long time ago, so how do we know? They didn't write everything down. What I mean is, we can tell a lot by just looking at his sarcophagus. Those reliefs tell the stories! You can see him hunting lions with his alliances and see him fight the Persians. How cool is that?''
''Ah, I think I understand now.''
''You better, I'm not gonna repeat myself,'' Gilbert chuckled. ''I just think that history isn't merely told in words, but mostly in images. We're still finding artifacts from the past and every little thing is another piece of the puzzle.''
Roderich found himself impressed by the way the man was thinking. ''Is that why you don't want to read about history?''
Gilbert turned and looked at him indignantly. ''I do read about history, just not your old dusty books about art. You can ask me all about war and vital regions of important countries, but I'm just not that interested in old statues and paintings. Although,'' he added, ''I must admit that I'm getting more interested in architecture and theater, especially because I didn't really think of them as art before now.''
''I'm glad to hear that,'' Roderich said, smiling. ''Well, not about the fact that you didn't consider them as art, but that you're finally realizing that art can be interesting.''
''Don't blow it out of proportions, Roddy,'' Gilbert huffed. ''I'm still not as thrilled about a piece of rock as you can be at times.''
''Right, right. You'll learn,'' the Austrian said, laughing. ''And I hate to break it to you, but it's time for us to go to our last destination for today, which is the Middle Ages, if I recall correctly.''
''Oh,'' Gilbert said, pouting a little bit. ''Last one?''
''Yes, only one more to go and we're done,'' Roderich said, pressing the button and thus changing the scene abruptly. ''Here we are.''
They were standing in the back of a Catholic church. Roderich immediately noticed the splendid architecture. After all, the better and richer the church looked, the more they believed it was praising God.
''Did we have to appear inside a church?'' Gilbert whispered, as to not disturb the men in front of them, who were bowing and chanting psalms.
''What are you whispering for? They can't hear us,'' Roderich said. He narrowed his eyes and looked at the other man, who appeared a little nervous all of a sudden. ''Wait a minute… Gilbert, are you religious?''
''W-what if I am?'' Gilbert stammered. ''Nothing wrong with that. Probably means I know more about this era than you do.''
''Alright,'' the Austrian said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. ''Tell me all you know,'' he demanded.
Gilbert took a deep breath. ''Well, when the Roman Empire fell some years ago, Germanic peoples took over pretty much all of Europe. They called them barbarians,'' he grimaced. ''Roman temples were converted into churches. There's even a sarcophagus which shows Jesus standing on a Roman God.
''There was a long time period in which people lived without laws. There was a lot of violence and because of both cultural and economic deterioration, people lived in an agriculture. Don't ask me how we know all this, because there was a scarcity of written record.
''People generally lived poor lives and were scared pretty much all of the time. Not only they were scared of the church, who made them fear God with stuff like 'memento mori', which basically meant that you need to dedicate your whole life to God or you'll land in hell–''
''I'm sure that's not exactly what they–''
''I wasn't done yet,'' Gilbert said sternly. ''People were also scared of invasions. There was a constant threat from Vikings, Saracens an Hungarians. Now, let me tell you, I know a Hungarian and those are badass.''
''Oh, trust me, I know,'' Roderich murmured.
''Now, there was one smart guy who thought this was a stupid way of living. That guy was king Charlemagne and he unified his empire. That way, he had a bit more control over his people. He even had people working for his people, which was how they kept some sense of stability. That was called, er…''
''Feudalism,'' Roderich provided.
Gilbert pointed at him, enthusiastically. ''Yes, that! There were three social classes. The church was the most important one, then came the nobles and knights and lastly the peasants. The peasants made up, like, ninety percent of the whole population, but apparently they weren't seen as anything important. They did the dirty jobs, so the other classes could lead a rich life. Most of them weren't schooled, either, so they couldn't even read. They let the church think for them, the idiots.'' He shook his head.
Roderich hadn't moved an inch during the man's monologue. ''You're right,'' he said, making Gilbert look up at him. ''You do seem to know a lot about the Middle Ages. I-I'm impressed, actually.''
Gilbert flashed him the biggest grin he'd seen so far. ''Told ya,'' he said proudly, earning him a small smile from Roderich, who then decided to turn his attention to the church again, asking himself: ''Why do people sing in church?''
Gilbert knew the answer. ''They believe that the people and angels in heaven are always singing. They want to be as close to heaven as humanly possible and that's why they sing. The closer to God, the better. That's also why they designed the church like this, with all those high windows. Light was considered holy.''
Roderich hummed to show he understood and asked what the men were singing about.
Gilbert seemed to listen intently, a concentrated look on his face. Roderich wondered how a man could change so fast. He seldom saw this more serious side of the Prussian.
''It's a Gregorian chant,'' Gilbert declared after a minute. ''They're singing phrases from the Bible, in Latin, I think. It is sung monophonic, which means that there's only a melody without chords or accompanying harmony, which came years and years later,'' he explained thoughtfully, before looking at Roderich and seeing the shocked expression on the man's face. ''What? Was I wrong?''
N-no,'' the Austrian stuttered, flabbergasted. ''You just– I mean– Every time I try to teach you something related to music, you act like a five year old and find another way to annoy me!'' he blurted out.
''Er, that's because most of the time I already know everything you're telling me,'' Gilbert said, awkwardly running a hand through his hair.
''Are you kidding me? You could've at least told me!'' Roderich fretted, exasperated.
''Roddy, calm down,'' Gilbert tried, stifling a laugh behind his hand. ''Let's step outside for a moment, alright?'' He walked towards the entrance of the church and made his way out, Roderich trailing a little behind, muttering angrily to himself all the while.
After walking around town for a bit, the men found out that there was a traveling theater a few blocks away. They hurried to join the crowd and this time, it was Roderich who had some information to share.
''This sort of theater was very common in medieval Europe,'' he began, still a bit grumpily. ''It was understandable for the peasants, as most of them didn't speak Latin. These theaters showed them scenes from the Bible, mostly about Jesus. The moral of the story was very important to them and although this form of theater was very simple, they did have quite the influence. So much, even, that they weren't allowed to perform inside the church anymore, but had to do it on the streets.''
''Which is exactly what we're looking at right now,'' Gilbert finished. He already knew the story they were performing, however, and got bored pretty quickly. ''Hey, what about statues?''
''Beg your pardon?'' Roderich asked, caught off guard by the random question.
''Everywhere we've been so far we've seen statues or sculptures or whatever.''
''There were statues inside the church,'' Roderich suggested.
''Those do not count. They're basically part of the building. What about paintings?''
Roderich smirked. ''Finally getting interested?''
''Sure,'' Gilbert deadpanned.
Roderich thought hard for a moment and he perked up a bit when he got an idea. ''Almost every painting that was made around this time had a didactic function, meaning that it would teach people something, especially the ones that weren't schooled. That's why you'll find most statues in and around churches.''
He sighed. ''How about we continue our trip tomorrow? We've been traveling for hours now and I could do with some rest. I think the MTTD has picked up enough information. I'll send the data to Ludwig as soon as we're back.''
Gilbert stepped towards him and ruffled his hair. ''Aw, is little Roddy tired already?''
''D-don't do that!'' Roderich yelped, flustered, swatting at his hands.
Gilbert laughed and threw his arm around the man's shoulder. Roderich was too surprised by the motion to realize that the man had grabbed the MTTD and was now pressing the button, sending them both back to the present. The next moment, they were standing in their office.
Roderich freed himself from the Prussian's embrace and tiredly collapsed in a nearby chair.
''So,'' Gilbert said. ''Tomorrow, huh?''
''Tomorrow,'' Roderich repeated.
''Alright,'' the man smirked. ''It's a date.''
To be continued, maybe…
Sources
My notes
Algemene Kunstgeschiedenis – Hugh Honour & John Fleming
Several Wikipedia sites
Cracked dot com
History dot com
AncientGreece dot com
Ancient dot eu / Rome
HistoryLearningSite dot co dot uk
Medieval-life-and-times dot info / medieval-art
