Date : 12.04.18

Title : Memory In My Heart

Author : ElaineDex

Chapter : 1of ?

Rating : M

Pairings : Bucky/OC

Warnings : Some Sexual Content, Romance, Angst, Maybe Some Strong Language.

Spoilers and A/N: Possible references to The Winter Soldier, Civil War, Black Panther (I have not seen Black Panther, nor do I claim to be an expert on The Avengers so please forgive any discrepencies. I am working off of things I have read and movies and trailers that I have seen. Thank you.

Disclaimer : I do not own anything to do with the Marvel franchise. This plot and any O/C's are mine.

Summary : (AU) Can a memory from Bucky's time as The Winter Soldier save him from having to live that kind of life again or will the darkness consume him and lead him to kill everyone he now holds dear?

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Six Months After Civil War

"How did this happen?" Captain Steve Rogers asked of T'Challa and his sister, Shuri as they stood in the centre of the wrecked lab in Wakanda.

Shuri bowed her head guiltily and Steve softened his expression as T'Challa sighed.

"I do not know," he replied, his voice tense, "But I can assure you, I intend to find out."

Steve nodded and raked a hand through his hair. T'Challa had been away on business when Shuri's science lab had been attacked by seemingly invisible assassins and unsurprisingly their target had been Bucky.

"It has to be your Government does it not?" T'Challa asked as Steve brooded.

"Why them?" Steve eventually asked and T'Challa gave a rueful smile.

"Because nothing besides your friend has been taken…and because Tony Stark has more reason than anyone to come for him."

"You think Tony did this?" Steve asked, shock clear on his face. He hadn't thought his old friend would resort to measures like this just to get to Bucky, but what if he had? After a moment or two he shook his head though, answering his own question as he said, "No. If this was Tony we'd be looking at Bucky's body right now, not an empty cryo chamber."

T'Challa nodded then said, "I will begin to make inquiries. You are welcome to stay as long as you need…I will be in touch."

Steve held out his hand and T'Challa shook it.

"Thank you and I'm sorry…for this…" Steve said, indicating to the ruined lab.

"'Tis not I who requires that particular apology," T'Challa smiled before leaving Steve with Shuri.

When they were alone, Steve opened his mouth to repeat his words, but Shuri held up a hand and began to lead him toward windows that overlooked a vast plane of land. They stood for a moment, taking in the majestic view before Shuri spoke.

"Sergeant Barnes and I hadn't really began work on his rehabilitation. I had ideas, plans, but we had only just taken him out of cryogenic sleep a few days ago and we were letting him recover."

Steve nodded, reluctant to speak, wanting her to continue.

"It was strange," Shuri began again, "It was almost as though he sensed something…"

"What do you mean?" Steve couldn't help but ask.

"He wrote you something," Shuri replied, reaching into a pocket concealed within her robe. "He asked if I would ensure you received it should anything like this happen." She ran her fingers over the envelope for a moment before handing it to Steve, keeping hold of one end when Steve grasped the other.

"You must find him Captain…I fear for him."

Steve nodded, worry for his friend creeping into his own heart and somehow he managed to wait until Shuri left him alone before he tore open the letter.

Steve

If you're reading this then I guess my concerns weren't so unfounded after all. I don't want you to put yourself in danger coming for me, but knowing the Steve that I do I know you will anyway.

Steve couldn't help the small smile that tilted the corners of his mouth before he continued to read.

If the US have me, then they may use the same team of scientists and doctors that HYDRA did - maybe its a long shot, I dunno, but if it's the case there was one Doc who might be willing to help. She was there every time I returned from the more recent missions. She was different, kind, things didn't hurt quite so much with her around. She was there, in Washington, when S.H.I.E.L.D went down. Her name was Molly, she always told me her name, every damn time, but I never answered her. I remembered, but I wasn't kind…I wasn't me. Anyways, I'll ask you again, don't put yourself or your friends in danger for me.

With you to the end of the line…always…Bucky.

Steve tilted his head back and closed his eyes.

"And you, Buddy," he whispered, "And you."

OoOoOoO

Doctor Molly Evans placed the hold-all that she'd just packed onto her bed and zipped it up. Debating whether to flee or not had taken her the best part of three days…ever since the letter had arrived informing her that she was needed again. There hadn't really been an option to refuse, but Molly wanted nothing more to do with S.H.I.E.L.D or the Government or the programs they ran. No, she wanted no part of whatever they were planning next…

She shook her head as she thought of the man she'd been instructed to treat the last time. The Winter Soldier they'd called him…it had been horrific…and despite the fact that the Soldier had killed one of her colleagues in the lab when he'd lost control she'd felt compelled to stay, to try and ease his suffering as best she could…after all, it had been her fault…

The doorbell rang, jolting her from her thoughts and frowning, knowing she wasn't expecting anyone, not just yet anyways, she picked up the hold-all and stuffed it beneath the bed. Heading downstairs, she composed herself behind the front door, trying to not look like she was about to run away before she opened it, her brows furrowing as a tall, broad-shouldered man, holding a toolbox and wearing a baseball cap turned to face her.

Her mouth formed an 'O' as the man removed his sunglasses and she recognised him.

"Captain Rogers…" she said.

T'Challa's intel had confirmed his theory, that the US Government was indeed behind Bucky's kidnapping and after some digging and a little help from his friends, Cap had located the Scientist. The first thing Steve noticed about the woman Bucky had wanted him to find, aside from the shocking difference in their height (the top of her head barely reached the middle of his chest) was her hair and the way it bounced around her shoulders in beautiful auburn curls. Internally he shook his head…Bucky always did love a redhead.

"Doctor Evans?" he asked and when she nodded he said, "May I come in….?" and he glanced around, hoping she got that he didn't want to talk on her doorstep.

Molly stepped back and indicated he enter her home and as he passed her she closed the door and said, "I heard you'd gone rogue, but I didn't think that involved being a handyman…"

She offered him a quizzical smile and he removed the baseball cap, laughing just a little.

"The best I could come up with on short notice…" he said, then nodding toward the kitchen he asked, "Can we sit down?"

Molly shrugged, "Sure…" and led the way through, pulling out a chair and sitting down, wondering what on earth Captain America wanted with her. As he joined her, Steve said, "I believe that you used to work on The Winter Soldier program at S.H.I.E.L.D…"

As he paused, Molly's heart sank and she nodded, "That's right…and after what happened in Washington I stayed on long enough to help with the clean-up then I quit…"

Steve saw the apprehensive look on her face and quickly pressed on, "I have reason to think that you may be contacted again…" but he stopped as she shook her head.

"I already have been, but there is no way I am going back there…I can't…the things I…we…did…" she closed her eyes, "…I just finished packing, I'm leaving before the car comes for me later…"

Steve swallowed. "They have Sergeant Barnes again…Bucky…my friend…he told me to find you…he remembered you; said you were kind to him…"

Molly's breath hitched as Captain Rogers called the Soldier by his real name and her heart pounded in her chest when he told her that he remembered her.

"I…." she began, uncertain how to respond as memories of her time with the Program filled her mind again. "I felt bad for him…what they did to him." She stopped for a moment, looking at Steve before glancing away. "After the mission where he was sent to target you and Black Widow he was different…erratic…he killed one of my colleagues…"

"I'm sorry…" Steve began, but Molly cut him off. "You don't understand," she said, "It was my fault…I thought I was helping…" she shook her head and bit her bottom lip.

Steve reached across the small kitchen table and touched her arm.

"Help me to understand," he said, "Tell me what happened…"

Molly hesitated, but eventually she took a breath and said, "It wasn't what I signed up for. I hated what they did to him each time he returned; the beatings, the mind wiping…he was in a lot of pain…" she pinched at the bridge of her nose, the images of the time vivid in her minds eye.

"I managed to find a way to reduce the severity of the 'brainwashing', so that each time he would retain something instead of losing everything he'd just experienced. I didn't tell anyone what I was doing of course and when he returned from fighting you it was a real breakthrough…though Pierce didn't see it that way. Sergeant Barnes said he knew you…that you knew him… My colleague was trying to repair his arm at the time, but he became agitated and angry, Barnes flipped and threw him across the room…"

She took a moment before she went on.

"It was my fault. If I hadn't reduced the dosage…"

Steve squeezed her arm.

"It was because of you that Bucky realised that there was something more to him…something better out there…that he wasn't just a killer. He wanted to find out about himself, about who he used to be, to get better. He got away from HYDRA because of you."

Molly looked skeptical.

"Hardly," she replied and Steve decided to bite the bullet.

"I need your help Doctor Evans…I know it's a lot to ask, that you don't want to go back, but you're the only plan I have to free Bucky right now. I have things worked out to minimise danger to you and…" he paused as Molly stood and he could see that she was about to say no and so he stood too and pulled the letter Bucky had written and passed it to her.

Against her better judgement, Molly lowered her eyes to the paper and read the lines, her head and heart switching places when Bucky mentioned her. She had feelings that she shouldn't, had done for some time and she knew she shouldn't let them cloud her decisions.

When she was done reading and thinking she rested her hands against the back of one of the kitchen chairs and sighed deeply.

"Alright….what do I have to do?"

OoOoOoO

When Bucky woke he felt groggy, but as he came to he realised that he was shackled to an operating table. He opened his eyes, anger growing inside of him when he saw that he was in some kind of lab, but he knew instinctively that he was no longer in Wakanda. It was then that he felt the pain on his left side and turning his head he saw the gleaming metal of a new cybernetic arm.

He let out a cry of pure rage, making the scientists working at nearby stations jump in fright and then he heard a voice he didn't recognise from somewhere behind him.

"Welcome back Sergeant Barnes…"

End of Chapter One