Chapter One: Introductions.

Disclaimer: None of this Harry Potter stuff is mine, sniff.

Snape looked at me and I looked at him.

"How the hell did you get out of my computer?" I mustered, trying to sound strong.

Snape sneered, "I wasn't in your computer, you silly girl. I read your fic."

"Oh?" I was genuinely surprised, " Which one?"

"The one where Hermione got shot, due to Ronald Weasly, out of a chimney."

Now this, I had not expected. Not only had I posted that fic well over a couple of years ago now, but it was most certainly deleted….. as this certain website is very mean to people who don't get 'bumped'….. Know which one it was? Good.

"But Sev," he scowled, "erus," he was still scowling but I continued anyway, " how could you have read that story? It was deleted like forever ago."

"Your friend Kaitylan gave me a copy, it was quite amusing – really. Dumbledore in a chicken suit…." He was actually chuckling, and it made me smile. "She reminds me of the real Hermione Granger for some reason."

"Oh yeah, well when we picked 'character names' for ourselves when the series was still in its early stages she picked her. Although she is rather bummed that Hermione went for Ron, she would've much rather it had been Harry." I replied, hoping he wouldn't ask me which name I had at first picked.

"How appropriate. And you picked?" I took a deep breath and then squeaked out,

"Lavender Brown."Snape's eyebrows shot through the roof, and he scooted slightly away from me – as if afraid his face might get sucked off. I nodded at him and said, " And then after the slobber-fest I changed my name to Ginny."

"Ah…. Potter's girlfriend." Snape sneered maliciously.

"No," Snape raised an unbelieving eyebrow, "It's just that she's ten times less likely to make out with Ron than anyone else."

Snape snorted – he hadn't been expecting that. "So then, which character do you fancy? If it's not Ron, or Harry then….. Draco?"

"Icky, icky, ew, ew, NO!" I replied, realizing that I must sound like a two year old twit to Snape. He, however, looked mildly offended.

"We Slytherins are not all bad, you know." He said softly.

"I know. In fact I like a Slytherin." I replied, staying as mysterious as I could.

This declaration really made Snape's eyebrows go through the roof. Then he seemed to go into deep consideration until he said, "Give me a hint."

"He's tall, dark, and handsome."

"Oh Merlin, not Crabbe!"

"EW! WORSE THAN DRACO!" I yelped, slightly insulted.

Snape shrugged, then seemed to realize he was talking to a stranger about her love interests and returned to being his cold, sarcastic self. He smiled nastily and said, "Just so you know, Hagrid was not in Slytherin."

"Oh ho, very funny Sevvie-kins!" That earned me a murderous glare.

"Well, who is it – or are you just pulling my leg that it's a Slytherin?" he snarled, determinedly stalking around the room.

I smiled serenely, 'Here comes the big blow, Severus' I thought. "Oh come now, surely you've realized that it's you. You're a master at Legilimency!"

Snape looked stunned, either that it was him, or that he hadn't thought of using Legilimens. "I-it's me?" he sputtered, clearly unbelieving.

"Yuppers." He still looked unconvinced, so I hugged him.

"Hey! Hey, now. Stop!" he growled shakily. "I said STOP!" and he pried me off him with his bony fingers.

"What made you come here?" I was suddenly curious, " Was it just the fic, or?"

"No….. as you may or may not know the Final Battle is over and the Light won. Potter, however, is pissed that I was such a ….. 'git who also happened to have killed Dumbledore, which was really mean even though he ordered you to' as he put it – well, anyway, he says that I should have to spend a month with a muggle. He sent me here and for some reason ordered me to visit your friend before taking up residence with you."

"Well, that's odd that he sent you to her….. I really can't figure out why."

"I guess we'll find out later. In the meantime, can I have something to eat? Fluing takes a lot out of you."

"Certainly." And I made us both grilled cheese sandwiches.

A/N: Well, that's the first chapter – hope you enjoyed it! More to come soon! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE WITH SUGAR ON TOP, REVIEW!