DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, any characters affiliated...and I'm too lazy to think up anything else that I don't own. But I'm not too lazy to look up what Shikamaru says in Japanese...(opens other internet browser)

A/N: This is me, rambling along, because I was bored and I didn't want to study. Nuke, if you're reading this, I want the material for our sequel! ARGH! (writer's block...angst...)


So I was just sitting here, studiously not doing homework, when a thought occurred to me: "What if they were in our world?" Better yet...in the lovely city. I mean, our world doesn't have chakra and shinobi, and all that fun stuff, so how would they manage?

Ok, for starters, Naruto would not be so peppy. If he were just some random orphan kid on the street, he'd either be in juvie already for delinquency, or simply another angsty kid on the block. Hm...unless Konohamaru was really his brother, and Sarutobi was really his grandfather. Then they'd live in a big mansion somewhere, because Sarutobi-sama would be president. ...or something. And then Naruto's life dream would be to become "PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES! THEN NO-ONE WILL LOOK DOWN ON ME AGAIN!"

Konohamaru would probably be bullied in school because of his long name. Then, either Big Brother Naruto would come in and intervene, or the bullies would just get tired of chanting "Konohamaru" and leave. (Come on...'Konohamaru'? Five syllables? Please.)

Sasuke and his brother Itachi would be interesting. Sasuke, the all-angsty, would have two groups in school that monitored his every move: one would absolutely luv him, and the other would absolutely hate him. Group A would be all swoony and, "Oh, he's so good at everything!", while Group B would be all, "Big, arrogant jerk..." Group B would also be the larger group; after all, some girls (and guys...eeh...) from Group A would snap out of it and see the truth. Or get shut down.

Itachi...I always wonder why the ANBU haven't caught him yet. But I guess he's just that good. So if he were in our world, (1) he'd always be on the run, (2) he'd be breaking hearts right and left, in every country, (3) he'd single-handedly raise the world's crime rate by...oh, I don't know...about 10, and (4) ...yeah, I got nothing. Four just seemed like a nice, rounded number.

And many people's (I can't say everyone's) favourite cherry blossom: Sakura. Future model? Most likely. Or a nurse; nurses tend to be good-looking. In school? Prom queen, social butterfly, school president...definitely. And constantly rivalling against Ino, who would be runner-up, other social butterfly, vice prez...and other campaigner for the school's heartthrob: Sasuke (duh. Who did you expect?) Which one of them do you expect would be president of Group A? Or maybe Group A has two sub-groups: Forehead and Boar.

Where would Kakashi be? Good question; somehow I can see him as a dude that works in Chapters or a library or something. It must be that hentai book he always lugs around. Either that, or a professional athelete; he'd be good at anything. (gasp) or an Abercrombie and Fitch model! Or the face of the FBI! He's just that cool; Kakashi could be anything, so long as it were cool.

Let's think...who else...I've already mentioned Ino...so how about Chouji? ...Chouji's special. The random 'pleasantly plump' person on the block, perhaps? Would he be teased in school as a kid? Probably. But then Shikamaru would walk in and help out in his own passive way. Chouji would probably end up as top wrestler in his school though...

Shikamara would probably drop out of high school. Why? Because he skipped so many classes. I can just see him lying on a picnic bench just off of school property, staring at clouds, instead of inside, learning about the joys of math. Unless he only came into class to do tests and things...and actually wrote the tests. Then he'd pass. Maybe he'd just be homeschooled...and end up skipping that too.

Asuma is the type of guy I can see working in a bar, either as a bouncer, or a bartender. It might just be the cigar, or it might be just me. Oh! And Kurenai could be a waitress! ...Or a model. And then there could be this totally clichéd thing about them meeting in a bar...but it would still be romantic. Or at least cute.

Speaking of cute, Hinata would not be stepped on in school. No. Some really nice guys in school would notice her, and stop that from happening. Or she'd meet a lot of kind friends because Hinata's so special like that. Why did no-one notice her in Konoha! The injustice of it all!

Heh...and Kiba would eventually grow up to be the crazy dog man who chases kids of his property. Not that I have a problem with Kiba; it's just so imaginable. He'd end up as a sort of punk though...with a pack of Rottweilers and Pit bulls as his gang. All of them are perfectly trained, of course; he would only let them attack to save Hinata. Because I like Hinata.

Shino...It's hard to say with this guy. We all know he's a bug-user, so it'd be kind of weird if he didn't have them. He'd end up as either some kind of bug nerd, or this really cool, mysterious dude that examines bugs as a past-time hobby. Probably the latter. For all you people with the ShinoXKiba stuff...I shake my fist at you.

The sound triplets...now they would be really out of place in our world.

Gaara, for example...he wouldn't be Gaara without his sand; he'd end up being some random guy stuck in the mental set that he's a little kid that wants to play in the sandbox all day. ...and will kill anybody who tries to share with him...

Temari would look really odd walking around with that giant fan. She might be an actress or dancer or something along those lines; most of her money would probably go to funding Gaara.

Kankurou, though I shudder to say it, would end up being the type of guy that loves kids; he'd be nothing like the boy in the manga/anime. Why? Isn't it obvious? The puppets! The puppets are everything! Can't you see it? Kankurou doing little puppet shows for kindergarteners!

Lee and Gai would have to be together (not shounen-ai...) If they were separated in our world, both would probably die of incompletion or something. I can't decide if they'd be pro wrestlers, or the ultimate sport jocks, but I do know that Gai would be Lee's beloved trainer. The only problem, is that many a spy would be watching them, wondering if they were doing drugs to get so insanely strong.

Tenten would be the ultimate superspy. She could summon all of her materials, tools, weapons and such, and she'd be able to hack into anywhere with her crazy skills. Can't you see her as a superspy? Because I can.

And Neji would be her partner! He'd still have his Byakugan, and he'd be able to scout out the area and such for Superspy Tenten.

...if anything, Shikamaru is the most normal. 'Nuff said.


A/N: So...how many readers did I lose? ...MENDOKUSE! That's what Shikamaru says! And 'mendokusai' is when he's describing something as troublesome. 'Mendokuse' is just the term like, "Bleh..." or something.