This is a present for the Captain Swan Secret Santa for Hook-Come-Back-To-Me on Tumblr! I had tons of fun getting to know you and wish you all the best! :D

While this was all supposed to be a single one-shot for Christmas, it turned into an 11K monstrosity and it is not even finished yet! So I hope you enjoy the first chapter, as I am hoping the rest will come before New Years! Happy Christmas Katie - wishing you all the best!


December 1st

Emma sits in front of her camera, trying to figure out what to say. What to tell her followers. It is nearing ten PM, and she needs to get a video up tonight.

She promised her followers vlogmas, a fun Christmas-y video every day leading up to the holiday itself. She was going to give them a glimpse into her life more-so than the small little advice videos, DIYs and collaboration videos she usually does. She had promised her followers ways to keep the holiday cheer even when you don't have cheer yourself. Because that is what her followers come to her for. They want to see the person who has nothing come back and make something of herself. They want to see hope, and happiness, and all the things Emma wished she herself could have seen when she was a child.

But now, Emma doesn't even know if she wants to celebrate Christmas. She turns on the camera, sits down on her couch, and yet words don't come. For once in her life, Emma, self proclaimed "Ugly Duckling to Beautiful Swan, with all the advice to get you there too" has absolutely no advice for her followers. Nothing she can say on December 1st.

She opens and closes her mouth a few times, trying to figure out what to say. In the end, it makes sense to just come out with it and say what is on her mind.

"Hi Ducklings," Emma says, smiling at the way she always greets her fans. She didn't name them – they named themselves in some small corner of the internet. Emma is still astounded she even has fans, was more astounded at Vidcon last year when a few hundred came out to meet her. And thus she feels like she owes them an explanation of some sort. So she takes a deep breath, knowing she will edit out this long pause later, and continues.

"Ducklings, I have some news. And it isn't good news. I know I promised you vlogmas and a deeper glimpse into my life. I know I promised real vlogs and following me around and getting to know my day to day life. But, I don't know if I am up for that anymore."

Emma takes a deep breath, wondering how much to share. But she doesn't really have any family telling her not to share, and most of her friends are other vloggers who put everything out there anyways, so why not?

"This morning I was setting up to film my day for vlogmas. I was going to surprise my boyfriend, you guys know Walsh, by stopping in and bringing some cheer to his store with a bit of a home-made DIY. I had that whole video made, ready to put up with the vlog." Emma pauses her talking to grab her home-made mistletoe hat from the floor, lifting it up so the camera can see. "I'm not really that into PDA, or the holidays, or any of that stuff as you guys know. So I thought this would be a cute surprise."

Emma lets out a laugh at her wording, but it isn't a happy laugh. Its one of those laughs Emma has for her life when it seems to go in the same direction as always – into some twisted dark place where she will never be happy.

"Turns out Walsh had already found his mistletoe, and it was underneath the skirt of his mortgage broker." Another one of those laughs releases from Emma's, and she really doesn't know how to stop them. "I forgot he had a meeting this morning. Turns out I didn't really know him at all."

She controls her laughter, stops it for a moment, and takes a deep breath to clear her thoughts. This video is going to need a lot of editing before she posts it.

"So, basically what I am trying to say, is I am sorry Ducklings. I am probably not going to be as Christmasy during vlogmas as you may want. If you have any suggestions of things you want to see, or what you want me to do, let me know. I am up for anything."

She looks straight into the camera, the thoughts of staying in the city with Walsh and his mortgage broker overtaking her. She thinks of of the cutesy videos she had planned (and some she had even pre-recorded) being replaced by 28 days of sad videos of her grieving a relationship that was barely there to begin with. And then an idea forms.

"And if you have suggestions of somewhere cool I can go for the holidays, someone you'd like to see me do a collab with, send me suggestions in the comments. I think with this new idea, Vlogmas will continue as planned. Just, probably not here in Storybrooke. I've got miles, I've got a bit saved up. I'm willing to travel anywhere so send suggestions, I'll find people to collab with, and I'll show you my holiday travels as I do."

A new resolve forms, and Emma releases the most genuine smile she didn't know was still buried inside of herself.

"Thanks, Ducklings. This video was probably going to be much more of a damper, but I think the thought of visiting some new places and old faces may help me bring the holiday cheer back to this time of year. I'll add the video of me making this contraption," Emma holds back up the mistletoe-hat, "in case any of you want to make one too. Perhaps I'll take it with me as I travel, it may cause some fun interactions."

Another genuine smile, and Emma says her usual send-out to her followers. "Until next time, Ducklings. Keep on waddling on!" She waves, then pauses for enough time she'd need to cut the video, before moving to shut off the camera.

Her new resolve overtakes her, and instantly Emma is moving to her laptop to load the video and edit it until it is post-able. She only has a few hours before the day is over, and needs this video rendered and up before December 1st is over. She is excited to see who her followers suggest she sees and knows exactly what tomorrow's video will be – choosing who to visit and attempting communication with them. Perhaps booking flights, and travel. The adventure bug has caught on, and Emma almost forgets everything else that happened today.

This holiday season is looking up already.

December 2nd:

Emma sleeps in, even when she is itching to wake up and see what her viewers are suggesting. She even sent out a tweet with the link to the video, asking her followers on twitter for suggestions too. But after that, she turned off her computer and phone, completely blocking out any and all notifications, so that she could properly go through them in the morning.

Her mind won't shut down though, dreaming of vloggers she wishes knew she existed wanting to collaborate, or vloggers she met at Vidcon with just as small a fanbase as her who may be more acceptable for collaborations. She already knows she will start with a small roadtrip to her nearby vlogging friends, Mulan (who usually does self-defence videos and social activism), and Mary Margaret and David (who have cutesy relationship related videos). But after that, she is kind of at a blank and is really relying on her followers. Mostly, she wants them to suggest someone really far away from where she lives so that she can go far away from Walsh and let him clear his stuff out from her apartment when she is decidedly not in town.

She wants to do this not only for herself, though, but for her fans. So once Emma finally allows herself out of bed, she takes her time showering and eating breakfast, setting up her laptop with her camera on her so she can record her genuine reactions to all the suggestions.

Finally set up, Emma makes sure her camera is plugged into the wall and checks that she has a fresh memory card installed. Then she makes sure it is facing the right way, clicks record, and moves back over to her desk where she can both vlog and read the viewer's suggestions at the same time.

"Hi Ducklings!" Emma says, turning her phone while she continues talking. "I haven't opened my computer since I posted yesterday's video, so I hope there are suggestions waiting for me! I am going to record my reactions to all of them and make this vlogmas video number two. Hopefully by tomorrow I'll already be on the road and on my way to a collaboration!"

Her phone loads, and instantly begins pinging with new texts.

"Let's start with my friends, see who is interested, and then I'll jump over to the comments on my last video and twitter!"

She lets out a laugh at the text from Mary Margaret, telling her she is a-ok to visit for as long as she needs. She can even plan a collab-Disney trip if they want because that should perk them both up. Emma reads the texts out loud, going through one from David and another from Mulan suggesting the same thing.

When she turns to twitter, though, that is when things begin to get interesting. There are a ton of messages requesting she collaborate with someone named "Killian the Pirate" – and for a moment Emma is really confused as to why her fans want her to meet this weirdo until she sees the image they are all tweeting out.

It's from Vidcon, one photo Emma was pulled into during a night of partying where a man clad in head-to-toe leather with eyeliner on is pulling her tight, his lips kissing her cheek. Apparently one photo is enough to get your fans shipping you. Emma tries to remember more about this guy, the only interaction she can recollect being when he offered her some rum from a flask he pulled out of his coat. The rest is a blur.

"Well," Emma says with a laugh, turning up to face her computer. "Seems a lot of you want me to go meet this guy Killian the Pirate." Emma reads out a few of the tweets, remembering to take screen caps of them to put next to her in the video. "I'll contact him over twitter, but if you watch these videos Mr. Pirate, consider this an open invitation to have me on your ship for Christmas." Emma pauses for another minute, then lets out a groan. "And I just realized how awful that sounds so let's record that again. This video will have tons of edits."

She ends up recording a new formal invitation to Killian the Pirate, also adding in how she will probably be road-tripping until she manages to figure out where said pirate lives, but how she is excited for what is to come.

"Until next time, Ducklings! Keep waddling on!"

December 5th

The next two days of videos involve Emma packing and travelling, the first vlog chronicling her decorating the bug for Christmas so she can take the holidays with her on the road trip, and the second an adventure through a mall with the mistletoe hat on. People in the mall seemed to think it was a lot funnier than Walsh did. She received a great many kisses on the cheek, and even convinced some shoppers to wear it and surprise their significant other, gaining some adorable moments for her video.

By December 5th, Emma has made it to Mary Margaret and David's small apartment, ready to film some videos to satisfy her viewers for the next two or three days. She is about to get started, the camera all set up and facing them as she and Mary Margaret get ready to chronicle their holiday baking, when Emma's phone lights up with a message.

"Oh, you should get that, Emma!" Mary Margaret says, rearranging the ingredients in front of them. "Could be important!"

Emma rolls her eyes, turning to face her friend. "I am sure it's nothing. It can wait until after we bake these-"

But Emma doesn't finish her sentence. Because her phone begins to ping continuously, notification after notification coming through. "Yeah, I should maybe look at that."

Mary Margaret gives Emma a smug look, but then makes sure to turn the camera on as Emma goes to check her phone. She arranges the camera so it is on Emma, catching her reaction to the events unfolding.

"What is it? What happened?" Mary Margaret says, her eyes shining with glee as she watches Emma's face go from confused to amused to worried back to something akin to excitement.

"Well, twitter is blowing up because apparently, I got comment on that second Vlogmas video…" Emma says, pausing for dramatic effect before adding in, "from Killian the Pirate."

Mary Margaret lets out a squeal of glee. "He's the one from Vidcon, right? With the rum?"

Emma freezes, turning to look at Mary Margaret. "Wait, did something happen that night? Because literally all I can remember is the guy pulling rum out of his leather coat and offering it to me. Then we all got tequila shots and…"

"Well, you kind of thought he was an ass. An endearing ass, but nevertheless…" Mary Margaret doesn't continue, and Emma rolls her eyes at her friend's antics.

"He dresses up like a pirate for views. I think he'd be a guy I find an ass." Emma replies, laughing as her phone continues to ping with new twitter notifications. Apparently her fans are quite excited about this newly made connection.

"What did it say though, the message?" asks Mary Margaret.

Emma turns her phone towards Mary Margaret, only then noticing that her camera is now recording. She pulls the phone back angrily, glaring at her friend.

"You are recording this? Mary Margaret!"

"Oh, come on, Emma. This'll be a much better video for your fans than our dumb baking! Look at how excited they are about you potentially meeting this pirate guy? Now quit stalling and tell me what he says!"

Emma rolls her eyes, pulling the comment back up. "He says, and I quote, 'I'd be honoured to have a Swan as my first mate this holiday season, love. Send me a message and we will figure something out. Hope you enjoy trans-continental flights, though. I don't think I could sail from London in time to make Christmas.'"

"London? You're going to fly all the way to London?" Mary Margaret asks.

Emma shrugs, looking into the camera. "What do you say, Ducklings? Should I travel all the way to London for this? I have never been across the ocean, this might be kind of fun!"

"Emma, are you sure you want to travel across the world to meet someone you have barely met just for a youtube video?" Mary Margaret asks, concern written all over her face.

"You were super excited before when you didn't know where he lived," Emma argues.

"Well, that was when I thought I'd be within "save-Emma from the weird pirate" distance," Mary Margaret jokes. But then the concern is back. "Is this really what you want to do? Run away from your relationship issues, and be alone on Christmas?"

Emma turns to face her friend, feeling more okay about this than anything she's ever done. "Yeah. London seems like a good place to spend Christmas. And while I have you and David here, I really am on my own all the time. I'll be okay on my own over there too. I've had lonelier Christmases than this one may turn out to be." She turns back to her phone, pulling up one of Killan the Pirate's videos. This one has him as a pirate trying to navigate a grocery store. "Besides, this could be kind of fun."

Emma sends off a quick direct message to Killian the Pirate's twitter handle, hoping to connect themselves in some way. Even If they only film one or two videos together, a Christmas alone in London (and two weeks away from the craptastic spectacular that is her current life) sound absolutely perfect.

December 8th

After a few more videos with Mary Margaret and David, Emma drives back home to pack her stuff up. She spends most of her free time watching Killian the Pirate's videos. They are actually pretty fun, when you get over the amount of rum he drinks in them and how cocky he acts. Most are showing him as a pirate dealing with modern day issues. "Pirate does laundry" and "Pirate attempts to take a bus" (which involved him trying to commandeer the bus, not actually ride it) are probably some of Emma's favourites.

She also communicates a little with Killian the Pirate himself, adding each other on twitter and sending direct messages. They've coordinated when she will be coming, a few ideas on collaborations, and getting Emma a hotel to stay in close by. He has even suggested some fun things for Emma to do in her downtime in the city (and for now Emma is just casually ignoring how he suggests everything with the caption of "I can't wait to show you…"). Now, all packed and ready, Emma is spending her last night in the states with her friend Mulan filming a few videos to add to her channel during the two days of travel it will take to get to London (doesn't help that the cheapest flights Emma could find re-route her through both New York and Germany).

"Thanks again for letting me crash for the night," Emma says, walking with Mulan into the aerobics studio together. "I didn't realize how much this trip is digging into my savings until I found out how much hotels in London cost. So seriously, you're doing me the biggest favour."

"It's no problem," Mulan says with a shrug, dropping her bag down and taking out some hand-wraps. "Besides, I kind of missed your spunk, with you being so far from LA and all that."

"Four hours isn't that far away," Emma laughs, adding in an eyeroll for emphasis. She smirks at her friend as she begins to set up her camera.

"Well London is pretty far away," Mulan says, stretching out in place. "And a completely new city, with new random guys to come chasing after you." Emma doesn't reply, continuing to fiddle with setting on her camera, making sure it is steady on the tripod. "New pirates to come chasing after you…"

"Excuse me?" Emma asks, turning around to face Mulan, a scowl on her face. "What does that mean?"

"Oh, come on," Mulan replies, "I've seen what Killian the Pirate posted on his twitter. Nice quip about a visiting swan and an upcoming collaboration he is super excited about? What about the Instagram photo he sent out of you guys at that party at vidcon last year?"

Emma shakes her head at her friend's antics. "Oh, that was nothing. Just some self-promo to get some of my fans to watch his videos prior to us making some together."

"Oh, and all the comments about places in London you should go? His favourite bars, and local clubs, and museums? How he would love to go visit the Harry Potter exhibit again and has been looking for an excuse to go without seeming too obsessed?"

"He's just being friendly," Emma says, finally getting her camera ready. "Besides, he seems really sweet in those messages. Nothing like the pirate persona he lets out."

"Sure, sure," Mulan replies, moving to set her own camera up as well. "But I just want you to be careful Emma."

"That's why we are filming this video, isn't it? Self-defence for the solo female traveller around Christmas time? You'll show me everything I don't already know about how to defend myself from hooligans, scoundrels, and, yes, pirates."

"I wasn't talking about your body, girl. I was talking about your heart."

Emma blanches, not sure what to say to that. She opens her mouth a few times, trying to find words, but nothing comes out.

"I know you, Emma. He seems like your type. Especially your re-bound type. Just be careful, okay?"

"When am I ever not careful?" Emma asks. But something in Mulan's words get to her. As they film the video, showing ways to protect yourself from people trying to steal your purse, or how to punch a guy out who is coming on too strong, or how to give a guy a "Jolly Holiday" (essentially flip the drinks between you two once you know he spiked yours – come on, she needs some sort of holiday theme to today's video), Emma's mind races. She wonders about this guy, and how she really knows absolutely nothing about him. And how, even though he is in the youtube community with her, they have only ever interacted at that one party. And, she is essentially flying across the world to meet a stranger after getting her heart broken and – well – it all starts feeling like a horrible idea.

It isn't until Emma is laying on Mulan's couch a little before midnight, still awake before her early morning flight because her video is still rendering, only really planning on continuing this strange plan because she posted it on youtube and the flights are non-refundable, when Emma's phone lights up with a ping.

"I am sure you're asleep, but I wish you the safest of travels to my side of the pond. I've linked you a few funny videos to watch on the long flight over (that is, if there is wifi). Otherwise, safe travels and I'll see you when you arrive on my ship for our myriad of youtube adventures. – Killian"

The direct message is sweet, and Emma decides to focus on that instead of everything else that could go wrong in the course of this adventure. She can be paranoid another day.

December 10th

Emma's flights to London are hell, being squished in a middle seat beside a man who probably hadn't showered in days and a mother with her baby that screamed most of the flight. Not to mention the flight from Germany was delayed, her baggage was lost somewhere in transit, and by the time she got her luggage back and travelled to her hotel, she only had about an hour before she had to meet Killian on his boat. Add that to not sleeping for the past 36 hours and you have one un-happy camper.

It takes Emma the full hour to quickly shower, throw on some make-up (so she doesn't look like she has been up for 36 hours) and catch a cab to get her to the marina. She doesn't think Killian will be mad when she is late, but then again she doesn't really know him or know what to expect.

Emma figures the first video should be something unscripted, more vlog-style, so she pulls out her camera and begins filming herself as she walks the marina, scanning for the name of the boat Killian had given her.

"Hello Ducklings, from London! Also, from the worst plane-ride of my life and then some. Transcontinental travel is not fun! You'll see when I post the travel vlogs." She pauses for a moment, scanning the boats nearby, but doesn't see the one she is looking for so she keeps talking to the camera.

"As you can see, I am at a marina. And what is usually at a marina? Well, a ship of course. And… I sound like an idiot. Okay. Try again." Emma takes a deep breath, scanning again, and then smiles back to her camera. "As you can see, I am searching for something in particular. A boat, of sorts. Belongs to a certain pirate captain. You guys may have heard of him."

She turns the camera, scanning the marina to give her viewers a glimpse of the boats (or at least a glimpse she may be able to edit and use somehow). "I can't seem to find the one I am looking for, so maybe I should just-"

Her thoughts are interrupted by a loud voice. "Mr. Smee! I believe we have found us our Swan! Bring her aboard deck, I think she needs to speak to the Captain!"

Emma twirls around, unsure what to do. Killian is there, leaning off the mast of the ship like some goddamn circus artist. Mr. Smee, a small portley fellow, is running down the gangway towards her, the hat on his head reminiscent of his namesake from the Peter Pan movies. The ship itself is magnificent, all golds and dark wood, hiding behind a few smaller ships Emma must've failed to look behind. There are a variety of men on there, all dressed in pirate-esque clothing doing various things around the back of the ship. But the thing that takes her breath away most is the pirate captain. He gives her a little wave, jumping down to stand on the deck of the ship. He is in full-out pirate gear (which Emma should have expected having watched his videos), large chains hanging from his neck, and wearing a bright red vest that is barely done-up for this London winter weather and a dark black coat. His eyes, even from this far away, seem to pierce into Emma with the vastness of the ocean, shining out with glee.

Emma doesn't realize until Mr. Smee is upon her that she hasn't moved since being called. Her camera is turned back on her face, and she sees the reflection of her dumbfounded look on the screen. She shakes her head out, letting the small man push her from behind towards the ship, angling her camera towards where they are going.

"Oh yes, the Captain said we'd be having a visitor today. He said we'd be joined by a lucky Swan. You must be the one!" Mr. Smee continues his rambling as he pushes Emma up onto the ship.

It takes Emma a moment to stand still on the ship, the swaying something she isn't used to. She moves her camera, sweeping it over the ship around her until it is faced upon Captain Killian Jones, who is currently looking like a god leaning against the helm.

"Welcome aboard, milady," he says, giving her a nod. He then lifts his left arm, the hook on the end shining in the sunlight as he waves it in a large arc. "And what do you think of my humble ship?"

"I…" Emma has no words, no idea what to say. This was no how she thought she'd be introduced to this guy. She thought, for one, that he would be himself and not the pirate persona for their first meeting. But oh, was she mistaken.

"Oh, where are my manners. I am a gentleman after all," he says, moving down from the top deck and coming to stand next to Emma. He gives Mr. Smee a sharp look, and the man scurries away to join a few other crew members doing various things behind where Emma stands.

Instead of speaking again, though, Killian moves to grab Emma's free hand, lifting it to his lips and leaving a slow kiss on her glove. He doesn't drop her hand down but instead shifts his eyes so he is looking back at Emma. "Captain Jones, my lady. A pleasure to have you on my ship."

Emma opens and closes her mouth, but after a moment finally gets her momentum back and grabs her hand out of Killian's grasp. "Emma," she says, realizing that her camera has been following Killian's movement since he began walking down the ship. "And, pleasure to be… on your ship?"

Killian lets out a small laugh, smiling and taking a step back. "Now, what would the lady like to do first? We can swab the deck, or go to the galley for some food, or even check out the Captain's quarters…" The last suggestion is punctuated by Killian's eyebrow quirking up and his tongue moving into the side of his cheek.

Emma rolls her eyes, finally gaining her bearings back. A flirtatious guy? That she can deal with. "Well, I was thinking we could, you know, sit down and actually talk about what videos we plan on filming? Maybe get some of them over with quick so I can get back to the hotel. See, I didn't have that great of a flight so I'd love to-"

"Mr. Smee!" Killian calls out, interrupting Emma's ramblings. The small man comes up from behind her, rejoining them and saluting his captain. "See to it that the ship is ready to set sail. I believe the lady deserves a trip around the marina."

"What, wait what?" Emma says, looking between the two men as they both begin to walk off in other directions. She chases after the Captain, who is continuing to yell out orders to different men. Something about untying things and letting out sails and getting the ship sea worthy and – no! Emma did not sign up for a kidnapping today.

She grabs Killian by the coat, turning him around and forcing him to face her. "What do you think is happening here, buddy? We did not agree on any trips around the marina and I did not agree to be kidnapped by some goddamn pirate!"

"Oh, love, you aren't being kidnapped and-"

"-I'm not your love-"

"I don't think you have anything to worry about while aboard my-"

"Nothing to worry about? Oh, you'd better-"

"CAPTAIN!"

Their quarreling is interrupted by a man on the deck of the ship, Emma jumping back from Killian when she realizes just how close they got together in their arguments. She can still feel his body heat as they both turn to the man on the deck only to find, well, Emma isn't sure what she is seeing but it looks like some elaborately staged pirate battle.

How she missed the clatter of swords or the men boarding their ship, she doesn't know, but suddenly that is all she hears. She turns her camera to capture some of the madness, but then lets out a squeal as she feels someone pick her up from behind.

"Looks like you've found yourself a Swan, Captain Jones."

"Blackbeard, of course it is you," Killian says, drawing his sword and causing Emma to panic.

And she panics so hard that she uses her elbow to stab this so-called Blackbeard in the gut, which gives her enough leeway to send her foot backwards and hit his most vulnerable spot. Instantly Emma is dropped, her camera thankfully still hanging from the wristlet on her arm (that thing costs a fortune) as she lands on her feet.

Blackbeard scrambles to grab her back, Killian moves to pull her towards him, and Emma gets fed up and lets out a loud and long scream, a few choice expletives joining her outburst.

Everyone freezes on the ship around her, even the men battling below, turning to face Emma. She zeroes in on Captain Jones, ignoring everyone else and stalks over to him.

"WHAT. IS. GOING. ON." She punctuates each word with a large step, Killian backing up behind her into the mast.

At least Killian has the balls to look a little ashamed. But then, all at one, that mask appears and he stands up tall again. "Just giving you a pirate's welcome, love. I thought you'd be up for some adventure, or that your viewers would enjoy some too."

"A pirate's welcome? By KIDNAPPING me on your ship, and then having someone else try to kidnap me? Seriously Jones, how is that a proper welcome?"

"I… uh…"

"And on that note, what were you going to do once you 'saved me' from Blackbeard? Sweep me away and we could live forever in our pirate glory?"

Killian shrugs, tapping his lips. "Well, I thought I'd be able to get some form of gratitude out of saving you…"

"You're an ass," Emma says, stalking down the ship next to Blackbeard and all the other men. "I never should have come here, this was the dumbest decision I've ever made."

She reaches where thankfully the ship is still attached to the docks, and makes quick work of getting back onto dry land. "You're an ass, I don't know why I did this, my friends were right."

"Wait, Emma, wait," Killian calls, his voice softer than the harsh pirate one he used before.

"What?" Emma says, turning around to face the ship one last time. Killian is standing on the edge of the ship, looking out to her with sad puppy dog eyes.

"I… honestly didn't think you'd take it this harsh. It was all in good fun. I'm sorry."

Emma shakes her head. "Sorry isn't good enough. Goodbye." With that, Emma heads back to where she can catch a cab to her hotel, not turning back even when Killian continues to call after her.

Yup. This trip was absolutely, 100%, not worth it.

She doesn't realize until she gets back to the hotel that she had filmed the entire encounter.