I have a person I want to protect and cherish in this cruel world.
I got someone special, a person I would gladly throw away all my life for. A person who makes me whole, even though I'm far from being that.
In a room full of people, I can only see that one person, wait, that wasn't quite true… I can 'see' the other people, but they don't matter to me, since the person I love is there, and I keep all my senses on that person. The other people's voices and faces fades, and become blurry and unimportant, they're like ghosts, their voices are barely whispers around me. The only face, voice and body I have any intrest in is the one person I cherish, the sweet and kind, Christa.
She would always have my fullest attention. Every breath she took, every word she said and every move she made, I was there to hear and watch it all. And I could never have enough, I wanted more, I wanted to hear and see and feel more of her. Devour everything she gave me.
She was like the sunlight in my life, that string of good around me, and I would do everything in my power to keep that good in my life. Of course she wasn't perfect, I've seen her flaws, but those too were part of her, and I love every part of her, the good and the bad.
I have never told her how I really feel about her. Maybe it's because I know what a bad person I am, I'm selfish and harsh, if I did claim her as my own I would never be able to let her go again, and she might despise me for that. I don't want her to hate me...
Yes, I kept my distance, if I came too close she might push me away, if she knew the things I've done she could hate me. And I didn't want to risk that. Though I would never stopped thinking about how it would be to have her in my arms, feel her under my fingertips, and my lips. I imagined her to be warm, just like the warmth she gives me just by being in my presence.
Maybe one day I would be able to tell her how I truly felt, no more hiding and lying. And maybe, just maybe, she would accept me for who I really am, even though I am a bad person.
…
I know this is terribly short, I just got an sudden urge to write this! Hope someone could enjoy it though to some level. Gah, is this story confusing? I tried to write down some of Ymir thoughts/feelings about Christa I guess? I dunno if this makes any sense for anyone except myself ;w; Geh, I tried anyway!
-Miranda
