Dumplings
Written for ideasofmany. Happy Solstice!
Disclaimers: According to the parallel universe theory, Gabrielle exists somewhere and in one of those universes she is in love with me. In order to protect myself from defamation when I finally build that machine that will transport her here (or me to her, depending on what her world is like), I would like to point out that this is fanfiction based upon the show Xena: Warrior Princess and has no connection to the real Gabrielle.
"You know, you never did pay up for losing that race."
"Hades, I was hoping you had forgotten."
"No, no, remembering things is one of my many skills."
"Up there with embroidery, right Xena?"
"Embroidery is a very useful skill, Gabrielle."
"Come on, when have you ever used it?"
"You know that flying parchment I used to kill Gareth."
"Yeah."
"Embroidery."
"Xena, that makes no sense. You can't just make something fly with embroidery. Well, not in the conventional sense⦠but I guess you never have been conventional. Yeah, yeah, I know. 'Many skills.'"
"You know what's not one of my many skills? Cooking."
"You're not going to forget about this, are you?"
"Nup. You owe me dumplings."
"With the red stuff?"
"With the red stuff."
"Fine."
"Gabrielle, what are you doing?"
"Paying my debt."
"What about the du-"
"By the Gods, Xena."
"Gabrielle."
"Xena."
"GABRIELLE!"
"XEEEEEENAAAAAAA!"
"You're getting good at this."
"I should certainly hope so, with all the practice I have been getting."
"I meant distracting me."
"So did I."
"Give it up, Gabrielle. It isn't going to work."
"What isn't going to work?"
"You're not going to make me forget about the dumplings you owe me?"
"Owe you? But I just gave them to you."
"Nice try, Gabrielle."
"I am serious. Dumplings. Red stuff. That is what you meant, right?"
"What?"
"Oh, Gods. You didn't mean real dumplings did you? Xena, those take forever to make. No, no, that look isn't going to work on me. Go try it on Ares."
"But his dumplings aren't as nice as yours."
"Glad to know you appreciate my culinary skills."
"Those weren't the dumplings I was talking about."
"And what dumplings were you talking about, Xena?"
"You know what."
"The only dumplings I know are the ones I cook."
"These, Gabrielle."
"Aha!"
"What?"
"So these are dumplings, right?"
"Not falling for it, Gabrielle."
"Ah, but you already have. You said that these were dumplings, and what did you have in your mouth earlier?"
"As I recall, you had mine in your mouth as well."
"Who said I couldn't have some dumplings too?"
"You didn't win the race."
"So you don't want me to have any of your dumplings."
"You know what, on second thoughts, I guess I could share. Hungry?"
"Always."
