Moments

Title: Moments

Author: Qwyneth

Rating: PG (a light one at that)

Distribution: Email me to ask and I'll give you my blessing

Disclaimer and thanks at the end.

A/N: Okay, I know this is not the best choice of subject—not exactly original. But I've been thinking…what exactly do we know about Lily? Just about nothing. We know she was Head Girl (intelligent), great at Charms (magically talented), Muggle-born, of the surname Evans, had green eyes and long red hair…and we can read between the lines to gather that she was curious, kind, loving, pleasant, and not too disturbed about some good-intentioned rule breaking (practicing magic at home—if the law existed—and marrying one of the most well-known troublemakers). We also can conclude that there's something special about her, something to do with green eyes and Voldemort. But you know what exactly all that tells us about her personality, history, and character, from a writing point of view? Diddly. There's nothing to base a fic character on—and I have to admit that I've read far too many fics where she remains her 1-dimensional self as a main character. So this is an attempt—albeit poor—to give Lily (and James to an extent) some depth and some humanity. I'm writing in the frame of an event that has been fairly clearly defined in order to blend Rowling's Lily and my Lily better—so please don't shoot (or flame!) me for rehashing a very well-known night. And now, on with the show! Read, enjoy, and review please!

Moments

Lily pushed back the heavy drapes yet again and stared at her reflection transparent against the darkness.

"Lily, he's not there. Come back and sit with me, you're making yourself sick with worry." A chill ran through her body as her husband spoke, and Lily gripped her elbows, hugging herself in an instinctive effort to calm her jittery nerves. "Lily," the deep voice behind repeated.

"James, I—" Turning, Lily looked at her husband lounging across the room. "I just can't relax. I just….I just can't shake this feeling. I can't describe it. It's….it's…." Lily paused as she returned to the dark window. "It's as though there's something menacing surrounding me, enclosing me. And the longer I wait, the longer I just sit here and do nothing, my chances for escape are being shut off, one by one." As she spoke, she felt her husband draw up behind her, and, turning around, buried her face in his shoulder. For a brief moment her fear abated, as she reveled in the familiar, homey feeling of being in her husbands arms. But another chill racked her body, and she whimpered, crying out even as James' arms tightened around her, "Oh James, I'm just so scared!"

"I know sweetheart, I know. But there's nothing we can do about it. We have to just—"

"No! No, I mean, why? Why us, James?" Pulling away enough to see his face, she continued. "Why do we have to hide out like criminals, in fear of our lives? When is it going to end? What did we do to deserve this, this half-life? I want to raise our son—our children—like decent, normal human beings! I want to see my friends—our friends—I want to go to market and have people over and work again! I want a life, James! I want to be doing something to help the cause, something to stop Voldemort! But instead we're locked away here, for God knows how long, away from everyone but blasted Peter—and he's in hiding too! When and where is this going to end? I just want a normal life." Lily's demands faded into cries as tears overwhelmed her.

James sunk his face into her hair and stroked her back. "I don't know," he murmured quietly, over and over again.

After a few minutes, as Lily's sobs abetted, she pulled her face up and gently smiled into his. James smiled back. "I just don't know what's going to happen, sweetheart. But we won't be here forever—something's got to break eventually. Voldemort will tire of hunting us, and we can slowly return to our lives, and the cause. Or someone will finally hunt him down, or something! But until then—until then, we just have to be strong. We don't have any other choice, Lily. We have to be strong, for ourselves and for Harry. This will end. It will." As he spoke, James gently caressed his wife's cheek, then pulled her close and kissed her.

Suddenly the darkness enclosing the house began to glow in a strange, ethereal way, a hideous green pulsing sharper with each heartbeat. A piercing cackling laughter engulfed the house, it's pitch rising in intensity, permeating right to the hearts of the couple and surrounding them, attacking from every direction. Lily and James pulled apart, arms still clutching the other terrified, and a scream began to form in Lily's throat when suddenly—it stopped. Silence descended as startling as it had disappeared. One heartbeat, two…

"It's him. It must be. Oh God," James barely breathed. "Lily, take Harry and go!" he said, his voice getting stronger. "It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off—" Turning, face set in determination, he shoved his wife away from the window, punctuating his order. Lily tripped in shock, before stumbling out of the room as the door burst open and the laughter returned, less penetrating but still haunting.

Harry, get to Harry…Lily's breath caught and choked out of her in a sob as she heard her husbands shouts abruptly end and a heavy weight hit the ground, but her eyes caught on an old bassinet in the corner, and somehow she found herself next to it, bending over her fussing infant son. "Shh, my baby. Shhh….don't cry. Mummy's here." Tears slipped down her cheeks as she scooped up her son and cradled him protectively against her chest, but both tears and blood froze as a now-familiar cackle rose behind her. Her thoughts swarmed inside her before giving rise to screams. Not Harry! No, not my husband and my son, not Harry, not my baby, "Not Harry! Not Harry! Please—I'll do anything—"

"Stand aside. Stand aside, girl!"

"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"

"Stand aside, you silly girl…stand aside, now…."

"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead—not Harry! Please…have mercy…have mercy…." Lily's pleas faded and her thoughts finally cleared as she saw the green death flying towards her in slow motion, and she calmly turned her back, tightened her arms around her son, and knew no more.

Mere moments and one final spell later, dazed, green baby eyes blinked shut on a spidery trail of dark red blood as a silvery shadow, hazy in its near-immateriality, slithered out into the night.

Disclaimer: Okay, my name isn't doesn't begin with Joanne and it doesn't end in Rowling. If it did, I would not be wasting my time with this crapolla, I would be hard at work on my fifth book to try and keep my billions of fans from dying of anticipation. Yes, I am using her characters and, in this situation, her scenario, and I'm doing it without authorization. As I'm not attempting to gain profit from this, I don't think I'm liable. But just in case, I think this disclaimer has proven that the characters and scenarios belong to the illustrious JKR. HOWEVER, this story DOES in fact belong to me. Please respect that.

Thanks: Tremendous thanks and many bear hugs to Alicia/Sue Spinnet for convincing me to swallow my fears and post. (Go read her stories!! They're incomparable!!) As always, thanks to Rach, Jenn, and Shipper for all the love and shit (and never-finished or posted stories) they've provided and put up with over the years. You guys finally have me posting. I love yas.