I actually got to write this for school, which is completely awesome! So, yeah, I did Wholock. And it isn't crack . . . big surprise really. Anywho, I hope you like it! Sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes.
Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock, Doctor Who, or iPhones.
The Doctor grinned as Rose opened the door of the TARDIS. "I was thinking we should go to the future now," 10 suggested, clicking and pushing buttons on the control console of the spaceship.
Rose grinned back and threw a duffle bag on the ground. "Scotland in 3087!" She suggested enthusiastically.
The Doctor nodded and flicked a final switch. "Yes! Off we go!"
Then there was an almighty bang and smoke came out of various parts of the TARDIS. "No, no, no, no!" The Doctor shouted and pulled a switch down, fused two wires together, and slammed the heel of his Converse down on a button. Another bang threw them back and the Doctor laughed as they landed with a crash.
Rose smirked and ran to the TARDIS doors and flung them open, the Doctor right behind. Rose frowned at the all-too-familiar sight. "Doctor, we're still in London."
The Doctor frowned and pushed past his companion. "No, this isn't right. Sometime is wrong, very wrong. . . ."
The Doctor and Rose hurried across the street and Rose grabbed a newspaper from the ground. "2013!" she shouted and her eyes ran over the headline. "Sherlock Holmes Does It Again? But Sherlock Holmes is a fictional character!"
The Doctor grinned and jumped, wrapping Rose in a hug. "Oh, yes, yes, yes! We're in a parallel world, Rose!" Then he sobered. "But we're not supposed to travel between parallel worlds. No one is supposed to do that. Not since the Time Lords."
"We should go back," Rose said.
The Doctor smirked. "And miss this? Not for the world!"
Rose and The Doctor turned and headed down the street. "What are we going to do first?"
The Doctor waved the newspaper Rose had picked up. "Let's go find this Sherlock Holmes. And, if I'm right and I usually am, his address is 221B Baker Street. Oh, I've always wanted to meet him!"
Rose shook her head at his child-like glee and the two of them hailed a cab to the aforementioned address. Fifteen minutes later, they were dropped off at the address, which was next to a place entitled Speedy's Sandwich Bar & Cafe. They knocked on the door with the address 221B written on it in gold script.
A small old woman wearing a purple dress opened the door. She smiled warmly. "What can I do for you two?"
The Doctor grinned and pulled out his psychic paper. "We're from Scotland Yard. Came to see Sherlock Holmes about a new case!"
The woman smiled and pointed to a flight of stairs. "Just up there, dears," she said kindly.
The Doctor and Rose grinned and ran up the stairs, but before they could even reach the door, a gunshot and a loud cry of "BORED!" resonated through the walls.
Another voice cried, "Sherlock! Watch where you point that thing! Just think what Mummy would say if she saw you now."
The first voice, presumably belonging the the great Sherlock Holmes, shouted-after several more gunshots-, "But I'm bored, Mycroft!"
"I just told you about a case!"
"Gahh! Boring! Lover did it!"
"But there is no mention of a lover!"
"But it's right there! Ordinary people are so oblivious!"
The argument continued as Rose turned to the man standing with a goofy grin on his face next to her. "The great consulting detective is seriously like that?"
"Yep! Oh, I love this already! Allons-y, Rose!"
They stepped up to the door and the Doctor knocked on the door. A small blond man opened it an inch and said, "Terribly sorry about the noise. What are you here for?"
"Came to see Mr. Sherlock Holmes," the Doctor said.
"Oh, sorry," the man said apologetically. "Sherlock doesn't take well to fans so-" The door was ripped out of his hands by a tall skinny man wearing a tight black suit. His gaze flashed over them and they could almost see the gears in his brain clicking.
He pointed at the Doctor. "You're not from around here. And I don't mean England. You're not from this planet. . . ."
The man, who the Doctor had reasoned was John Watson, said, "Oh, really, Sherlock? You're suddenly into the solar system? And you come right out of the bag with conspiracy theories?"
Sherlock shook his head. "No, John, you still don't observe! Look at his hands, the hands of a traveler. And his eyes. They are so old-too old for any mortal man. Seen too much tragedy. Too much pain. But he continues because he is looking for something . . . no, someone who can give him a reason to live. He's . . . lonely. Your family is gone, isn't it? No! Your species! Your planet! Oh, this is getting good! And you're clever! Almost as clever as me! I can see it in you. You have the body of a forty-year-old man, but the brain of someone much, much older."
The Doctor grinned. "Brilliant! Amazing! Just what I expected! Oh, I'm the Doctor, by the way. You're right about all that. I'm a Time Lord. Some call me the lonely god. What can you say about Rose?" he said enthusiastically.
Sherlock looked quite flattered about the Doctor's exuberance. "Well, she wants adventure. Finds it with you, shocked by the horrors of the world, but loves every second. She cares about you a lot-no, loves you. Hmm, you didn't know that. Emotions make so many people blind, even aliens."
John, who looked beyond shocked, tugged on Sherlock's sleeve. "Uhh, you've been standing there for like ten minutes." Sherlock looked at him blankly. "Might want to let them in."
Sherlock nodded and stood back while the elated Doctor and Rose stepped in and glanced around. The small living room was crammed with a mess of papers and books and half-finished experiments. A blond man in a posh suit turned as they stepped in and did a double-take.
"The Doctor, the bloody Doctor!" he said in a shocked voice.
The Doctor and Rose stared at him. "Oh? Do you know me?" the Time Lord asked.
"Well, I should say so! Mycroft Holmes, head of Torchwood," he introduced himself.
"No. There's a Torchwood in this parallel universe too? Seriously, though, you're related to Sherlock Holmes?"
Mycroft shrugged. "Much to his dismay."
Suddenly, Sherlock's phone beeped as he received a text. He pulled his phone out of his suit jacket pocket and glanced at it. "Really? Of all times?" he said, exasperated.
"Who is it?" John asked, worried.
"Moriarty."
"What does he want?"
"'Come and play my game, Sherly. I heard you were bored. Solve this in fifteen hours or the Queen dies.' Picture of a 1950s police box," Sherlock read off the message.
The Doctor and Rose shared a glance. "Can I see that picture?" Sherlock handed over the phone. Sure enough, the TARDIS was the 1950s police box. "How did he get a picture of my TARDIS?"
"What is that?" John asked.
"Time and Relative Dimensions in Space," everyone chorused.
"Time machine. Anyway, what does Moriarty want you to do?" the Doctor muttered.
Sherlock shrugged. "Could be to solve a murder, or maybe it has to do with you."
"Do you mind?" The Doctor asked, motioning to the phone. Sherlock shrugged. He texted: What do you want us to do? Why do you have a picture of my TARDIS? -The Doctor.
A couple seconds later the phone beeped as a text appeared. The TARDIS? Is that what it is called? Time and Relative Dimensions in Space. . . . Clever, Doctor. But your TARDIS doesn't have anything to do with this. I just put it there for fun. What do I really want you to do? Entertain me. If you fail, . . . well, poof goes the Queen. -JM
Rose eyed the perturbed look on his face. "What does he want?"
"Entertainment. Don't know how that's going to work. Weeellll, I could take him around in the TARDIS. But he could cause the end of the universe. Weeelllll, this parallel world's universe and some of our universe, but not our earth. We could go find some aliens. Oh! How about a tour of Torchwood! That would be fun! Show him some alien jiggery-pokery."
"Jiggery-pokery?" Mycroft asked.
"Scientific term," Rose said.
"Why don't we just take him to the time of his death?" Sherlock suggested.
"Nah, makes things too wibbly-wobbly. Why don't we just go visit him?"
"No one knows where he lives," Mycroft said.
"Have you tried asking him?" The Doctor turned back to the iPhone. Why don't you, me, Sherlock, John, Rose, and Mycroft all meet up for tea? -The Doctor
The phone beeped a moment later. Leave John, Rose, and Mycroft. They're ordinary. I just want to see the angels with the phone box. Meet me at 458 Fallen Street. You have half an hour. You wouldn't want an accident to happen to a few helpless people, would you? -JM
The Doctor read the message out loud. John, Rose, and Mycroft protested on being left behind.
Sherlock rolled his eyes at their antics. "It's not like we're going to die from this! Actually, there is no guarantee on that." He shrugged. "At any rate, you can't come."
"Doctor-," Rose started, but the Doctor shook head.
"I'm sorry, Rose. You can't go on this one."
Sherlock shrugged on a trench coat and his blue scarf, and, after the Doctor said good-bye to a forlorn Rose, they were off. They ran outside and hailed a cab. The cab stopped and they climbed in as Sherlock yelled the address. They reached the address in ten minutes. They got out and climbed up the steps to the flat where Moriarty had directed them.
The Doctor reached up to knock on the door, but the door swung open to reveal a short, black-haired man, who could only be Moriarty. He grinned eerily. "Oh, you're just in time, Sherly!" He waved a remote in the air. "I was just about to blow up Chelsea Hospital."
The Doctor looked aghast. "There are twenty thousand people in that hospital at any given time!"
Moriarty stepped back and let them in. He shrugged. "What do I care? They're boring idiots! They're USELESS!"
The Doctor glared. "No one is useless, not even you."
"Oh, look! The alien is Mr. Humanity! Boring! I expected more from you! My patience is wearing!" he said in a sing-song voice as he led them through a hallway littered with weapons and things neither Sherlock nor the Doctor wanted to think about to a dark little kitchen with half-finished gruesome experiments lying everywhere just like Sherlock's kitchen.
Sherlock sighed. "Both of you are boring. In fact, I'm getting more bored by the second. I'll leave if you don't do something entertaining."
The Doctor turned his glare to the consulting detective. "You can't just leave! He'll kill the Queen!"
Sherlock shrugged. "My brother is basically the British government. It won't really matter."
"Oh, but you wouldn't want me to kill, say, John, would you?" Moriarty asked slinking around Sherlock to stand on his left. The blood drained out of Sherlock's face and the criminal at his side laughed maniacally. "So there is something that gets to you. . . . Disappointing. And you, Doctor. You would do anything to save the ones you love, but you have failed so many times. . . . Your loneliness and humanity are your weaknesses."
The Doctor shook his head, his expression changing to the coldest, most angry and pained look of determination that could be imagined. He had changed into a brick of calm, cold, calculating anger. "No. It makes me stronger," he said and the two other men finally saw the raw power that flowed underneath the last Time Lord's usually serene facade.
Moriarty and Sherlock stared in awe before Moriarty finally said, "Masterful! Completely ingenious! I've never met anyone like you! Oh, your intellect. Your power. Oh, what I'd give to study your brain. Are there more of you?"
"No, I'm the last and you will never understand what you are dealing with until I kill you."
Moriarty could tell that this threat was a promise and he should back off before he truly was killed. But this was interesting. Oh, how long it had been since something like this had come up. Then he got an idea.
The consulting criminal sidled up the Doctor and plucked his sonic screwdriver out of his pocket. Before the Doctor could snatch it back, the short man backed away and examined it. He pressed a button and a pitcher of a smokey gray liquid cracked and spilled out over the kitchen table. "Ohhhh, sonic. I have only met three people with something sonic. I know! Make me a sonic . . ." He glanced around and picked up a handgun from the counter behind him. "Sonic handgun."
The Doctor shook his head. "I can't do that!"
Moriarty shrugged. "Well, I guess your little companion gets a pretty little bullet to the brain."
The Doctor sighed and collected his thoughts. "Okay, but we have to get to my TARDIS. I can't make it from anywhere but there."
Moriarty nodded and the three men left the house. They ran down the street and turned corners until they reached the TARDIS. Sherlock frowned at it. "Bigger on the inside?" he asked.
The Doctor nodded and pushed the doors open. They walked in and Moriarty shut the door behind them. The Doctor turned to Moriarty and held out his hands. The other man handed the handgun and sonic screwdriver to him.
"Right," the Doctor said, turning back more-or-less to his normal self. "I'll need your help. First, I need to use enhanced superconductivity and Grat radiation from planet Rondulsen on this handgun. Second, you" -he pointed at Moriarty- "need to push that blue button and then pull that lever when I tell you to. Third, Sherlock, watch that screen and if it turns mauve, tell me to get out of there."
"Don't you mean red?" Sherlock asked.
"No, humans are the only ones who say code red, universally, code mauve means danger. Alright! Ready?" The Doctor threw off his trench coat and suit jacket. He turned to a door that they hadn't noticed before, handgun held tightly in his fist. Moriarty moved to the controls in the middle of the TARDIS, and Sherlock turned to the screen next to where Moriarty stood.
"Ready!" both men said in unison and the Doctor opened the door and entered the room beyond.
He shut the door and a muffled cry of "Now!" sounded. Moriarty pushed the button and pulled the lever as he had been instructed and an almighty bang resounded through the control room of the TARDIS.
Sherlock kept a careful watch on the screen. Several minutes passed without incident before the Doctor shouted, "Turn them off!"
Moriarty pushed the button and pushed the lever up. Then the Doctor emerged from the room, slamming the door behind him. Despite having beads of sweat rolling off his face and his shirt soaked with more sweat, he didn't look the worse for wear from the radiation. In his right hand, he held the newly-soniced handgun.
Then he grinned and pulled on his suit jacket and trench coat. "Alright, let's go," he said.
Moriarty glared at him. "You haven't given me my sonic handgun yet," he complained.
The Doctor shrugged and headed toward the TARDIS doors. "I'm not giving you anything sonic while we're still in my TARDIS."
Moriarty realized that the Doctor would not budge on this decision and followed the other man out of the TARDIS. Sherlock followed closely behind. Once outside, the Doctor held out the gun. "Can we go without you killing a multitude of people now?"
The consulting detective reached out and grabbed the other half of the gun. "I won't kill anyone today if it means I get this," he promised.
The Doctor nodded and released the gun. He and Sherlock watched the other man disappear around a corner. Then Sherlock nodded swiftly and hailed a cab. He told the cabbie to take them back to the flat and he settled back in the cab.
When they reached 221B Baker Street about half an hour later, they were greeted by Rose flinging open the door and wrapping the Doctor in a hug. She quickly released him, her nose wrinkling. "Are you okay? You smell really bad though."
"Ah, that would be the radiation."
"Holy crap! Radiation?!" Mycroft exclaimed. "Are you insane?"
The Doctor shrugged. "Weeellll, it's debatable. . . . Anyway, I'm immune to that kind of radiation. Love being a Time Lord."
"Why were you playing around with radiation?" John asked.
"He made Moriarty a sonic handgun," Sherlock said in a bored tone.
Rose looked alarmed. "You made him a sonic handgun?! Of all things, you had to make a handgun sonic?!"
"Calm down, it can't do anything. Weellll, beyond opening car doors and breaking wires. It will only last for a month anyway. You have to use Hjukda 77 radiation to make it permanent. I used Grat radiation."
Rose shook her head. "Well, at least it isn't permanent then." Then a thought occurred to her. "You said at the beginning that there was something very wrong and that is why we landed in a parallel world. What was very wrong?"
"Oh, turns out the TARDIS' Henywa circuit was blown. Anyway, I think it is time for us to go."
Rose nodded and they said their good-byes to John, Sherlock, and Mycroft. Then they headed back to the TARDIS, where the Doctor fixed the blown circuit, and they were off to another exhilarating adventure.
Hopefully not horrible. Also, this is my first time writing the 10th Doctor so please don't kill me for any OOC-ness. Please review!
