A/N - ok this one is a little strange, maybe an example of what happens when a fanfic writer is putting off completing a story she loves and her mind wanders... I got to thinking what would happen if my favorite Bioware boyfriends, Alistair, Anders and Kaidan, sat down to talk? Then StoneburstHeart called it the Bioware Boyfriends Support Group, and the following story was born~
All characters - with the exception of one OC - in this story are the property of Bioware, and I thank them dearly for creating them to begin with and for allowing me to play with them - nicely - in this fic. This fic contains spoilers for Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age II, and the Mass Effect trilogy. I don't think you need to have played all five games to understand it, but it would certainly help. It should be clear from the story but just in case - the setting is post Dark Ritual/Archdemon slain DAO, Anders saved/romanced, sided with the mages DAII, and post-destroy Kaidan romanced ME3...
Kaidan accessed his omni-tool once again and checked the navpoint. Yeah, this appears to be the right place, he thought to himself as he opened the door with the sign "BBSG" printed in simple black block letters on white background. When he entered the room, he saw chairs arranged in a small circle in the center and a table on the far side, along the windows, that appeared to hold refreshments. Seated in one of the chairs was the only other occupant of the room at the moment and Kaidan paused to study the other man surreptitiously under the premise of getting coffee. He saw that the man was young, younger than Kaidan, and he had a warm friendly face, light colored hair and was sporting a neatly cropped beard. Most startling to Kaidan, the man was dressed in gleaming gold armor which appeared to be made of real metal and looked like something out of the history books. Kaidan grabbed his coffee and took a seat opposite the man.
"Oh, hello there, I guess you're the new guy?" The man spoke in cheerful tones. "I'm Alistair. Er, King Alistair, my wife hates when I forget to mention that part." The last part of the man's statement trailed off on a mumble.
A king? Kaidan thought, amused. This guy didn't seem very… regal… gold armor or not, but rather, one of the kind of people you'd enjoy kicking back and sharing a beer with. "I'm Major Kaidan Alenko," he introduced himself formally, since Alistair had shared his title first. "Nice to meet you." He reached out and shook the other man's hand warmly. He wasn't sure why his wife had told him to come here tonight, but he had humored her, since she was the Savior of the Galaxy – and eight months pregnant. He found it extremely difficult to say no to her these days.
Alistair returned Kaidan's handshake and smiled warmly. "And you as well, Major," he replied to Kaidan's greeting. "Welcome to our little group. We're just waiting on one other member tonight, since the other guys are busy. He should be along…" He broke off as the door opened again and a new man entered. "Ah, there he is… Anders, come meet the new guy!"
Kaidan watched the new man – Anders – enter cautiously, and seat himself in one of the open chairs, taking what appeared to be great care to leave space between both Kaidan and Alistair. Anders wore a brooding expression and seemed pained to be there. He was decked out almost as strangely as Alistair, Kaidan reflected, in a long tunic with what looked like feathers on each shoulder. Feathers? Kaidan mentally shook his head. He didn't think even his pregnant wife would get him in feathers – not that he planned to give her any ideas.
"Major Kaidan Alenko," he introduced himself, when it looked like the other man wasn't going to take the initiative. Anders appeared to shake himself out his reverie and notice that Kaidan had spoke for the first time, he replied, "I'm Anders. Where is the moderator? I really need to get back to my wife."
Alistair chuckled, not allowing the other man's moody and distracted manner to diminish his cheer. "She should be along shortly, Anders, have some patience. The baby isn't going to come tonight, you have months to go." Alistair shook his head and spoke to Kaidan, in an aside, "It's his first, you know."
Since Kaidan knew well how it felt to be a first time father-to-be, he nodded in response and forgave Anders his bad mood. "My wife is having our first, too," he told Anders in a gesture of friendship.
"Oh ho," Alistair exclaimed gleefully, "So I guess that makes me the voice of experience then?" He rubbed his hands in apparent glee at the prospect.
"I'm not sure having one child a week old makes you an expert, Alistair," Anders threw back at the other man, "although I'm sure your wife was absolutely thrilled to have you leave her alone with an infant tonight."
Alistair grimaced, the words apparently hit a nerve, Kaidan saw. "Well, she wasn't thrilled, exactly, you're right, but she knows how important this is." Alistair nodded to emphasize his words, apparently trying to convince himself as well as his audience.
Any reply Anders or Kaidan may have made was curtailed by the sound of the door opening once again. In walked a woman with white hair rolled into a bun and eyeglasses perched on the end of her nose. She was slim and rather short and dressed in a simple gray skirt and black blouse. She carried what looked like an old-fashioned notepad and pen in her hands, Kaidan noticed. She nodded to each of the group, smiling, and took a seat at the head of the circle of chairs, opposite the three men.
"Major Alenko," she said in a warm quiet voice, "I'm Doctor Charlotte Taylor, I moderate this group. Thank you for joining us."
Kaidan acknowledged her greeting with a nod and a, "Ma'am." He wasn't sure of Dr. Taylor's rank in the scheme of things, but the woman commanded respect quietly and as far as he was concerned he would address her as such. He waited patiently for Dr. Taylor to begin, once she had greeted the other men.
"Now, gentlemen, I believe we were discussing pivotal battles last week, shall we begin there?" she inquired of the room at large.
Pivotal battles? Kaidan repeated in his head. What exactly is this about? His thoughts were interrupted as Alistair started speaking, "Yes, I was telling you about the final battle with the Archdemon."
Kaidan wasn't sure what an Archdemon was but from the way that Alistair had pronounced the word, it didn't sound good. He hated to interrupt, but his curiosity got the better of him and he asked, "What's an Archdemon?"
Alistair turned to him, startled, and replied, in a distracted tone, "Huge dragon-like thing, leader of the Darkspawn, indication of a Blight. We had to kill it so that Ferelden could be safe."
Kaidan wasn't sure he was any better informed than before he had asked, but he nodded and decided to let it ride for now.
"Yes, Alistair," Dr. Taylor said in her calm tones, "and by 'we' you meant?" She was obviously asking a question to which she already knew the answer, a trick that Kaidan sometimes employed himself. He wondered if Alistair would see it coming.
"I meant my wife and I. We had to kill the Archdemon." Alistair replied succinctly. "Well, she wasn't my wife then, but you get the point." He was muttering again.
"Yes," Dr. Taylor replied, patient, "And how did that make you feel Alistair?"
"How did it make me feel?" Alistair was spluttering now, his voice pitched with anger. "I was scared and worried and then I saw her plunge that sword through the thing's head and I was more relieved than I ever have been before. How did you think I felt?" He flung the last with a scoff.
Dr. Taylor nodded sagely, completely unperturbed by the man's outburst. "Good," she said quietly, "I think we're getting somewhere. What about you, Anders?" She turned her gaze to the man in question.
"I wasn't there for the Archdemon," Anders sallied back, deliberately obtuse.
Dr. Taylor didn't rise to the challenge, instead, she probed further, "No, I mean, your pivotal battle and how did it make you feel?"
"Well, first I blew up a Chantry full of innocent people," Anders said, "then I had to convince the woman I loved that it had been a necessary thing." Kaidan winced in sympathy at imagining how that conversation had gone. " Then I stood by her while she fought to defend me and the rest of the mages against every Templar in the city. I'd say my feelings are irrelevant."
"Not to me," Dr. Taylor replied calmly. "Your feelings are part of the reason I'm here. And I'm sorry to hear the guilt and sorrow in your voice, even years later. Perhaps one day, you will come to see that past regrets have no place in the future you are building with your wife."
Anders studied her, startled and seemed to retreat inside himself. "I can only hope that day will come, Doctor," he replied quietly.
Dr. Taylor nodded, satisfied for now and turned her gaze to Kaidan. Shit, Kaidan thought, so engrossed in the other men's stories he hadn't thought ahead that he would be placed on the spot next. He met the doctors eyes and tried not to cringe. "And you, Major Alenko?" she inquired.
"Kaidan," he corrected, thinking it was silly to stand on formality when everyone else was clearly on first-name basis.
She nodded, and repeated, "Kaidan, how did you feel during your pivotal battle?"
Kaidan took a deep breath and began to recount those moments that were burned into his brain but that he shied away from consciously remembering when possible. "Well, we were pinned down by heavy Reaper forces with little to no backup…" He broke off as he saw the doctor raise a hand and shake her head.
"No, Kaidan," Dr. Taylor told him quietly, "I don't want your report. How did you feel?" She placed special emphasis on the last word.
Kaidan took a moment to think about her question, then he remembered the most overwhelming emotion he had felt that day. "Helpless. I was lying there, in the medbay, cause she had called for an evac before the last run. She wanted to protect me. So I was lying there, and heard the Normandy's engines spin up to jump to FTL, and I knew I couldn't help her, couldn't do anything. And I felt helpless."
He saw nods of sympathy from the other men. From their accounts, they had at least been able to be with their women at the end. Double edged sword as it was, they had been able to help.
Dr. Taylor nodded, then smiled at him warmly, "Welcome to the support group, Kaidan, I think that's a good start."
Kaidan decided two things. First, that it was good that Shepard hadn't mentioned the term 'support group' while coaxing him out the door tonight. Second, that she still knew him better than any other person in the galaxy. He walked out that night with a smile, reminding himself to find pistachio ice cream on the way home. He wasn't explaining why he had come home empty-handed to an eight-months-pregnant Commander Shepard.
