I would like to take some time out to thank all of you that are reading my first chapter. I really do appreciate it.

All rights go to whoever they need to go to ^.^

Alright enjoy.

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Thanks again!

Sorry for any spelling or grammar errors.

Chapter 1: Please Don't Bite My Head Off.

I glared at the judge. His beady eyes glared right back.

"Guilty." The judge announced. He slammed his gavel down to make his point. Fat, smelly idiot.

"You will serve your time at St. Bartholomew's School for Juveniles," the judge read on, "where there will be..er..others like you. Case dismissed."

The judge wielded and banged his gavel.

I think he just liked the sound of his gavel.

Whatever.

I got up from the wooden table at which I had been placed for the trial. My lawyer's eyes were downcast. Disgust and guilt was written all over his face. I nodded in his direction. He waved. Poor guy, all he wanted to do was help me, but I still ended up in juvy.

A guard stepped forward and offered a set of handcuffs to me. I took them willingly.

"I guess two months for shoplifting is a pretty short sentence. Right?" the guard said hopefully.

Wrong.

"Sure." I mumbled.

"Joe, she's a regular." pointed out the fattest and ugliest guard.

He just needed to shut up and go get some Do-And-Go! Doughnuts. And take a bath.

Even liposuction couldn't help Mr. Flabby.

I was humming a song about flab and Mr. Flabby when the oddest thing happened. And not odd as in a two headed snake but as in whoa-what-the-heck-just-happened.

The lights flickered in the hallway and went out. A chill slowly settled itself among us. I shivered under my thin coat.

"What the-" chocked out one officer, "What is-"

In the corner slithered a serpent as thick as my body.

"Code 190! Code 190!" shouted the officers.

This was clearly exciting the snake. It hissed and moved closer.

"Shut up you twits!" I yelled.

"Get down!" yelled someone as they shot at the serpent.

I heard a bloodcurdling scream.

Looks like Joe was lunchmeat.

"Oh my gosh! Look at the size of that thing!"

"Holy crap!"

"That could kill someone"

I was too scared to look up.

"5149. Slowly in 5…4…3…2…1…LEAVE!" shrieked the head officer.

In 5 seconds flat, I was alone. In the dark. With a serpent that probably wanted me for desert. Yeah, today was a goody-goody-gum-drops-peachy-keen day. Not.

"Good Mr. Snakey," I soothed, "you don't want to eat me. I taste bad! Yes I do! I taste bad!

I sounded like an idiot.

I backed away slowly and felt around for the exit. My Vans fell back onto something wet and somewhat slimy. Blood. I almost threw up.

Poor Jim, I thought, he was so…so…

Well I didn't know if he was good or bad. Heck I didn't even know what he looked like.

The dark was not a big helper either. Somehow it dulled my senses.

I knew I was no match for the huge snake and goodness knows how long it stretched. My best chance was to run.

And that's exactly what I did.

I ran towards the flashing light at the end of the hall. The snake followed right at my heels. At least once or twice I felt the serpent's tongue on my back. I turned a corner and kept running. I wouldn't last much longer. My lungs felt like theory were on fire. Tears threatened my blind eyes.

I tried to open a few doors in the hall, but each time I was let down. Each time the end of the hall got nearer and nearer. Each time my breaths got shallower and shallower.

I was going to die.

I reached the end of the hall and slumped against the wall. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a hand drop a hulking mass to the floor. It was shaped like…like…a sword! I panted over and picked it up. I returned back to my fetal position and rocked back and forth as I waited for the serpent to come. Sure enough it came slithering around the corner. My heart had miniature spasms.

The serpent slithered up to me and tasted me with its tongue. Well actually smelled but that's beside the point. It rolled me over. I was clutching the sword waiting for the perfect opportunity. The snake wrapped its tongue around the handle and flung it across the room.

"No!" I cried as I tumbled after it. The snake flicked out its lightning fast tongue and tool ahold of my ankle. I roared in frustration and kicked for my freedom.

The snake slowly raised me to look in its endless eyes. I was frozen with fear. I wanted to pee myself.

I hastily scanned the room, but it was nearly impossible considering I was upside down. From my window of view I could see a dust light fixture, a chandelier, hanging within my view, my grasp. The thing was nearly falling apart. Just one little jerk and it would come apart. I had to think quickly. The snake started to slowly slither away from my lifesaver. This couldn't happen. I was giving up so easily, but with all the blood rushing to my head, it was hard to think. Suddenly I had an idea. A shark's weakness was its eyes right? If I could just claw the snake's eyes, I would be free. Hopefully.

I raised my hand slowly and placed it between the snake's eyes. Maybe rubbing it would calm it down.

"Good Snakey," I cooed, "so big and strong. So smart and slithery."

Slithery. I know. It was stupid but desperate times call for desperate measures and new vocabulary.

I patted and rubbed the snake's head some more, slowly inching towards its eyes and I went. I reached out slowly and clawed its eye. The snake screeched in pain as it threw me to the ground. I landed on my arm and heard a crunch. I winced in pain as I looked at my broken arm. My bone was sticking through. Now was my window of opportunity. I army crawled to the sword. I could hear the snake slamming itself against random objects.

Sword in hand, I stoop up, still cradling my arm against my chest. The snake sensed a change in the air and slowly slithered toward me. It opened its mouth as I let it wrap its tongue around me and pull me towards its mouth. When the roof of its mouth was within reach I held out the sword.

"Not this time!" I yelled as I speared sword in the snake's mouth. It disintegrated into dust and I was left along, right arm throbbing, in the dank courtroom halls.