Blaze with the fire that is never extinguished. ----Luisa Sigea


This takes place immediately after the last scene in Smile...

The ride back to headquarters was silent. Usually they discussed what transpired, unless one of them was upset, and this time, Goren had shut down entirely. It's too late...

She really thought that he had destroyed any aspirations she had toward the captaincy or beyond, just by being her partner. He had no idea how to respond to that, or what to think about it. All he knew was that he hurt, and although it was a familiar pain, he was really getting tired of it. Somewhere along the way over the past year, his entire life had derailed and he had no idea how to clean up the train wreck it had become. He'd thought he and Eames were doing better. Obviously, he was wrong.

When they got back to headquarters, Eames turned toward him as if to say something, but he got out of the car before she could say a word and headed for the elevator. He heard her call his name, but he ignored her. Screw his manners...he just wanted to get done with what he had to do and go home. He didn't want to talk. Not right now.

He was already at his desk, plowing through paperwork when she got to her desk. "Bobby?"

He didn't answer right away, or even acknowledge the fact that he'd heard her. When she called his name a second time, he swallowed hard and, fighting to keep his expression neutral, looked up. "What is it, Eames?"

He was impressed at how even his voice sounded. She studied him and leaned over her desk toward him. "You have to understand..."

He waved a hand. "I do understand. Forget it. I really don't want to discuss it."

"But..."

"I said...forget it."

He turned back to his work, determined to get it done as quickly as he could so he could get the hell out of there. The last thing he wanted was for the entire squad to be witness to another blow up between him and his partner. Ignoring her, he finished the forms, signed what he had to and shoved the ones needing her signature onto her desk.

She looked up from her own paperwork "Are you going to book Leslie?"

"No," he answered shortly. "I'm done for the day."

"So you expect me...?"

He finally met her eyes. "No," he interrupted, which was uncharacteristically rude for him. "I don't expect anything from you anymore, Eames."

That time he had been unable to hide his pain, and he knew he had to get out of there. He grabbed his binder and headed for the elevators. Sensing she would follow him, he changed course in mid-stride and slammed open the stairwell door. He wasn't wrong. He heard her call to him as he rounded the ninth floor landing. He moved faster.

He got to his car, started it and backed out of the spot. Slamming the transmission into drive, he headed out of the garage, glancing once in the rearview mirror as Eames ran out of the stairwell. He wasn't surprised when his phone rang, and he ignored it. He also made up his mind not to go home, and he headed his car uptown from his apartment. There was only one person he knew who could help him, and he silently prayed she wouldn't turn him away.

Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming around
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes
Turnaround, bright eyes, every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround, bright eyes, every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit restless and I dream of something wild
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit helpless and I'm lying like a child in your arms
Turnaround, every now and then I gt a little bit angry and I know I've got to get out and cry
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit terrified but then I see the look in your eyes

Turnaround, bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround, bright eyes, every now and then I fall apart

She stepped out of the shower and toweled off before heading into her bedroom. Just as she pulled the oversized sweatshirt over her head, the door buzzer sounded. She frowned. She wasn't expecting anyone. All she wanted was to spend a nice quiet evening at home, undisturbed by the chief or anyone else. Was that too much to ask?

Pulling the door open, she was very surprised to see the man who stood there, leaning against the wall beside the door. He gave her a sad smile. "I'll leave if you want me to," he said quietly. "But...I...I really need you."

She studied him for a long moment, seeing the pain he made no attempt to hide. She wasn't quite sure she'd heard him right. "Excuse me?"

He groaned softly, wondering if he'd made a mistake showing up on her doorstep, unannounced. No...it was a mistake showing up at all. "I'm sorry. I...I should have at least called. Never mind..."

He pushed away from the wall and began to head down the hall toward the elevators. "Bobby," she called softly.

He stopped, hesitated, then turned toward her, a silent question on his face. She could still see the raw emotion in his eyes. He was no longer hiding from her. "Say it again," she encouraged gently.

"I'm not playing games," he muttered, struggling to keep the emotion from his voice. "I-I need you...but..." He shrugged, defeated. "It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does matter. You haven't needed me for a long time."

He looked at her in silence. "That's not true," he protested.

"Yes. It is." She watched him shift uncomfortably. "Something happened."

"Just...one more thing in a long line of events that have been unraveling my life, that's all. Good night, Denise."

The sight of his broad back as he walked away troubled her. "Don't."

He stopped, half turning toward her. "Don't? Don't what?"

"Don't take one step forward, then a giant leap backwards, Bobby." She motioned to him. "Come on, baby. Let's talk."

He watched her turn and head back into her apartment. He only hesitated a moment before following her.

And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever
And if you'll only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever
And we'll only be making it right
Cause we'll never be wrong together
We can take it to the end of the line
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks
I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight

Once upon a time I was falling in love
But now I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life
But now there's only love in the dark
Nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart

She sat up in the dark. Beside her, he stirred, but he didn't waken. Reaching out, she lightly ran her fingers through his hair. In his sleep, he sought her, wrapping his arm around her waist and pressing his forehead into her side as she sat there. She stroked his head and gently rubbed his back. He sighed softly and his muscles relaxed under her fingers. If he'd been on the edge of another nightmare, it had slipped away without grabbing hold.

Turnaround, bright eyes
Turnaround, bright eyes
Turnaround, every now and then I know you'll never be the boy you always wanted to be
Turnaround, every now and then I know you'll always be the only boy who wanted me the way that I am
Turnaround, every now and then I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wondrous as you
Turnaround, every now and then I know there's nothing any better and there's nothing I wouldn't do
Turnaround, bright eyes, every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround, bright eyes, every now and then I fall apart

She wondered if the man who had come to her that night was the reality or the illusion. His pain had been raw; his remorse seemed genuine. But in the light of day, would everything change? He had never been one to use her, but over the past year, he had transformed into a man she no longer knew. Could it be that he was rediscovering the man who'd gone away, the one she had fallen in love with years ago? Did she even dare to get her hopes up? She wasn't sure she could handle any more disappointment at his hands. If this was real, if he was truly back, then there was a chance for them. If not...She closed her eyes and swallowed a soft sob. If not, then this was the end. She would never do this again.

And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever
And if you'll only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever
And we'll only be making it right
Cause we'll never be wrong together
We can take it to the end of the line
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks
I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Once upon a time I was falling in love
But now I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life
But now there's only love in the dark
Nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart


A/N: Total Eclipse of the Heart is by Bonnie Tyler.