I'm not fine at all
"…I remember the day you told me you were leaving I remember the make-up running down your face and the dreams you left behind you didn't need them like every single wish we ever made I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you and the memories I never can escape cause I'm not fine at all…"
You know how they say that time is the cure for everything...well I think that that is the most huge lie that the mankind could ever come up with...and I'm the live proof of that...because here I am, five years later and I'm still not fine at all.
You must be asking yourself "what in heaven's name are you talking about?"...I'll explain that but let's begin with the presentations, shall we? My name is Jadelyn Eden West, 26 years old, a famous director, wealthy, have a big house and a different woman in my bed every night; But the most important fact about me is that I'm suffering from a broken heart for five years now and nothing I do can seem to cure it, not even time itself.
The reason to my heart disease goes by the name of Victoria Marie Vega. A beautiful latina with the most gorgeous chocolate eyes, lustful brown hair and a smile that could light up the whole world.
So... now that you folks know that let's tell you all the reason behind this little outflow. You see I've always been in love with that annoying latina and for some time she was in love with me too, which was really good, but somehow she fell out of love for me or bullshit like that. I still don't know the real reason behind her departure. She told me gave that whole "is not you is me" talk and I had to swallow that up and watch her walk away from me. Sad, right?
At the time a gave myself a entire month to grief then slowly a went back to my life working my ass out to make myself whole again, to try and be the person I was before she walked away. It took some time but I finally made it. Of course I wasn't one hundred percent back to my normal self but I was a good ninety percent, and that compared to what I was when she went away, was really good. But I knew that I would never be the same again.
Yea, though I was "okay" it still hurt like hell. I was, and still am, haunted by memories of us, and by her voice and the sweet nothings she would say to me as we made love. I got to the point I thought I was losing my mind. And that's when I started sleep around looking for something to numb the pain, to at least make it more bearable and for a few months that worked...yeah it worked until I found out that she was engaged. Finding out that she was getting married wasn't even the worst part...what hurt the most is see that other is now giving her what I wanted to give her.
Well, now you know why I'm drinking myself to numbness. Today is the great day. She's probably saying "I do" to that redhead girl, giving her everything that was supposed to be mine. And what's left of me? Well...nothing that is worth. Yeah I'm still wealthy and famous and I still be writing and directing movies but that's pretty much it. I'm just a empty shell waiting to be taken by the sea.
I'm really not fine at all.
And I don't think I'll ever be fine again without her.
Waking with amnesia would be a really good solution for my case, but I'm not that lucky. So I will keep hurting because time doesn't cure it at all.
The End?
A/N: Hi guys. Is been a while since I wrote a Jori fic so I hope you guys like it. I was think of maybe do another chapter, maybe give then another chance to be happy together? What you guys think? Let me know.
