Disclaimers: Naoko Takeuchi owns Sailor Moon and all of the
characters in it. ::follows the rest of the disclaimers code in a
monotonous fashion with her right hand in the air:: xx
Okay.
Things to know before I write this... This is a poem I wrote the other
day and I was going to mix it with a story featuring Haruka and
Michiru. So I can take credit for the poem. ;; Not Haruka or Michiru,
but the poem. This is the first time I combine poetry with story
segments, so give me a chance before you insult or sue me, will you?
(This is first person in Michirus POV)
Hope is Regret
[You say its over
But its really only just begun.
Are you not my lover?
Is it my heart you want to shun?]
I collect the last trace of rosin on the tip of my bow and put the
amber glue away in its case before positioning my instrument on my
shoulder. Whenever I play its simply from my conscience only and not my
mind. Whenever I play this precious string tool allows me to blanket
myself from reality and visit that tranquil place that is my
imagination, my own world.
Solemnly playing a silent melody, I
cant even focus on more than that beautiful face of yours. On that
smile that you show only to me. But you tread with that wind so quickly
that I cant even catch up. You keep me asking why, asking when I will
be able to see you smile more.
[You give me a great excuse,
But you know me better than that.
I shadow my hurt in recluse
And defy loves handicapped acrobat.]
Why do you pretend to feel nothing for me after all of those flashbacks
that youve dreamt of? Im not going to push you entirely away, dont you
know that? You are the eternity of my past and present life. Is your
denial stronger than mine or weaker? I cant even tell anymore. You are
so distant and clever. Too distant and far more clever than you can
imagine.
[You say it can not work.
Can not or will not?
Am I the worlds biggest jerk?
Whats this new lesson Ive just now bought?]
Im dipping my tune into a gentle chord just as my mind syncronizes with
the deepest question of all: Are you going to run away from this? Ive
tried my best to remind you of your duty. Ive tried my best to offer my
heart. Do you really want to run away without me?
[I wont give up on you.
My heart beats quieter than the flaps of a dove,
Should I be denied whats eternally true?
Open your eyes, Im still in love.]
If my eyes are closed or open right now, I cant even say. All I can see
right now are my worries along with this unknown song playing on its
own is my heart. I know I cant control it and neither could the past
Neptune that cradled her beloved Uranus. Its one thing to try to
dedicate my life to my mission, but its an entirely different thing to
lie to my feelings. How long will you run without me?
[Another month watching the rain,
Another attempt to dial your number.
Isnt there another way to block out this pain?
As I age Im only getting younger.]
You always mastered your motive for speed. You are so fast now that I
cant even tell when you overlap me. Its all a dream, but even in a
dream you are the wind. Maybe thats why I cant read you that clearly
just yet.
A sigh escapes my lips without me even realizing. How
can I touch you without feeling air? When you smile, is that just my
mind playing tricks on me? Or are you the culprit?
My conscience
has decided to end the solo symphony of notes. I set my violin back in
its case, fully strapped and then stare at my thoughts.
[You have my heart though,
Im not going to take it back.
Like the disguised foliage of a crow
This love will be thick, thick and beautifully black.]
Youll never accept your destiny. Youll always run away from it
because you have your own quarrels with the wind. I cant interfere
until you are ready. I respect you too much to interrupt that. I love
you too much to ruin that.
Knock knock. The door? I cover myself with a thin jacket and walk to the front of my apartment.
[But no. Yet still, you do not know.
My life, for ever vowed to spend.
No courage left to even run low,
Please. Once again, be my forever friend.]
Even while doing seemingly simple things, I find them difficult because of the complications you bring to me.
Finally I can see whos come to address me at my entrance outside. It
is you, clad in dripping clothes. How long have you been in the rain,
my love? How long have you been pointlessly running with your own
words? When did you finally realize that Ive been here this whole time?
"Michiru.. I need to talk to you." Haruka has nothing but desperation in her eyes as she informs me. And fear too?
I pull her inside and take her jacket off, replacing it with a blanket on instinct.
I trace her face once with the back of my hand and ask, "Whats on your mind?"
"Look.. I know I cant outrun my purpose in life. And I know that it
would destroy you too if I decided to turn away. I was only offered
once to take this mission and trust me, the offer never left my mind."
Haruka spoke to me with direct eye contact, she didnt want me to ignore
her. And she knew that I wouldnt as I let her finish, "Theres
definitely so much for me and you and this whole world if I
join..again." That brought a smirk to her face and a smile to mine.
"Haruka, are you sure you want to pull through with this?" I had to ask. This was a big decision to make still.
Her smirk turned into a smile, "After the ground I covered to make my
decision? Of course I want to, Michiru. Ill protect you, you deserve
it."
Hai Haruka. We both deserve it. This will be one long and
challenging lifetime but as long as you can answer my questions, Ill
protect you too. Lets not let the same tragedy happen to us this time
around either.
"So. What do you say to a cup of hot tea,
Haruka-san?" I wanted to lift the heart talk. This was too soon for her
probably, but I had forever to wait.
Haruka gave me the most delicious look of appreciation and replied happily,"Hai."
End
Authors Notes: Okay. I want feed back this time. This is my first time
experimenting with this concept and I need to know if I pulled it off
correctly or not. Or if any of you think its a good job or a bad job.
So input people! Please??
Im very sorry that it wasnt that
romantic if you were looking for that but I was trying to write about
what was going on in Michirus mind when she was trying to get Haruka
to join her as a senshi after they got sent to earth again.
Alright.. Enough notes, right? Last thing then. Original poem written
in the brackets is titled, "Please". R & R ! Ill appreciate it, I
promise! ::walks away with a spatula:: Time to cook!
