-1Useless knowledge

Disclaimer: Captain Tsubasa belongs to Yoichi Takahashi. I own nothing and I'm not earning any money with it.

Rating: +15

Warnings: humor, silly, Luis Napoleon

Summary: there is knowledge that Pierre could life without.

Paring: None

A.N.: Pucchikyo_girl's fault XD. Her reviews always make me want to write something with spoilt, bratty Pierre.


Useless Knowledge

There were things that Elle-Sid Pierre could go without knowing. Thank you very much.

One of this things was the knowledge that his parents still had sex.

Like every child for him, his parents were asexual and the thought of them exchanging body fluids was …blurgh.

He knew that at some point in their lives, his parents must have had sex or he would not exist, but this point, as logic as it was, was completely ignored.

The other thing he could go without knowing ,was the existence of Luis Napoleon.

Luis Napoleon. Alone the name was enough to give him a headache. One of the worst kind. The kind that just throbbed behind our temples and wandered over to your eyes, that hammered at your brain like compressed air hammer at the same time, all the while a brass band marched through your head and an elephant herd was performing 'Lord of the Dance' on your brain. This kind of head-ache.

He knew that Luis Napoleon existed. He knew that he was a rebel, that cost trouble to get attention. And that was enough. For him.

Too bad Luis Napoleon thought different about that.

It wasn't like he didn't try to avoid HIM , but bad luck would have it that he was always paired up with HIM during training camps. He always had to share a room with HIM, just because no one lese wanted to ( as if he), but he was the Captain, so it was his duty ( as the others put it).

So he happened to always share a room with Luis Napoleon and to get him to know better than he wanted.

It wasn't like Luis Napoleon snored or hugged the whole blanket or the bed to himself. No, if that would have been the problems, they could be solved.

Why he hated to share rooms with Luis Napoleon was because of Luis' bad habits. Bad habits that were going on his nerves.

For you see, Luis loved to run around naked ( NAKED! In his birth-costume, without clothes) in his rooms.

At first he had thought that Luis did just that to get attention, but after a surprise visit, in which Luis had opened him his door naked, he knew that Luis always did it.

He had tried NOT to look, for really, he had seen Luis naked in the showers already, but it was hard.

At his first encounter with this bad habit, he had gotten bet-red, like a tomato, his face had glowed as hot like he had eaten to much of the hottest pepperoni serve with some pepper.

So, red-faced, he had stuttered out „ can't you put something on?", and had turned his head away.

„What? Jealous because I have more?", Luis had asked , cocky grin on his lips, legs slightly spread and hands on his hips.

„No, I don't „ , he had said head high in the air, because really, he stood above such pity competitions and after all, he was Elle-Sid Pierre, so naturally he had the largest ( later he had measured his Little Prince. Just to make sure. To his great dismay, Luis was one millimeter larger, but he was one millimeter bigger, so that would equally each other out).

The other bad habit had quit shocked him.

He had never given a second thought to it, because it was so normal or him, but nor for Luis.

When they had unpacked their clothes, he had asked Luis were his under-war was.

„Under-wear? What's that?", Luis had said with a straight face.

And at first he had laughed about it, thinking it a joke, but when Luis hadn't laughed with him, he had cast laughing and his chin had hit the floor ( it still hurt).

He had been too shocked to say anything, but from that point on, he had tried to talk Luis into wearing under-wear. Up until now, Luis wasn't wearing any. And as it seemed, he wouldn't any time in the near future.

So, yes, that was all knowledge he could go without. Knowledge he didn't need to know. Knowledge that wouldn't be missed in his life, but apparently someone thought differently about that and he would love to have a nice, little talk with that person.

But this talk would have to wait, because a training camp for the France national football team was about to start and he just could eel his head-ache beginning to start, afraid of all the useless knowledge that was waiting for him.

-THE END-