I used to have this childish irrational fear of the dark. It stuck around my whole life but sometimes it was less noticeable. It was very obvious when I was a little girl, but as I got older it hid itself away. Sure, sometimes it came around as I was trying to sleep, with the usual thoughts of murderers and kidnappers lurking in the shaddows, just waiting for me to fall asleep. Then I'd fall asleep and wake up the next morning, alive and in one piece.

But strangely as it is, when the apocalypse started, the fear didn't appear. I wasn't alone at night. I had my daughter in my arms and my husband be my side. Besides, I had other fears clogging up my brain, the ravenous dead people, and the abusive husband sleeping beside me.

When Ed died, the fear still wasn't there. I still had my baby. But when my Sophia died, the fear came flooding back to me, and it brought a few friends. I was scared that my Sophia was killed in the dark. That must be the worst way to die. I didn't know if I believed in heaven or not, but I hoped it wasn't just darkness. Especially if I were to be killed in the dark. I didn't want my last view to be of the dark just to see more dark. And I didn't want that for my daughter.

But then I found light. The fear slowly drifted away as I wasn't alone anymore. Every night in the prison the darkness didn't get to me because of Daryl's arms wrapped me as we slept together. Every night as we were drifting off to sleep he'd kiss my forehead and whisper "I love you". But he always thought I was asleep, though I heard it everytime and couldn't sleep without it. That brought on the fear that he would never say it to my face with the knowledge of my knowledge. But either way, Daryl is Daryl, and he has his ways and I loved every single one. Daryl gave me light. He saved me from the dark and I'm not afraid anymore.

But I know now, death isn't darkness. I know that as I walk into our cell and sit down by my teary-eyed Daryl. He was slowly sipping a beer to hide his pain. His tears always make me sad, but I couldn't cry now, it's almost against the rules. I can't make his tears stop. I can't touch him. He can't touch me. I know I'll miss the feel of his hand. But all I can do is smile at my lonely Daryl.

Heaven isn't darkness. Heaven is choosing the place that makes you happy and staying there as long as you wish. You get to choose for your eternity. Death is life, just you have no fear of death. By now, I can't be the only one who choose an eternity in the apocalypse.

I'm happy here, by Daryl's side. His hands have been covered in my blood for three days now. He climbed into the bed and hugged my old pillow and cried. I sat on the bed next to him and just watched him. It's all I can do.

In between sobs he mumbled "I loved you"

And I said "I love you too", even though I know he can't hear me.

My death was during the sunset. And I'm not in eternal darkness.

He saved me from the dark and I'm not afraid anymore.