"Those who hate most fervently must have once loved deeply; those who want to deny the world must have once embraced what they now set on fire." - Kurt Tucholsky
Lily Evans was, by nature, prideful. She knew when she was right, and she definitely knew when she was wrong, but Merlin help the person who called her out on it. Lily was also, by nature, the best friend anyone could wish for. She was the kind of friend who you could always trust to guard a secret. She could tell what you were thinking just by the look on your face. Lily Evans was, by nature, a lover. She always sought to ease the fears and be a comfort to the broken hearted. She could tell when you were hurting. She always knew how to fix people. She knew how to fix everyone but herself.
It was easier for her to focus on how much she hated him. She hated the way his hair stuck up in the back, even before he rumpled it. She hated the way his eyes lit up gold and hazel when he was pleased with something. She hated the way that he always knew exactly what to say to ruffle her feathers. She hated the way that he always looked at her when an expression that was half heavy lust and half rage. She hated the way he moved with a casual elegance that she could only dream of having. She hated the way girls looked at him when he walked through the halls, and the way there were always whispers in the girls' lavatories about his regular broom-closet escapades. She hated the way her body warmed at his slightest touch when he breathed an insult into her ear, and she hated all the unbidden memories his scent and closeness arose in her. She hated the fact that she knew how to hurt him with her words. She hated the fact that she wanted to hurt him for all the ways he had hurt her. She wanted him to suffer the way she had suffered. She wanted to show him just how much hatred he deserved. She hated him for deserving it. She hated him for hating her. She hated how easy it was for her.
But most of all, she hated the fact that she didn't hate James at all.
James Potter was, in fact, much like Lily Evans in many ways. He was prideful and strong-willed, much like her. He hated knowing that he was wrong, and he hardly ever admitted it, even to his best friends and brothers Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew. James was the best friend any of these boys could wish for, and he was also their unofficial leader. He was the one who had decided to stick with Remus after the boys had discovered his "furry little problem." He was the reason why Remus Lupin still had his sanity. James was the steady one of the group. While the other boys had their emotional and personal ups and downs – Sirius with his ever-constant parade of girls, Remus with his lycanthropy and prefect duties, and Peter with his general feelings of insecurity – James was the one who knew how to handle his emotions and feelings. He was the one the other boys would come to, on the rare occasion that they needed to talk to someone. He was the one that knew when they were down, and would help lift their spirits with witty banter and a joke. He was the balanced one, the calm one, and the strong one.
Except when it came to a certain red haired witch.
