Bad Luck
Really. Really, God. Why me? What do you have against me? Why am I so unlucky that something like this is happening to me? I am floating in a huge bubble, so high that if it popped, I'd fall to my death. Where did this bubble come from? Nowhere, of course! Oh well. When you're unlucky, you can't just become lucky. You gotta make the most out of it. If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
"Cave Johnson here. Now, I used to say, if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Well, no more. If life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back. I don't want your **** lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Burn life's house down! With the lemons! My scientists will make combustible lemons! Make life rue the day it gave Cave Johnson lemons!"
The voice of my superior bounced in my head. Yeah, I'll make life take those lemons back⦠I'll make life swallow them.
