Am I worthy?

I always go back to that question. I'm Ladybug, but I'm not ladybug at the same time. Ladybug is just a facade to help people. If Paris Knew who was under the mask, they would be disappointed.

I'm fat, Chloe has said it enough times that her words ring in my ears, boring a hole in my self appreciation.

People never notice me. They notice ladybug, but not me. Alya will run off and chase Ladybug, but if she knew that was me, would she still do that? Heck, even Adrien doesn't notice me.

I'm an awful person. I'm always hurting people, like when I took Max's place for the video game tournament.

I'm worthless. I don't have any talent. There is just nothing good about me. The only thing I can do is hurt those I love, even though I know i'm a disappointment to them.

I'm replaceable. This one stings the most. Lila has the entire class wrapped around her finger. Everyone loves lila and hates me. Lila would fill the void, no, space, left by my leaving.

So I take one last look at that question. Am I worthy? No. Not by a long shot.

Should I stay? This questions harder. Mom and dad would have each other and while they would hurt at first, they would recover. Alya and Nino would replace me with Lila, as well as the rest of the class. Chat noir. He's a different story. He would miss Ladybug. But I would miss him. I… have mixed feelings about him. I know he would eventually move on, but I don't ever want to see him hurting. He's my chaton and I don't like his pain, but I know it's for the best. I don't deserve to be here. I don't deserve life.

With that final thought, I step closer to the edge of the roof. I stare into the dark alley below me and I take my final step forwa-

"Stop!" I here a silver baton scrape the pavement below. "Don't jump princess. You can't. I can't lose you too."

"Oh Chaton, it will be better for everyone." I say as a wry smile graces my face.

"Mari, please don't do this."

Hearing my name is like a bucket if cold water was dumped on me. "I'm not worth your effort. I just screw everything up." He just stares at me with his electric green eyes as I pore my insecurities and self hatred on him, minus, of course, my self identity issues.

"But Mari, you're beautiful, inside and out. You're brave and kind and just indescribable with how amazing you are. I...I think I love you."

"But what about Ladybug?"

"I… honestly don't know. I just want to kiss you so bad and hold you so tight and tell you everything will be alright, but it won't. Because you're about to jump and if you do then i'll never be able to do those things."

"I… Chat-"

"Could you not jump? If not for yourself, then for me?"

"But why Chat?"

"Because… because you're worthy. You are worth my effort to come and stop you. You are worth so much more than I can possibly say or give. You are worth more than you think. You are worthy and you shouldn't give up on life, Please don't give up."

"I'm worthy?"

"Marinette, you are more than worthy."

I take a step back. And then another. And then another. And when he comes to give me a hug, i'm not ashamed to say I didn't let go for a very long time.

"Thank you, Chat noir. Thank you."