Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or any of its characters. Don't sue me, 'k?

Author's Note: The title of this stor is actually "Love is Hell, War Is Something More Like Purgatory: Duo's Guide To Finding The Perfect Woman." Unfortunately, the title was too long to be entered in fanfiction.net so I shortened it. This is Duo's first self-help book. As in, he's the author and it's from his point of view. And girls, please don't be mad at me! I'm not beating up on girls or anything. I just wrote about love from the eyes of a normal everyday man. So, enjoy!

INTRODUCTION

Have you ever thought about life? Not like that! I mean, REALLY think about it. Putting your mind in high gear so long that your brain feels like so much goo shifting in a jelly-like mass inside your head. I've been doing that lately.
I know that some of you skeptics out there are wondering, 'Duo? Thinking? What is this world coming to?'. Well, I guess the world must be going to the dogs, 'cause Shinigami's using his brain.
So, anyway, I was thinking and I came to the most logical conclusion I've ever come to in my entire life. Here it is: "Love is Hell. War is something more like Purgatory."
You heard me right. Love is Hell. Any halfway decent looking guy knows that. The girls, the screaming, the phone calls, and the Valentine's day schmuck are enough to drive a man to celebacy. All the women out there listening to this-willingly or unwillingly-are probably rolling their eyes and asking their man to take them out to dinner, just to prove that men don't think this way. You're fooling yourselves, ladies. 'Cause you may not know it, but deep down inside, no matter how meek and obedient your men seem, they all think the same thing. There's no avoiding it.
Now, granted not all you men out there have first-hand experience of war to compare with. Take it from one who knows, war is NOTHING compared to the trials of everday life with a woman.