HI! I have no idea where this came from. My only excuse is that being drugged up on painkillers and antivirals will make you imagine any pairing possible. I'd apologise but I like this idea a lot now, even though it makes so little sense. I will apologise for how out of character most of them are in this, but I really did like how this turned out, and to me it worked best with the characters mentioned. I should possibly explain Sasori's behaviour? well, the way I see it is normally there's this one person in a group of friends who never says anything, you think they have no emotion whatsoever, but give them one sip of alcohol and they're everyone's best mate, and slagging it up. Sasori is that guy. I hope Suigetsu comes across as the loveable bastard he is in this. Yeah.
Just gonna explain this is also written from the point of view of British student life, as that's what I know. I'll explain a few of the British things here too, as I'm not sure every reader will get them. Basically, fresher's week is the first week of university, it's mainly for first year students (or freshers) and fresher's fair is a day when you can go sign up to clubs and societies or sports teams and the like. Asda is the UK's equivalent of Walmart. In fact, it is owned by Walmart. Smart price is their ridiculously cheap nasty bargain range. Although they do make nice jaffa cakes. Oasis are a UK indie band that I hate with a passion, as all their songs sound the same, and they are all bad. The title of this is a flight of the conchords song I had stuck in my head today. It seemed fitting.
Lastly, a quick not to those reading "finding tobi" I do have more chapters written, but like I mentioned before, I'm pretty sick (totally not fishing for compliments/sympathy) and can't really go on the computer for long periods without feeling like rubbish to copy them up. For some reason I felt compelled to copy up this monstrosity first. Hope you understand. I also hope people like this story!
Apologies for the mega long author's note. I'll try not to let it happen again.
Orange
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, any of its characters mentioned within this story, asda or asda smartprice. All I own right now are some max strength paracetamol and some tamiflu :)
The Prince of Parties
The punch tasted awful. It didn't help that it was the oddest shade of orange Deidara had ever seen, and honestly he wasn't sure if that was fruit or something more sinister floating in its depths. The blonde discarded the cup of it that he had been given and sought out a more satisfying drink. Knowing where the booze was kept, Deidara stole away a decent sized bottle of peppermint schnapps. He felt safe in the knowledge that the party was in full swing, and nobody would have noticed his actions.
He rolled his deep blue eyes when Kakuzu answered the door to a bunch of girls dressed like bunnies, and took a deep swig from the bottle. Why, was it every house party they went to, girls would show up dressed like this? Kakuzu noticed him drinking and raised an eyebrow.
"Hidan's gonna be pissed when he finds out you took that," he heard the tanned male's deep voice over the blaring music. Deidara merely shrugged in response and offered him the bottle. Kakuzu shook his head, and drank from his own bottle of cheap lager. He looked as about excited as Deidara felt being here. It was, however, Kakuzu's home that the party was being held in.
Normally, Deidara would have been the life and soul of the party. The blonde loved going out drinking and dancing. He just wasn't up to anything tonight. It was the end of fresher's week and all he'd wanted to do was have a quick drink at the SU. Hidan and Kisame had had different ideas though, announcing they'd be having a house party.
So now here he was at the house shared by Kisame, Itachi, Zetsu, Hidan and of course Kakuzu. The usual student staple of terrible indie music was thumping through the shared accommodation, and almost everyone was drunk or high. The blonde had been hoping his own housemate, and close friend, Sasori would have agreed with him and stayed away. Sasori however, had undergone a personality transplant, and was having one of his rare moments of sociability. Not wanting to remain in the flat alone, Deidara had followed him here.
Actually where was Sasori? He hadn't seen the little redhead since they'd arrived. Whenever they weren't in class the pair was usually inseparable. He wandered throughout the house in search of his friend stopping briefly at the living room. This had become the dance floor for the evening. He grimaced at the various couples with little to no shame on the two couches. The horrific bunny girls were dancing, badly he might add, with his friend Tobi who was absolutely wasted. He went through to the kitchen, hoping his own alcohol would kick in too.
On the countertop sat a friend from his life drawing class, her name was Konan, she was clearly smashed, stuttering and slurring and odd conversation with her boyfriend. He was heavily pierced and was in his final year, unlike Deidara and Konan who were second years.
Glancing outside he found his wayward housemate. It figured he'd be smoking with the cool kids. Ugh, Itachi was there. Deidara supposed Itachi would have had to be somewhere around, he did live here too. He'd just never really liked that guy that much. The black haired third year had his usual impassive look on his face, as he took small drags on the cigarette. Not wanting to spend any time in his company, Deidara went back indoors and decided to raid the fridge.
It proved to be a good idea; somebody had made a large bowl of vodka jelly. It was probably for when the party died down and just their close circle of friends was left. Too bad, for now the blonde claimed it as his own. He took a spoon from the drawer and went to find somewhere he could eat in relative peace. On his way to wherever it was he headed he ran into the evening's ringmaster. Hidan was always good for a laugh, and right now he was horrendously under the influence of something. His unusual violet eyes were red rimmed, a grin plastered across his face.
"Dei!" the boy cried, spreading his arms wide and pulling him into a hug. The blonde acted just quick enough to avoid spilling the jelly.
"Are you having a good fucking time?" Hidan bellowed. He never did have an indoor voice.
"Apart from this music," Deidara conceded, "how are you in the rock society and yet you play this oasis shit, un?"
"Seriously, blame the others. I wouldn't choose this crap," Hidan slurred. Deidara would have said more, but his silver haired friend pushed past him after his own statement, yelling at some unknown first year about nothing.
The blonde shrugged it off and seated himself on the staircase, spooning the strawberry jelly into his mouth happily. He was taken off guard when a pale hand suddenly darted into the bowl and took a large helping of the squishy treat. He looked up to see the owner of the hand slurping down the alcoholic jelly and licking his lips. It was a first year, he was sure of that much. He had shoulder length white hair and bright purple eyes. He gave Deidara a toothy grin, and helped himself to another handful of the dessert.
"God, I love jelly," the boy drawled, licking the sticky remains from his fingers suggestively. Deidara smirked back at him, sucking on his spoon. The boy was being incredibly forward for having only just met him.
"Of all the people here I didn't expect you to be the one on their own," the white haired boy elaborated, leaning on one of his hands and looking Deidara in the eye. The blonde began to feel a little awkward.
"I'm not on my own, this is my friend's house anyway," Deidara replied, going back to his schnapps.
"Ah, well that is a shame then." Was that a wink? The blonde was aware he had a slight feminine air about him, so was used to guys flirting with him. That usually stopped once they heard his voice though. What was with this kid?
"You are aware I'm a guy, un?" Deidara asked tentatively, leaning back against the wall.
"Oh, I'm aware," came the response. The boy leaned over him, speaking in breathy tones and pushing Deidara's blonde fringe away from his face gently. They stared each other out momentarily, before the white haired one grinned again, grabbing the spoon and helping himself to more jelly.
Deidara watched him as he sat against the other wall, shovelling the sweet food down happily. The boy's eyes were shut tight in joy. Was the other just messing with him? If he liked jelly that much he didn't really have to do the whole awkward flirting thing with him. Deidara had to admit though, the other boy was sort of cute. He was currently making contended noises as he ate.
"Who are you?" Deidara asked, smoothing his hair back into place. The white haired boy ceased what he was doing and looked at him.
"Oh right! My name's Suigetsu, you're Deidara right?" the boy beamed.
"Yeah, how'd you-"Deidara began
"Fresher's fair, I signed up for film club" Suigetsu interrupted. That made sense, Deidara was one of the representatives for the club at the fair. It also explained why the boy seemed familiar to him. Unsure of what to say to the boy now that their food was eaten Deidara took in some more of his drink. By now his vision was starting to grow fuzzy and his mood more cheery. The alcohol was setting in.
He launched into the default conversation of all students meeting for the first time and asked Suigetsu what course he was on.
"I'm studying performing arts. What about you?" the white haired one smiled.
"Fine art," Deidara put simply. "I love art," he smiled down at the evidence of this statement. His black jeans were covered with the remnants of oil paint and clay from things he'd worked on in the past. Someone pushed past them, probably on their way to the bathroom. It was only then that the pair realised they were blocking the hallway.
"So, handsome, shall we take this somewhere else?" Suigetsu asked with a twinkle in his eye.
"Hey, I thought I told you I was a guy, un" Deidara protested. He took the hand Suigetsu extended his way and stood up. Suigetsu turned to face him chuckling,
"Relax, I was joking. I didn't mean it like that," he smiled, adding mischievously, "unless you wanted me to of course,"
The pair ended up by the kitchen table staring into the bowl of mystery punch. Deidara's face paled at the sight of it. Getting drunk only served to make it less appealing to him. Suigetsu on the other hand was licking his lips.
"Damn I'm thirsty," he announced. It took him almost thirty seconds to say. He picked up the bowl and began to gulp down the liquid from the edge. He stopped almost instantly, purple eyes wide in horror. He spat out whatever of the beverage was in his mouth, right back into the bowl, and sat it back on the table.
"What the?" he squeaked,
"I warned you, un," Deidara told him, leaning on the boy so he didn't fall over. That vodka jelly had been pretty strong. "it's probably made from whatever Kakuzu found at the bargain bin in asda, un. I don't know if that's fruit or vomit in there either,"
"Probably both," hiccupped his new friend, before yelling for no reason, "smart price! Yeah!"
Several other partygoers looked at the pair nervously, before looking away again going back to their own activities. Deidara, as the intoxicated are wont to do, found his little display hilarious, and collapsed in a fit of giggles. The pair of them laughed for a good ten minutes without stopping, arms clutched to their sides, and around each other.
"So, so, sooooo" Suigetsu laughed, Deidara began to repeat his words.
"So, soooo," the blonde smirked. "what shall we do with the mystery punch?"
Suigetsu looked thoughtful, or he at least tried to. Within seconds he had it in his hands again, and marched through to the front door with it. Deidara followed him dutifully. Suigetsu was digging through a pile of discarded handbags, before pulling out an ugly tan and blue affair. He smirked evilly, and motioned for Deidara to hold it open. The blonde did as he was asked grinning, while the white haired one poured the contents of the punch bowl into the handbag. He zipped it bag up and gave it a satisfied jiggle, before hanging it proudly on one of the coat hooks.
"So, whose was that," Deidara asked, as the leant against the wall. Somewhere along their trip they'd acquired new bottles of something. He sipped at his while he waited for Suigetsu to answer.
"Ah, just this bitch named Karin I know. Because of her I almost missed registration this week."
"What's she look like?"
"You know the one with the stupidly styled red hair and glasses, got nasty hot pants on?"
"One of those bunny girls?"
"That's the one,"
"Man I hate those hookers, un,"
Suigetsu laughed heartily, "me too!"
They both drank some more, commenting on the terrible music, and how they hated everyone else at the party. Whenever someone else came across the pair they merely gave them a weird look, went silent and drank some more. All in all Deidara was actually enjoying himself that night. In his haze he suddenly had a revelation.
"Sui! Sui, un," he gesticulated with his bottle as he faced the younger boy, "we need to get rid of the evidence! Or she'll know we did it!" the blonde picked up the empty glass dish, and grabbed at Suigetsu's hand. He opened the door in a rush and pulled him through it, slamming it behind them.
"Yeah, Dei, you're right," Suigetsu replied far too slowly, as he was already outside. It didn't occur to him that Karin would know he did it whatever they did. Also most of the people at the party had seen them both undertake the action.
The white haired boy stood idly, not really capable of making his body do anything at that moment. The blonde however was spinning round and round energetically. It was raining outside, a soft sheen of water sparkled on the pavement.
Suddenly, the punch bowl was flung from Deidara's grasp as he spun. It was clearly an accident, and he was lucky the bowl didn't hit anything as it flew through the air before landing with a dull thud on a neighbour's lawn.
"Shit!" Deidara gasped happily, watching the glass as it soared through the air. Suigetsu cackled at the spectacle. Deidara slowly became aware that he was now soaked through, and his white t-shirt was now clinging to his chest. If he squinted he could make out the tattoo on his chest through the sopping wet cotton. He glanced at Suigetsu, who was now stood next to him, with an arm around Deidara's waist. He was wearing a pair of grey jeans, torn artfully in places, with a purple sleeveless top. He must be freezing in this autumnal rain.
"Aren't you cold un?" he ventured, wrapping his own arm around the smaller male. He was answered with a shrug.
"I never asked," began Deidara, "why are you here? Aren't you with anyone tonight?"
"Kisame's my cousin. I'm also on the fencing team, he invited all of us tonight," Suigetsu answered before adding smoothly, "any I'm here with you,"
The pair smiled at each other, eyes hazed over, cheeks flushed due to alcohol.
"Nice try, un," Deidara smirked cockily. He didn't move to get away this time though.
"Well, I may or may not have followed my housemate Sasuke with me, but I lost him as soon as I got here," Suigetsu gave up his act momentarily. The name struck a familiar chord in Deidara's mind, but he pushed the worry aside. The pair had their foreheads pressed together and were breathing heavily now. Deidara slowly became aware that Suigetsu was leaning closer towards him now. He closed his eyes gently and...
There was a loud banging inside the house, suddenly they could hear male voices yelling. The pulled apart before anything could happen and watched as the front door was thrown open, two black haired men spilling out. One of them was being held back by a ginger haired kid, the other by Kisame.
"Oh yeah," thought Deidara, "Sasuke is Itachi's brother. The one he always fights with,"
Suigetsu groaned. He hadn't realised Itachi lived here, although it seemed obvious now he thought about it. He'd also forgotten his friend was an angry drunk. He let go of Deidara's hand and wandered over to Sasuke.
"Suigetsu, we're going home," Sasuke announced haughtily, stalking off down the road. Suigetsu rolled his eyes, running a hand through his white hair. He wandered back to Deidara, quickly giving him a peck on the cheek.
"Nice meeting you Dei," he whispered seductively as he did so. The blonde watched speechless as his companion for the night jogged off down the road to catch up with the younger Uchiha. He ignored the sudden weight he felt on his shoulders
"Deidara! Where have you been all night? I've missed you," slurred a very familiar voice. He looked down to see Sasori hanging off him. Somewhere to his right Kakuzu was speaking, something about taking home, too much to drink.
"Never mind," the deep voice finished, "clearly you're the same way,"
There was a click as the front door closed, and the two artists began to make their way home. They were going the opposite way from Suigetsu and Sasuke. Deidara gave one last glance over his shoulder as he staggered back with his housemate. He could still make out the purple clad back in the distance. Deidara smiled contently to himself, he couldn't wait for the next film club meeting.
