To Kakashi, there were few things more pleasurable than being loved this way. Being worshiped like this, Iruka's sweet caresses and loving kisses.
After hardening his heart for so long and forcing himself not to love, and not allowing himself to be loved, he took such joy in the simple and relatively innocent things. Like his lover kissing his scars ever so lightly. The warmth of his lips leaving goosebumps on the skin they left. It felt so good, to have that warmth. Not even of Iruka's physical presence, but of the love that the man showed him every day. It had taken Kakashi quite some time to get used to the idea, as the mental scars were just as deep, and more jagged than the physical ones. There were times in the beginning where he had lashed out at Iruka, feeling that his personal space was being encroached on. But then, he realized that his personal space had become entirely too personal, and that he had been isolating himself so long that it had become...slightly unhealthy, to say the least.
But this, god, there was nothing like this. This sweet man, so innocent and loving, loving him for things that were so unsightly.
It had become something of a routine. Kakashi would come home from a particularly draining mission, somewhat depressed and feeling unlike the man that had emerged once Iruka had cracked his hard shell. Iruka would greet him with a particularly long embrace, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. Kakashi would say something off-hand about his scars or joints from previous injuries aching in the cold or rain or whatever inclimate weather he had been experiencing wherever in the world that he was, and Iruka would begin, sliding down Kakashi's mask and kissing the scar beneath an above the Sharingan, running his hands through Kakashi's hair and allowing one to rest on the opposite cheek. Then, he would kiss the jounin full on, fisting his shirt and pushing him toward the bedroom. Most of Iruka's clothes, usually except his boxers- but on this particular occasion, his pants were left on, as well-would come off quickly. Iruka would slowly undress Kakashi, kissing each scar as it arose with each piece of clothing that was removed. Iruka took an exceptional amount of time on the crook of Kakashi's neck, knowing that kisses and caresses on that particular area were especially appreciated by the jounin. He often left love marks and small bites, knowing that the area would be covered from public view at all times, anyway. Iruka's soft touches with calloused, scarred hands left radiations of warmth up Kakashi's spine and always made him shiver and frequently elicited a moan.
If Kakashi had to be perfectly honest, if he could guarantee every mission would come with a welcome home party like this, he would take all of them in the village, including genin-class. He loved the adoration that seemed to radiate off of Iruka during this ritual. He loved the attention, and if he was being truly honest with himself...
this was better than the sex.
Iruka, celebrating his imperfections, giving him so much adoration and affection was something Kakashi was sure he would never tire of. It was a feeling unlike any other in the world, even thinking about their ritual gave him goosebumps and made him fidget. He felt he understood why, after denying himself small joys like this for so long, it simply felt so good to be touched this way. Sure, he had had sex with men and women in the times he had segregated himself from society, but nothing like this.
Iruka loved making him feel this way. He loved the joy that Kakashi got out of this, the goosebumps that rose on the older man's skin when he kissed him. He knew what Kakashi had been through. Knew that he had purposefully denied himself any kind of affection other than strictly sexual for so long. But this, this was so different. He loved this. Though he could be insufferably stubborn at times, he was sweet, caring and loving, more so than Iruka could have ever imagined. He loved this man. And he loved making him feel this way. He deserved it, after all.
