This is a ONESHOT so please don't ask for more chapters.
Pairing: 1827 / HibarixTsuna
Warning: Contains depressing thoughts of suicide.
SAVING ME
I've never once thought of suicide, and still I stand here on the roof of my school wondering if it's high enough to kill me if I just so happened to fall. The height didn't scare me, or the fact that my feet were just inches from the edge, but the thought of dying without a friend in the world scared me. I would be alone in Heaven as I am in the real world.
Although I have never contemplated suicide, I have self-harmed, cut myself to feel that small second of bliss. But, as fate has a sick sense of humour, it wasn't long before I, being Dame-Tsuna, got careless with covering up marks that littered my arms, and rumours started spreading. So here I stand with the great blue sky above me, I know I don't want to die, to leave nothing I had behind, to cause suffering to my parents. But I would however, love to fall, to feel a force pull me down and to feel the wind rush past me.
As the rain began to fall, scattering its love in small droplets across the land, I just knew I had to do it, to jump off the edge. To feel the freedom of weightlessness for those small brief seconds and enjoy every precious moment it gives me. If I should so happen to die, I want you, Kami-sama to look after my mother and father, because they have looked after me.
My heart was pounding, the voices in my head all screaming at each other and my hands began to shake. I needed to jump, needed to feel that moment of weightlessness.
'I don't want any bodies littering my school, herbivore.'
I froze. That cold, harsh voice could only belong to one person. I could feel those piercing eyes burn into my back, that stoic face and cruel hands would be ready to beat me once I step down, but this was my only chance. When would I ever be brave enough to even get to this point?
'Herbivore. If you don't get down here right now, I will personally bite you death'
'Either way is fine'
I couldn't stop myself, the words came out before my mind had registered anything.
'Do you want to die?'
'I want to fall'
'Is that not the same thing?'
He was right, in this circumstance it was. I would fall and then die.
'Yes. And it will free me'
'You will make a mess on my grounds. Do it somewhere else.'
'Here is fine'
I felt those cruel eyes narrow and become fierce, his teeth clamped together.
'Get down.'
'No.'
'Sawada, if you don't get down right now, I will make your life a living misery.'
'I'll have no life to destroy.'
I heard him growl, he was angry. Suddenly, I felt my world spin round and I came into contact with the ground. I saw him staring down at me, his anger becoming visible in an evil aura that surrounded him. The rain had drenched us both as we stared at each other, eyes burning into each other in a comfortable silence.
He flew on top on me, straddling my hips so I couldn't move. Then hit me.
'Do you think escape is the way out of everything?'
I felt my tears mix with the rain water, my face stinging.
'You're an idiot. A selfish idiot.'
Selfish? Time seemed to have no meaning as we kept staring at each other, his words echoed through my mind. I would be leaving behind my family, causing pain and suffering to them, leaving them with horrible questions unanswered.
'You're an idiot.'
'You said that.'
'Have you not thought about those you'll leave behind? Your mother? Your father? Your frien-'
'I HAVE NONE!'
I finally closed my eyes for a while, I had just shouted at the schools most feared and treacherous member.
'DON'T YOU GET IT? I'M ALONE IN THIS WORLD AND ALWAYS WILL BE, I ONLY HAVE MY MOTHER FOR COMPANY. I LIVE ALONE.'
My words seemed to make an impact. My blurry vision saw his eyes widen and his mouth was slightly open. Was he speechless?
'And what about me?'
You? What about you… I didn't know how to answer.
'I've been watching you, Tsunayoshi. From the first day you were late.'
I felt my cheeks heat up, a change from the cold water that struck me. But he was lying, even is he had watched me, it didn't mean he was a friend!
'You're cruel… Hibari-san. You expect me to change my mind suddenly because you've been watching me? Watching me get beaten up and stood by, watch me cry and not comforted me? WHY SHOULD SOMETHING LIKE THAT MAKE ME NOT WANT TO KILL MYSELF?'
'Because I like you.'
So blunt. I had no idea how to react. Was this even possible? Hibari was a lone wolf, not someone who wants baggage to have to take care of.
'You're brave enough to scream at me, Tsunayoshi, and yet you cower when others approach you. You are weak and pathetic. And yet, I find you intriguing, you blend in with the other fools in this school. And yet I find myself drawn to you. Why is that?'
'…I-I don't know.'
'Of course you don't. You're such an annoying, clumsy, boring boy and yet you manage to make me feel like protecting you and holding you. You're small cries make me want to hold you and I can see those bruises and cuts you try to hide.'
I felt his hand lock fingers with my own, his eyes still locked on to my own, not moving, not wavering. His head leant down and rested on my forehead, our noses touching and out lips just centimetres apart.
'I like you, Tsunayoshi.'
His cold lips met with mine. It was an awkward and tense kiss, the only sound was the pitter patter of rain and my heart thumping through my chest. The warmth was nice, the way he held my hands tightly, the way he seemed to kiss me gently. When we separated he stared at me again, this time I felt uncomfortable under his gaze.
'You're cute when you do that.'
'W-Wha? Shut up! You did it so suddenly I di-Oomph!'
His kissed me again, harder this time, his lips really pressing against mine. I closed my eyes and felt him lick my bottom lip, gasping a little I allowed him to slip his tongue in. That muscle wandered around my mouth and danced with my own tongue. It felt so good I had completely forgotten it was raining.
I felt his hand caress my face as the water slid down my cheeks, I was unsure whether it was rain or tears.
He raised his head, both of us panting slightly. His face seemed to a little pink whereas I knew mine was bright red. I smiled at him, and saw him raise an eyebrow in return. I didn't need a smile back, this was more than enough.
He pulled me up and I sat in his legs, my arms wrapped around his neck whilst his held me tightly by the waist. We were both so wet through that our clothes stuck together, but we didn't complain. I finally felt like I had someone to live for.
I felt his hand stroke my back lightly, his chin resting on my shoulder, our cheeks touching. The heat between us made the rain seem like a shower. I buried my head into his hair, smelling it slightly, and whispered:
'Thank you, Hibari-san.'
'For what?'
'Saving me.'
'… You're welcome.'
END
