Hey folks.*glances dismally at Fanfiction.net crowd* Wassup?

Vegeta: What sort of question is that?

Kayfig: Apparently not one to be answered.

Vegeta: WRITE THE TORTURE FIC ABOUT ME NOW!!!

Kayfig: Do you even know what the word "torture" means?

Vegeta: **sniffs** 'Course I do. **secretly flipping through dictionary*

Kayfig: **raises eyebrow** Oh REALLY?

Vegeta: YEAH! Here's the er.meaning of the word right here! **pointing at book**

Kayfig: Lemme see it then!

Vegeta: Uh.lost my page?

Kayfig: You're pathetic...

Vegeta: TOO MANY BIG WORDS!!!!!

Kayfig: That's nothing...what about supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?

Vegeta: Uhm..I know I'm not particularly smart or anything, but I'm pretty sure you spelled that wrong.

Kayfig: **sniffs** Shows what you know.

Vegeta: ..

Kayfig: OH..and in case you folks were dying to know, I don't own DBZ..**points** But Gourry does.

Gourry: . THIS ISN'T A SLAYERS FIC!!!!

Kayfig: It could've been.

Lina: She's got you there, Gourry.

Gourry: AHHHHHHH-GO AWAY..you're ruining the original purpose of the fic!!!!

Vegeta: There was a purpose? Er..yeah, what the dumb blond said!

Gourry: WHY YOU- ************

Chapter 1: All's Fair In Love, War, and Camping

Vegeta smiled as he took a shower, the greatest glee filling his usually dark and evil heart. And do you want to know WHY the Sayian prince was smiling?

Of course you do.

The reason the prince was smiling was a simple, but lovely one. Bulma, Trunks, Goku, and all their other stupid Earth friends were going on a stupid camping trip, where they would most likely get eaten by large woodland creatures.

Thus the reason for the smiling.

Vegeta's thoughts of happiness were quickly threatened by a dark cloud, when he heard movement on the other side of the bathroom door.

"Hello?" A cruelly familiar voice said.

Vegeta twitched. Why did it HAVE TO BE that infernal idiot Kakkorot? WHY, OH WHY, DID IT HAVE TO BE **HIM** OUT OF ALL PEOPLE?! Vegeta remained quiet. Maybe if he didn't make any noise, Kakkarot would just get bored and go away. Five minutes passed until all cries died away, and Vegeta let out a breath.

BIG MISTAKE.

"OH, there you are!" Goku cried with joy, as he moved aside the shower curtain.

"GAH-CLOSE THAT AT ONCE YOU FOOL! CAN'T YOU SEE I'M NAKED!?" Vegeta cried in disgust and fury, as water poured down on his head and got all over the bathroom floor.

Goku smiled stupidly and began to undress. "I was just thinking how great it would be to take a shower, Vegeta. And look-you being so thoughtful and starting one for me!"

Twitch.

Goku began tugging on his pants..

"STOP!"

Goku looked up quickly, confusion spanning across his face. "What's wrong, Vegeta?"

"Uhm..er..you see." "What?" Goku asked, looking around. "See what?"

Vegeta slapped his forehead and instantly regretted it. I mean, it kinda hurt after all. "What I'm TRYING to say is..."

Goku hopped up and down in excitement. "Wait, LEMME GUESS!"

Vegeta sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. "Do whatever," He muttered irritably, trying to use the remainder of the shower curtain as a shield from the cold.

Goku smiled and thumbed his chin, pretending to think. ( Ka: Which is pretty much just for show, since he can't..^_^ I'm so mean to Goku sometimes!) After a lot of drooling, the mouse managed to get the cheese (referring to Goku's though process), and Goku smiled stupidly. "I KNOW!"

Vegeta fumbled with the soap and looked up at Goku. "What?"

Goku frowned. "Wait, I forgot."

Vegeta felt a massive twitch coming on as he looked away. He hated Kakkorot for ruining his time alone-the only time alone he ever got. "Aren't you supposed to be on a camping trip getting eaten?" He demanded of the stupid one. (A.k.a Goku)

Goku jumped up and down with a squeal of delight, which caused Vegeta to fall over in startled and horrified surprise. (Ka: ^.^)

"THAT'S RIGHT!" Goku shrieked with insanity. "I'M SUPPOSED TO TELL YOU THE NEWS UPDATE ABOUT THE CAMPING TRIP!"

Vegeta twitched for real this time. "What 'News Update?'" He demanded on the brink of dry-mouthed fear.

"SINCE CHI-CHI'S AFRAID I'LL HURT MYSELF, SHE TOLD ME TO STAY WITH YOU FOR THE MONTH THEY WERE GONE!"

Vegeta was silent for a moment, his worst and most terrible nightmares unfolding before his very eyes. "She told you to do WHAT?!"

"To stay with you, silly!" Goku said with a good-natured giggle.

Vegeta fainted.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Ka: It's fun to be mean to Vegeta sometimes too, huh?!

Vegeta: **sniffs** Well I didn't think it was funny.

Goku: I DID!!!!! **giggles** ^.^

Vegeta: **looks at Goku** I hate you.

Ka: **hugs them both** Isn't this soooooooooooooo cute?!

Vegeta: _O **twitch**

Ka: REVIEW!!!!!!! (Please?)

If you do, I'll update soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!