It's been two years.
Two years since he's been gone. At first, the reality never hit that he was never coming back, but I soon realised that my own husband was dead. Even when I watched his two brothers put him in his final resting place, I did not believe it. It hit me on a cool April morning, April second to be exact. I woke up alone as I always did, but something felt different. Perhaps it was because it was my birthday. It took me awhile to want to get out of bed, as always these days, but when I did, I opened the curtains to see a beautiful, but errie haze over the lake near to where I now lived alone. I peered further out, my eyes adapting to the early morning light that had just appeared in the sky with brilliant colours of pink and orange. I sighed softly and played with my messy silver hair, thinking today was to be a long one.
"Happy birthday, Hidan." I smiled, but it was fake. Every smile these past two years was fake. There was something wrong with me, but I'm not one to call help. I was never emotionally attached to people, until I had met Itachi Uchiha, or my late husband, if you will. I looked over and frowned at the book laying on Itachi's old side of the bed. I hadn't bothered putting anything of his away. A small fucked sentimental part of me screamed 'keep it' whenever I tried to get rid of anything, including the brown hardcover book I had given Itachi for christmas three years ago. I stared the book down and noticed a blue corner sticking out of it, along with the usual bookmark with the cheesey 'You were born an original, don't die a copy' on it in cursive font. I walked over slowly and picked up with hardcover of The Lost Symbol, by Dan Brown in my pale hands. I was born albino, so my skin was always as pale as snow. My hair a silver/blond colour, which scared people at times, along with my magenta eyes, which now scanned over the cover with a city on it. "..." I sighed, then stepped back as if the spot I was standing on was on fire, when the blue corner fell out of the book to reveal it to be an envolope. When it fell to the carpet, landing face up, my breath caught in my throat. What was the envolope for? Was it something I wanted to know? Or was it something I was not suppose to find out; with the bad timing of Itachi's death. I sent a quick prayer to Itachi to forgive me, then bent over, snatching the letter up with my free hand. I laid the book back down in the spot where my late lover had placed it the night before he died and focused on the pale blue envolope. I opened it slowly and pulled the paper out like it would turn to ash like an ancient script. "......" my eyes began to scan over the piece of paper to figure out it was a letter to me.
Dear Hidan,
As you know, your birthday is tomorrow. Yes, I am writing this as you're sleeping beside me. I want you to know that I love you. Whatever the future brings, be aware of that. I know how you get, since you have a huge head. Now, I know that you've wanted children for a long time. Sorry I am not a girl. I wish I could give you such a thing, however, the next best thing I can do is agree to the adoption process that I tried so hard to avoid. I am not a fan of kids, you know that. However, it doesn't matter to me anymore. Because as hard as my exterior is, you know the real me. And the real me loves you more than anyone ever will. This letter does not seem as if I wrote it, but I swear it is, you should know the writing.
When you get this, I will not be home, I will be at work. Call me ASAP so I know you've read it. I'll see you tonight, have a great birthday. I can't wait to see you later.
Love,
Itachi.
My eyes widened as the note ended. All the two years of shallow stupidity of doubt finally came back and hit me upside the head like how my mother used to. I fell over and landed on the carpeted floor with a thud. However, I made no groan, since the all the words were gone from my head. All I could do was stare at the note. My vision started to blur, a clear sign of tears. Then, without another word, just the sudden sound of a raven in the distance, I began to cry. I had never cried that much in my life.
When I awoke, the sun was shining in on my face. I looked around the room to figure out I was still on the floor. I tilted my head the other way, which made my eyes shift to the dark lighting of under my bed, where dust and old drawings resided. My eyes adapted to that part of darkness and I reached under the bed, but stopped when I saw Itachi, his face pale with death. His hand stopped mine from grabbing a painting he had done. The cool feel of his hand in his unliving state brought gooseflesh to the surface of my pale skin.
"Don't you touch that."
"For FUCK'S SAKE!" I breathed, my eyes opening widely to meet the same sun I thought I had. I quickly shifted my head to under the bed, but this time, there was no dead husband. I sighed in relief to see I was out of the nightmare that I had just had. My house phone rang off in the annoying melody Itachi had set one day to piss me off. I pussied out of changing that too. "... Fuck." I growled and stood up, making my way over to the phone. I looked at the caller I.D to see D&S Akasuna lighted up in green. I picked up the phone and smiled slightly. It was always good to have my best friend Deidara call. "Hello?"
"Hey Hidan, un!" the happy voice of my childhood best friend, Deidara Iwa, now Akasuna, rang into my ears. He was from a japanese culture inriched family, so the 'un' was always present in his speech.
"Oh hey. What's up?"
"Your birthday silly!" Deidara giggled. I smiled, almost feeling the need to laugh at the over joied attitude my friend always sported.
"Oh, I noticed that." I said sarcastically. I heard a scoff, then silence from the other end.
"Are you okay, un? How are you.... Umm, holding up?" the voice of my dear friend becomming concered. Oh I wish I could have told him how much I was hurting. But Hidan Kalovar would never ask for help. Never.
"I'm alright, thanks." I smiled weakly. I heard a satisfied 'un' from the other side of the phone.
"Okay! Well, you know the cottage that Sasori owned. The one we went to.... A few years ago." Short for, when your husband was alive. No one tried to meantion Itachi around me, but I'm not an idiot, so I see right through it though. It feels like I have pity thrusted upon me everywhere I go.
"Yes, I know that cottage. Go on?"
"Well... I wanted to know if you'd come down! You might meet someone, un~" the blond purred from the other side of the phone, into my ear. I cracked a smile then, feeling as though an animated sweat drop would appear by my head, like a cartoon show. Of course Deidara would want me to be with someone. It was true I was tired of the lonliness, but I missed Itachi. It would feel as though I cheated if I had sex with someone else.
"Oh I don't know-"
"Hidan, you're twenty-four. Move on. I'm sorry, but Itachi would want that. He would never want you to sit home alone day in, day out. So please come!?"
And Even though it seemed like the worst idea ever at the time, I decided to say yes to Deidara's idea. Not to meet someone else, but to simply get away. I did not want to move on, so just the same, I would not.
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So, I decided this will be my new story that I will hopefully finish. :) I hope it's not too bad... R&R if you want :') it would be very much appreciated.
