Prompt: Frequent Flier Miles
Title: Beyond The Wall
Song: When I Fall
Artist: Sam Phillips
Disclaimer: All characters mentioned herein are without prejudice property of the MPA. No infringement of copyright is intended.
When I Fall
Jason and Sonny stood wordlessly in the elevator as it climbed to the fourth floor of Harborview Towers. Both men were utterly exhausted and doing their best to stand straight and not sag against the walls of the elevator as it counted off the floors. They had just gotten back from a grueling three-day trip to Puerto Rico; an unpleasant situation had arisen and threatened to erupt in the face of everything if they didn't rush down there to contain it. And so they had – they dropped everything and boarded the jet as soon as they got the news. And after three days filled with irritable employees, several fatal threats, two major explosions, and very little sleep, the men were finally back in Port Charles.
Jason had been upset by their sudden departure but had boarded the plane without complaint; the younger man knew what was at stake. Sonny didn't press him for any information but he could tell that something had changed with his partner. And finally, as they boarded the jet in Puerto Rico, Jason had remarked that he couldn't wait to get home to Elizabeth.
And now the men were back at Sonny's penthouse, ready to sort through the last details and square things away with the men they'd left in charge on the island. It was just a matter of tying up some loose ends before everyone would be able to sleep easier, and despite the fatigue that had worn away at their bodies for the past three days, Sonny and Jason wanted to take care of things sooner rather than later.
Sonny pushed the door of his penthouse open and trudged in, tossing the manila folders he carried onto his desk. Johnny O'Brien, his top guard and next-in-command after Jason, was catching a quick nap on the couch and sprang up as soon as Jason shut the door with his foot.
"Boss," he greeted the Cuban quickly, standing up and brushing the wrinkles out of his tan pants. "Jason." His eyes were a little blurred from sleep but quickly focused when he blinked repeatedly, not taking his gaze off the blonde enforcer. "Jason, you're not supposed to be here."
Sonny's eyes snapped up to meet Johnny's green ones, searching for any sign of humor. But he found none. "What?"
Jason, too, was staring at the guard quizzically, and it was all Johnny could do to shake his head furiously. "No, no, Jason, you're not supposed to be here right now."
The enforcer blinked as Johnny pulled the door open and all but shoved him towards it. "Johnny? What's going on?"
"It's Elizabeth. You have to go find her." That got his attention quickly.
"Elizabeth?" Jason repeated, alarmed. "Did something happen to her? Is she hurt?"
"No, no," Johnny answered quickly, regretting his earlier answer and looking sincerely apologetic for scaring his boss. "No, she's fine. It's just that she's…leaving."
Sonny blinked in surprise, certain that he had heard wrong. "What? Leaving? Is that what you said?"
"What do you mean, she's leaving?" Jason questioned him suspiciously. "Why? Where? When?"
"I don't know!" Johnny burst out. "All I know is that I sent Corelli there this morning to check up on her and he called and said that she wouldn't let him in the studio – that she was moving things around and when he yelled to her she said something about not being around much longer." The Irishman shook his head helplessly. "I don't know what's going on, but I'm pretty sure she's leaving."
"Does this have anything to do with whatever happened between you two before we left?" Sonny asked quietly. He had refrained from obtaining any information about Elizabeth while in Puerto Rico, especially since they had bigger things to worry about, but now he just couldn't hold it back any longer. "Jason?"
"I-I don't know," the enforcer got out, backing toward the door. "We-" His eyes widened as he replayed that night on her couch in his mind. He had kissed her that night for the first time and she had responded, he was certain. But then he had gotten that phone call from Sonny to leave immediately for Puerto Rico with him and had to rush out. He had told Elizabeth he'd try to hurry back and it wasn't until now that he realized her silence might have meant something else. She had been very quiet as he pulled on his shoes and his jacket, and she had barely met his gaze when he called out that he'd see her later. He hadn't thought much of it earlier, but based on Johnny's news he was forced to look at it in another light.
The kiss.
She didn't like it.
"Oh, fuck," Jason hissed, spinning around on his heel. He was halfway to the elevator before Sonny or Johnny could blink. "I have to go!"
Underwear. T-shirts. Sandals. Sunscreen? Sure, why not?
Elizabeth Webber was bent over her tiny dresser, opening drawers and emptying the contents onto the floor. She scooped up a pair of shorts, a couple skirts, and grabbed a few pairs of socks and then raced to her little couch to deposit all the items into an open duffel bag.
A pair of jeans and a hairbrush were thrown in on top of the clothes and Elizabeth quickly scanned her studio for her little travel kit that contained disposable razors and the like.
Thinking that it was probably in the closet, she pulled the door open and dropped to the floor to rummage. Finding a pair of tennis shoes that looked particularly comfortable, she continued rooting through the junk on her closet floor until she finally found the little pink travel kit.
She stood up with her shoes and the kit as well as a raincoat that she had pulled out just in case it was raining wherever she ended up. At this point, she didn't even know where she was going. And she didn't even care. The main point was to leave. And fast.
The past couple of days had gone by in a blur. She wasn't even sure she could recount the events if asked to do so. The only thing she knew was that she had been crying her heart out to Jason that night on her studio and somehow they had ended up kissing. She stopped in the door of the closet, clutching her shoes, raincoat and that damn little travel bag to her chest as the memories of that kiss came back to her.
His hands had been cupping her face, holding her as gently as if she were a china doll. And God, his mouth was so soft. The kiss hadn't been very deep, but when he had pulled back at the ring of that infernal cell phone of his, she had been able to taste him on her lips.
Swearing inwardly, Elizabeth continued to root through her closet for a sweatshirt to bring along in case it got cold. She didn't know how they had ended up kissing or who had started it. The only thing she knew was that it was wrong and it couldn't happen again. He was her best friend – he was Jason – and she had kissed him. It was wrong and despicable on so many levels.
For the past four years, their friendship had been strictly platonic and very…safe. She couldn't lie and say that she didn't think Jason was handsome, because he was. It was just that she had thought of him only in terms of a friend – a brother, almost. Kinda. A little. OK, maybe not so much. There was the matter of that little dream she had about him when he was…
Shaking her head briskly, Elizabeth renewed her efforts to find that damn sweatshirt. She had spent the next few days in a haze after that. She didn't know how she felt about him being called away on business, and she didn't know if it was dangerous or not. All she knew was that one minute they were kissing – yikes – and the next, he was running toward the door with his leather jacket only half on.
The days without him had given her time to think – even if her thoughts weren't of a completely coherent nature. She had remembered all the times they had been together – watching a movie, playing pool at Jake's, going for a midnight ride – and the platonic nature of those memories made the kiss seem more and more outlandish and wrong.
Sometimes she had succumbed to the belief that it didn't really happen – that somehow, she had dreamed it all up. After all, she was an avid day-dreamer. But every time she set eyes on her red couch by the window, she knew. She knew that it had happened.
But it wasn't until this morning that she had snapped completely. Francis Corelli, one of the bodyguards under Jason's command, had stopped by to presumably check up on her. She was rearranging her easels when she first heard him knock, and that was when she had frozen. He had knocked repeatedly, calling out to her and she had feebly replied that she was there. He had said something about Jason coming back sometime today and that was when she had lost it.
She didn't know why, but the idea of being at the studio when Jason came scared her. She had no idea what to do when he got there, she had no idea what to say to him – she had no idea about anything anymore. Would they go back to being friends and just pretend that it never happened? Would Jason insist on talking about it? Would he want a relationship?
That just couldn't happen. She ruined every single relationship she ever got herself into – the other person always ended up hating her after they were done. She just couldn't bear to let her relationship with Jason end up that way, too. He was the best thing in her life along with her Gram. But Gram was gone and she had been so worried that Jason would be, too. He'd convinced her that he would never leave, but then they had to go and kiss on it. Jesus Christ. Biggest. Mistake. Ever.
And that was when she decided that she had to leave.
She didn't know where and she didn't know for how long. She'd decide when she got there. She'd just dump her crap in the car, get in, and drive. That was the plan. And from where she was standing, it looked pretty good.
She found the sweatshirt and threw the kit toward the couch, pleased when it landed next to the duffel bag. In one hand she held the white PCU sweatshirt she had purchased but never worn and in the other she held her reversible turquoise and yellow raincoat. The only matter now was to decide which she was going to bring. Should she bring both? Or just pick one?
She was so lost in the trivial deliberations that the hard knock on her door scared her completely, causing her to almost lose her balance. She stopped and stared at the heavy steel door, wondering if she had just heard the knock in her head.
No such luck.
The knocking sounded again, louder this time and accompanied by a familiar voice. "Elizabeth!"
Her heart thudded painfully in her chest and she swore for a minute that it had stopped completely. It was him. He was back and she was…still here. Damn it. "Uh…" Why the hell couldn't she form a coherent thought! But before she had time to try harder, Jason pounded on the door once more and she heard the dreaded jingle of keys in his hand.
"Elizabeth, I'm coming in!" It took him no time to unlock the heavy steel door and fling it open, and there he stood. Tall, strong, and looking deliciously flustered and out of breath from his sprint up the stairs. The wind had tousled his hair and made his cheeks red, and those intense cerulean orbs of his were wet and glistening from his reckless motorcycle ride over to her studio. And suddenly, Elizabeth was torn between the survivalist urge to run out the door and the surprisingly strong urge to run into his arms.
Jason's hands were balled into fists at his side and he swept a gaze around her unkempt studio, his nostrils flaring. Finally, his eyes met hers. "You're really leaving."
She balked a little. "Who told you that?"
The enforcer stalked into the room, kicking the door shut with the heel of his motorcycle boot – hard. "The guards."
"Oh, crap," Elizabeth huffed as she crossed her arms over her chest, hugging the sweatshirt and the bright raincoat close to her body. "Stupid Francis can't keep his damn mouth shut."
"Is it true?" The question was all but a snarl, coming up with a low growl from the back of his throat. Jason had stepped up soundlessly while she was cursing the bodyguard and now stood less than a pace away from her and suddenly, Elizabeth found it impossible to breathe. "Is it?"
Her voice was a whisper torn from her lips as her doe-like eyes slowly rose to meet his. "Yes."
Jason closed his eyes shut as that single word washed over him, bringing with it an onslaught of confusion, regret, pain, and even anger. She was leaving. She was leaving Port Charles. She was leaving him. Of all the people in his life that he knew he couldn't count on – everyone that had tried to kick him when he was down, everyone that simply cut their losses and walked away – he never figured that Elizabeth would be one of them. And the knowledge that she was almost ripped his heart in two.
We don't want lives of steel
We don't want hearts that feel
Blue steel met soft sapphire. "Were you planning on telling me?"
She dipped her head, and Jason watched with a stony glare in place as a soft pink blush fanned out across her porcelain cheeks, speaking for itself. She hadn't planned on telling him. He wasn't supposed to have known. She didn't want him to know. And even though he had been trying so hard at that moment to keep his emotions in check, the sight of that embarrassed blush caused the dam to break and the flood waters spilled forth.
"You didn't want me to know." The words were harsh and bitter, terse and clipped as he flung them at her. "I was supposed to come home to – to what, Elizabeth? To your empty studio? To your answering machine? What was supposed to happen, Elizabeth?"
"Jason, I-"
"You were going to leave." His voice was low, the statement issuing forth on a barely controlled growl. "You weren't even going to say goodbye to me, were you?" She blinked and looked away, and red hot anger coursed through Jason's body. Pivoting on one foot and pinching the bridge of his nose, the enforcer uttered every single dirty word that came to mind.
Just three days ago, they had been sitting in this room just being together. Everything was the way it was supposed to be. Three days ago – she was curled up on the couch, her hair falling in her face and her eyes glassy with tears. And he was underneath her, soothing her body as it convulsed with sobs. She had spilled her greatest fears that night – fears of becoming like her parents, fears of pushing him away – and he got through to her like he always did. And when he'd kissed her…It had felt so right. It was such a huge relief to finally feel those warm, soft lips under his, to hear her little whimper hover between them when they broke for air. It was something he had always wanted but denied himself.
Kissing her felt like coming home.
But knowing that it upset her, that she regretted it…few things had hurt more. He wasn't happy about having to leave, no, but it wasn't like he did it on purpose. He had wanted to talk to her, to confess about how he felt and how he had felt for a long time, but that just hadn't been possible. And all the way on the flight back home, he had thought of coming home to her for that long overdue conversation.
All the things he'd felt that night and since – the incredible and almost ethereal elation, the light nervousness, the butterflies, the hope and optimism – all that disappeared, leaving him feeling cold. She had told him that night that she wished she didn't love her parents because then they couldn't hurt her anymore. And standing there in front of the petite brunette, gazing numbly around at her possessions strewn about the studio, Jason Morgan finally understood what she had really meant by that.
We want to live above it all"What am I supposed to say, Elizabeth?" Her eyes filled with tears at the defeat in his voice. She could see the simmering anger and profound grief in his expressive eyes, but she had only to blink and that stony mask of indifference and detachment came over his face. She had blinked, but she hadn't missed the look in his eyes.
"Jason, I have to leave," she replied quietly in a voice that was much stronger than she felt. "I have to get out of here."
Hearing her say the words aloud brought a little spark back to his frozen figure, and Jason quickly closed the distance between them in one long stride. "Why?"
It was a question but it sounded like a demand. Elizabeth could barely breathe as his stormy blue eyes bore into hers, probing and challenging her to answer him. "I just…things are…I think a change would be…"
"Is this about the kiss?" He didn't even blink as the words left his mouth, just resumed staring down at her as she blushed an even brighter shade of crimson.
Elizabeth quickly averted her gaze, feeling almost skittish under his dark glare. Sh!t. This wasn't going well at all; it was different from all the other times she and Jason fought. He was angrier now than she'd ever remembered him, and he had all the reasons to be. After all, she had been planning to leave town without telling him. Hell, that was still what she wanted to do. But the way he was looking at her…there was something else swirling about in his eyes along with the anger, and she just wished she could recognize what it was.
"Answer me, Elizabeth." His voice was low and husky as he prowled closer, moving slowly and as gracefully as a panther. Jason's eyes, glittering and intense, never strayed from hers as his body drew up close to hers. Heat radiated off of him, and she could smell his masculine scent of leather and pine trees, the crisp, clean scent that always enveloped him. She drank it in like wine as her mind flew back without her permission to that steamy kiss on the couch.
His warm breath mingled with hers, caressing her lips and cheeks when he spoke once more, and shivers ran up and down her body. "Is this about the kiss?"
I feel you closing inA target on my skin
She couldn't answer him even if she wanted to. She didn't know where to begin; she didn't know how to even try. It was such a loaded question that sounded incredibly sensual the way he said it in that rough sandpaper voice that brought goosebumps to her skin.
Her silence, however, seemed to be all the answer that Jason needed. The enforcer turned his head to the side and let a long breath whistle out through his teeth. Elizabeth was nervously mangling her lush lower lip when he faced her again. Their bodies were still close together, almost touching, as if somehow magnetically drawn together and it took an actual effort on Jason's part to back away.
"Jason, I-"
"You could have said something," he replied quietly, interrupting her and letting his hands fall to his hips. His leather jacket parted, revealing the silver Glock strapped into the waistband of his jeans, but when the enforcer noticed the way Elizabeth quickly averted her gaze he dropped the hand to his side in order to shield the weapon from her view. "You could have told me, Elizabeth-"
"When?" she demanded suddenly, looking up at him bluntly with a defiant spark in her eyes. Her shoulders squared and her chin tilted up a notch, she directed the same look of pure challenge at him. "When would I have told you, Jason? Would it have been in the two seconds it took you to get from the couch to the door? I mean, I know I talk pretty fast, but, hey, come on."
The muscle in his jaw ticked twice as she rambled on, quirking a slender eyebrow at him. She was challenging him, throwing it all back in his face and he'd be damned if he let her.
"You know what I mean, Elizabeth," he bit out. "You could have stayed and faced me and told me the truth about what you felt instead of just running off. Did you think that I just wouldn't notice that you were missing? That I'd walk around in a confused and oblivious haze until you were brave enough to show your face again?"
She opened her mouth open, readying a retort, but was unprepared when his intense blue eyes softened and he shook his head once helplessly.
"I thought we were better than that, Elizabeth."
I think you'll be there when I fallHe shifted, subconsciously edging closer, and had to forcefully resist the urge to raise his hand and cup her cheek in his palm like he was so accustomed to doing. "We've always talked to each other, Elizabeth, about everything. I always thought that if something like this happened and threatened our friendship, we'd be able to talk about it. I never wanted anything to ruin our…friendship, Elizabeth. I always thought you felt the same way."
She shook her head ruefully. "Don't you see, Jason? That's exactly what this is about. The ki-Jason, we can't do this." Her sapphire orbs sought his, pleading with him to try to understand, but Jason was still stinging from her inability to even say the word 'kiss'. "That's just the point: we're friends. You're my best friend, Jason, and I know I'm yours. And for us to…" She had to struggle to make the word come out. "…kiss is just wrong. That's what could possibly ruin our friendship, Jason."
Her socked feet shuffled on the floor of the studio. "And, yeah, I was afraid. And that's why I wanted to leave. I needed to get out, Jason."
"Why can't it work?"
She blinked, taken aback at his soft question. "W-What?"
Jason's gaze didn't stray from hers. "Why can't it work?"
A strangled laugh escaped her as Elizabeth ran a trembling hand through her wavy chocolate locks. "Jason, are you listening to yourself? Why can't it work?" She was shaking her head as she repeated his question. "B-Because! You're you and I'm me!"
He just quirked a brow humorlessly at her, this time silently asking if she was listening to herself. Elizabeth huffed in frustration and wrapped her arms defensively around her middle, hugging herself tightly. "We've been best friends for four years, Jason – four years. And now we-we both messed up and suddenly threw ourselves into a lurch. I'm with you on this one, Jason – I don't want anything to ruin our friendship. Especially not some kiss that didn't mean anything."
Jason's jaw ticked in response to that, but he stopped himself from pointing out the obvious contradiction in her impassioned response: if it meant nothing, as she claimed, then why were they both making such a big deal about it? "So you were just going to pack up and leave."
"Yes," she answered clearly, blinking up at him. "Because that was the best thing to do."
We might get out of timeWe might connect our minds
"Do you still think so?" he growled out, curling his fingers into fists again.
Elizabeth shuffled her feet awkwardly. "I do."
The enforcer only raised one eyebrow as the corner of his mouth twitched. "You weren't even going to try to fix it?"
She blinked back tears at the accusation in his voice. "What's…How can we fix it, Jason?"
That was the call to action he needed. His blue eyes glittered in the dimly lit studio as he claimed another step, not even flinching when Elizabeth skittered backwards. "You can stay. You can talk to me, Elizabeth. We can fix this."
We might land beyond the wallWhen I fall
She swallowed hard, pursing her lips together for a moment as she gathered her wits about her. "It shouldn't have happened, Jason." She expected him to say something, but the energy that had just lit up his eyes seemed to suddenly fizzle out and Jason remained silent. "I was just really upset and you were trying to calm me down like you always do. I'm sorry that I laid all of that on you; I didn't mean to. I guess I just lost it when I found about my parents. But you stayed and talked me through it, and I'm really grateful for that. I guess we both just got caught up in the moment and didn't realize what we were doing and one thing led to another and before we knew it-"
She was rambling, and although he usually listened when she rambled Jason just couldn't concentrate. Again, his gaze was slowly making its way across her studio. He took in the duffel bag that was sitting on her couch, stuffed to capacity, and the pile of sweaters and random accessories heaped on the floor by the sofa. Elizabeth was still rambling when Jason's eyes fell on a certain article of clothing that was painfully familiar to him.
He sidestepped her slowly and Elizabeth stopped talking abruptly, looking at him in disbelief as he slowly ambled over to her couch. When he saw what he was heading for, the brunette wanted to beat her head against the wall for being so stupid.
His large hand clenched the buttery leather of the black jacket he had given her two years ago. It was lying neatly next to the black duffel bag, and it was clear that Elizabeth had intended to take it with her. Lifting it to his chest, he turned around slowly and faced her, the frost once again claiming his intense eyes.
The look that passed between them needed no explanation. It had just hit Jason once more that she was really leaving. It was something that he just couldn't get over; he had interrogated her about it and she had admitted it, but part of him still couldn't believe it. If their trip had taken longer than it did, he would have come back to Port Charles to find her studio locked and her car gone.
Accusation burned deep within his intense eyes and Elizabeth was powerless to avert her gaze. She just stared back at him, her best friend, as he held the soft black jacket he had given her after they had found the bomb in her studio, wondering how the hell things had gotten so far.
Jason swallowed roughly and tossed the jacket back onto the couch next to her packed bag. His jaw was set when he looked back up and slowly covered the distance between them. "Do you remember what you said about your parents that night?"
She remained silent, watching him guardedly through glassy eyes. Jason exhaled slowly and hooked his thumbs in the belt loops of his jeans.
"You said that you were afraid you'd do something to push me away." His hands balled into fists at his side as the anger seeped slowly through him once more. "That you'd do something to make me leave."
Elizabeth gulped when he cocked his head to the side, watching her, studying her carefully.
"That one day I just wouldn't be able to take it anymore and that I'd leave." His words were cold, stony. "And now you're the one that's leaving, Elizabeth."
She closed her eyes, stepping back a pace and trying to block his words from her mind. It didn't work.
"You told me that you didn't want me to leave, and you turned around and did the same thing to me." His icy eyes bore into hers. "So, go ahead, Elizabeth – leave."
The challenge in his voice, daring her to make good on her initial plan, caused sparks to flare up in Elizabeth's eyes. When she spoke, her voice was just as cold. "You know what, Jason? I changed my mind. I think you should leave."
He swallowed roughly, unwilling to allow any semblance of emotion to run across his tightly set features. "You do."
"I do," she nodded curtly, moving forward and causing Jason to back up toward the closed door. "So leave."
"Fine," he bit out, reaching blindly for the doorknob that he knew was somewhere behind him. "Have a good trip, Elizabeth." He found the knob and pulled it open, letting the door slam against her wall as he stepped into the threshold, almost in the hallway. "Run away like you always do."
Oh, that was it. The one thing about Jason Morgan that was different – that made him stand out from everyone else in her life – was the fact that he could get her fired up like no one else could. An angry fire blazed in Elizabeth's midnight blue eyes as her lips curved into a tight and icy smile.
"Hold it, Morgan!" One small hand fisted in the cotton of his cranberry shirt and Jason allowed her momentum to pull him an inch back into the small studio. "Where the hell do you think you get off-"
"What's the matter, Elizabeth?" he taunted openly, using the advantage of his towering frame to leer down at her. "You don't like that I call it like it is?"
"I am not running away," she seethed, knowing that it was a lie as it came out of her mouth. And to make matters worse, Jason knew it, too.
"You're not?" he feigned, "well, you did one hell of job of fooling me."
"I need a change-"
"You need to get out because you're scared and you're confused and you don't know how to deal with it," he corrected bluntly, hardening himself not to feel a bit of regret as a look of pain flickered across those expressive eyes he had come to love so much.
She seemed to wilt in front of him; her shoulders drooped, her grimly set features relaxed, and her arms sagged limply around her waist in a loose embrace. She lowered her chin, intent on studying the floor and wishing that it would swallow her up so she wouldn't have to have this conversation with him. God, he was so…angry. She couldn't remember the last time he had been this angry with her.
"So go ahead, Elizabeth," he whispered. "Run away. Leave. After all, you are your parents' daughter."
Oooh, there was that tug-of-war game again. Elizabeth's chin snapped up, her eyes blazing, as she landed one small fist square in his gut. The blow didn't hurt Jason at all – he wasn't even sympathetic enough to pretend that it did – but it sure as hell made her feel better.
"You smug bastard!" she seethed. "Who the hell do you think you are-"
"Who the hell do I think I am?" he repeated incredulously. "No, Elizabeth – who the hell do you think I am?" His strong hand slammed against the side of the door, curling around the frame so tightly that his knuckles turned white from a lack of circulation. "I didn't do anything wrong here – if anything, I'm being more open about this than you are."
She growled at his accusation but he blustered on before she could think of something to fling back at him.
"Yes, I understand we've been best friends for four years. But that's not a reason why we can't work." Jason's eyes were stern and stormy, and the older man seemed to have already given up hope of making her understand but for some reason that he couldn't explain kept trying. "It's more of a reason why we can."
She was watching him solemnly as he licked his lips. "Elizabeth, you've always been there for me every time I needed you, just like I hope I've always been there every time you've needed me."
"You have," she whispered before she could stop herself.
Jason backed away a step, into the hallway, and bowed his head. As if magnetically drawn with him, Elizabeth eased forward until she was leaning against the threshold of her door. The mobster was lost in intense thought, a bitter battle of his emotions, and after what seemed like forever, he looked back up at her.
"I'll be honest with you, Elizabeth. I want more." His words were low and gruff, spoken in that sandpapery voice that now made tingles run through her body. "And I think I'm in love with you."
She sucked in a quick breath, regarding him silently with wide, shocked eyes.
"I know why you're afraid," he continued softly. "You think that you have a way of pushing people away, that you ruin every relationship you start. And you don't want that to be us – you don't want to ruin our friendship. I get that."
He was close now, and she could smell his scent of cologne and leather. Jason's breath fanned her lips and brought a tremble to her limbs. "But I'm not going to keep being dishonest with you, Elizabeth. I want more. I want you. I wanted to kiss you for such a long time, and I don't regret it at all."
Her lips had parted in surprise and her chin was wobbling. Without warning, Jason snaked an arm around her waist and brought her body crashing forward into his. She couldn't even yelp with surprise – no sound escaped her lips – and Jason pushed her back toward the wall, pinning her there and bracing his hands on the wall on either side of her head.
His intense cerulean orbs probed hers and Jason dipped his head closer. "And now it's time for you to decide." She blinked up at him, her blue eyes wide and uncomprehending, looking almost afraid under the weight of his gaze. For the life of her, she couldn't figure out what he was saying – but it sounded suspiciously like an ultimatum.
I might give love to you
I might step right on through
"What do you want, Elizabeth? A friend-"
He leaned down further, closing the scant distance between them, and captured her soft lips with his for a searing kiss. Elizabeth's heart skipped two beats the instant his lips touched hers, the same, familiar, gentle caress from three days ago. But this kiss wasn't meant to be gentle. Jason's mouth was hot and fierce on hers, claiming her senses and refusing to relinquish them. Her blood hummed hot through her veins, roaring in her ears, when he fisted a hand in the silky chestnut locks at the nape of her neck and used the leverage to angle her head back. His tongue parted her lips and slithered into the warm, sweet recesses of her mouth, plundering it savagely. Elizabeth gasped into his mouth, meeting the harsh lashes of his tongue with her own and pulling him in deeper. Jason bit her lip then kissed away the sting, and Elizabeth felt herself instantly melt when he rocked his hips gently but firmly into hers, letting her feel exactly what he felt. And then, as if sensing that he'd do best to end it before it went too far, Jason pulled back and rested his forehead against hers as he sucked in much-needed oxygen. It took him a minute to compose himself, and when he had, he looked deep into her eyes with the same question burning in his.
"-Or a lover?"
And then he pulled back completely, purposely avoiding her eyes, and backed away. She watched him go with her mouth wide open, her lips swollen from his drugging kisses. He stumbled a step, then pivoted on his heel and walked slowly but resolutely toward the stairs around the corner. And then he disappeared from view altogether.
Jason's words were ringing in her head – a friend or a lover? Friend or lover? – and Elizabeth felt her knees go weak. Letting out a muffled whimper, she sank to the floor and hugged her knees to her chest, wondering just what the hell she was supposed to do.
Wondering, for the first time in a long time, what the hell she really wanted.
Johnny O'Brien was seated at the bar and enjoying his second frosty beer. It was midday and Jake's was sparsely populated, allowing him the rare luxury of enjoying his alcohol in peace. Jake was bustling around behind the counter busying herself with cleaning, and the older woman was feeling especially chatty today. Johnny smiled and nodded as he listened to her matronly voice, genuinely enjoying her company, when he heard some scuffling in the entranceway.
Elizabeth Webber, her hair tousled and mussed, her cheeks red from the cold, had just stumbled into Jake's in such a hurry that she stubbed her toe and almost went crashing to the floor. Having composed herself, she strode into the bar and immediately froze the second Johnny's surprised but amused green eyes landed on her.
The guard's lips curled into a smug, saucy smile, and even Jake smirked. Elizabeth's cheeks instantly flushed with warmth. They knew. They knew everything. And of course they would – word traveled like wildfire in their tiny, close-knit and chronically bored town.
The jukebox was blaring and Elizabeth braved another step forward, her eyes averted. She knew he was here. He lived here, so naturally, it would fit that he would be here. She shook her head briskly, not pleased that she even rambled on in her own head. Her blue eyes darted from the counter to the beer in Johnny's hand and the pool tables to her left, and Elizabeth asked herself for the millionth time what she was doing here.
Fear might keep me from it all
She edged closer, studiously avoiding both the bodyguard and the barkeeper, and Johnny had the decency to turn back to the bar. He and Jake shared a knowing grin, both understanding that whatever situation was at hand would be resolved soon. They had been sitting in the exact same spot half an hour ago when Jason had come bursting through the door, mad as hell and not willing to spare a word in explanation. He had stomped up to his room and slammed the door so hard that Jake could feel the shocks reverberate even on the floor below. And now Elizabeth was running in looking wonderfully flustered and scared as a Welsh rabbit – and all was good.
The brunette looked up apprehensively at the stairs that would inevitably lead to Jason's room, all the while praying that she knew what she was doing. She raised one thick-soled boot and placed it gingerly on the first step. With her heart thundering in her chest, she lifted the other foot and placed it on the second step, hoping that this would somehow get easier by maybe the fifth step. Maybe.
She was almost up to the little landing when she turned around and glanced at Johnny and Jake, both of whom had almost disappeared from view. They were laughing and talking, but they seemed so far away. Elizabeth looked up nervously at the darkened stairwell, willing herself to keep climbing.
I climb so high to see
But the ground just teases me
Her fingers curled into loose fists as she berated herself for being silly. She knew exactly what was waiting for her at the top of those stairs, and she had no reason to be afraid. In all the years she'd known him, she had never been afraid of Jason. Not once.
And she wasn't about to start now.
With renewed energy, she quickly darted up to the landing and the remaining steps to the top.
I think you'll be there when I fall
Her boots thundered on the wooden steps as Elizabeth raced upstairs. She tripped once and immediately reached out to grab the banister before continuing her reckless sprint to the top.
It should never have had to be hard.
When I fall
I fall
She was almost to the top. She could make out the dark green carpet that Jake refused to get rid of, the handsome wooden molding where the walls met the floor. Almost there.
Elation raced through her as she bounded off the last step to the second floor, continuing her sprint to the third door on the left. She had been there many times before but suddenly, it felt like her first.
Elizabeth was out of breath from exertion as well as excitement when her hand closed around the knob of his door. She grasped it firmly and flung it open without knocking.
When I fall
I'm amazed by it all
He was standing in the middle of the room with his back toward the door when she flung it open, and the unexpected sound made him pivot on his heel with surprise. He stood there staring at her as she stared back, both of them unable to believe for a moment that this was real. That she was here. That this was happening.
Elizabeth's eyes softened as soon as they fell on him, and try as she might she couldn't hold back the tears that suddenly blurred her vision. He was such a beautiful man – inside and most definitely outside. He had stood in her studio and poured his heart out to her, all the while understanding her fears and doing his best to allay them. After all, that was what he always did. And even though he had no idea what her reaction would be, he had been honest with her anyway.
She stood in the threshold, one hand around the knob and the other braced on the frame of the door as she just looked at him. The utter perfection of the scene brought a timid, watery smile to her lips.
Control is letting go
And I'm the last to know
He cleared his throat gruffly, not trusting either of them enough to get his hopes up, and Elizabeth blinked back her tears.
"Both," she whispered.
Jason's sandy brows furrowed. "What?"
"Both," she repeated. "I want both. A friend. A…l-lover. I want both. I want you, too, Jason."
We might land beyond the wall
The anxiety and tension in his body seemed to dissipate and float away in a matter of seconds, and Jason couldn't get to her fast enough. A few glassy tears tumbled from her lashes and shattered on her porcelain cheeks as Elizabeth fairly launched herself from where she stood and flew into his waiting arms.
I might give love to you
I might step right on through
Jason held her tightly, crushing her petite body against his hard frame. She fit perfectly against him, molding ideally to his body. She was soft everywhere he was hard, and he just couldn't get close enough. One hand claimed the small of her back possessively, anchoring her against him, and the other one fisted in her waves of chestnut silk.
She buried her face in the warm, dark cavern of his neck, clenching her fingers in the cranberry cotton of his shirt and burrowing into his chest. His scent – warm, spicy, ruggedly masculine – wrapped around her like a blanket and Elizabeth drank him in, savoring the moment.
So many moments had led to this one, she knew. So many mistakes, so many missteps, so many…moments. His cheek was pressed tightly to her temple, holding her close as if he was afraid that she'd run away again if he let go.
Elizabeth shifted in his embrace, releasing his shirt and bringing her hand up to cup his jaw. Jason murmured something into her palm but obliged by facing her. She gasped when he did, taken aback by the love and blatant desire swirling in the depths of his cerulean orbs.
She gently coaxed him closer, moving her hand slowly across his skin so that her fingers now speared through the short golden hair at his neck. Jason gazed down at her reverently, the look in her eyes like a soothing balm for the bitter conflict of emotions that had recently been waged inside him. He didn't need to hear her say the words; the thing that had always made their relationship so special was that sometimes, words just weren't needed.
Her breath tickled his lips and her small nose bumped against his. Jason wrapped both arms around her, twining his fingers at the small of her back and letting her take her time. He had spent the past half hour regretting how he'd treated her; the way he'd barged into her studio and flung around insults to deliberately bait and prick her, and the way he'd savagely kissed her and left her with an ultimatum. If she wanted to take her time right now, he wasn't about to refuse her.
Her lips caressed his softly, hesitantly, and Jason held his breath. Letting out a shaky sigh, Elizabeth sank deeper into his embrace and pressed her lips to his without the timidity that had accompanied the gesture previously. Jason kissed her back softly, not pressuring her, and she responded beautifully, like a closed flower slowly blossoming at the first warm rays of the sun.
Her nails scraped his scalp and Jason lowered his head, letting her assume control. Everything that he felt for her was mirrored in the kiss they shared – Elizabeth made sure of it. And from the way her lips probed his, the way her arms wrapped around him, the way she put her whole body and soul into that kiss – Jason knew. He knew that he wouldn't have to worry about her leaving. He knew that she had realized what she wanted. He knew she'd stick to it with the same commitment that he would.
He knew all that because sometimes, actions spoke louder than words. And other times, like now, the love and friendship they shared spoke the loudest of all.
I think you'll be there when I fall
The End.
