The Love Affair of Severus Snape
Disclaimer: I own nothing it all belongs to the amazing Mrs. Rowling. Luckily I do own Rayne…so yah.. she is mine! Moo-ha-ha…
A/N: I have been drabbling with this fic for some time now and this is my like my first chapter. I meant for there to be some mystery so if you are like good confused and want to know more about the mystery.. good. But if you are like .. what the fuck is this person talking about…then give me a review saying that and ill make it clearer! so yah.. without further a due… the love affair of Severus Snape.
" Five points from Gryffindor." Said Professor Snape.
He could not even bring himself to snarl or smirk or even assign detention to Potter for once again blowing up his cauldron. Thoughts of her screams kept ringing in his ear distracting him from the entire present. If he had been at all aware of his surroundings he would have saw the confused looks of the entire N.E.W.T.S potion, Snape never missed an opportunity to make Harry's life hell – usually without reason and he now had the perfect opportunity to assign the boy punishment and he allowed it to slip by? But all he could see when he looked around the room was her lying in the grass having her limbs being pulled apart by multiple Crusaders Curses, her blood being spilled all over the grass. He had been like this for two days, teaching his classes in a mute haze and becoming so inebriated at night that he fell asleep because he passed out from becoming so dizzy from the colors all around him.
Vaguely he heard the bell ringing and automatically commanded the dunderheads to leave his classroom. As soon as the dungeon doors slammed shut, signaling all the students should be walking along to the Great Hall for lunch, Severus sat behind his desk, put his head down on it and began to sob uncontrollable. At first it came in shallow gasps and as the memories flashing through his mind become more pronounced his ragged breaths turned into loud moans of desperation.
Four days ago if you had asked the Potions master the last time he cried he would have told you it was when he was eleven years old.
FLASHBACK
As he rounded the corner harsh cries began to come forth from his lips and he felt the hot tears welding up in his eyes. Why did McGonagall have to ask him that? How more embarrassing than to be held over in class by none other than his least favorite teacher, to then be question if his mother ever taught him how to properly bathe? Not only did she imply that she agreed with the 'slimy – greasy – haired git' names but she brought up his mother. He sat there trembling in anger as she mention her proposal of teaching him the art and usefulness of shampoo, but now as the memories of his mothers love pierced his heart the heated anger turned into heated sobs.
He began to run, faster and faster hoping against hope that he could out run the memories of her. How her lovely hands used to rub soap over his swollen body…how she sang him a lullaby as she worked. He loved when she gave him those warm baths as a child; she would take care of him after his father unmercifully beat the crap out of him. She would wipe all thee tears and bloody away and tell him that everything would be better in the morning and his father would be in better mood. She would say that he just had a "hard day at work" or "had a stressful meeting" and how "we needed to understand his need to vent on us."
I always believed her, her words seemed to be like an oversized magical eraser that would just erase away all the horrible things that his father caused. But now she was gone and McGonagall had to remind him of the kindness that she and always shown him…
Suddenly Severus relies that he had run directly outside and was just about to hit...
To late… blubbering crying Sinvellus Snape ran directly into Sirius Black, who proceeded to inform the entire school, that was currently outside, that Snape was crying. Needless to say this was when he earned the nickname "Sinvellus" and he vowed to never cry again.
ENDFLASHBACK
That was until two days ago when he had last seen her and since then he had broken down twice in front of people and eight times alone. How could he be endlessly tormented by unforgivable (s) and be able to perfectly function, but now allow one women to turn him into a blubbering fool. He could barely believe that he had only meet her at the beginning of the year, had only known her for less than six months and had already lost her. He could still fondly remember that first time that he met Rayne.
FLASHBACK
"Albus, some people don't have all day to wait around for some new DADA teacher who is obviously not dedicated to the job if he cannot even make it to an informal lunch on time.' Snapped Severus.
Albus had requested that the staff report to the Great Hall at 12:00 in order to meet the new teacher. It was now 12:22 and he was not here.
"No, no she still has 8 minuets to arrive. I am sure she will be here on time, Severus don't worry." Replies Albus.
Not only did this completely befuddle Severus but also it was said in one of Albus' infuriating calm and superior voices.
Before Severus could retort Minerva spoke up, Severus had sensed that she had been getting restless also. " Albus, I don't mean to be rude but what in heavens name do you mean she has eight more minuets, I thought you said…"
She was interrupted by Albus' raised right hand. "I do apologize deeply to all of you, but Rayne owled me this morning and informed me that she would be arriving at 12:30 and she hoped that it would not be an incontinence. Since I had already told everyone 12:00 and I did not know the precise location of the entire staff at the time I decided that we would make use of that time and explore socializing with each other, we do it so rarely anymore. I fear that we all tend to overwork and what an amazing opportunity to relax! As I said before I am sure that she will be arriving shortly."
No one dare question Albus after his lengthily explanation but it but a deep scowl on Severus' face, only Ablus could turn a useful working 30 minuets into a wasted socializing event and get away with it! As every second ticked by Severus became more annoyed with his current situation and when he was about to protest that Albus should at least feed them that Great Hall doors we burst open and in he stepped.
As Severus took a closer look he realized that he was a SHE, how could Ablus give his job away to a female who looked barely over 25? On a closer examination he realized that she was quite stunning. Wait have you gone fucking mad! She is not gorgeous she is steeling your job!
Her long brown hair fell beneath her neck sitting resting on her shoulder blades. It was a rich chocolate brown and completely straight. She looked quite short at least a foot shorter than him. Good she will have to look me up in the eyes! Always intimidating. As Albus directed her closer to the staff table, in the middle of the Great Hall, he noticed that her hair was BLUE? Yes, he was quite sure that she had strips of blue, red and violet hair intermixed with her natural chocolate brown. How childlike. I cannot believe that Albus would hire someone who did not even have a true hair color.
Any further inspection of her disposition or appearance would have to be postponed for she and Albus and finally reached the table and he was introducing her.
"I would like you to all meet Professor Hurst, our new DADA teacher. This is Minerva McGonagall, transfiguration teacher, Hagrid, the grown keeper…
As Albus began drowning on with the introductions Severus took the opportunity to place Miss Hurst under his careful watch.
Surprising she was not exhibiting the usually nervous habits that most of the new teachers tend to do, such as ringing the hands, slouching or biting their lower lip. All those habits irked Severus immensely, making the first reason for him to dislike the new teacher. But this one was standing perfectly still and straight, looking each Professor in the eye and making a curt bow of the head and a warm smile in each of their directions when Albus introduced them. One particular name drew him away from his wary inspection of Miss Hurst… his.
"…And lastly this is Severus Snape, the Potions Master here at Hogwarts." Finished Albus.
Positioning his lips into the perfect sneer and his eyes into a dark and threatening glare Severus 'greeted' the new Professor. He was excepting to receive a terrified and frightened look in response, but what he received honestly shocked him. She looked him dead in the eye and gave him the largest smirk (one that would rival Malfoy's) that he had ever seen. Also uncharacteristic to her other greetings she responded with words that dripped with sarcasm.
" What a pleasant experience to meet your acquaintance……Professor Snape."
Albus saved him from attempting to reply with another sarcastic comment by saying, " Now that we are all aquatinted shall the feast begin?" and with a clap of his warm hands a surplus of food appeared on the table.
ENDFLASHBACK
As real as his dream seemed in Severus' head he could not help but wonder why Ablus' clapping had seemed so pronounced…"bang, bang, BANG…"
As he came back into the realm of the living Severus concluded that there must be someone actually at his door., bloody hell he could not even have one moment alone anymore. Maybe if he wished hard enough the banging would just stop! After a few more seconds of this attempt to wish the noise away Severusaccepted defeat and with a gruff nod he replied, " GO AWAY… you should be digesting food at this minute not bothering me!"
A soft but commanding voice came from behind the door ""Severus, please open this door.. I need to speak with you about your current emotional state."
If it had been any one else's voice that fluttered to Severus' ears other than Albus' he would have continued to dismiss them, but he accepted defeat. And with a wave of his hand he thrusts open the previously closed doors.
Not removing is head from the table Severus barked, " What do you want. I would personally prefer to be left alone and to wallow in self pity!"
"Ah, if you were wallowing in self pity alone I would not be here, Severus. But your uncharacteristic behavior has everyone confused and annoyed."
His anger forced Severus form his depressed state, " Firstly, the last time I checked you were mad at me for keeping all my emotions inside me and was griping at me to let someone in."
The longer he spoke the fiercer his words grew. "Also I am well aware the entire staff and order members, excluding you, are not talking to me. Just merely glaring at me every chance they get." By this point Severus was nearly shouting at Albus. " So why in the fuck do I care if I have everyone confused and annoyed?" Now Severus was completely yelling at Albus and banging his fist on his desk to emphasize certain points. " Do they really think that I am that much of a monster? That I have no heart at all? That I just sat there watching the best thing that has every happened to me be destroyed?" Now Severus was sobbing again. "Hun Albus…what do you think? Since you seem to e the only one to care about me anymore." And as a side note to himself he added. "Not that many people really did in the first place."
By this point Severus was not really forming audible words just merely bawling and Albus took this as a good time to come over and rap his in a loving embrace and sooth his with comforting words.
" I know my dear boy,
I suspected that you had something to do with her ability to escape.
You were merely playing the role of the double agent. Witch I fear
has consumed you all too much…
now taking his chin and bringing
it up to his eyes Albus continued. " But Severus, you need to tell
them, the order, that you saved her…that you were just doing your
job…"
Severus had been very allowing of Albus touching him but at this suggestion he immediately jerked away. "NO" he screamed! "SHE CANNOT KNOW" Severus was totally hysterical ". IF SHE THINKS THAT I TRIED TO KILL HER SHE WILL STAY AWAY.. FROM ME AND THEY CANNOT GET HER! SHE WILL BE SAFE IF THE DEATH EATERS CANNOT USE ME TO GET TO HER!
After Albus grabbed Severus' arms and pined them to his side he calmed down. And in ragged breaths Severus sobbed out." Albus… please, let them hate me as long as she is safe… that is all that matters to me… as long as she is alive…"
With a deep sign Albus replied, " My dear boy, I will honor your request if you do me one favor."
Severus' argent nodding prodded Albus to continue. " Return to your normal self. As much as I hate telling you this…burry all these feelings deep inside, like you are so good at doing. Go back to your normally way of coping with the hell that you live, pretend that it does not bother you."
Releasing Severus arms Albus somberly retreated from the room.
