Note:
I think this is a prequel to 'The Donutters'. It didn't start that way but that seems to be how it's ended up. I hope no one is offended by any characters in this story. It is purely for enjoyment and not intended to cast nasturtiums at anyone.Orchestral version of Rescue Rangers theme tune starts, scored to march time.
Rangers of the Lost Car-park – Part 1
It was a lush jungle scene, succulents reaching up and lianas reaching down from trees. There was a gap through which a limpid pool was visible, with a many-threaded waterfall splashing down into it from a rocky cliff. The Rescue Rangers were hiking towards it, with Monterey Jack leading, slashing his way through the undergrowth with a paring knife, and Zipper sitting on his shoulder like a parrot. Dale was right up with him and on all fours, apparently following a scent, which meant the pith helmet he wore frequently slipped down over his ears. Gadget followed, and Chip bringing up the rear, acting as eyes behind.
As Monty chopped away an obscuring leaf, the waterfall became clearly visible, and the sign above it. 'Mega-Mall Jungle Food Court', '19:36'. The digital clock changed to 19:37 as they looked on. Now the general layout was clearer, a large three story area with balconies and tables and chairs on each level. Planters on the edge of each balcony continued the tropical theme with hanging plants and palms, and the escalator railings were cladded with polished bamboo. Dozens of closed food outlets dotted the walls of the lowest level. The centre-piece was the tropical garden with the one story waterfall. The whole place was dimly lit, as only a few of the lights on the domed glass ceiling were active.
Monty held up a paw in a 'halt' signal as they came out alongside the pool. "Alroight, mates, this is the place those thieving grasshopper mice musta came to." Zipper buzzed his agreement.
Dale looked up and around. "Yup. The smell of day old junk food is strong here. But it doesn't go any further."
"Golly, it's really nice here. Peaceful." Gadget added.
Chip, his voice low, stated, "It'll get un-peaceful quick, if they figure out we're here and trying to take back their 'god'."
Gadget looked up at the digital clock. "Well, we only have 1 hour and 23 minutes, 42 seconds, minus the time it just took me to say that… well of course I said more than 'that'… but scratch that. If the Digi-pet doesn't get fed by then it will expire. And that poor kid is so attached to it..."
"So the question is, where did they stash it?" Chip was prowling around the green verge, looking for clues. The fake plastic grass didn't take footprints, so there was no way of telling which way they had gone. The grass went up to the waterfall, and down to where the pool ended in rocks. He looked into the churning water at the base of the falls, hoping it would give some clue… It did. The foaming water underneath didn't churn outwards as expected. He plucked a blade of plastic grass and tossed it in to the falls to confirm his hypothesis.
"Look guys! The grass disappears under the waterfall. I'm betting there's some kind of gap behind it."
"Probably a channel leading to the pump intake for the waterfall." mused Gadget.
Chip tied the free end of his grappling line around his waist. "Only one way to find out…" He handed the coil to Monty, and moved into the waterfall along a ledge. After a few seconds they heard, "It's okay, there's a path."
Behind the waterfall it was almost dark, but waxed match torches soon took care of that. The interior of the tunnel was two-foot square, and made of brick, the 'rock' exterior having obviously being moulded out of concrete. It was half flooded with water, an overflow from the pool. Along one edge of the channel, a gantry of straws, drinking straws to be precise, had been constructed, and the brick wall beside it was decorated with inscriptions and pictographs in reds and whites and yellows and dark browns.
Dale examined them, leaning out from the path. "Wowie zowie! Real hieroglyphics, and lower-aglyphics too! Dried ketchup..." he sniffed, "French Mustard, Mayo and soy sauce!"
"Golly, it must be their entire history," said Gadget, holding up her torch to illuminate it.
"Well one wrong move Gadget-luv, and we'll be history." Monty said, pointing over the side of the narrow drinking straw gantry to the fast flowing waters below, which flowed into the unknown up ahead. "We fall in there and we'll be goners."
"Aw C'mon Monty, I'm just interested. I always wanted to know what they mean in those late, late shows by 'historical sauces.'" Dale explained, but stopped leaning out.
"Enough goofing off!" Chip stated, still leading the way, checking ahead of him each step.
The tunnel opened out into a bigger chamber, almost a room. As far as their limited light sources could show, pumping gear and sealed electronics sat on a metal grid platform on the far side, and there was the suggestion of a human sized access panel behind it, though no handle or lever for it. Water filled the bottom of the room; the level being about a foot lower than the bottom of the channel they'd come through, so the foot deep water of the channel cascaded into it.
The straw gantry extended in a bridge spanning several feet of open space, and clearly designed for grasshopper mice, less than half the size of Gadget. It led to a barely visible central vertical pipe, presumably sucking in the water from below. It had a thick bundle of control cabling running up the outside, forming a path that was slippery with condensation, but climbable.
They carefully made their way across the bridge, spread out to distribute the weight, except for Zipper. He buzzed away into the darkness at the far end of the room and after a few seconds the place was illuminated by a couple of halogen bulbs as he found a switch by the access panel. Now they could see that up in the roof, there was a hole about 6 inches square, offset diagonally from where the big pipe entered, and another drinking straw bridge leading across to it.
Chip was inspecting every inch of the bridge as he climbed across it. "Careful... There could be traps."
Dale bounced on ahead, bypassing the chipmunk in the fedora. "Aw, C'mon Chip, that sorta thing only happens in movieeeeeees!" The last section of bridge opened underneath him like a trapdoor, dropping him through.
"Dale!" yelled Chip, then bounded forward, diving after him. He caught Dale's shoulders a fraction of a second before he plunged into the cold water, and was sucked down into the undertow around the pipe. Monty set himself and pulled on the line that was still attached to Chip, stopping their fall. Gadget and Zipper caught hold of the back end of the thread and helped haul the chipmunks back onto the bridge.
Chip said in annoyed tone. "I guess they watch the same movies, lame-brain! Next time you may not be so lucky. "
A couple of seconds work from Gadget and Zipper and the trapdoor was disabled. They made their way up the spiral and across the second bridge without further incident. They entered the hole in the roof, which turned out to be a steep tunnel leading upwards. He held his torch aloft. It was covered in more symbols, some of them based on human warning signs for hazards and shocks.
"Wonder what this place is was built for... whoa!" He pointed down at where the floor turned from brick to fragments of dark tile. He got down and firked up a section to reveal hard packed sand underneath. He looked along the line of the floor. "Gadget, what do you make of this?"
Gadget got down beside him and ran her hand over the sand. "Well, considering how the sand is packed, and the consistency of the grains, I could make a sand castle, if we removed the tile…"
"That's not what I meant. This looks like it could conceal traps."
She dug down with a paw. "Hmm... there is enough depth for mouse traps." She stuck her torch in the sand and looked along the surface as Chip had done. "Yes, see those slight bumps? I bet they're triggers. Not a problem, as long as you don't put pressure on them."
They chalk marked around each bump, and navigated across the mouse traps. Beyond, the tunnel opened out into a foot square chamber with a metal roof, another access hatch. On the far wall was a large pipe mouth that looked decidedly sinister. Scattered around the chamber were dozens of bits and pieces, mechanical toys and plastic models that had come with kiddie meals, all displayed as part of some primitive potlatch art collection. And in the place of honour, on top of a large plastic electrical housing sat the object they were looking for, the Digi-pet.
It was a golden plastic box about an inch and a half square, and the fox-squirrel creature on the LCD screen was making a whining noise. Chip stepped up to it, reaching out. "Looks like we got here just in time…"
Gadget squeaked, "NO!" and Chip stopped, wincing. The mouse engineer continued, "Golly, I'm sorry, but moving it might have caused certain problems."
"What kinda problems, Gadget-luv?" Monty asked, a fraction of a second before the others.
"Well, with breathing for example, then there would be the falling from a great height and going splat into the iron grid on the machine level, if I have the angle of descent calculated correctly. You see, they placed the Digi-pet box on the manual release switch for the reservoir that feeds the waterfall. That's what this tunnel is, the drain for the tank. Unfortunately, they pushed in the switch and it latched. Remember the cheese trap back at my bomber? Same idea. Release the pressure, it will pop out and open the valve." She pointed at the pipe.
Chip nodded. "I see. So we need to keep pressure on it until we replace the Digi-pet with something else that weighs the same."
Dale piped up, "Neato! This is just like the temple scene in 'Louisianna James and the Idol of Babylon.'"
"More or less." Chip looked around, "Okay, we'll gather stuff from around here. Gadget, figure out how to put it together." He untied his line and started helping put things in a pile.
In moments they had a big bundle of things tied with string. Monty hefted it, while Dale had his arms around the Digi-pet. Chip had his paws on the switch, ready to keep the pressure on.
"Okay… on three… one, two, three!" Dale whisked the Digi-pet away as Monty slid the bundle on. Chip waited a second, then carefully pulled his paws away. He sighed with relief as the switch stayed where it was.
Dale pressed the 'feed' and 'cuddle' buttons on the device and the pet perked up momentarily. But then a battery low indicator lit up. "Uh oh… Gadget? There's something wrong…"
Gadget gave it a quick once over. "Gosh, water must have seeped into the battery compartment when they brought it through the waterfall. I can find a replacement battery, and change it without loosing power, but only once we're back at my workshop."
"Great, then let's get outta here!" Chip exclaimed. "I don't like the fact that a balanced weight is all that stands between us and watery doom…" He lead the way out of the chamber and back down the passage.
"Oh, I used a knot of my own invention to secure it. It should hold together indefinitely, with no problems…" Gadget said brightly.
There was a massed panicked expression from the rest of the Rangers as there was a creaking noise from behind them. Gadget continued. "Of course, I had to use what string I could find, and I'm not entirely sure it was the best quality."
This statement was followed by a disconcerting snap. "Run!" Chip yelled, suiting actions to words. They headed down the tunnel at a run, hopping the marked out traps. Well everyone except Dale, who was carrying the digi-pet strapped to his back. Being in last place he pelted straight through, setting off the traps behind him.
Water started flowing under their feet, and the gurgling sound from behind warned of more to come. Chip saw up ahead that the water had pushed the bridge end free of the hole, leaving a big gap between them and the central pipe. "Uhoh… Grab on guys!" He pulled out his grappling line and let out the free end to the Rangers. He popped open the bobby pin hook, sighted on the pipe, ahead and off to one side, and cast his line.
The main flow of water came down the tunnel, shooting out to pour in a waterfall onto the grid below. Fortunately Dale running into the others had pushed the Rangers out into midair, and since they were holding Chip's line, they swung away around the main pipe, avoiding the high pressure jet of water that would certainly have wrecked the difgi-pet, and possibly them. The line coiled round it like a ribbon round a maypole, depositing them safely on the spiral of cable around the pipe. Zipper flew up alongside Monty, and landed on his shoulder, buzzing a sigh of relief.
It was momentary. The grip of the grapple was none too secure and this was just enough weight to free it. They started sliding down the pipe like a helter skelter. They slid all the way down, and scooted across the lower bridge before they could overload the trapdoor. They skidded to a stop about half way across, and their combined weight caused the bridge to bow alarmingly.
Gadget said, "Don't worry guys! I have the perfect answer to this problem." She dropped something over the side just before the bridge came adrift. They dropped onto a just inflated raft made from a hot water bottle. It even had a Rescue Ranger logo on it.
Chip patted the raft underneath him and shook his head. "How do you carry something like this around?" He asked Gadget.
"Practice!" she replied brightly, tying together the remains of a bridge section as paddles. They paddled their way across to the channel, which was still cascading water into the main chamber. "Don't worry, the water levels will equalise, and then we can float out." she said.
"I'd prefer not to wait that long." Chip said, "When the waterfall outside stops, it'll get noticed."
"Too late, Chippah!" exclaimed Monty, pointing at the broken off end of the bridge. There stood a dozen grasshopper mice, clad in bright paper towel kirtles and split drinking straw head-dresses. They also carried a number of weighted toothpick spears and wickedly sharpened spork boomerangs.
Dale yelled, "I know what to do!" and held the digi-pet aloft. At this the grasshopper mouse started shaking their spears and yelling in infuriated voices.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" yelled Chip.
"Well, I thought they'd all bow down and worship it, like in 'Idol of Babylon'."
"Gadget, if you have a fast getaway mode on this thing, now would be the time to use it!" Chip said rapidly. Then he remembered the way Monty's dad had done it.. "One that doesn't involve sinking and half drowning that is."
"Can do! I made some improvements." She pulled a string, and holes opened in the underside and stopper. Water hit the super concentrated baking soda in the cavities, and the bottle jumped into the air like a hovercraft and zipped forward over the lip of the channel, getting out of the way just as the grasshopper mice stopped waving spears and started throwing them. "I call it the hover-raft."
They shot down the channel, which was lined with more of the tribe. Fortunately at first the hover-raft was mostly above their level, and both spear and boomerang simply stuck into the underside, or bounced off. But as they reached the entrance and the dying waterfall, the vertical thrust exhausted itself and the hover-raft flumped into the water, though still going at a rate of knots.
Zipper took off with a bugle call, and buzzed the tribes-mice along the bank, distracting some of them. This was a particularly brave act as insects were their primary food source. But he evaded thrusting spear and sweeping spork with equal dexterity. Gadget launched a couple of net plungers from her crossbow in support, and Monty swept a group into the water with a well placed paddle. Chip and Dale guided the boat. Chip stated, "At the far end, hide the digi-pet and head for the Rangerwing. I'll distract them. Swing by and pick me up."
"But Chip…!" Dale disagreed.
"No time…" They bumped against the far end and the raft flipped forward, dropping them onto the edge of the diorama. They bounded off and onto the floor, Chip one way, the other Rangers the other. He ripped a section from a discarded Burger Knight carton en passant and folded it so the yellow lettering was visible. Then he headed at full speed towards the nearest soda counter, holding the cardboard so it was just visible from behind.
A swarm of tribes-mice appeared at the edge of the jungle, shouting and gesticulating. They ignored the larger group and started hurling more spears at Chip, who by this time had enough of a lead that they all fell short. They swarmed after him, but by this time Chip was at the base of the counter, and going up it as if jet propelled, with the aid of his trusty bobby pin grapnel.
Chip hauled himself over the top and saw what he'd hoped for. He jumped up and switched on the machine. A few of the tribes-mice had been flung ahead on catapult driven card gliders, but only one was flung high enough to glide all the way to the counter. He jumped down, screaming a battle-cry and brandishing twin spork kukris with which he started a dazzling display of blindingly fast moves which would quail the most skilled combatant.
Chip didn't seem daunted. Maybe the pistol style drinks dispenser he was shouldering like a rocket launcher had something to do with it. Goosh! The tribes-mouse was flung off the counter on a spray of vanilla milkshake, to land on the padding of a nearby seat. Chip stepped up to the edge of the counter to overlook the main body of tribes-mice, spread out between the counter and diorama. The nearest were doused as Chip waved the stream back and forth, knocking down any mouse who managed to get back up.
Another glider threatened to over-fly and was quickly diverted with a spray of milky goodness. But others were rising, and some of the tribes-mice had reached the base of the counter. A half dozen heroes reached the counter top, and Chip started them down as he targeted them with the nozzle and fired. It produced a feeble little stream that reached only halfway to him before hitting the counter. Chip gave a cheesy grin and shrug, and dropped the drink dispenser. He kicked up the pair of spork kukris left by the first attacker into his paws, and hoped he could keep them off him for long enough.
'Long enough' turned out to be about two seconds. There was a sudden blaze of light from behind him as the Rangerwing rose up from behind the counter. "C'mon, Chip-lad!" yelled Monty from the co-pilot's position as it zoomed overhead, trailing a matchstick rope ladder. Chip dropped the kukris and grabbed on as it rose away, spears and boomerangs trailing. One boomerang clipped the rope ladder near the top, but that was the nearest anything came.
"Is everything alright?" he called as he started to climb up.
Dale was the one at the top of the ladder. "Well, we gotta get the digi-pet to Gadget's workshop as fast as possible, but every thing else is fine… Chip, sorry about the whole 'idol' thing…"
Chip was feeling slightly guilty about how he'd reacted, especially as Dale was apologising. It wasn't long in the past that he'd sworn to be a better leader. Dale was seeing Foxglove regularly, and Chip spending time in Gadget's workshop, learning more about mechanisms, and the amazing mouse who built them. One of their major points of conflict was slowly disintegrating, and both of them seemed the better for it. That didn't mean Dale didn't goof up occasionally, or Chip get didn't annoyed, as witness the incident on the bridge, but it was less likely to turn into a furball.
"Forget it, Dale. I might have tried it if I'd thought of it."
Gadget pulled down her goggles and called out, "We're heading out, and it's kind of windy, so hold onto your hats, well at least Chip and Monty should, because they have hats… Here we go!"
They were heading straight for one of the automatic doors. Gadget pressed a button on the dashboard, and the front flashlight went red and flickered, illuminating the infrared sensor at the top. It overrode the lock, opening the door just as the Rangerwing side-slipped down, to fly through on it's side.
The weather outside was dreadful. Towering clouds scudded across the darkening sky, and chilling winds sliced across the car park outside. The Rangerwing bucked and heeled, and it was all Chip could do to hold onto the ladder, let alone climb. Gadget brought the Rangerwing round to head towards the park, flying over a car park that was still under construction. She went lower to use the piles of sand and temporary buildings as cover, or at least that was the idea. However the winds didn't get any less violent, just more unpredictable.
One particularly violent updraft tossed the Rangerwing up like a paper bag, then dropped it like a rock, straining a rope ladder cable that was already weakened by the boomerang strike. It parted, letting one side of the ladder drop and weakening Chip's hold. Another errant gust finished the job, cracking the ladder like a whip and flipping him free to fall a couple of feet onto a sand pile. He tumbled down it, ending up half buried at the bottom.
"Ohmigosh! Chip!" yelled Dale. "Gadget! Monty! He's down and we gotta get down there too!"
The sand had cushioned the fall so Chip was unharmed, apart from sand in a few places he didn't want to talk about. He pulled himself to his feet as the Rangerwing swept round, and went to hover, or tried to. It was pitching and yawing so much, it was a wonder they weren't seasick. He thought quickly, and picked up a half buried scrap of paper, rolling it into a megaphone.
"What're you doing?" he yelled.
"We're coming down to pick you up mate!" replied Monty, who didn't need any vocal aid.
Chip shook his head and hollered. "No! You try landing in this crosswind and terrain, you'll tumble or crash! Get back to HQ and fix the digi-pet, or the mission's a failure. I'll be alright, I'll get round to the sign of the orange section car-park. You can come back for me when you're done."
For a moment, it looked like Gadget and Monty were going to try anyway, but a vicious eddy punctuated his last sentence, and they barely maintained control. As they ascended and switched to forward flight Monty called out.
"Alroight Chippah! We'll hop back here like a kangaroo with a dingo on it's tail! Zippah will stay with ya!"
Something dropped from the Rangerwing. It was Zipper, holding onto a large nut to stop from being blown away. As he got near the ground, he released it and zipped over into Chip's arms. He gave a little fanfare.
"Thanks, Zipper." Chip said, closing his jacket tight against the wind, and carrying the heroic fly nestled in the crook of one arm, sheltered from the worst of it. They made their way across the dunes, past monoliths of breeze blocks, heading back towards the brooding bulk of the mega-mall, outlined against the twilight evening sky.
They crossed a ridge between two high piles of sand, dotted with gravel and debris from the construction work. As they moved around a stuck up off cut of wood, the humming sound of an electric motor was heard. "I told them not to risk…" Chip stopped. This wasn't the twin hum of the Rangerwing's engines, this was a deeper, single purr, like a remote control car...
They couldn't quite believe what they saw next. A female mouse or small rat (it was hard to tell with the only illumination being the last light of sunset and the exterior lights of the mall) came into view round the side of the pile. She was running and looked exhausted, and with good reason. Following her a few seconds later was a scale model APC. It's spotlight slashed out and speared her.
A loudspeaker cried, "Atchung! Halten!" and it raced up, stopping inches away from her. A trio of hamsters, wearing forage caps and military style jackets, jumped out of the back and ran round to surround her. A fourth hamster with a peaked cap, in what had to be the drivers position, popped open an overhead hatch and stood up, covering her with some sort of spring loaded, but still effective looking scale pellet rifle.
The trio quickly tackled the female, restraining her. They brought her, though not without a struggle, to the driver, who was clearly in charge.
"So you thought you could eschcape, and take der secret vit you, fraulein? Vell, you thought wrong. Nothink will stop the plan of our glorious leader! You vill give it to us, or face der penalty." With that he raised the rifle to sight right between her eyes.
Ominous music – Station break!
Even while the hamster was speaking, Chip was acting. A glance to Zipper, and a pointed paw sent the fly towards the guy with the rifle. Chip himself scooped up two pieces of the pea gravel that was mixed with the sand, and stepped behind the piece of wood. A single kick brought it down, and he jumped on, hurling the first stone at the end of the rifle to knock it aside just as the hamster brought it to bear.
The startled hamster fired, and the pellet went zinging off into the darkness. Then he was beset by a small but violent buzzing hurricane as Zipper arrived with his flying fly fists of fury. The three guards holding the prisoner were hard pressed to see what was happening with the search light turned towards them. The one at the back never knew what hit him. Chip did, because he'd thrown it.
The one nearest to Chip finally looked towards him, but too late. Chip was sliding down the sand pile like a snowboarder, and flew off a minor outcropping to send his improvised sled right into the goons head. This hapless hamster hoodlum quickly discovered the 'Plank Constant', to wit, that when someone smacks you upside the noggin with a chunk of wood, you fall over in an unconscious heap.
The captive rat realised she had a chance to break free and took it, wrenching her arm away from the grip of the last guard, who turned to face the bigger threat, though Chip was a head shorter than either him or the escapee. Chip had picked up the plank and swung it, only to be intercepted by the hamster, who laid hold of the other end.
Chip responded first, letting go of his end and dropping underneath it. He shoved up with a paw, and the board flipped up like a fold away ironing board. It hit the bigger creature right between the eyes, and he fell over backwards to join his mates in sleepy land. With his opponents disabled, Chip looked to the APC, where Zipper was doing his favourite 'boot to the head' routine.
Already the hamster had his eyes closed against Zipper's strikes and was flailing away with the gun butt with as much enthusiasm as he lacked accuracy. Zipper actually caught the end of the weapon as it reached the end of one of it's swings and rode it like a bronco, waving an arm and buzzing a 'Yehaw!'.
When one particularly wild flail made the guy lean further than usual, Zipper hauled with all his strength and the leverage of the gun. He tipped the goon out of his cupola and onto the ground, dropping the released gun on his head to knock him out. He buzzed overhead, using 'mysterious fly senses' to check they were out of it, and would stay that way for some time.
He buzzed back to Chip, smirking and clasping his hands together over his head. The wind had died down, and it was quiet and still. The girl had disappeared.
"Nice move Zipper! Are they all good and out?"
"Zure are! Zo zwho were zoze guyz?"
Chip dropped down to examine one in the full glare of the search lights more closely. The uniform tunic was brown, with a red arm band which carried a circular insignia, a white circle with a face on it. "Huh? This is cuh-razy! Henrich von Sugarbottom? What has he got to do with them…"
Zipper gave a buzz of warning, and Chip looked up to see the girl rat dart in and grab the plank, moving backwards to hold it like a club. She was facing him, and looked as if she wasn't sure whether to strike, run or do the can-can. He moved back out of the way, circling the ex- captive until the searchlight illuminated her quite clearly.
She was about Monty's height, or a head taller than Chip, with glossy black fur and small pointed ears. Her eyes were equally dark, and her muzzle was quite short, with delicate white whiskers and a pink nose. She had loose, shoulder length headfur, that was a shade lighter than the rest of her body. She wore a torn green jumper and brown skirt.
She called out suspiciously. "Who are you working for? Why did you attack them?" She had a trace of English accent.
"Well, that guy was about to shoot you, and I figured you might not like that too much. And I don't work for anyone, I work with the Rescue Rangers, and so does my friend." He pointed to Zipper. "My names Chip, and this is Zipper."
The girl lowered her guard slightly, looking puzzled. "The Rescue Rangers? I've think I've heard of them from a bat that lives over at the University… but what were you doing out here, and where are the others? I know there's five of you…"
Chip sighed. "You know Foxglove?" From her reaction it was clear she did. "We were on a mission at the Mega-mall, and they had to leave me behind for a couple of hours." He outlined the main points of what had happened. He continued, hands up, posture neutral.
"Look, it's clear you don't trust me. If you feel that nervous, then turn and go. Zipper and I won't follow. Or you can put down the wood and maybe we can help. After all, that's what the Rescue Rangers do." "Zyeah!"
The girl rat hesitated a moment, clearly debating with herself. Then she shifted the piece of wood onto her shoulder like a rifle at port. "Alright, but let's get away from here. I don't want to be around when they wake up, or if any more of Sugarbottom's Choc troopers show up."
"I knew I recognised that fat phiz of his!" Chip exclaimed, causing the girl to start.
"How do you know about him anyway?" She asked, suspicion still clear in her voice.
"Oh, the Rangers have tangled with that chocolate fruitcake before! Last time it was down in South America, where he was using mosquitoes to deliver ancient Aztec zombie drugs to unsuspecting creatures, and using them to harvest cocoa trees." He caught the leader by the shoulders and dragged him round to the back.
"What're you doing?" the girl asked, surprised.
"Moving them inside. They're exposed out here and there might be predators about." He looked around the inside, two benches along the side and a separate compartment for the driver. It looked like an Action Guy Bad Guyz (TM) troop carrier, a fairly common model of dual control (internal and remote) toy.
Chip briefly wondered what vibe made humans outfit models with internal controls that the dolls they were built for didn't need, but as always, accepted it as a fact of life. The hamsters had apparently added some touches of their own, a rack with some pole arms and rifles, and an electric fire starter which had apparently been juiced up into the rodent equivalent of a cattle prod.
He moved the last one inside, flicked off the searchlight from the drivers cabin and got out of the back, closing the fold down door/ramp behind him, and wedging it with the plank. Zipper popped up from inside the drivers compartment, having jammed the connecting door. They'd be found eventually, but if they came to quickly, they wouldn't be able to do much.
"But we could use that RC!" the girl said, glancing about and shuddering. "Let's get out of here!" She discarded the plank and picked up the rifle, examining it.
"Too conspicuous. We'll be less obvious on paws." As his eyes adjusted to the lower light levels, he asked, "What else does Sugarbottom have moving around?"
With only the distant mall lights, the girl rat was just a shadow. "I saw more of those, some trucks, and a few jeeps. He's got diggers and a couple of tanks, but…"
"They're not likely to be used for a search. No bats, or aircraft?" He saw her shake her head, slightly uncertainly. He nodded and said in a reassuring tone. "Well, it's not likely. So, what's the chocolate nut up to this time? Nothing good, I'm guessing."
She tensed when he said that, which was puzzling, but replied, "You guess right. As to what's going on… it's kind of complicated. Though it's funny you should mention nuts…"
He started walking off in the direction of the rendezvous, then thought better of it and picked up a leaf that he swept along behind, covering their tracks in the windblown sand.
He glanced up at the stars visible between the now, more scattered, clouds. "C'mon, this way. Feel free to explain as we go, starting with who you are. Everything above the rim of my fedora is all ears." he said lightly.
That got a slight smile. She walked alongside him, but slightly behind, while Zipper flew overhead.
"My name is Marion Ravenfur. As for what that leiderhosen lunatic is after, it's the resting place of the last and greatest invention of Mr Willy Wonti. In short, he's after the Ark of the Chocolate Covered Nut."
Chip looked puzzled. "How is that so valuable? I can get a bag of chocolate covered nuts from any corner store."
"Not like this one." She paused. "His last invention, the one he didn't release, was a new flavor of chocolate. My grandfather was his lab rat, which is how I got involved."
"I've heard of him. Dale, the resident chocoholic on our team, talked about Wonti a couple of times, said he was the greatest candy-maker who ever lived. But how could he come up with a new flavor? Chocolate is chocolate!"
That got a snicker. "What about, white chocolate, dark chocolate, orange chocolate, mint chocolate, caramel chocolate…" she ticked them off on her fingers. "Granddad was more than just a lab rat, he was Mr Wonti's friend those last years."
"Wonti was a Speaker, like Sugarbottom?"
"No, or at least, only with my grandfather. I'm not sure he heard words, but they understood each other. He came with Mr Wonti when he came from Britain. Granddad said Mr Wonti claimed this new flavour would be worth a mint, or possibly even a caramel to whoever got it. You see, he enjoyed pottering around in his lab, so he licensed his inventions out to the big chocolate firms rather than go into big business for himself. He was rich, but kind of eccentric towards the end."
"So he hid his last invention away for some reason?"
She nodded. "Apparently, he had a vault built somewhere around here, in one of the underground tunnels. This whole place was once small factories and warehouses, and his workshop was one of them. Now, of course, they're turning it into a new car park for the Mega-mall."
He asked, quietly. "Were you a part of this business?"
"Heavens no! I live over at the University trash dump. I'm an under-the-floor graduate student in Economics. I just come to visit him, make sure he's eating right. He stayed behind to look after Mr Wonti's place, even after the above ground part was gone…"
"So how did Sugarbutt become a part of it?"
"Apparently he was some sort of protégé of Mr Wonti and must have gotten wind of his discovery. According to my grandfather they were once friends, but Sugarbottom wanted more glory, and stole some of Wonti's ideas and presented them as his own. They never spoke again, and I'm sure Mr Wonti wouldn't have wanted Sugarbottom to have this secret."
"That doesn't explain the German soldier hamsters. They didn't act like regular Aztec zombies… Too mobile, and the shock didn't wake them. So the question is, how did he get them, and what are they doing?"
Marion shook her head, "I don't know about that. I came for my regular visit, and found my grandfathers new place looking like a bomb had hit it. Then a bunch of them swarmed me and dragged me to Sugarbottom's place, a shop in the Mega-mall. They put me in a cage next to my grandfather, and there I stayed until I escaped. Sugarbottom was going to use me to get my grandfather to co-operate."
She thought a moment. "I heard my grandfather talk about them being 'conditioned' some how. Sugarbottom don't want to risk trying it on him, because it might affect his memory, then there'd be no-one who could tell him how to …" There was an uncomfortable pause as she stopped herself.
Chip gave it a cushion. "I'm guessing there's some kind of map item showing the location. Your grandfather had it, only he knows how to read it, and you managed to bring it with you when you escaped. That's what that goon was asking about."
He heard a sigh. "Foxglove said the not so cute one was a top notch detective… Oh, I'm sorry!" She sounded worried. "I don't mean you're not cute, but…" She was getting good at making pauses uncomfortable.
Chip chuckled. "Foxglove views the world through Dale coloured glasses. I'm surprised she even notices me."
Zipper had been hovering along above them all this time, staying quiet as Chip questioned Marion. Now he saw moving lights over several intervening dunes, coming towards their position. He dropped down in front of Chip and buzzed out a warning. "Good work, Zipper!" the chipmunk crusader replied, looking around in the dim-lit car park. "Looks like more of the chocolate brownies are headed this way. We need to hide."
A stack of bricks over four feet high towered off to one side, and he started moving towards it. Marion took one look at it and exclaimed. "I'll never climb that!"
Chip grinned. "Perfect, then they'll never think of looking up there." He pulled out his trusty bobby pin grapple line, and hurled the end up to catch on the top edge. "Don't worry. You just tie yourself onto this rope, and I'll belay for you as you climb." He made a bowline cradle in the end, and swarmed up the brick wall using the rope. As a matter of fact, he could have done it unaided, but he wanted Marion to feel confident about using it.
Zipper helped the still uncertain lady rat into the loop at the end, and stayed with her as Chip helped pull her up, using his jacket as a cushion on the edge of the brick so the string wouldn't break. He pulled her over the edge just as a convoy pulled up at the base of the stack. Chip lay down at the edge and pulled a fragment of mirror out of his reclaimed jacket. He held it over the edge, angling it to act as a periscope while not reflecting any searchlights directed their way.
It was a big group, all vehicles from the Action Guy Bad Guyz range. A command car, patterned after a Kubelwagen jeep, was in the lead. It had two hamsters in the front seats, and a walkie talkie in place of the back seat. It was followed by an APC, and three half-track trucks with canvas covered load beds similar to US M3's, and another APC. The trucks proved to be full of hamsters in Choc Trooper uniforms.
"Halten!" Another hamster with a peaked cap stood up in the command car, and called out in a movie German accent. "Our orders are to comb dis section of der car park until ve recover der Ravenfur fraulein and the gob-stopper she carries. Ve must get it even if ve haff to kill her!"
Dutifully, groups of hamsters started hauling out combs from the backs of the trucks.
The driver in the command car spoke hesitantly. "Obersthamster, are you schure dis was vat our glorious leader vanted us to do?"
This got him a cuff. "Idioten! I am followink his orders eshactly!" He waved the others forward. "Schnell, schnell!"
Chip stifled a chuckle, and said quietly. "what a bunch of goobers! that's going to take them half the night." He sobered up. "but while they're down there, we're stuck up here."
Marion started to say something, then thought better of it. The wind was starting up again, and it was cold, even though it was almost summer. Chip looked around, their perch, which was a bare, two foot square surface of none too neatly stacked bricks. The only thing to break it up was a lunch box. The high wind earlier had tipped it over, and it lay on it's side with the lid open, exposing the remains of some worker's lunch.
Marion had trotted over to the shelter it provided, them picked a foot long satay stick out of the debris. It still had chunks of meat on it, and she pulled one off, nibbling daintily at it. When Chip looked at her, she shrugged. "They didn't feed me in there!"
Zipper hauled an apple core bigger than he was out of it, and gulped it with a satisfied sigh, and a complete disregard for normal physics.
Chip turned back to surveying the situation. The view was excellent. He could see over the stacks of sand and building supplies, all the way to the edges. Other lights told of other groups, and there were at least a dozen of them. "whoa! he's really going all out!"
The mega-mall had a few external security lights, which did more to define the black shape then actually illuminate it. But there was also a larger light, lower down, and open loading bay with movement inside. He pulled out a Gadget-made spy glass and started looking at it.
"That's sugarbottom's place!", exclaimed Marion, the last two words quieted by Zipper flying up in front of her, signaling to stay quiet. "we do not want to go there."
Chip rolled over and got up. "actually, we might. there's only a couple of hamsters and sugarbottom there, and they're in the loading bay. i bet he has everyone out looking for you. it would be the perfect time to sneak in and rescue your grandfather. what's the layout inside?"
"well… there's a big chocolate making room just behind the loading bay, with some smaller rooms off to one side, and I think the far wall door leads to the front store. The third room along is where he keeps his prisoners."
"there were more than just you?"
"oh yes, he's gathered up a lot of the locals to work at digging out the tunnels. he followed the instructions on the gob-stopper, but so far it just lead him to a dead end. that's why he's trying to get my grandfather to tell him what he's missed."
"that complicates things…"
"how can it complicate the impossible? not that I wouldn't like to help them escape, but if we go down, they'll spot us!"
Chip grinned, and held his hat in the air, feeling which way the breeze pushed it, which was in the direction of the mega mall. "i wasn't thinking of going down…"
He pulled a folded piece of paper and a stack of inch squares of duct tape from inside his jacket. Using the shelter of the lunch box, he unfolded the piece of paper to it's full A4 size, and started refolding it in a paper glider.
Marion took some seconds to realise what he was doing. "You have got to be joking!" Zipper shushed her again.
"it's okay, i've built these before… well, not exactly this design, but the principle is the same. i need that stick."
He said nothing about how that last attempt, just before their first case, worked out. Spending time with Gadget had given him a much better understanding of the principles of flight and he was sure he knew what had gone wrong the last time.
He took it and laid it along the keel, taping it in place with some of the duct tape. A second, gnawed off stick was set across the back as a cross brace. He tore hand holes in the paper of the keel, and sacrificed part of his grapple line to make two safety harnesses to hang from them, and a control cable that could warp the wings, passing from the tip of one wing, through the front hand hold and to the other tip.
At the end of it Chip had a two person hang glider, which caught the wind and almost blew away when he turned it upright. He spoke to Marion. "just get yourself in the rear harness, hold onto the handholds over your head, and run forward with me. and stay quiet, for both our lives."
She stepped back and exclaimed, "I'm not running anywhere, and certainly not in that! I'm a rat, not a bat!"
There were noises from below, and a clink, as something caught the edge of the bricks. Zipper shot to the edge, then back, buzzing with alarm.
"well it's either the glider, or rejoining the happy hamster brigade." Chip translated.
Reluctantly, she stepped forward, and set herself in the loops. On Chip's command they ran forward and straight off the edge of the bricks on the far side from the parked convoy. The rising wind caught them and lifted them away into the air, and Marion gave a stifled squeak. A few seconds later, a hamster in a choc trooper uniform and with a novelty key-fob torch and a comb strapped to his back, hauled himself over the edge.
&
Chip could maneouvre the glider by shifting his bodyweight, and moving the control cable back and forth for wing warping. Marion, behind him had her eyes closed and was holding her breath. Zipper, of course was riding on top. He brought it around until they were facing the mega-mall. The loading bay areas weren't actually in the main structure, but in a sort of annex with a lower roof that ran the length of the main one.
He heard Marion's voice from behind him. "If we die, I am going to kill you… Is it safe to look now?"
He had no need to whisper now. "Perfectly! The view is great!" Zipper added his endorsement.
He heard another squeak. "Ohmigosh! We're so high! I'll fall…"
"Will you cool it? You're perfectly safe in that harness, and it's not that high, can't be more than 50 feet. I've gone up thousands in the Rangerwing, and flown just about every type of aircraft."
"I don't want to know… Does that include paper airplanes?"
"Of course, and this one handles even better than I hoped. Look, we're almost at the roof of the loading bay, all I have to do is glide down. Easy!"
He heard a deep sigh, and Marion said, "You know, once you get past the terror, this is kind of fun… Should? Have you actually landed a paper airplane?"
Chip chuckled uneasily. "Well… not exactly… I mean it landed, and I landed, but not all at the same time… But I've landed everything else safely…"
Marion balled up in her harness with her eyes closed. "OhnononoImgontodiegontodie…"
Chip dipped the nose and sailed down to execute a perfect walkout landing with the rat still curled up in a ball behind him.
"We're down. The red zone is for the loading and unloading of passengers only."
"…gontodie…huh?" She opened one eye, then tentatively put down one foot, as if testing water before jumping in. "Amazing. I didn't even feel the bump."
"Told ya! Y'know, you should really switch to decaf!"
"Zoverhere guyz…" called Zipper. He was already at the edge where the roof of the loading bays met the mega-mall main building. He'd found a grill with warm air coming from it.
Chip untangled himself from the glider and came over. "Okay… A way in… you check for other ways out…" As Zipper buzzed off, Chip pulled out a section of disposable craft knife blade and scraped some of the dirt away from the holding screws, then stuck it crosswise in the grove on the top and turned. Slowly at first, it unscrewed, and the other three screws followed it.
"Have to make myself a better torch, and soon…" He muttered, as he peered into the stygian gloom. It looked like a horizontal shaft, with a number of grills opening down into lit rooms in the distance. "Hmm…"
Marion came up behind him. "How do you know this will get us to the prison room?"
"I don't. But I landed us right on top of Sugarbottom's loading bay, and this is about a quarter of the way along. It's our best shot…"
"So why are we waiting?" asked the girl rat.
"How many other animals were there in the prison?"
"Several dozen…"
"Darn! We need some way to get them all out." He went to the other edge and looked over.
Sugarbottom was standing right below, shouting at a bunch of hamsters in fancier versions of the brown uniforms, with gold foil coins as epaulettes.
"Ach! Can you sausage-heads do nothink right?"
The one with the biddest chocolate coins responded. "But glorious leader! We haff every choc trooper out searchink. Ve will find der fraulein."
"We haf no time! They are bulldozing and fillink in the old tunnels, and soon der Ark will be lost for efer. You are findink dat little rodent soon, or maybe I try out mine recipe for chocolate hamsters, hein?"
Chip looked around the rest of the bay and found nothing that pleased him. Stacks of boxes, an overhead winch, some powered trolleys…. big enough, but too slow. There were half a dozen choc trooper vehicles, hooked up to recharging units on a multi-way bar socket. Some of them were fully charged, if the green LEDs meant anything, however, getting to them would be almost impossible, and anyway, he was unlikely to find enough drivers to animal them from among the prisoners.
He came back, shaking his head. "We're not getting them out that way…"
Zipper flew back up, buzzing excitedly.
"That'd work!" Chip exclaimed.
Marion folded her arms. "And the translation for those of us who don't speak Fly?"
"There's a bunch of dumpsters at the far end overflowing with wastepaper and soft trash. If we can get them up here, they can jump down and get away."
"If we can get to them…" Marion said, uncertainly.
Chip forged on into the ventilation tunnel. The downwards facing grilles were, as he expected, ventilators leading into the well lit main room, filled with various pieces of cooking machinery and work tops. He stopped at one, and looked down with interest.
"What's up?" Marion asked.
Chip shook his head. "Maybe nothing." There were crude ladders and other additions to the manually operated machinery, jury rigged and hay wired, but clearly workable. It seemed that having failed with zombie labour, he was using small animal slave labour to run his enterprise. While Chip was no expert, all the machines looked both worn and archaic, or at least old, with mechanical dials and switches. The area was also deserted, with no guards, at least outside the doors, which was a relief.
A side vent, just beyond that, showed a darkened room, lit by a couple of nightlights. It had clearly been a storeroom, but now the metal shelving units had been converted into hamster dormitories, with rows of beds. But it was what was down in the centre that made Chip gasp.
"So that's how he did it…" Chip gasped, and Zipper buzzed agreement.
"Why do I get the feeling there's a circular that went round and I missed it?" Marion said. "It's just a bunch of old junk and a tape player. Why he'd put a cutout of his face in front of a spiral disk I don't know. Modern art?"
Chip shook his head. "One of our regular foes is a crime boss called Fat Cat. One of his scams was kidnapping and hypnotising sturgeon to lay eggs like chickens, so he could sell them to the rich cats uptown." When he heard a giggle from beside him, he said. "True story! Anyway, he used a gizmo that looked a lot like that."
Zipper had buzzed down through the grill, landed on the tape player, and turning down the volume, pressed Play. Sugarbottom's voice came from it.
"…You vill obey Heinrich von Sugarbottom as your glorious leader in all things. You vill vear chocolate coloured uniforms. And anudder thingk, you vill speak with a proper German accent, like mine own …"
Chip nodded. "Yeah, that sounds about right. It wears off after a couple of days, but I bet they're getting a refresher course every night. We found out later that the design came from this kooky 'How to make friends and hypnotise people' book published in the 70's, when there was a lot of interest in all things psychic."
He called Zipper back, continuing, "It sold a only few dozen copies, because it didn't work on humans. We figure the guy who wrote it tested it on animals, and assumed it would work on anyone. Fat Cat had a copy, and I guess it makes sense a hypnotism happy hoodlum like Sugarbottom would find one too."
Zipper popped back in through the grate, and they carried on. The second side grate was an office of sorts, combined with a bedroom, or at least there was an unmade camp bed in one corner. The desk was piled high with papers and lit by a desk lamp. Chip wanted to get down there and check those papers, but he had bigger strudels to stuff.
The third was the jackpot. Better lit than the others, there were several rows of locked cages stacked on shelves, and other shelves of various stores and packages, including industrial sized jars and tins of ingredients. Along one side of the floor, there were several child's sewing machines, several open tins of brown dye, and a big box with an Action Guy logo, and a shipping label.
'1 gross Bad Guyz uniforms, Deliver to: Spiffy Toys, Harland's Mega-Mall.' and the address.'
"So, hijacking shipments to a toy store, is he? I'll bet that's how he got all his stuff. Usual cheapskate M.O, like using second hand cooking equipment." Chip looked over at the cages, which had all sorts of animals, from mice through to squirrels, rabbits and moles, even a family of chipmunks. "Those poor guys…"
There was an isolated cage there, with a dignified rat in a once neat, now torn and stained, lab-coat. He had the same black fur as Marion, though his was speckled with a salting of white.
"My grandfather!" Marion squeaked, and pointed to one of the top row shelves. "We have to get to him!"
"Zipper, do a quick circuit to check if they have a guard in here." Chip said.
Zipper came back with a negative. It seemed they really had sent everyone out for the hunt. There normally was a guard though, because over by the door was a hook with a set of Yale style keys.
Chip checked out the view from the grill. He could jump down a couple of feet, but the drop to the solid floor would be risky. "Unfortunately, there's no shelving on this wall, and I don't have enough rope left on my line to get us down to the floor. I used it on… that's it!"
"Oh no, not that again…" Marion moaned.
&
The sleepy animals in the cages were woken by a metal creak as the air-conditioning grill on the far wall opened. A fly zipped out, followed by a curiously constructed paper plane, with two creatures hanging off it, the rear one for dear life. It spiraled round the room, losing altitude with each cycle, until it grounded on the floor in the centre.
There were various exclamations of surprise as the chipmunk in front peeled himself free.
In response to the rising hubbub, Chip signaled for silence. When he had it, he called out. "We're here to rescue you, all of you. But you'll all need to co-operate."
A worried voice came from one of the lowest level cages, a rabbit. "But the guards..."
"Are off on a wild rat chase at the moment, but we have to hurry. Don't go outside this room unless you want to blow everything."
He turned where Marion stood after freeing herself. "Marion, take the keys and free your grandpa, then get started on the top row. Zipper, middle row, and I'll take the bottom." The locks on the cages were of the ultra cheap 'jewelry' type, barely better than a latch, but quite sufficient to keep an animal inside. Both the Rangers could pick such locks as easily as picking their teeth, Chip having learned from Gadget, Zipper from Monty, so it was a matter of moments before the group of animals were milling around on the floor.
They were a sorry lot, more than Marion had said, as she'd been counting cages, and there were sometimes entire families in a single one. A few had recognised Chip, by his description at least, and the fact he was palling around with a fly, and the news had quickly spread through the crowd. He talked to a few of them, getting their stories, and his opinion of Sugarbottom sank lower then ever. Operating the machines, digging for the secret chamber, making uniforms, even down to the youngest kits. If they didn't work, they didn't eat.
All of them seemed eager to get out, which wasn't surprising. He had been worried at first that some of them might have been hypnotised, but it made sense that they weren't. The hamsters were cage bred, raised by humans to be pets, and would therefore trust a human, especially one that could talk to them. They would likely watch the birdie and quickly be conditioned. From then on repeated doses kept them that way. Big enough to be tough, small enough to outfit with toys. That was probably why Sugarbottom had used them in the first place.
These guys, however, were from the wild, and had been kidnapped. To condition them with a different, complex set of instructions for slavery would take hours, as their natural independence and anger would help them resist. You couldn't have hamsters watching over them, unless you wanted the hamsters affected too, so Sugarbottom would have to oversee it personally.
But time spent doing that, was time not spent running the shop and the retrieval operation. Far easier for a petty bully, cheapskate and short term thinker like Sugarbottom to use threats and punishments to the same end. Besides it probably fed his pitiful ego to be, quite literally, the big boss.
Zipper was using a bottle of food colouring to mark the exit route, and Marion was attending to her grandfather, who'd been particularly badly treated. Meanwhile, Chip managed to ferret out the leaders (though none of the leaders was a ferret) and explained his plan.
"The loading dock is being used by Sugarbottom and his goons, but if we build a stairway out of those cans on the storage shelves, you can get up to the ventilation shaft and out. The left hand route leads to the roof, and left along that, there's a set of rubbish bins which you can use to get down."
"You just leave that there stairway to us, Mister Chip", the oldest mole said, pushing back his hardhat, "When it comes to diggin' holes down, or pilin' stuff up, we moles have the knowing of that."
It didn't take long for the Fore-mole to prove he knew what he was talking about. All the animals went to work with a will, since this was one piece of work they'd be happy to complete. Chip helped organise the families for evacuation, smallest animals first, then bigger ones. Marion and her father were last, because he wanted to see them to safety personally.
When the evacuation started, he had enough time to dash off and do some constructive violence to a certain machine, and to find a certain book and feed it, or at least certain key pages, into the office shredder. That'd put a serious crimp in Sugarbottom's XXXXL shorts.
It was on the way back from this pleasant duty that he heard an ear-splitting crash from the prison room. Zipper burst out, and buzzed frantically. Chip stopped at the door and could see for himself, what the fly was saying. One of the big rabbits had slipped on trying to get into the duct, a fairly tight squeeze. They'd managed to scramble in, but knocked the top of the pile in the process.
The steps had been well designed, but to take vertical pressure, not lateral. The top couple of steps, the lightest stuff had fallen and tumbled enough of the rest that the ventilator duct was now unreachable. Now he, Marion and her grandpa were trapped, and they could hear the voice of doom from outside...
"Gott und Himmel! Vat vas dat crashing? If dose rotten rodent vorkers have caused any damache I vill remove their soft centres personally, vith a schpoon!"
To be continued… – I have only one thing to say… Ewwwwwwwww!
