Mirrors, Queers and Lip-gloss

Preface

Last year is when my life started shattering and getting worse. Three reaons why. Yeah, just three. I became depressed and emotional becuase of three 'little' things. Sure, my summer started out lovely. But as months passed, it got worse and worse. It would've been AWESOME if Hayden, my first love, hadn't left me for my "friend" Natalie. And sure, it would've been AMAZING if Derek, ex best friend, hadn't ended our ten year friendship for some jealous broad. But even if these things hadn't happened, it would've been depressing anyways. Last year was the year my brother killed himself because his life turned miserable two years ago. (I'm not going into that story until later on though, so don't bug me about it.) His last words were written in mirror (MY bathroom mirror) with MY lipgloss. His last words, his last thought, his last breath, he used MY lipgloss and mirror. Oh yeah, and when he slit his throat, he fell to the ground. Tightly gripping a boqueut of lilies: my favorite flowers.

One: Who I Am And Why My Point Of View

My name's Erin Raylee. I'm thirteen years old and I've had more drama in my life than Degrassi. My dad left my mom when I was three along with my thirteen-year-old twin brothers. I don't remember him much, but he was my best friend; so I didn't really understand why he left up until I was seven. Mom didn't talk about him much. Unless she REALLY looked at me and commented on how much I look like him.
My eyes are maroon, a characteristic I'm proud of because I'm unique like that. My hair is so dark brown that without my blonde, pink and blue highlights it'd look black. It's brown though, not black.
I'd say my skin's pretty tan, the mexican side in me. But my face is pale and always is a little pink, British side in me.
Yes, I do have a british accent. Sometimes it's hard to understand what I'm saying, but I'm proud to be a mexican british girl!
Now, even though I have my dad's good looks and charming smile, I have my mother's 'sadly beautiful' soul. I can write amazingly, but I also keep my feelings bottled inside until they're down on paper.

Anyways, I used to be preppy. I was even a cheerleader. I know, that's hard to believe becuase look at me now *She looks down at herself, tucking her bangs behind her ear, revealing black and purple converse, skinny jeans and an 'All Time Low' shirt* After Eric died (my brother), I started seeing things differently. I wore black and dark purple instead of yellow and pink. Skinny jeans instead of skirts and dresses. My point of view changed too. I started ditching cheer-practice for skateboarding and socializing with my guy friends. Cheerleaders became enemies and Skaters/Emos became friends.
I honestly DO believe that I'd still be the same preppy person if Eric hadn't died. I'd forced my mom to explain to me why he'd done what he'd done, and she explained it every time. But I never did, and I never will, understand why he hated life at twenty-two years old. I mean sure, he'd been raised by two preppy girls and never had a male influence in his life, so of course he was gay. He hadn't realized it until he was seventeen though. And even then his boyfriend was cute and pretty nice. He seemed happy until he told Cassie and Cassie told the whole damn school. So he was happy up until October Fourteenth, the day he realized he liked guys instead of girls. The day he told Cassie he was gay. The day his life went from fabulous and happy to chaos and hell.

Thank you for reading!! Chapter Two Coming Soon!!

X?X?

Lexy