Hey, it's my second fanfic, so don't be too harsh. I've wanted very badly to write something about Kenny, so I have. Please tell me what you think!
Disclaimer: Don't owney, k? Except for any OCs I create. Same for all chapters.
Warning: Yaoi/shounen-ai... go away if you don't like it.
Chapter One: Admitting It
You know, I never really thought I was able to feel attracted to other people, at least not the "normal" way. Little did I know how right and wrong I was. Strange, isn't it, what a couple of dreams can teach about your own mind?
Well, I've only recently become sexually mature, which doesn't seem to surprise anyone… I'm still trying to figure out if that's good or bad… But it is good that it's happened, because a growth spurt has definitely enhanced my chances at being noticed. There's a tournament coming up soon, and I'm hoping I'll get at least a little camera action, unlike in the past.
The only problem with being mature is the hormones. Stupid things. Yeah, yeah, I know all about them, believe me. Dizzi even took me on a little "learning experience" sort of trip through the internet. Those were probably the most awkward moments I've ever had with her… and it's even stranger when you realize that I'm talking about a laptop! But anyway, I did learn just about everything about the teenage body and how it works. So now I'm a walking dictionary for everything you ever wanted to know (and a little extra) about beyblading and, sadly, puberty. Lucky thing Dizzi and I are back on speaking terms. She's let up on all that stuff recently. Can't say I'm sorry.
On a slightly different topic, the hormones are really starting to freak me out. Seriously.
The aforementioned dreams are half the problem. You see, they're wet dreams. Never in my short life did I think that I would have to go through the embarrassment of a first wet dream. I was actually forced to corner Ray (since he's the most mature, personality-wise, out of all of us) and ask him what it was. This was obviously before Dizzi decided to take up her roll as a sexual educator. At least Ray was nice about it and as far as I know he hasn't told anyone else, not that that should be such a problem in a house full of boys.
Now, the real problem with these dreams is that they contain the strangest people. At first it was random people like, ahem, Ming Ming. Then there were more people, as in more people in a single dream. Sometimes it was as if I was watching another couple. One strange one that I feel is fit to mention for its extreme hilarity is Max and Mariah. They actually made a pretty cute couple… But that's not the point. The point is that males eventually started making their way into my dreams.
So now I must face it.
It's really hard, to admit it, even to myself…
Oh, okay, here goes.
I'm bisexual.
Agg… How did that happen? I just don't know. By now I've even had exclusively gay dreams, though the faces of my partners are usually blurry. I don't know what that means, at all. I dared to ask Dizzi, since she was pestering me about being in my own world all the time, and she thought that there was nothing wrong or abnormal about it, and that I should just embrace the facts of my biology. Wonderful, isn't it?
I suppose I should also mention the real world effects of these dreams. When they were just women in my dreams, my thoughts began to wander off of beyblading every once in a while and I would suddenly see myself with a girl, alone somewhere talking. Soon that would lead to kissing, or more, but eventually Dizzi or one of my teammates would pull me back. The worst shock started like this:
I was sitting in someone's kitchen and typing on my laptop, when Kai entered the small room. He didn't look around. I didn't want him to. All I could think of for a full five seconds was, He's looking good today. Very good. I never noticed just how handsome Kai is… And then I realized what was happening, unfortunately right when the object of my musings glanced at me. He caught me staring. And the worst of it was, I blushed! I really blushed. Or at least I must have, since I felt like my cheeks were burning up. I took a deep breath and whirled around to my laptop, typing furiously every last bit of gibberish my mind was able to spit out. I could feel Kai looking at me- not glaring as usual (not that he ever really looked at me at all, never mind glared), but just watching me. I could practically feel him cocking his eyebrow in my direction. Oh how I typed… and oh how beautifully poetic my gibberish was.
Soon enough, my hands slowed, my muscles easing into the rhythmic beats of fingers clacking on keys. Dizzi attempted to whisper something to me, but I hissed (yes, hissed) at her to tell her to be quiet. She listened. Amazingly.
And then Ray stepped in, right on cue. I do believe Kai had busied himself with getting something to eat by that time, instead of watching my every move, so there was no hint of the previous "incident". And still, Ray looked incredibly attractive that fine morning. His raven hair was slightly messier than usual, his clothing a bit crinkled, but this only made him, well, sexier. I was sorry to have noticed. Then again, I suppose there's really nothing to be done about it. At least I wasn't crushing on either of them- for lack of a better term. If I actually found myself fantasizing about Kai or Ray, I don't know what I would do. Throw myself off a tall building, perhaps…
How fun! I enjoyed writing this a lot. PLEASE REVIEW! Just tell me if you liked it or not, and if you didn't tell me what I should change, or whether I should continue at all. Please? Thanks!
