I wish i could say that it was okay. That I could stop crying for you. I wish I could give you comfort. The way you gave it to me when I felt so alone. But something stops me. I don't know what it is, but I just can't seem to give you what you need. I almost feel like I don't want to give you what you need. And with that I have to give into my heart. I'm afraid it's come to the time that I realise I've been going on about this all the wrong way. I'm not in love with you. I don't even like you. I'm just trying to find a person that could reflect my feelings for him. I hope there is still time to find them. All I know right now is that I can't do this with you anymore. I truly am sorry that I used you for my own gain. I'm sorry I tried to love you, like I loved him. to transfer a little bit of that love. I see now that that is impossible. The love is so strong. It will kill me, because you were the only one around. I'll be all alone. To try to keep the hurt from swallowing me.
I'll find them and if they truly don't want me anymore, that'll be the end.
"goodbye," I whispered to him for the last time.
(A/N I'm not sure where I wanna go from here yet. I do have a set-up for a later chapter, but I have to get there with the story first. It's also very very busy at school, so I have no idea when I'll be updating. Sorry.)
