Alright. I got it. This is number 30 on my list. Wee! Thirty fanfics! It took me forever to think of something, but I got it. Thank you to everyone that screamed for porn, and for fluff, and for Kakairu. Because it's totally a kakairu with all KINDS of stuff in it. You'll see. XD I'm so excited.

Warning, liberties taken with the timeline and ages. Sorry, but I haven't really paid attention to age differences before. And it's yaoi. That's a second warning/thrilling detail.


Progression of Love


Kakashi shifted uncomfortably beneath the watchful eyes of his superior. There weren't many missions he didn't like doing. In fact, he was just excited to be going on missions, even if they were considerably dumb. For being a five year old genin, he was lucky. "Babies? No." he squirmed again under the intense gaze. "I've never been around babies." he informed dutifully, scratching at his knuckles.

"Could you handle a baby?"

I can handle anything! His mind declared triumphantly. "Yes." he blurted quickly.

"Alright then, Hatake, here is your mission scroll." The missions worker smiled kindly to the five year old, who stood shorter than the missions desk he was currently standing before. Kakashi took the proffered mission and tucked it away before leaving with an uneasy spring in his walk.

"Cute kid." A kunoichi leaned over to the mission worker who had dealt with the child.

"Yeah. He's gonna grow up to be a scary guy though, that's for sure. Genin at five? What, Chuunin at eight you think?"

"No way. Ten! I mean, it's a big advance between genin and chuunin!" she protested, idly glancing at the last mission the boy had returned. It was sitting, crinkled and worn on the desk. "What was his last one? Anything special?" She prodded his elbow to move.

"Hm… he hunted down a lost cat. Quickly, too." He muttered to himself a moment, then sighed and looked across the empty room with a sigh. "I bet he's going to be just like his father. Scary guy."

"Yeah, seriously…"

o0O0o

"Umino-sama." Kakashi bowed low once the door had opened. "I have been assigned your mission." he explained, standing and noticing the man had politely returned the bow. Most of the jounin the small Hatake had had the 'pleasure' of dealing with, did not bow back.

"Ah, yes! Why thank you Hatake-san." he beamed kindly down to the youngster, changing his height to be eye level. "Have you ever babysat before?" Umino-san put his chin on his knuckles and cocked his head to the side with a playful smile.

"Um, no. But… I think I can handle it." Kakashi murmured, just above a mumble.

"Yes, I'm sure you can. Iruka-kun is very well behaved." he beamed to the silver headed child and stood to his full height, "Please come in." The shinobi stepped aside and let the premature genin into his home.

Kakashi sensed immediately the touch of a mother, albeit a kunoichi and tough as nails. The house was baby proof, yet undeniably secure. He was impressed. For a moment, Kakashi was left to stand and admire the inside of the brightly lit apartment. The windows were framed by tan curtains, and the walls were sponged in an array of warm beiges. The coffee table in the center had rubber bumpers all the way around the edges, and any other sharp object was up high and out of reach.

"AWAT!"

Kakashi jolted as his head was jerked backwards with a sharp tug.

"Aaah, Iruka! No! No pulling hair!" A stern frown laced the young woman's features as she forced her thumb into the baby's hand. He let go of Kakashi and kicked wildly in a chaotic dance of 'put me on the ground, now'.

She obliged, sighing and setting the squirming one year old loose on the floor. "Hello, Hatake-san. This is Iruka. He had a long nap, so his energy is restored to full." she explained, hands coming to her hips as she watched the baby scramble off on all fours to the coffee table. The tot, dressed in a forest green body suit that resembled the jounin vests, latched onto the edge of the protected coffee table and hoisted himself to his feet. He gave a happy cry to indicate his victory, and turned his head to stare wide eyed at his mother.

"I see that, Iruka! You pulled yourself up!" she congratulated joyfully.

Iruka let go of the table and clapped his petit hands together, knowing the praising face meant he'd done well. He turned the exuberant gaze to Kakashi, still clapping in expectancy of the new face to join in the joyful.

Kakashi shifted uncomfortably.

Umino-san snickered.

With a slight tilt of the head, Kakashi gave him a look that stated, "I'm not afraid, challenge me, I dare you."

"Alright!" Umino clapped his own hands together, walking forward and slipping a hand around his wife's waist. "We have a meeting with the Hokage that should last about two hours or so. Not long." He thumped Kakashi on the head reassuringly.

The boy gritted his teeth and took the abuse to his silver hair. "Yes, Umino-san. I will protect the baby till you get back." He stated firmly, crossing his arm and puffing his chest out in a display of bravado.

"The only thing you will be protecting him from is himself. He's a very curious kid." Umino-san scratched the back of his head and squinted in deep thought. "Uh… keep your kunai secured."

"Yes," Iruka's mother smiled proudly, "And the rest of your pockets as well. He learned how to hit the release buttons on holsters and scroll pouches. He's very smart." She concluded, wincing as the baby took a few tottering steps before falling flat on his face.

Kakashi raised on lazy eyebrow. "Yeah… smart."

The tot let out scream of sorrow for his tumble, looking up expectantly to his parents. "Iruka, what's wrong, hm?" Umino-sama smiled and picked the child up, walking him over and holding him eye level to his new babysitter. "Guess what! Hatake-san is going to watch you while we're gone!" He bounced his knee beneath the boy's bum, jolting away the tears.

After a moment, Iruka ceased his wails and only stared. He stared and stared until Kakashi felt suddenly embarrassed. His cheeks tinted pink and he averted his eyes. "Um… two hours you said?"

"Yes. Will you be alright, Hatake-san?" The kind woman smiled and began pulling her gear together.

"We'll be fine." Kakashi assured her, thrusting his hands out in indication to Umino-sama. "I'll take him from here. You have nothing to worry about."

The man grinned and ruffled Kakashi's hair for a second time, "Alright, we're off. If you need us, we'll be with the Hokage in his office." With no more than a slight toss, Iruka was in Kakashi's arms, awkwardly held between the legs and across the back.

"His toys are in his bedroom, and he likes to take them out here which is fine. He's just learning to walk, so he needs to hold your hands to get very far. If he gets hungry, he'll rub his tummy. So there are some fruit slices in the fridge. You should be fine, don't worry. And diapers are in his bedroom." She flashed a grin at the petrified boy. "Bye Iruka!" The loving mother leaned down and thumped a kiss to his forehead. "Be good for Kakashi-kun!" In a few retreating steps, she backed away and waved to them both. In a poof, the living room was empty save for two young, soon to be ninjas, slowly increasing with worry.

Iruka sniffled.

Kakashi froze. Oh kami, no.

The one year old let out a horrendous scream and began kicking against Kakashi's chest. It was a fight for freedom which Kakashi recognized immediately. He quickly set the baby on the ground and stared in fright. "What?!"

Iruka sniffled again and sat there, dumbfounded expression clouding his chubby face. "Mamaaaa!"

"She went to see the Hokage." The boy dropped to his knees in front of the angry child.

"Daaaaa!"

"Um…"

"Daaadaaaaaa!" he wailed again, this time ending the word in a piercing screech.

"He's at the Hokage's, too!"

The baby, angry at the one who appeared to be replacing his beloved parents, lurched forward on hands and knees and began scampering to the kitchen, all the while wailing for each parent one at a time.

Kakashi sighed heartily, shoulders hunching forward in defeat. This was going to be terrible.

"Um, Iruka… uh… look! Toys!" Kakashi snagged the first toy he found from the ground and shook the odd looking contraption. The determined child ignored him and scampered by furiously.

For a few moments, the assigned babysitter could only watch with a haunting dread in the pit of his stomach. Hatake Kakashi was going to be a ninja. Hatake Kakashi was not apt at ninja children. There was a difference that obviously someone at the missions room had overlooked.

Another piercing yell echoed off the kitchen tiles, Iruka searching valiantly for the safety of mother's arms. The boy they had left him with was scary looking, and not mother-like in any way.

With firm determination, Kakashi crossed his arms and only followed the baby boy around the house, never trying to touch him or coax him in any way. One way or another, the little snot had to figure out that no one was there. Then Kakashi would take the opening and display his own good qualities to the baby. He would… He would offer to play! That's it.

Kakashi scooped up as many toys as he could find, quickly catching up to his young mission. After a few long minutes, Iruka plopped down in the middle of the hallway, tears of sorrow beginning to drip from his eyes. Indeed, no one was home.

Ready for the challenge again, Kakashi sat on his knees in front of the baby and laid all the toys out for him. "I'll play with you." he stated, as if that were the only choice available.

The tot teetered backwards on his bum to look up Kakashi, then flopped backwards ungracefully. His feet stuck in the air as his head nestled into the carpet. He stared upward in dumbfounded annoyance, rolling onto his stomach and finally crawling away. Kakashi sighed and gazed at the diaper clad rump as it wattled down the hallway. Plan one had failed. Plan two?

"Iruka-kun, do you want to go for a walk in the backyard?"

A babble of nonsense was his return, but Iruka continued to bang on the bedroom door demandingly. Kakashi obliged.

Inside was a flourish of blues and silvers and whites, all shimmering in the sunlight that flitted through white curtains over a blue wall. Iruka gurgled in excitement and launched at a chest of toys, weakly trying to open the lid. When he could not get a leeway on the toy box, he turned and yelled a strangle plea for help.

A bit surprised, but not disappointed, the genin jumped to obey the command. He swung the toy chest lid open and propped it up. In went two stubby little hands to rifle around the treasure, picking out and throwing what he liked onto the floor behind him.

Shaky hips wobbled in unbalance, and Kakashi felt the need to aid the little one before he fell. He reached out and put a hand on either side of the shaky hips. Iruka knew the feeling, and immediately began attacking the toy box with gusto. With his balance taken care of, he was free to fling more toys at once.

The genin dodged the flying plastic bombardment, all the while holding chubby legs steady. Iruka was not fast per se, but he had flinging capabilities like no other.

"I think that is enough toys now, Iruka-kun." The Hatake winced as bird shaped toy landed in his silver mop of hair. As if it weren't already tangled, now he had a bird in his hair. Really now, what sort of ninja training was this supposed to be anyway? He was better than this, his father had told him so.

He set Iruka on his bum in front of the toys that weren't somehow attached to his person, and proceeded to shake his head in annoyance. The bird dislodged, the fell gracefully with a thunk directly to the top of Iruka-kun's head.

In an instance, Kakashi had iced over and Iruka had took in a giant breath. Eyes misting, the tot turned a curious expression up to his assailant before he opened his mouth and exercised his lungs.

"Ah…!" He struggled for the course action in which to take. This had not been covered in the Academy. There was no 'How to Aid Babies Screaming Bloody Murder' There had only been, 'How to Aid Pregnant Mothers' . Which did not help Kakashi in the slightest seeing as how the baby had for some time been outside the womb.

"Iruka…" he murmured, finally reaching down and scooping the baby into his lap. "I'm sorry…" he offered weakly, not noticing much that the boy was responding positively to the arms. Iruka had curled up into his babysitter's embrace, hands on either arm as he cried into Kakashi's chest in woe. For a long while, Kakashi didn't know what to do and only sat there, trying to comfort the child. Iruka broke off into deep huffy breaths, the crying ceased for the time being. He grunted in annoyance and leaned back to look up at Kakashi curiously. A weak, "Ow…" was his explanation, one stubby hand reaching up to hold the top of his head.

"Yes, I'm sorry for the ow." Kakashi murmured, knowing full well he hadn't apologized for anything in what seemed like forever. But… Iruka was too innocent. He would always apologize to such an innocent looking face. "Uh, are you alright now?"

Iruka didn't have the words to reply, and only looked down at Kakashi's weapons vest. It wasn't like his parents, but it was similar. With no more thought to the lump on his head or the attack bird that had created it, Iruka became entranced with the many pockets and pouches before him. It was like heaven. One hand began working at the button closest to him, the other gripping Kakashi's sleeve for vertical support.

"Ah… That's…" He trailed off when the baby popped open the pouch with much fuss and hard work. Then he moved to the next pocket with little regard for the contents of the first. The vest's owner saw no harm in this and let the baby pop open buttons and latches on the vest all he wanted.

Iruka was quite content with this game of pockets. Kakashi even took the liberty of rebuttoning all of them so he could start over on the unbuttoning process. An ingenious plan, according to the Hatake.

"I like this game." Kakashi muttered, sitting patiently and letting the button game eat up as much time as possible. If he was lucky, the kid would do this for the next two hours.

Suddenly, Iruka stopped, eyes glazing over and one finger poised above a button. He turned his face up to Kakashi as if to tell him something important. Kakashi blinked several times, wondering if he should be worried. He had a bad feeling.

Iruka's face abruptly changed from innocent to intense pain. He grunted, then farted. Kakashi's nose began to sting, and something lumpy squished against his leg.

"I hate you."

The Academy had not offered, 'Diaper Changing 101' in its course line up, either.

Iruka gurgled, then continued with the game of buttons as if nothing had happened. Kakashi's eyes began to water as his nose protested avidly. Hatake Kakashi was going to be a ninja. And for the record, Hatake Kakashi did not like ninja babies.


So. This is going to be a progression of the Kakairu pair we all know and love. We will, in essence, see them "grow up" together. Or something. Actually, it was all a scheme for me to have a wittle baby Iwuka in a ficlet. Yes.